Like You Mean It

by Jillian Liota

  Annie gives the other woman a hug and a wave, and she climbs into a car and drives off. I take that as my opportunity.

  “Hey, Annie,” I say.

  Her head whips around in surprise, and for a split second, I see pure joy in her eyes. A huge smile stretches out on her face. But then she subdues herself, and I don’t know why.

  “Hey. What’s up?”

  “Have a good day?”

  Her eyes flash with happiness. “Yeah, I really did. I went with my friend from high school to get pedicures.” She sticks her foot forward to show me her toes, freshly buffed and polished with a hot pink color.

  “Damn. You’re gonna blind me with those,” I say, covering my eyes for a second and making her laugh.

  “How’s your Sunday going?” She glances around a bit. “No Jess this weekend?”

  I sense a bit of hesitation in her voice when she asks. And I understand why. Jess has been a bit of a bitch to her. She probably wants to know if she should run and hide in case Jess is gonna pull up any moment and give her that uncomfortable half smile-half glare thing she did last week.

  “Nah, she had to work. I guess when a bank gets audited, it’s all hands on deck. So I’m just enjoying a solo day.”

  She just nods.

  “Hey, look. I’m sorry Jess hasn’t been that welcoming to you. I don’t know what crawled up her ass, but she’s normally a pretty nice person. I guess she’s just feeling a little threatened and decided to let out her Regina George.”

  “Oh, don’t even worry abou… wait, threatened by what?”

  My brows scrunch up.

  “By you. My single female neighbor.”

  And then she breaks into some weird, uncomfortable laughter that resembles a hyena.

  “Me? What threatens her most? My huge stomach that makes me barely able bend over to pick something up? Or my swollen hands and feet and face? Or maybe it’s the uncontrollable gas that makes my kid laugh his ass off every day?”

  I giggle at that.

  “I knew you’d laugh. You’re such a boy.”

  I just grin at her.

  “Look, I’ve told her she has to cool it. That you and I are… friends. And that you and Jones are important to me. So she’ll be nicer next time.”

  She shrugs.

  “Well, you can’t control whether she’s nice or not. Just so you know, I’ll still be your friend even if she doesn’t like me. As long as it comes with pool privileges.”

  I shake my head with a smile.

  “I see how it is.”

  “Oh do you, now?”

  “Mmmmhm. I feel so used.”

  And then we both laugh. Just as Annie is turning and about to say goodbye, a thought occurs to me.

  “Hey just so you know, my parents got back recently from a trip to Florida, and they’re coming over for a late lunch barbeque in about,” I glance at my watch, “an hour. Do you and Jones wanna come over and join us?”

  She looks skeptical for just a moment.

  “They’ve heard all about Jones and how he’s taken up residence in my pool.” I shrug.” And they’re bringing chips and salsa, and I’m making some carne asada for tacos. It’s my specialty.”

  Apparently I say the magic words, because I literally hear her stomach growl with agreement.

  She bursts into laughter, then feigns anger and glares down at her stomach.

  “Thanks for giving me away, guppy!” she growls at her unborn child. Then she glances up at me. “Would Jess be okay with it?”

  I roll my eyes.

  “My parents said they want to meet my neighbor. That’s not for Jess to decide.”

  She squints her eyes at me, then looks away for a moment, scratching a spot on her face as she mulls it over.

  “Jones is with Mimi right now, but will be back in a little bit. I’ll make sure he gets cleaned up, and then we’ll be over. But only if you’re sure you have enough?”

  I nod, relief flooding through me. I don’t know why I’m so concerned about her coming over for this dinner, but it suddenly became incredibly important that she come. “Don’t worry. We have tons of food. Enough for the whole block. Really, you’re doing me a favor by making sure it gets eaten.”

  She smiles again. “Alright, see you soon then. And don’t think I’m not going to take advantage of that Mean Girls reference at some point, by the way.”

  My cheeks flush a little, but I laugh it off as she heads to her house.

  You end up knowing weird shit when you have a sister.

  Thirty minutes later, my parents are sitting at the bar in my kitchen, munching on their chips and salsa and gabbing about their trip to Florida.

  “And then Maura looks at Gary and says, ‘Well, I don’t know how you do things in California, but in Florida we don’t double dip our chips.’” My mom bursts into laughter. “And I just wanted to tell her to shove her chips up her ass. Come on. Like double dipping a chip makes you some classless ingrate.” She rolls her eyes and I just shake my head at her.

  “Oh come on, Sammy, don’t be so hard on her. She was just feeling threatened.”

  My mom’s eyes bulge from her head and then she glares at Gary. “Threatened? By what? My wedding ring? We’re already married, and have been for nearly 30 years.”

  The doorbell rings, and I shout “Come in!” to let Annie know she can just walk in. A few seconds later, I hear the door open and close, and then little feet race across the hardwood and into the kitchen.

  “Cole! Look what I got at the mall!!”

  Jones runs across the room and right next to my hip, holding up a bag with a goldfish swimming around inside of it.

  “He begged me to let him bring it with him. Jones, what did you decide to name your goldfish?” Annie says, her eyes catching mine.

  “Cheeto!”

  I bark out a laugh, then bend over and look Jones right in the eye.

  “Awesome name, dude.”

  I look over at my parents and see them beaming at Annie. After a brief pause, they get up to introduce themselves with big hugs.

  “I’m Sammy, Cole’s mom,” she says, taking her seat back at the bar. “And this handsome fella is my beau, Gary.”

  “Beau?” Gary chimes in. “She makes it sound like we haven’t been married for three decades.”

  My mom slaps her hand on the counter. “Right? And we have. Which is why Maura can go shove off a cliff.”

  Annie’s eyes widen and her eyebrows fly up. “Who’s Maura?”

  “Oh don’t worry,” I say, before my mom can launch into a retelling of how Maura ruined her and Gary’s trip to Florida. “She’s unimportant.”

  “Unimportant?” Gary cries out, resting his hand on his chest. “She is only the great love of my life.” At my mom’s mouth dropping open, Gary amends. “Oh wait no, that’s you.”

  My mom blushes like she’s 16. I chuckle under my breath. And Annie continues to look confused but amused, which I think is the best way to react to my mom and Gary.

  “In a nutshell,” I say to Annie, moving the meat around in the pan to give it a good sear, “Maura and Gary dated in high school, but Maura gave Gary an ultimatum. Either he didn’t enlist in the military, or she was breaking up with him.”

  Annie actually gasps. “What a bitch!”

  There’s a brief pause, and Annie slaps her hand over her mouth, eyeing Jones, who has already set himself up at the kitchen table with his coloring books and doesn’t seem to be listening. “Sorry.”

  I just smile and continue on. “She was, indeed. Well, Gary here met my mom when I was six and they fell deeply, deeply in love.” My mom makes an awwww sound. “But before they could get married, guess who shows up to declare her undying affection for Gary?”

  “That bitch, Maura?”

  I point my spatula at Annie. “Correct! Gary, of course, tells her he’s in love, but not with her, and to scamper off. Gary married my mom, and has been a dope ass dad to me and my sister, if I may be allowed to say so?”
>
  “Of course, you may,” Gary chimes in.

  “But the great bitch Maura has never been able to let go. She resurfaces every few years and gets in my parents’ business when they visit Florida, showing up at family dinner functions and interrupting parties.”

  “And she’s married with three kids!” my mom cries out.

  “Wow,” Annie says.

  “And that, Annie girl, is the story of the great bitch Maura.”

  Gary and my mom start clapping, and Annie joins in as I take a mocking bow.

  “That was hilarious,” Annie says, sidling up next to me at the stove when my parents turn their attention to Jones. “I feel like I just saw a completely different side of you. And I like it.”

  I smile as I move the meat around to make sure it’s all good to go.

  “My mom made me take theatre classes when I was in high school,” I say to her as I pull the pan off and put the meat onto a chipping board. “She told me I could only be a great man if I understood and respected the arts. And it was theatre or dance lessons. I was hoping to play sports, and the dance lessons would have messed with my schedule, so theatre it was.”

  “That’s amazing!” she says, her eyes big with awe and admiration, I think.

  Then there’s a pause as she just stares at me.

  “What?” I ask.

  “I just… I don’t know. I’ve always wondered how you were so fun and playful with Jones but seem a bit more reserved with… other people.” She shrugs. “I don’t know. I just…” and then she gives me a soft smile. “I just like that silly side. That’s all. It’s refreshing.”

  I nod, letting her words soak into my heart. When you work with cars and used to fight MMA and ride a motorcycle, let alone are known as a fairly quiet guy, exploding out like that with theatrical stories isn’t always received so well. Sometimes, it’s just easier to keep that stuff in boxes.

  Jess definitely isn’t a fan. But I think that’s because I fit the mold she wants for herself. The quiet, somewhat surly biker and mechanic with a pretty decent sized dick and plenty of tattoos.

  But I can’t say that to Annie. So I just nod and start cutting up the carne into smaller pieces so we can make tacos.

  “So what sport did you play, then?” she asks.

  “Oh,” I say, scoffing. “The sports thing never happened. Not really, anyway.”

  “Why not? You seem like a guy who would have… uhm, yeah, you look like you could have played sports at my high school.”

  I glance over at her quickly then back to where I’ve grabbed an onion and I’m slowly chopping it into little bits, hiding my smirk at the blush I see in her cheeks.

  I could tease her about her envisioning my body as an athlete, or about how I caught her eyes on me when I was dressed up as a biker for Halloween. And even though it would just be playful fun, it’s probably crossing the line.

  “I got a job instead. Wanted some extra cash to pay for the gear, but liked the job more than the idea of playing sports.” And then I freeze, knowing I just made a huge error. I close my eyes for just a second and hope my parents aren’t listening and don’t take this as an opportunity to chime in.

  “Oh don’t be so modest, mister!” my mom says, returning to the bar and grabbing a chip. “You were quite the little fighter back then. You might not have played high school sports, and I may never have been a fan of the fighting, but you did such a good job, honey.”

  I let out a relieved breath that my mom hasn’t bought up The Garage, and use it as an opportunity to redirect.

  “Alright! Time for tacos!” I shout to the room.

  Everyone crowds around, getting their warmed-up corn tortillas, carne asada, onion, and cilantro.

  “And I grabbed a bottle of the salsa verde from that taco place you love, mom,” I say, passing it over to her.

  She smiles and pats my face.

  A few minutes later, we’re all sitting at my kitchen table, and my parents are asking Annie a million questions about her and Jones. Where is she from originally? California. Oh, so why did she move to Chicago? Followed her high school boyfriend. Was that scary? Absolutely.

  I made sure to steer the conversation away from talk of the ex, not knowing where the sensitive points are. But that doesn’t keep my parents from asking more questions.

  How is she liking being back? So far, so good. What does she do for work? Graphic design and a new job at the coffee shop.

  “Wait, what?” I ask. “The Steam Room? I didn’t know you were looking for another job,” I say, taking a massive bite of a taco.

  “Well, I’d considered trying to live on just the graphic design work and try and build it up, and I might do that down the road. But right now, with everything going on and how expensive things are, it just feels smarter to get in some extra income while I build up the graphic design work. Because Jones’ daycare and rent and the work on my car?” She shakes her head, and lifts a taco towards her mouth. “It’s too much right now.”

  I should have seen the opening there. The chance for my mom or Gary to bring it up. But my mouth was full.

  “Oh honey, you could have had Cole take a look at your car,” my mom says.

  She glances at me and then back at my mom, speaking after finishing off her bite. “That’s okay. I actually wound up at this really great place a few miles away. And the owner is letting me do a payment plan, which has been just an absolute godsend. It’s actually right across from my new job, so it will be easy to go over and make the payments,” she says with a little laugh. “I’ll just get a paycheck and walk across the street with it.”

  “Are you talking about The Garage?” Gary asks, a look of confusion on his face.

  I try to say something, but instead, I inhale a piece of onion against the back of my throat. I start coughing and have to take a drink of water.

  “Yeah!” she says. “I highly recommend it. They did some amazing work on my car.”

  And then she takes another bite of her taco.

  Just as I’m finishing my sip of water, mom says, “Oh, that’s Cole’s shop.”

  Annie’s mouth stops chewing, her eyes flying to mine. “Wa?” she says, even though her mouth is full. And her eyes never leave mine, even though my mom kind of babbles on in the background.

  “Honey, did Cole not tell you that’s his shop? Oh it made us so proud when he bought it. He’s been the owner for quite a while now. How long has it been? Nine years?” When I don’t answer, she just continues on. “It’s so funny that you ended up there, out of all the places you could have gone in the area. Isn’t that funny, Gary?”

  Annie’s eyes get a bit misty as I watch her, but she looks away from me, covers her lips with her hand, mumbles “Scuseme” through her mouth full of food, and then leaves the table.

  I close my eyes, let out a sigh and rest my forehead in my hands. It’s only then my mom gets the picture and stops talking.

  “Mom?” Jones shouts after her. “What’s wrong?”

  “Don’t worry, dude,” I say, giving him a smile. “She’s fine. I’m gonna go check on her so she knows we have something pretty cool for dessert, okay?”

  Jones gives me a smile and sticks another piece of meat in his mouth.

  I glare at my mother, who has an apologetic look on her face, although I’m sure she doesn’t understand what’s happening. And then I leave the table and follow her down the hallway.

  When I come to the closed bathroom door, I knock. I don’t hear any movement, so I knock again.

  “Annie,” I say, my voice gentle but still loud enough for her to hear me. “Come on out, sweetheart, please?”

  The door flies open and there she stands, her arms crossed, tears gone, and a look that can kill.

  “Was it funny to you?” she asks.

  My brow furrows in confusion.

  “Huh?”

  “Was it funny? Hiding this from me? Watching me show up with cookies to say thank you? Listening to me talk about how hard things h
ave been financially and knowing you’re… you’re… pulling the strings?”

  “What? No. Look, Annie, I didn’t mean…”

  “Then it was the pity, right? Oh, poor little neighbor, can’t even afford to take care of her car. Well, news flash, I am very capable of taking care of myself and my kid.”

  “Annie, I know that, okay?”

  “Do you really? Do you really know that, Cole? Because it seems like you think I’m some loser that you have to fix. And guess what? We don’t need it. Andrew may have treated me like shit, but he never made me feel like he was only around out of pity.” And then she storms down the hallway back towards the front.

  When I follow her, I hear her say “I’ll be right back,” to my parents and Jones at the table. And then I hear the front door open and close.

  I come around the corner and see Jones chomping away happily at his food, and my parents looking at each other, trying to figure out what’s going on.

  “She didn’t know I owned The Garage,” I say. “And I set her up on a payment plan for her car, because the amount of work on it was insane.”

  “And you didn’t think it would be a good idea for her to know you owned the place? You probably could have avoided this whole thing.”

  My mother is always the voice of reason. I just nod at her, because yeah, I could have told her.

  The front door flies back open and Annie walks back in with a piece of paper in her hand.

  “Here you go.”

  She slaps it down on the counter.

  “Paid in full.” Then she turns to Jones. “Come on mister, we need to go home.”

  “But I don’t want to!” he whines. “Cole said we were having dessert!”

  “We have cookies at home,” she says. And Jones pouts and throws a pretty mild tantrum, all things considered, as Annie gets him out of his chair.

  “Gary. Sammy. Lovely to meet you. I’m just a very upset pregnant woman who wants to go home. So hopefully, we can have a better chat some other time.”

  My mom gives her a big smile. “Have a wonderful evening, dear. I look forward to seeing you again, very soon.”

  Annie gives her a tight smile, picks Jones up even as he squirms with displeasure, grabs Cheeto in the baggie on the counter, and stalks out without so much as a backward glance my way. And when I walk over to the counter and take a look, I see a check, for the full amount of the work done on the car.