by Beth Wiseman
Was that because it was awkward and rushed? Or maybe it was because, deep down, she’d known they were going against God. Whatever was holding her back now, she wanted to talk to her husband about it, to see if they could work through it. Seeing the way Beverly and Joseph looked at each other throughout the evening made Lydia want to recapture the excitement she’d once had with Samuel.
After she cleaned the kitchen, she took a deep breath and marched to the bedroom. They were a married couple with a child. Surely they could have a conversation about the way they were living and why.
She crossed the threshold of their bedroom, and then she stepped to her husband’s side of the bed. His eyes were closed.
“Samuel?” she said in a whisper.
When he didn’t answer, Lydia blinked back tears. Samuel always snored lightly when he was asleep, but he wasn’t snoring now. She took a step back. He opened one eye but then quickly closed it.
Her husband was doing to her exactly what she’d been doing to him. He just wasn’t as good at it.
Chapter 3
Beverly had her midday meal with Anna the following Monday, eager to tell her sister about the evening with Joseph. They were eating in the restaurant at Gasthof Amish Village. It was a touristy place frequented by the Englisch, but since Anna worked there, she got a discount. And the buffet was always good.
“I haven’t laughed so hard in a long time.” Beverly smiled as she recalled the jokes Joseph told. “And you know how I feel about a man who can tickle mei funny bone.”
Anna handed eight-month-old Susan a cookie from the buffet. The baby hadn’t eaten much, but she’d been quiet, and both women were thankful for that. Beverly reminded herself she needed to take Lydia the salve she’d made for her. Maybe she’d go to Lydia’s house later. She might even know what Joseph thought about meeting her.
“It’s gut to see you so happy. It sounds like Joseph made quite an impression on you, ya?” Anna grinned from across the table. Lydia’s older sister was also her best friend. Only two years apart, they’d grown up in a houseful of boys. Anna would be twenty-one in a week, and she and her husband, Emanuel, had been married for two years.
Beverly longed to have the kind of relationship Anna and Emanuel had. She’d had it with Enos, but not for very long. The Lord had taken her husband much too soon. It was hard to believe it had been over a year since he died. Beverly feared she would miss him every day for the rest of her life, but she prayed God would give her a second chance at love. She’d dated only one man since her husband’s death, and that hadn’t gone well.
“All men won’t be like Chriss.” Her sister locked eyes with her. “You know that, ya?”
She nodded as she recalled the short courtship she’d had with a friend of her cousin’s. “I know, but I still want to move slowly. Mamm and Daed—and everyone else—hope I’ll remarry soon, but I want to marry the right man. I’m worried I won’t love anyone the way I loved Enos.” She sighed, but recalling Joseph’s animated storytelling, she couldn’t help but smile. “I feel encouraged after meeting Joseph, though.”
“I’ll be praying things go well with him.” Anna winked at her before she turned to Susan. “She’s being a little angel today.”
Beverly touched the tip of the baby’s nose. “You’re such a gut girl.” She turned back to her sister. “I need to take Lydia that salve, and I’m hoping to hear what Joseph thought about meeting me.”
“Let me know what she says.” Anna’s eyes twinkled with an excitement Beverly felt. “I hope he’s the one.”
Beverly smiled. She’d had only one supper with Joseph, but she was already mildly smitten. “Me too.”
* * *
Joseph had been helping the store’s van driver deliver furniture all morning. But now he hoped to catch up with Samuel in the break room over dinner. He was breathless by the time he rounded the corner and found his coworker sitting alone at the table.
“What did Beverly have to say about me?” Joseph’s heart pounded, his mind a crazy mixture of hope and fear. He’d dated plenty of women back in his hometown, but he hadn’t found anyone he was really interested in since moving to Montgomery a couple of months ago.
“Slow down, fella.” Samuel chuckled. “We’re not in eighth grade.”
Joseph pulled a container from the refrigerator and sat down across from his friend, soaking in the air-conditioning, a perk of working for an Englisch family. “I know.” He bit into a ham-and-cheese sandwich but couldn’t help but eye Samuel’s food. After he’d downed the bite, he said, “I can’t wait to be married if it means someone will pack me a dinner like that. Mei mamm’s great, but I rarely get to bring that kind of meal to work.”
“Lydia is a gut cook.” Samuel forked one of two pork chops on his plate and plopped it down next to Joseph’s partially eaten sandwich.
“And you’re a gut friend.” Joseph lifted the pork chop and took a big bite, closing his eyes to savor the flavor. “I remember Mamm sending dinners like this when I was in school. She’d put in a little icepack. We didn’t mind eating it cold.” He tipped his head to one side. “I don’t exactly remember when sandwiches started showing up instead.” Smiling, he nodded at the microwave. “Dinner is even better when it’s hot.”
He gave his friend time to offer up any information, then grunted. “So. What did she say?”
“I don’t think Lydia has talked to Beverly.” Samuel laughed again. “It’s only been three days.”
Joseph groaned. “I know, but I really want to see her, and I’m anxious to know if she’s interested in going out with me.” He sat taller. “Hey, mei friend. Why don’t we all go on a picnic Saturday, when I get off work at noon? It won’t exactly be a double date, just friends hanging out.”
“I’ll talk to Lydia and see what she thinks. It might be too hot for Mattie.” Samuel scooped up the last of the peas on his paper plate.
“Ya, you’re right.” Joseph raised his eyebrows several times, grinning. “Maybe we could go later in the afternoon.”
Samuel smiled as he stood and tossed his empty plate in the trash can. “Maybe so.” He turned to Joseph and chuckled. “You act like this was love at first sight.”
Joseph leaned back in his chair and considered the possibility. “Maybe it was.”
* * *
Lydia paced with Mattie, battling tears of her own as her little one cried. She’d tried freezing teething rings and some over-the-counter medication for babies cutting teeth, but neither seemed to be working.
When a buggy rolled onto the driveway, Lydia prayed it was her mother and that she could leave Mattie with her for just thirty minutes—so she could go for a walk or do anything to escape her daughter’s crying.
Her mother wasn’t who stepped out of the buggy, but it might be someone even better—for two reasons. Beverly was carrying a baby on her hip, and she had a paper bag in her hand that Lydia prayed held the salve she mentioned.
Lydia met her at the door. “This must be your niece, Susan.” She was a beautiful little girl with blond hair the same color as Mattie’s. It just wasn’t as curly.
“Forgive the unannounced visit, but I thought you might need this.” She handed the bag to Lydia. Mattie had stopped crying and was focused on the small person with Beverly. “And I also thought Susan might be a nice distraction. She’s a couple of months older than Mattie, but maybe they’ll take a liking to each other.”
Lydia sat Mattie on the floor near a pile of toys. Her daughter had been sitting up by herself for only a couple of weeks, and after one good tumble and hitting her head on the wood floor, now there was a rug in the play area.
Beverly placed her niece across from Mattie.
“She’s a beautiful little girl,” Lydia said as they watched the babies eyeing each other.
“I think babies just like being around other babies.” Beverly pulled her eyes from the little ones. “But if this is a bad time, please don’t let us keep you from anything.”
�
�Nee, this is a great time, and I’m so relieved Mattie isn’t crying at the moment.” She held up the bag. “And this is?” Please let it be the miracle medicine.
“It’s the salve I told you about. Mei schweschder gave me the recipe, and I went ahead and made some for you in case you didn’t have all the ingredients.” Beverly folded her hands in front of her. Lydia wanted to rush over and hug her, but she thanked her instead. They didn’t really know each other that well.
“Please, sit.” Lydia motioned to the couch. “I just took some apple turnovers out of the oven, and I can percolate some coffee if you have time.”
“Ya, that would be great.”
When Lydia returned a few minutes later, Beverly was down on the floor with Mattie and Susan. “They seem to like each other,” she said as she stood and accepted the coffee and a turnover from Lydia. “I didn’t know if little Mattie had cousins to play with.”
Lydia shook her head. “Nee, mei only schweschder, Mary, doesn’t have any kinner. She and her husband, Levi, hope to soon, but it just hasn’t happened yet. And Samuel is an only child.” Not only were Samuel’s parents older than most of their friends’ parents, but he’d been born in their forties.
“Susan is an only child too.” Beverly took a sip of the coffee before taking a bite of the warm turnover. “This is delicious.”
“Danki. It’s mei mudder’s recipe.”
Beverly cleared her throat. “Um . . . I have something to ask you.” A flush crept across her cheeks as the corners of her mouth curled upward. “I know it’s going to sound juvenile, but I was wondering if Joseph said anything about me to Samuel.” She momentarily cringed, but the smile quickly returned.
“You liked him?” Lydia recalled how she judged Joseph by his looks when she’d first met him, a reminder that beauty truly was in the eyes of the beholder. Although being around Joseph had surely made him more attractive. He smiled a lot, he was funny, and he seemed to have a kind heart. Babies could tell those things, and Mattie had warmed up to him right away, just like she did with Beverly.
“Ya, he’s handsome and funny, and I’d like to get to know him better.” Beverly’s face turned even redder as her smile broadened.
Lydia held up a finger when her cell phone rang from the kitchen. “Excuse me. We use our phones only if it’s important, so I better get that.”
Once in the kitchen, she was surprised—and a little concerned—to see it was Samuel calling. But he’d just forgotten his wallet and wanted to confirm that he’d left it on the kitchen counter, which he had. He also asked her about going on a picnic Saturday with Joseph and Beverly. Could she ask Beverly if she wanted to go?
“If you think she’ll be interested,” Samuel said in a whisper. He was probably at the far end of the store where he got the best cell service, but there might be customers around.
Lydia peeked into the living room. Beverly was back on the floor playing with Mattie and Susan again. “Ach, I’m pretty sure she’ll be interested, although she might have to work at the bakery. She’s here right now, so if you can hold on a minute, I’ll ask her.”
Beverly’s face lit up when Lydia asked about the picnic, and she nodded right away.
“Ya, looks like it’s a go,” Lydia told her husband. “Beverly and I can discuss a time, but we probably need to go later in the afternoon, so Mattie doesn’t get too hot.”
Samuel agreed, and as Lydia ended the call, she realized she’d never been on a picnic with Samuel.
“Apparently, Joseph took a liking to you, because this was his idea.” Lydia lowered herself to the floor with Beverly and the babies, soaking up the silence. Maybe she needed to have another baby so they could entertain each other. The thought caused her stomach to swirl as she questioned again why she was nervous about being intimate with Samuel. She’d always wanted a big family.
“This will be so fun.” Beverly clapped her hands a couple of times.
The woman was simply gorgeous. How had she remained single this long? “Have you, um . . . dated a lot? I’m only seventeen, so Samuel has been my only, um . . .” She couldn’t really call him her boyfriend before they married. “He’s been the only one,” she finally said.
Beverly’s joyous expression faded as her eyes darkened. “I’m twenty, and I’ve dated a little.” She paused as she picked up a toy block and fumbled with it. “I got married right before mei seventeenth birthday.”
She had? Lydia couldn’t help but wonder if her new friend had been in a family way, too, since she’d also been young when she married. But if Beverly was single now, that had to mean she was a widow, and she hadn’t mentioned children.
Now Beverly looked enchanted. “We were so in love, and we didn’t want to wait to get married.” She paused as she looked somewhere over Lydia’s shoulder. “Maybe Gott nudged us to get married young since He knew He would call Enos home soon. Mei husband died of an infection that developed after a tonsillectomy. We were married only two years.”
Lydia brought a hand to her chest. She couldn’t imagine losing Samuel, and the moment she had the thought, she realized that she did love her husband—even though it wasn’t the kind of love she wanted. She shook her head. “I’m so sorry.”
“Enos died almost a year ago.” She rolled her eyes and finally grinned. “Everyone, especially mei parents, hope I find someone special and remarry soon.”
“Maybe Joseph will be that person.” Lydia hoped Beverly and Joseph would find true love. And maybe living vicariously through them would help Lydia understand how a real romantic relationship was supposed to be.
“I did date one man after Enos died.” She shrugged as her lips turned under. “But it didn’t work out.”
Lydia wanted to ask why, but sometimes people just weren’t meant to be together, and she didn’t want to pry.
“Where should we have the picnic?” Lydia handed Mattie her pacifier when she reached for it, amazed at how well the two girls seemed to entertain each other, even at such young ages. Mattie mostly watched Susan reaching for toys, studying them, and then moving on to whatever else was in reach.
“What about one of the schoolhouses? No kinner will be there since school isn’t in session.” Beverly’s contemplative expression bubbled with childlike enthusiasm. It was hard not to share in her excitement.
Lydia agreed. From there, they planned the menu. When they were done, Lydia said, “I’ll bring all the food, but maybe you can bring Susan since she and Mattie seem to entertain each other.”
“I’ll check with mei schweschder, but that’s a lovely idea. Are you sure I can’t bring some of the food, though?”
“Nee. Let this be mei treat.”
Lydia couldn’t recall ever going on a picnic except with her family when she was younger. This would be the first outing where she planned the menu and prepared the food herself. This would be her first picnic with Samuel.
* * *
After devotions that evening, Samuel struck up a conversation about Joseph and Beverly. “He’s excited to see her again.” He closed his Bible and put it back on the end table beside the couch.
“She’s excited, too, although . . .” His wife twitched her mouth back and forth before she went on. “I was a little surprised.”
Samuel grinned. “Because he’s a little goofy-looking?” He snickered, even though he felt bad about the comment afterward.
Lydia pressed a hand over her mouth, but Samuel was sure she was stifling a grin of her own. Finally, she said, “Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and Beverly clearly likes Joseph.”
Samuel was enjoying having a conversation with Lydia, one where they laughed and talked about someone other than Mattie. It was interesting how easily they could delve into other people’s lives and find humor but not know how to build a relationship for themselves, one that included laughter. Samuel decided to stay on course. He liked seeing Lydia smiling and laughing.
“Joseph is a gut man. He volunteers at a men’s shelter once a month, and on
most Tuesdays, he takes his grossmudder to supper. She likes pizza, and she can’t drive a buggy anymore. His parents brought her along when they moved here from Ohio, along with Joseph’s bruder and schweschdere.” Samuel shrugged. “I just like the way he’s happy all the time.”
“Maybe that’s why he and Beverly hit it off. She’s like that, too, always smiling and seemingly happy.” She paused. “But today, for the first time, I saw a part of her I hadn’t seen in the short time I’ve known her. I didn’t know she’d been married.”
Samuel’s eyes widened. “She’s a widow?”
“Ya. Her husband died from an infection less than a year ago. When she spoke about it, she got a faraway look in her eyes, and for a few moments, I thought she might cry. But then we started talking about Joseph again, and her happy mood returned.”
He shook his head, frowning. “That would be horrible to go through. I can’t imagine anything happening to you.” The words slipped out so easily, yet he couldn’t seem to communicate with Lydia about their relationship. When he looked at her, she was staring at him, intently, as though she had something important to say. He wanted her to tell him what kept them so distant. Maybe if they talked about it, they could fix it.
Then Mattie began to scream. Lydia didn’t move at first. She just kept gazing into his eyes. Finally, she jumped up, picked up the salve she’d been given earlier, and scurried to their daughter’s bedroom.
And the moment was lost.
Chapter 4
Samuel tried to stop by his parents’ house most days. Not only was it on his way home from work but he worried about them. With his mother in a wheelchair and his father’s weak heart, they didn’t get out much.
But when Samuel stopped there Thursday evening, he knew something wasn’t right.
“What’s wrong?” He stood rigid in the entryway of the house he’d grown up in, his heart hammering. His parents were creatures of habit. They always sat in the same places, the blinds were always raised, and one of them always greeted him with a welcoming “Wie bischt.”