Once Upon a Cowboy Christmas--A River Ranch Novel

by Soraya Lane

  Cody hung up and ran the few blocks to his office, letting himself in and grabbing his laptop and some files. When he left the office this time and flagged down a taxi, it was to head downtown for some late-night shopping and then to his apartment to pack his overnight bag. He was going home, and for the first time in as long as he could remember, he wasn’t going under duress.

  And this time he wasn’t coming back until he got what he wanted.

  Chapter 20

  “SWEETHEART, we can’t take the pony with us,” Lexi said, her heart breaking as she watched her son’s face crumple. This was the real deal, his pain almost tangible, and completely unlike the usual fake tears that came with a tantrum.

  “But I love Cleo, Mom,” he whispered, his voice catching as he started to cry again. “Why can’t you talk to Mr. Ford?”

  She wished Harry knew how hard it was for her too. She wanted to collapse and cry, and admit to her son that she was leaving behind something, someone, she loved too, but that wasn’t going to help her.

  “We don’t have anywhere to keep a pony, and besides, Mia’s kids are going to want to learn to ride on her. We can always come back to see him whenever you want.”

  “I hate you!” Harry screamed, eyes frantic as he threw his soft toy at her and ran out of the room. “Why do we have to leave, anyway?”

  She didn’t bother going after him or yelling back that that wasn’t the way they spoke to each other, because she knew what he was going through. They’d had so much change to deal with over the past couple of years, and being here had been a welcome reprieve. For a while, she’d felt like she belonged too, but staying just didn’t feel right any longer. She’d found a replacement before formally handing in her notice, despite Walter insisting that he wasn’t allowing her to leave, but it was just too painful anymore. Maybe it had been a bad idea right from the start, but it had seemed like the perfect job—with the exception of Cody. For the first few months, before he’d come back, she’d almost been able to pretend that caring for Walter would have nothing to do with Cody.

  When Cody had been at the ranch, it had seemed impossible; and now that he was gone, it was somehow even more impossible. She was a muddle of thoughts and worries, her heart yearning for something her mind knew wasn’t even possible.

  A knock at the door took her by surprise, and she looked around, wishing the place wasn’t such a mess. She’d already started boxing up some of her belongings, so there were things stacked everywhere.

  “Just a minute!” she called out, running her palms down her jeans and smoothing her hair down.

  She swung open the door and was surprised to see a man in a suit standing there, briefcase in hand.

  “Hi,” she said. “Should I have been expecting you?”

  He shook his head and held out his hand. “Bryan Gordon. I’m the Ford family attorney and I’ve just been up at the house to see Walter.”

  She nodded. “Okay. Is there something I’ve done wrong or…” Her voice trailed off. Was she going to have to sign something? “I’ve already signed a confidentiality agreement, as part of my employment, if that’s what you’re concerned about.” She hadn’t realized it would be so involved to leave her job with the Fords. “You’re not going to have any issues with me post-employment, if that’s what you’re worried about.”

  “No, nothing of the sort. May I come in?”

  She stood back and waited for him to pass, before following him to her small kitchen table. He sat down and pulled out a wad of papers. Lexi wasn’t sure whether to offer coffee or to just sit, so she went with sitting.

  “I’m sure you’re aware that Walter is very fond of you and is extremely upset about your departure,” the attorney said, pushing some papers toward her. “However, he put this in place some weeks ago and insists that it remain in place despite your imminent departure.” He chuckled. “However, he did offer me a very generous bonus if I managed to convince you to stay.”

  Lexi coughed, or maybe she choked, her hand flying to her mouth as she glanced over the papers. She didn’t need to be a lawyer to understand what he’d done. Her eyes ran back over the words again, and then again, more slowly the last time as she digested what it all meant.

  “I…” She didn’t even know where to start. Walter had made a name for himself as the toughest businessman in Texas, and yet here he was wanting to give her so much.

  “I understand it’s a lot to comprehend, and I need to explain that, although Walter would prefer you stay in his employ, he understands and respects your decision. This is something he’d like to do as a gesture of friendship from the Ford family.”

  Lexi started to shake her head. “This is so very generous, but I can’t accept it. There’s no way I could accept it.”

  He looked amused, but seemed to ignore her statement. “Your mother’s care will be paid for as soon as the documents are signed, and that includes all future care regardless of the facility required. The financial responsibility will be taken over entirely by the Ford family trust, and I don’t think Walter will take no for an answer.”

  “No,” Lexi said as disbelief flooded her. “N-No, he can’t do that. H-He can’t pay, it’s too much.” She realized she was stuttering, that she was trying to speak too fast and not getting her words out properly. “I simply can’t accept it.”

  “Walter can do this, and he wants to,” the attorney said. “He told me you might be reluctant at first to accept help, but he also told me that he wants your mother to have the best care money can buy.” He lowered his voice. “Just like his wife had while she was alive, and what he’s had since his diagnosis.”

  Lexi gulped. It would be so easy to say no, because she didn’t want to be indebted to Cody in any way, but what Walter was offering her? It was enormous. Life changing, even. It would mean that she could make decisions that didn’t revolve around the monthly bill she had to pay for her mother’s care, or worry about having to take her in and give up her job to care for her.

  “What do you need me to do?” she finally asked.

  “Sign the papers,” he said. “We can either do it now or I can leave them for you to consider or send to your own attorney.”

  Her hands were trembling and she fisted them, forcing herself to meet the attorney’s gaze. “Thank you for delivering the papers, but I’m going to have to seriously consider this for a few days before signing.”

  He closed the folder and left it there on the table, and Lexi rose to let him out at the same time as a loud thumping echoed on the door. No one ever came to her door, and suddenly she had two visitors within half an hour.

  “Thanks for coming over. I’ll go and speak with Walter later today, if that’s okay?”

  The knock sounded again and she walked fast to the door.

  The attorney chuckled. “It’s more than okay. From what he told me he’s missing you already and he’s hoping you’ll, in his words, feel sorry for the old bastard and stay a bit longer.”

  The door suddenly burst open and big, deep dark brown eyes met hers.

  “Cody?”

  “Ahh, sorry,” he muttered when he saw she was with someone. “Should I go and wait outside until you’re finished here?”

  “I’m just leaving, so don’t mind me,” the attorney said, holding out a hand to Cody as he passed. “Good to see you again.”

  “You too, sorry, I wasn’t expecting…” Cody’s voice trailed off and suddenly his attention was directed at her.

  “What are you doing here?” she asked, taking in the suit, the shiny black boots, his coat, and the immaculate leather bag dropped at his feet. “And why the hell did you just burst through the door like that?”

  Cody strode across the room and then marched straight back to her, his eyes wide as he dropped to his knee. He reached for her hand and she numbly let him take it as she watched him. What the hell was he doing?

  “Cody—” she started before he abruptly cut her off.

  “Please, Lexi, I’ve been up all n
ight and I…” He squeezed her hand. “Lexi, I have so much to say sorry for, but the thing is, I came back here for Christmas and saw you, and everything I’ve done since then has been one big fuck-up.” He let out a breath and brought his lips to her hand. “Well, almost everything.”

  “Cody, get up. You don’t need to be—”

  It seemed he wasn’t worried about what she thought, he had a look in his eyes she didn’t recognize, a desperation that seemed so unlike him. Cody always looked like he had it together. He was dressed perfectly, he looked perfect, he spoke beautifully, he seemed impossible to rattle. Until right now, when he looked genuinely unhinged and … a sense of calm settled over her. He looked vulnerable. That’s what it was, he was vulnerable, and it was a side she hadn’t seen before—at least not in a very long time.

  “Lexi, I love you,” Cody said, his voice raspy as he stared up at her. “I think I always have, only I pushed everything away when I left here, including you.”

  Tears pooled in her eyes. “I don’t want to go over the past again, Cody. We’ve already talked it to death.”

  She saw tears sparkling in his eyes too, and it was her squeezing his hand now.

  “Lexi, I think I’ve always loved you,” he repeated. “No, I know I’ve always loved you, but somewhere along the way I lost myself and I managed to lose you too. I pushed away everyone I loved. My mom, my sisters, my old friends, and you.”

  Lexi dropped to her knees then too, wanting to hold him, wanting to comfort him, because this wasn’t like the apologies he’d given her. This wasn’t him telling her what she wanted to hear or what he thought he needed to say. This was raw Cody Ford like she’d never, ever seen him before. She didn’t even remember him being this open as a teenager.

  “We had something great, Cody, we did. I know we were young and it was probably too soon for either of us, but I loved you, too.”

  He lifted his hand, hovering as if waiting for permission, giving her the chance to push him away, before carefully cupping her face so tenderly she couldn’t help but lean in to his touch.

  “Lexi, I need help. I need to go into the past and figure a lot of stuff out, but I promise you I’ll get the help I need,” he said. “I think, well, I know, that I suffered from a form of PTSD. When Mom became sick, I changed, and I don’t remember how or why, but all I really knew was that I had to get away from here. And you became part of my collateral damage.”

  “Oh, Cody,” she whispered, as tears started to plop slowly down her cheeks. She smiled when he gently caressed them away with his thumb, seeing the man she used to love and wanting to grab hold of him and never let go. “I know we were young and it was a long time ago, but—”

  “Marry me,” he said, staring at her so earnestly she couldn’t break his stare. “I’ve been an ass and I never should have left you the first time, let alone the second time, but if you say yes, I promise I’ll never leave you again.”

  Marry him? First Walter offered her money, and now Cody was asking her to marry him? What was it with the Ford men today?

  “Cody, I—”

  “You know what, don’t say anything,” he said, interrupting her. Her dropped her hand and reached into his jacket pocket, pulling out a little velvet box and slowly opening it. “This is for you, Lexi. I love you and I’m sorry it’s taken so long for me to find my way back to you, but I know that I want to spend the rest of my life with you.”

  She felt tears welling again, her body shaking as she stared down at an enormous diamond set on a band of smaller diamonds, all twinkling up at her.

  He snapped the box shut and passed it to her.

  “When you’re ready, if you decide to say yes, I’ll be here waiting. Either way, this ring is for you. I want you to be my wife, Lexi. Being with you, being back here, it made me feel alive in a way I haven’t felt in years.”

  “Did you know your dad wants to take over all costs for my mother’s care?”

  Cody’s smile said it all. “Yes, I did. Only he expected you to keep working for him as long as he was able to stay at home.”

  “Did you ask him to do it? Was this actually—”

  “No,” he interrupted. “This was all the old man. He called me into his office over Christmas to tell me his plans, and to make sure I’d have the documents executed if anything were to happen to him. He really likes you, Lexi, and he knows what it’s like trying to get the very best care for someone you love.”

  Emotion choked her, lodging in her throat as she realized that this was as much about Cody’s mom as it was about hers. The Fords were a loving, generous family, and she could see why Walter was doing it now, and why she needed to let him.

  Lexi held the soft box in her hand, thumb brushing across the velvety surface, struggling to breathe as his words played over and over in her mind. Cody leaned in then, his eyes on hers as he cupped her chin and covered her mouth with his, his kiss so soft she barely felt it. But she wanted more, she wanted to feel it, so she wrapped an arm around him and pulled him closer, lips firm to his, wanting him so badly. She wanted his body against hers, his mouth whispering against hers all night. Hell, she wanted Cody for a lifetime, she always had.

  “Yes,” she whispered when they finally broke for air.

  “Yes?” he repeated, pulling back to study her face.

  “Yes,” she said again, laughing as his hands came up to frame each side of her face, grinning as he leaned in to kiss her again.

  “Cody!” Harry’s squeal of excitement had them scrambling apart, and Cody was on his feet before she was, running a hand through his hair before opening his arms to her son. As she watched, slowly finding her way up, Cody swung him into the air, so natural with him as her little boy’s face lit up into one of the biggest smiles she’d ever seen.

  Lexi looked down at the box in her hand then, opening it and studying the solitaire as it twinkled up at her, and Cody slowly took it out and slipped it onto her finger, his eyes catching hers for a moment as she smiled at him, before looking down again. It was the most beautiful piece of jewelry she’d ever seen, and once she’d finished admiring it, feeling the weight of it on her finger as she lifted it, she realized the room had gone quiet.

  She lifted her gaze and found Cody and Harry staring at her, a slow smile spreading across Cody’s lips as he watched her.

  “What’s that for, Mom?” Harry asked as he clambered from Cody’s arms to his back, little hands looped around his neck like it was the most natural thing in the world to be climbing all over him.

  “I asked your mom to marry me,” Cody said for her. “And she said yes.”

  “Marry you? Like you’re gonna be my dad?” Harry asked.

  Lexi moved toward them, tucking into Cody’s warm chest and reaching a hand up to touch her son.

  “You’ve already got a dad, little man, but I’ll be your second dad,” Cody said. “If you’re okay with that?”

  Harry giggled and he made them all laugh. “I’m so okay with that,” he said. “Mom, does it mean I get to keep the pony then?”

  “Harry!” she scolded. “The pony wasn’t yours in the first place!”

  “Cleo?” Cody asked. “Of course! You can share him with Mia’s kids. And when you’re ready, I’ll get you your own pony. Every boy has to have a horse, Mommy, you know that, right?”

  Lexi play punched him, but he expertly caught her hand, slowly raising it and pressing a kiss to her ring finger. Lexi felt light-headed as they stood, the three of them, in the little apartment she’d loved for the months she and her boy had lived there. The place she’d been planning to leave and never come back to.

  “Do we still have to move?” Harry asked, his voice sad as he leaned over Cody’s shoulder.

  “I’m not sure,” she said, looking up at Cody. “Cody lives in New York and—”

  “No one’s going anywhere,” Cody said firmly. “We’re a family now, and that means we stay on this ranch. Unless there’s somewhere else you’d rather be?”

&n
bsp; Lexi shook her head. She was exactly where she wanted to be. “No, there’s nowhere else I want to be, Cody.”

  “Well, good.” He dropped a kiss to her lips that had Harry groaning. “Because I’m going to build you a house by our tree, and we’re going to spend the rest of our lives living on this ranch together.”

  “What about New York? Your job? Your—”

  “I’ll have to commute, and there’s this little thing called work-life balance that I might need to figure out.”

  She laughed as he caught her around the waist and kissed her again, but even with Harry begging them to stop, she let him kiss her, over and over again, his lips warm and sweet against hers and filled with so much promise it filled her heart.

  “I love you, Lexi,” he whispered.

  She sighed against his mouth. “I love you, too.”

  Epilogue

  “ARE you absolutely sure you want to build here?” Cody asked, as they stood on the hill overlooking their tree. It was picturesque, the river full of icy cold water as it ran through the valley, but the last thing he wanted was to push her into something she didn’t want.

  “Cody, stop asking me,” she said, snuggled to his side, one arm wrapped around his waist as they stood together. “I can’t imagine anywhere more beautiful to build our home. Besides, I thought I was the one in charge of the design? That means I get to decide where it’s built.”

  “But if you’d rather have our own ranch, somewhere of our own—”

  “Stop,” she said, reaching up to tug him down, her hand slipping around his neck. She kissed him, and just like that all his worries disappeared. “I love it here. I love your family, I want to be close to your dad, and this is our place. I can stare at this tree all day and remember the way we stripped each other’s clothes off and made love for the first time in the sun.”

  He grunted and ran a hand down her back, loving the way she felt against him. “I don’t need to stare at a tree to remember that.”

  Lexi laughed. “Come with me.”