In Real Life

by Elisabeth Warner

  Lola whimpers as if she understands what I’m saying. “Good girl,” I say sweetly, patting Lola’s fuzzy head, as I gather my thoughts. That same fuzzy head licked the wounds of my hurt during the shutdown. She comforted me in my loneliness. She was there for me when I would try turning on my phone and get a low signal message. Her soft head would appear under me as I sat on my couch and sipped tea, watching the patrol officers outside.

  “Can you thank Don for sending you to come find me? I wish you could tell me whether he was the one who sent you. Then I could know if he’s listening to us.”

  After I ask the question, Lola’s collar buzzes. I stop walking and bend down to examine the metallic voice device. The red light is green. Did I just get a new message?

  I press the button and wait for something to happen. An automated voice crackles on the other end, but I can’t make out what it says. Maybe the sender has a bad connection.

  “Well, the fact that a sound is coming out of you at all confirms my suspicion. Whoever you are, I hope to see you soon.”

  Lola whimpers as the collar buzzes again. This time I can understand the message in an autotuned voice: “Babe, it’s me. You’re not safe out there. You need to go back.”

  Don? A knot forms in my stomach. What do I say to the man who risked everything for me? Who built me an android that I destroyed? Who’s risking his life by talking to me now.

  “I’m so sorry.”

  “Me too. But we can talk about that later. Lola’s gonna take you back to the Community.”

  “I can’t go back there. Don’t you know what happened?”

  “I heard everything. I saw everything. I’m sorry I wasn’t there to protect you.”

  “I understand why you weren’t. You’re trying to protect yourself.”

  “If I went there or blew my cover, I’d put the entire Community, and the other hackers, at risk. That’s why I need you to go back. I’m going to send someone to come get you.”

  “But why can’t you come get me?”

  “Trust me. It’s all part of the plan. I hope I’ll see you soon.”

  “Me too. By the way, thanks for helping out my new friend with her TV.”

  “I knew you two would get along.”

  The static on the other end of the collar tells me our conversation is over. Tears form in my eyes as the red light stops blinking and turns off. Lola lays down on the ground as I pet her furry head.

  “Well, I guess we have to go back there, huh, Lola?”

  She barks at the sound of her name and rolls over, allowing me to rub her belly. I replay the conversation with Don in my head, hanging on every word. He knows I’m not mad at him about the affair anymore. He wants to protect me, even after I turned my back on him so many times.

  As the sun continues its descent, my heart fills with hope. Even knowing someone is on my side gives me peace. I rise to my feet and ask Lola to lead me in the right direction.

  Even though Don told me that she’d direct me back to the Community, I’m surprised when she starts walking in a straight line down the dirt road. Maybe Don also put a tracking device in her somewhere, steering her.

  My legs feel the familiar terrain underneath me from when Susan came to get me. Look for Susan. She’ll take good care of ya. Don tried to warn me that she was safe. I wish I’d learned to trust him sooner.

  I climb the hill with Lola and feel the strain of the elevation in my calf muscles. Now I know why I passed out my first day here. I didn’t have the energy or the strength to walk.

  By the time I reach the orange gate, it’s dark. Perfect. Maybe I can sneak back to my cabin without anyone knowing I was gone.

  I hug Lola close to me, hoping she doesn’t run off. My muscles tense as I sneak past the clinic, where the lights are still on. The safest place for me right now is my cabin.

  Chapter Sixty-Two

  Nelle, Tee, and June are sitting on my couch, their eyes closed in prayer. When they open their eyes, they gasp and run up to me. Fatigued, I let them embrace me and carry me to the couch.

  “How did you know I’d be back?” I ask.

  “We didn’t,” Tee says, offering me a bottle of water. “We meet in your cabin every night to pray for you.”

  “We were so worried about you.” June puts her arms around me, wetting my sweatshirt with her tears. In her embrace, I feel safe. “What made you come back?”

  I gulp down a sip of water. “My pet found me and brought me back here. I also talked to my hacker.”

  “Your hacker? How did he contact you?” Nelle asks.

  “Who’s this little guy?” June bends down and makes a face like she’s kissing the air. “Hi there, sweetie.”

  “This is Lola, my dog.”

  “Aw, what a sweet widdle girl you have.” When she rubs my dog’s fur, Lola rolls onto her stomach.

  “Did your hacker find you?” Nelle asks again.

  “He somehow sent Lola to come get me. I was able to talk to him through Lola’s collar, but the radio signal went dark after he told me what to do.”

  “Which was?”

  “Come back here. He’s sending someone to pick me up.”

  “Just you?” Tee asks. “What about the rest of us?”

  I shrug. “I don’t know. He just told me to trust him. And that’s what I’m going to do.” After my statement, the room grows eerily quiet. The three of them exchange worried glances. “What did I miss?”

  “Lin, there’s something we need to tell you.” June bites her lip as she looks at Tee and June. “A lot has happened since you left.”

  I lower my eyebrows. “What happened? Did Spark hurt anyone? Is the whole Community against me?”

  “Not exactly,” Tee says. “Everyone can tell that Spark’s a traitor, but they’re not sure what to do. Not since…”

  “Since what?”

  “Lin, Ace is dead.

  No. Ace…

  June brings me a box of tissues as I let the tears fall. Tee lets me rest on her shoulder as she bounces her growing son on the other. I’ll never hear his voice in my ear again, or feel his warm arms embracing me when I’m scared.

  “I’m sorry,” Tee says, looking up at the ceiling.

  I hold my fists up to my mouth, holding back a sob. “Was it my fault?”

  “After you went down into the underground garden, Spark and Blair came inside the house. He said he knew there was trouble when Ben’s cyst was removed. He couldn’t hear us anymore.”

  “So, he was spying on us the whole time.” My muscles clench as I think about how much I shared with my friends, how we opened up to each other about our past lives. Even Susan said it was all right. But we might’ve given him all the information he needed to find our hackers.

  “As you know, Ace attacked Spark at the clinic. When Spark came back to your cabin, Ace made some accusing threats at Spark, threatening to throw him in the brook. Spark pulled out the gun, and Ace told us to run. We locked ourselves in your bedroom and heard the gunshot.”

  Out of the corner of my eye, I see the white bedroom door, half ajar and stained with blood. His blood. He died to save the Community.

  It’s too much for me to handle. My mind’s spinning. I need to come up with my next move, so Ace didn’t die in vain. But all I can think about is his sweet lips on mine, and the fact that I’ll never see him again. “I don’t know why my hacker sent me back here.”

  We sit in silence, the heaviness of the moment speaking enough words of its own. I remember the words I read in the underground garden. Hope doesn’t disappoint.

  I pull out the piece of paper about hope and show it to my friends. As they read it, I explain about finding the underground church and having Lola meet me down there. I also tell them about the note I found on Lola’s collar.

  “Wow,” Nelle says. “There’s a church right below us? Was anyone down there?”

  I shake my head. “I have a theory that they cultivated the underground garden. Maybe they wanted us to keep it up ag
ain.”

  “I know Ace would love if we maintained it,” June says.

  “You’re right. That would be a wonderful way to honor him. The people of the underground church wrote something about the next generation reaping the harvest of the seeds that they planted.”

  “That sounds about right,” Nelle says, wagging her finger. “That reminds me of a verse in the Bible. ‘We will reap a harvest if we don’t give up.’”

  “Hm, I like that.” I put my empty water bottle on the table. “I hope that they were able to reap some of the harvest, too.”

  “Well, it’s only a matter of time before Spark discovers you’re here.” Nelle leans toward me with raised eyebrows. “Did your hacker give you advice about what to do next?”

  I play with my lips. “Susan told me that there was a ceremony where everyone has to throw stones at me while I’m tied to a pole. She said that any rule broken results in death. Especially leaving the Community.”

  Nelle and June look at each other. “Everyone?” Nelle asks.

  Acid rises to my throat as I realize the severity of my statement. If everyone has to throw stones at me until I die, so do all my friends. “Ladies, you wouldn’t…would you?”

  June pounds her fist on the armrest. “Of course not. You’re not a threat to the Community. I know that, not just because we’re friends, but because you came back. Unless your hacker somehow works for the Liberty party, which I don’t think he does, the fact that he wants you here means you can be trusted.”

  Tee sighs. “I believe you, too. You’ve been such a good friend to us. If it wasn’t for you, my baby wouldn’t be here. And you helped me get the recording device out of his ear.”

  “Okay, so we all agree that Lin doesn’t deserve to die,” Nelle interjects. “But what’s going to happen when they tie Lin to the pole and we all have to throw stones at her? Spark has a gun. He can kill us all in an instant.”

  “So, we all die too,” June says. “If her hacker brought her back here, that means she has a purpose here. Even if we all have to die.”

  Tee nods as Ben tugs on her hair. “I’m willing to die for Lin, too.”

  I force a smile. It’s sad that we have to have this conversation, but I’m happy that my friends feel so strongly about me. I’m excited that they believe in me.

  “Well, I know my mission is to be alive, so I’m not sure what I’d do.” Nelle folds her arms over her chest. “I just pray that it doesn’t have to come to that.”

  A knock on the door interrupts my conversation. My heart is in my throat as I hear Spark’s voice on the other side.

  “Open up. I know you’re in there, Lin.”

  Chapter Sixty-Three

  June opens the door for me, and an angry Spark with tangled white hair approaches me. “Lin, I’m taking you in. You’ve broken too many rules over the last few days.”

  “You have no proof,” I say. “How do you know I haven’t been sitting here this whole time?”

  “You killed Susan. You left the Community. You missed several meals. You were alone with a member of the opposite sex—”

  “I was not!”

  “It’s your word against mine, Lin. And since I’m the new leader of the Community, I get the honor of hosting your cleansing ceremony.”

  “The honor?” Tee cringes. “It sounds like you’re thirsty for blood.”

  “I’d do anything to cleanse the germs from among our perfect Community.”

  “Is that why you killed Ace?” I growl through gritted teeth.

  “Ace attacked me. I was simply defending myself.”

  “Keep lying to yourself,” Nelle says. “No one’s going to believe you.”

  “At the cleansing ceremony tomorrow, we’ll see who everyone believes.” Before we can reply, he slams the door.

  After he leaves, I run into the bathroom and throw up. My friends make me some dinner while I take a shower and wash the sweat and dirt from my body. I don’t even know how I can stomach dinner, especially since Spark is planning on announcing my death sentence to the Community.

  I wring the moisture out of my hair and slip into new clothes. My eyes avert to the red shoebox on my dresser. He’s coming back for me. No matter what I go through in the next twenty-four hours, I know he’ll be back for me soon.

  I slide the red shoebox into my duffel bag, out of sight from Spark or anyone else who could break in during the middle of the night.

  The smell of pancakes brings me out of my room and into the kitchen with my friends, who have fresh fruit and cups of iced tea to have with our breakfast for dinner. “Did you get this from the underground garden?” I ask.

  “We stocked up when we found the door under your bed,” Tee explains, passing me a plate of pancakes. “Ace had everything in there!”

  Lola chews on a pancake and licks the scraps off the floor. I teach my friends the thankful game as we take turns finding reasons to be thankful. In this moment, we need to ponder for a long time about why we should have gratitude. But as we think of the simple things—the fact that we’re still alive, our friendship, the nice weather—it takes away our fear of the unknown.

  After we finish thanking God for the food, I say a quick prayer for God to give us strength, and we dig into our pancakes.

  “How do you feel?” June asks, putting her arm around me.

  “I don’t know,” I say. “I’m not sure what I’m allowed to feel.”

  “You can feel anything you want,” Nelle assures me. “It’s normal to be afraid, or confused, or angry.”

  “How about all of the above?” I ask with a nervous chuckle.

  “Well, whatever you go through, we’ll be here with you,” Tee says. “Like we said, you’ll never be alone again.”

  “That’s right.” Nelle smiles. “We’ll be with you to the very end.”

  To the very end. Even a year ago, I didn’t know that I would be this close to death. It’s a frightening yet humbling thought, that my life will be taken from me in a matter of days, away from all my loved ones from Windsor Terrace.

  “Maybe my hacker will come get me before the cleansing ceremony,” I say, chewing on a piece of melon.

  “That’s possible,” Nelle says. “What exactly did he say to you?”

  “He told me that coming here is the safest thing to do right now.”

  “Then he’ll definitely come back,” Tee says. “Unless the outside world is worse than it was before we got here.”

  “Well, just outside of this area, there’s nobody. No stores. No cars. No houses. No people. We’re literally in the middle of nowhere.”

  “But there has to be a reason why he didn’t want to pick you up out there,” June says. “Maybe there were satellites or something that you couldn’t see.”

  “All I know is that I don’t know anything,” I say, looking down at the floor.

  My friends laugh as if I’d told them a joke, but I’m not kidding. I don’t know anything about Don’s plan. I’ve been here for several months, and I’m still as clueless as the first time I walked down that dirt road.

  “What about you?” I ask. “What would you all do if you could leave the Community? What do you miss most about home?”

  “I miss my family,” Tee says. “Ben doesn’t even know he has siblings. He has a father who I’m sure is praying for him every day.” She shakes her head. “The first thing I’d do is run home and tell my husband that his son’s alive, that everything’s okay.”

  “I hope you get that opportunity one day, Tee,” June says sweetly. “I didn’t really have much of a life back home, but since you’re all my friends now, I’d probably talk to you on social media.”

  “Would you really?” I ask. “If we all live close enough, I’d like to see you in person.”

  “Sorry, Lin, but we’re not from the elite part of the country,” Tee chuckles.

  “Then, I guess social media is the next best thing to being here in person.”

  Nelle hums as she sucks down the l
ast of her iced tea. “I’d go back to church and tell everyone about all of you. They’d be so encouraged by what God has done among us over the last few months.”

  “And he’s not finished yet,” I say. “He’s still giving us hope, even now.”

  “What would you do, Lin?” June asks.

  I smile as I say the first thought that pops into my head. “I’d quit my dead-end job and pursue a career. I’d get married. I’d have a baby and start a family.”

  “Wow, Lin. That sounds like a big change from when you first came here.”

  I chuckle. “I thought being alone was the best thing for me. It gave me the opportunity to control my environment, to feel safe. But now I know that love is the best thing, and love often requires risk. So I’m ready to risk it all again. I’m ready to embrace true connections.”

  Chapter Sixty-Four

  My friends spend the night in my cabin, encouraging me during my last day at the Community. As I struggle to sleep, I pray that Don comes for me in the middle of the night. I pray that there’s a way out of this. But as the window reveals a new day again, my heart wells up with disappointment.

  I can run away. The door to the underground garden is right under my bed. I don’t have to do this. Then again, Lola’s tag told me to await further instructions. Do they know that the Community plans on killing me today? Now would be a great time to get some further instructions.

  Nelle knocks on my door. “Rough night?”

  I nod. “What did you expect? I’m dying in a few hours.”

  She sits on my bed. “What’s on your mind?”

  “The note I found said hope doesn’t disappoint. This seems pretty disappointing to me.”

  “Dying isn’t disappointing, Lin. That’s the true meaning of hope. No matter what happens to us in this life, even death, we end up going to Heaven in the end.”

  I lean my head against the pillow, a sense of peace washing over me. “What’s Heaven like?”