The Undead Uproar

by Amanda M. Lee

  “This is Charlie Rhodes,” Jack replied without hesitation. “Charlie, this is Max Nettle. He served with Leon and me overseas.”

  “He ... you ... .” I was confused, but I forced myself to get it together. “It’s nice to meet you, Max.” I held my hand out. “You make a fabulous Marie Laveau.”

  He laughed as he shook my hand. “How did you know that’s who I was going for?”

  “I’ve read a lot about her.”

  “So have other people. I could’ve been going for any number of famous faces.”

  “Yes, but she’s the queen for a reason,” I noted, relaxing a bit at his gregarious smile. “Am I supposed to refer to you as he or she?” I blurted out before thinking.

  Instead of being angry, Max snickered. “I’m fine being a he or she. It doesn’t matter to me. I essentially live my life as two people and am comfortable as both. Others prefer being female. It was thoughtful of you to ask.”

  “Jack says I have a busy brain,” I explained. “I don’t think he means it as a compliment.”

  “Rarely,” Jack agreed, slipping his arm around me and holding it out so he could shake Max’s hand. “It’s been a long time.”

  “It has,” Max agreed. “What are you doing in my neck of the woods?”

  “Looking for zombies,” I answered for him.

  Jack sighed, his breath hitting the side of my face. “See. She does have a busy brain.”

  “Oh, well, I’m dying to hear about this.” Max took a step back and gestured toward a set of heavy drapes. “Come into my parlor. We can have privacy there ... and chicory. I believe that’s a favorite of yours.”

  “It definitely is,” Jack agreed, nudging me forward. “I think Charlie will be a big fan, too.”

  “Good for Charlie.” Max chuckled as I moved past him. “Ain’t she just cute as a bug?”

  “I’ve never understood that expression but she’s definitely cute,” Jack agreed. “She’s got a mouth without a mute button, though.”

  “That’s what makes her cute.”

  “It’s only one of the things that makes her cute ... and only sometimes.”

  “I guess I’ll have to accept your word on that.”

  IT TOOK TWENTY MINUTES TO GET settled in the back room. Max was the consummate host. He made sure everyone was settled in comfortable chairs with chicory coffee — or tea for me, because I wasn’t sure I wanted to try something new when it came to hot beverages — and he put a huge plate of cookies at the center of the table before sitting.

  “What brings you to New Orleans?” he asked, his gaze bouncing between faces. “Leon, I always see. You, Jack, I wasn’t sure I would ever see again.”

  “I always had plans to come back for a visit,” Jack countered, grabbing a cookie from the tray and breaking it in half to share with me. I gratefully took the shortbread offering and dunked it in my tea, happy to let Jack lead the conversation. “I’m working with the Legacy Foundation. Do you know what that is?”

  “Not last time I checked.”

  “It’s a corporate think tank deal up in the Northeast. It has a foothold in a multitude of different things. That includes investigating stories involving paranormal phenomenon. Our boss, Chris Biggs, is the nephew of the man who runs the foundation. He basically gets free reign to do whatever he wants ... and right now he wants to investigate zombies in the French Quarter.”

  “Ah.” Max nodded, recognition blooming. “I’ve heard the stories. People say bodies are going missing, the dead are returning to their families, and the sewers are filling with the walking dead.”

  “I haven’t heard the part about the sewers,” Jack admitted. “We’re not going down there to check. I don’t care how adamant Chris is. We’re staying clear of filthy tunnels that could cave in at any moment.”

  I looked at him as I reached for another cookie. “You’re claustrophobic. I didn’t know that.”

  His fingers brushed against mine as he took the cookie from my hand and I saw a flash. It was brief, and only one scene. I saw Jack. He was younger, hair shorter, and he looked to be trapped in an enclosed space as he struggled for breath. The image was gone almost before it had a chance to settle. “I’m not claustrophobic,” he corrected as he broke the cookie in two and took half before giving me the rest. “I just ... there’s no need to go underground.”

  Leon and Max both reacted with sympathy, which made me think they knew what had happened to him. I opted to let it go. “Okay.” I forced a smile for his benefit. “I don’t want to go underground either. Unless ... well ... if we can go back underground to find the Chupacabra again so I can prove to you I wasn’t seeing things, I would do that.”

  Jack frowned. “I don’t like being reminded of the time you fell two stories into a basement and almost died.”

  “And saw the Chupacabra,” I added.

  “You didn’t see the Chupacabra.”

  “I did so.”

  “Whatever.” Jack made a dismissive waving motion with his hand as Max chuckled. “She has a big imagination,” he explained.

  “She’s got a big heart,” Max corrected as he winked at me. “She would have to if she expected to get you to open that iron cold heart you were carrying last time I saw you.”

  “I didn’t have an iron cold heart.”

  “Not to mention the huge chip on your shoulder. It seems she’s managed to get rid of that, too.” Max’s smile was wide when it landed on me. “Honey, you’re a miracle worker.”

  I laughed. “I don’t think his chip was all that big when we met.”

  “Then you weren’t looking hard enough. As for the zombies, we’ve all heard the stories. So far, they’re just that. Stories. Do you have reason to believe they’re something more?”

  “Well ... .” Jack licked his lips and slid his gaze to me. “Kind of.”

  “One of these things showed up outside Charlie’s hotel room last night,” Leon volunteered. “She heard a noise, like someone was trying to get inside, and when she opened the door it was a guy they saw hit by a car earlier in the night. He went after her, she somehow managed to get a painting off the wall and smack him in the head with it, and then he died for what they say is a second time. I didn’t get to see him die either time, but I’m taking their word for it.”

  “You always were loyal.” Max shot him a thumbs-up but his expression was thoughtful when he turned to me. “You weren’t hurt, were you?”

  “No,” I replied hurriedly. “I’m fine. I’m tougher than I look.”

  “She is,” Jack agreed. “This isn’t the first time she’s found trouble. Still, I’m bothered by the fact that this ... guy ... managed to track us back to our hotel. We weren’t even near him when we told the police where we were staying.”

  “I see.” Max steepled his fingers. “Charlie, it sounds as if you’re the only one who saw this man before he died — perhaps for a second time. What did you see?”

  “Oh, well ... .” The question caught me off guard and I shifted in my chair.

  “It’s okay,” Jack prodded. “I never really asked you specific questions either. We were so tired after we were done with the cops that we just crawled into bed and passed out. What did you see?”

  “I don’t know.” That, sadly, was the truth. “I was dead to the world when I woke. At first I thought it was you because you have my extra key card, but then I realized that wasn’t what I was hearing.”

  “Hold up.” Jack held up his hand, annoyance obvious. “I can’t believe you thought I would just use my key card to sneak into your room in the middle of the night like that.”

  “I can’t believe you two aren’t sharing a room,” Leon countered. “What are you, like twelve? You’re so cute.”

  “I know, right?” Max chuckled.

  “We’re handling things our own way,” Jack shot back. “Mind your own business.”

  I was sorry I’d brought it up. “Um ... that’s not the important part of the story,” I reminded them. “I was confus
ed when I woke. I’d been sleeping hard.”

  “And apparently dreaming — and only dreaming — about Jack,” Leon replied cheekily.

  “Leave her alone,” Jack ordered, wagging a warning finger in his friend’s face. “Don’t pressure her.”

  “Wait a second ... is that what this is about? Are you actually being a good guy and not pressuring her?” Leon snorted, and then sobered quickly. “Wait ... you are. How did this happen? The Jack I know was a total ladies’ man who romanced every woman who crossed his path ... and on the first night.”

  “Don’t worry about it!” Jack practically jumped out of his seat. “Leave her alone.”

  I felt put on display in a way, but not to the extent Jack seemed to be worried about. “It’s fine.” I patted his arm. “They’re just messing with you. I thought that was the guy way of doing things. They don’t mean anything by it.”

  “We really don’t,” Max agreed. There was something in his eyes I couldn’t quite identify. I almost thought it was recognition. Of what, I had no idea. “We’re sorry.” He held up his hands in capitulation. “Tell us the rest of the story, Charlie.”

  “There’s not much to tell,” I said, keeping one eye on Jack as he worked overtime to put himself back together. He was angry, but I didn’t understand why. I told the rest of the story, leaving nothing out. When I finished, Leon and Max were more perplexed than ever.

  “Well, that sounds like a zombie,” Leon said finally. “I still don’t know that I’m comfortable using that word.”

  “That makes two of us,” Max said.

  “Three,” Jack muttered. “I can’t wrap my head around zombies either.”

  Max smiled at him. “At least there we agree.”

  WHEN IT WAS TIME TO LEAVE, I excused myself to use the restroom. Max was waiting for me in the hallway when I exited. He flashed a smile when he saw me, but I read trouble in his eyes.

  “What’s wrong?”

  “Nothing is wrong,” he replied quickly. “I just wanted a moment alone with you to apologize for what occurred earlier. I didn’t mean to make you feel uncomfortable.”

  “You didn’t. Jack was uncomfortable.”

  “Yes, but I didn’t realize why right away. I do now and ... I’m very sorry.” He sounded sincere, which I found baffling.

  “You don’t have to apologize. You didn’t do anything wrong.” I meant it. “Jack and I haven’t been dating all that long. We’re just not there yet.”

  “I know. What you don’t know is how ... miraculous ... that truly is. Jack has never had a girlfriend.”

  I snorted. “Please. Look at him. He’s had hundreds of girlfriends.”

  “No, he’s had hundreds of dates,” Max corrected. “You’re his first girlfriend and it’s all kinds of cute.”

  I didn’t know what to make of that. “I don’t understand.”

  “I know. But you will. One day, things will simply click into place when it’s time. Don’t rush yourselves. Things are obviously going well for the two of you. Jack is perfectly content with how things are, so don’t change yourself to try to keep up with him. He’s waiting for you.”

  I understood what he was saying and it made my cheeks burn. “Oh, well ... .”

  “And I’ve embarrassed you again.” He made a clucking sound as he patted my shoulder. “I’m sorry. That wasn’t my intention. Jack absolutely adores you. I find it ... marvelous. I don’t know that I would’ve picked you as his type, but you’re perfect for him.”

  “Oh, yeah?” I fanned my face to cool my embarrassment. “Why is that?”

  “You challenge him. You trust him. You have faith in his abilities. You’re his equal even though he tells himself he has to protect you. You’re just unbelievably cute.”

  I pressed the heel of my hand to my forehead. “This is weird to talk about.”

  “Definitely cute,” he echoed, shaking his head. “I can’t wait to see how this all plays out. I think it’s going to be amazing. As for Jack, don’t do anything differently than you’re already doing. Things will happen when they’re supposed to happen. You’ll know when it’s the right time.”

  “Okay.”

  “Also, be careful.” His tone darkened. “I don’t know what’s going on with the zombies, but I’m going to start digging for information. I don’t like the sound of any of this and I don’t know what to make of it. We’ll work together to solve it. You and Jack are not alone.”

  “We have a whole group of people. We’re never alone.”

  “You know what I mean.”

  “I do.” I beamed at him. “You’re not what I expected. I thought all Jack’s friends would be buff ego machines. I’m happy to be wrong. You’re a lot of fun.”

  He chuckled. “You’re not what I expected for Jack’s girlfriend. I’m also happy to be wrong. We’re definitely going to have a lot of fun.”

  I had no trouble taking him at his word.

  Thirteen

  We made it back to the hotel with five minutes to spare. Jack steered us toward the bar, where everybody was waiting, and introduced Leon as we sat. Everyone greeted him cordially. Laura went so far as to look him up and down like a piece of meat, which wasn’t lost on him as he gave her a saucy wink for her efforts.

  We jumped into things right away, so there was no time for flirting.

  “What have you got?” Chris asked. His tone wasn’t nearly as cold as it was earlier in the day, but he wasn’t exactly his normal gregarious self either.

  “Well, we have a little of something and a lot of nothing,” Jack replied. “We went to St. Louis Cemetery No. 1 this morning and in one of the vaults near Marie Laveau’s tomb the door was open and a body was missing. Apparently it’s a family vault. We’re getting the name.”

  I knit my eyebrows, confused. “When did you do that?”

  “When you were in the bathroom at the voodoo store. Leon has a few contacts and he managed to track down his niece, who has a map of the vaults. That particular vault belongs to the LaFleur family. The body that’s missing was a recent addition. Apparently they had one more space and he paid for it a long time ago. He was elderly. His name was Martin. That’s all we know right now. We’re waiting for further information so we can track his family.”

  This was all news to me. Apparently Jack and Leon had been busy while Max and I were discussing relationship issues in the hallway. “Oh, well, good.”

  “So ... a body was missing?” Chris leaned back in his chair, his expression unreadable. “Do you think we’re dealing with another zombie?”

  Jack grimaced. “I don’t believe we’re dealing with zombies.”

  “Because your girlfriend is the one who said she saw a zombie?” Laura asked. “I don’t blame you. I think she’s full of crap, too.”

  Jack scowled. “Because zombies aren’t real. I think something else is going on.”

  “Well, getting to the bottom of this mystery is definitely at the top of our list,” Chris said. “With that in mind, Hannah managed to get invited to the autopsy of our dead friend from the hallway last night. She couldn’t participate, but she was allowed to watch.” He turned to his girlfriend expectantly. “What have you got?”

  “I don’t know.” Hannah shrugged. “The entire thing is weird. I’ve been a witness to strange autopsies before, so I shouldn’t be surprised when things like this pop up, but this one ... there’s a lot of weird stuff to talk about.

  “First, there’s no way that our dead guy — who still hasn’t been identified — managed to get himself to the hotel, climb the stairs and then try to get into Charlie’s room. He died from massive internal organ failure. The thing is, I’m not sure the organ failure was due to being hit by a car.”

  I was understandably confused. “What killed him?”

  “He had cancer. He was riddled with it. I’m not an oncologist, but I’d estimate he’d have been bedridden at least three weeks ago. Given his age and poor health, it could’ve even been a month ago.”


  I ran the possibilities through my head. “Doesn’t that essentially mean that he was up and walking when he should’ve been dead?”

  “I don’t know about ‘dead,’” Hannah clarified. “He was very sick and didn’t have long to live. I’ve seen people with cancer linger before, but I don’t see how he was walking around.”

  “He was a zombie.” That seemed like the simple answer to me. “Zombies can walk around because they don’t feel anything. I mean ... what more proof do you need?”

  “Charlie.” Jack made an exasperated sound deep in his throat and pinched the bridge of his nose. “What else did you find, Hannah?”

  “He had weird marks on the bottom of his feet,” she replied, pulling out a photograph that made me very uncomfortable. It was obviously a shot of the dead man’s feet. They were devoid of color, and there were ugly red welts on the heel and outer rim of the top pad.

  “Ugh.” I cringed. “That is so gross. I don’t ever want to die and have people take photos of my body. Make sure that doesn’t happen.”

  Jack slid his eyes to me. “You’re not going to die. Don’t say things like that.”

  “Eventually I’ll die.” I’d never been all that fearful of death. I knew about ghosts, that our souls went on. It wasn’t that I had a death wish or anything. It was more that I recognized that death wasn’t always the worst possible outcome. “We’re all going to die.”

  “Let’s not talk about death,” Jack suggested. “You’re not going to die for a long time.”

  “We’re not that lucky,” Laura chimed in as she angled her face toward Leon and smiled.

  “You, on the other hand, can die any day,” Jack muttered.

  I knew he didn’t mean it, but I still shot him a quelling look. He was antsy this afternoon, and I couldn’t help wondering if it was because of the things Max had said. The more I thought about it, the more I realized that Jack was amped up because of the next step in our relationship. He was just as nervous as I was ... and for some reason that made me feel better. I wasn’t the only one freaking out over the next step.