by Jade Winters
Good news. I’m coming home next week.
I can’t wait to see you and the kids
It’s really made me realise how lucky
I am for what I’ve got.
Love you so much. Miss you all loads.
Got amazing prezzies for you and the kids.
Xxx
Oh my God she’s coming home. she’s coming home!
‘Good news?’
Callum’s voice brought her back to reality. For a moment she’d forgotten where she was. Maybe Kim texting was the sign she needed to knock some sense into herself.
What the hell had she been thinking? Betraying Kim like this. It was crazy.
They might be broke but they could work things out. If she went through with this it would be the end for them both if Kim ever found out.
‘Something wrong?’ Callum asked raising his eyebrows.
‘No. Well, yes…’
He looked at her questioningly. ‘Care to share?’
‘Look, Callum, I know you’re both going to hate me for this but I can’t go through with it.’
His eyes narrowed. ‘You can’t? Or won’t? Look if it’s something I said—’
‘No, it isn’t. I just can’t do it. I don’t think I’d be able to look Kim in the face again if I did. I’m really sorry. Look, I need to go to the ladies,’ she said as she rose to her feet. ‘Can you cancel the room and order me a cab please?’
‘Sure. And, Lindsay, don’t worry about it.’ He smiled warmly at her. ‘I told Rae it was a silly idea to begin with. At least we’ve had a nice evening,’ he said looking at her for confirmation.
‘I agree. I’ve really enjoyed myself.’ She bent over and kissed his cheek, grateful for his understanding. ‘I won’t be a minute.’
Lindsay headed straight for the ladies. Once inside the tastefully decorated cloak room, she stopped in front of the basin and let out a sigh of relief. Staring at her reflection, she shook her head. I can’t believe I came this close. Would she have slept with Callum had Kim not texted her? It’s irrelevant now.
Rae would be disappointed, Lindsay had let her down. They’ll find someone else. What sane person would turn down forty grand?
Once she was seated back at their table, Lindsay felt reassured and strong, as only a woman with conviction could feel.
‘I’ve cancelled the room. Unfortunately, the cab won’t be here for an hour. Bad weather conditions,’ Callum explained.
‘No worries. It will give us time to sort out where we go from here. Do you think I should be the one to tell Rae?’
Callum shook his head. ‘It would be better coming from me. Maybe I should say I couldn’t go through with it. That way, if she’s angry at anyone it will be me.’
Lindsay frowned. ‘You’d do that for me?’
‘Of course.’
Lindsay couldn’t help but think what a nice guy Callum was. Sure, he had his moments when his mood seemed to change as quickly as the weather, but overall she thought Rae had done well for herself.
‘I ordered another bottle of wine. We might as well have a few drinks while we’re waiting. What do you think?’ He grinned, turning the boyish charm back on.
Lindsay glanced down at her half-full glass of wine. It’ll be a shame to waste it. And he has been really good about me changing my mind. ‘Okay but just one more.’
He topped up her glass. ‘Cheers,’ she said, taking a mouthful.
‘Cheers.’ He took a sip of his own wine and placed it on the table. ‘So who was the text message from earlier?’
Lindsay couldn’t keep the smile off her face. ‘Kim. She’s coming home next week.’
‘I bet that’s a relief.’
‘It is. I’ve really missed her.’ Lindsay drank some more.
‘So does she know about our … baby plot?’
‘No,’ she said. ‘And seeing as I didn’t actually get pregnant there’s no reason to now.’
Callum laughed. ‘Ah so you’re good at keeping secrets.’
‘The best,’ she said draining her glass.
‘More?’
She shook her head. Tiredness was starting to set in.
‘Don’t blame you. I fancy something a little different. How about some shots?’
‘Not for me, thanks. But you go ahead.’
Callum left her alone and went to the bar. He returned several minutes later with several shot glasses on a silver tray.
He handed one to Lindsay. ‘Go on, just the one.’
‘No more after this,’ she said firmly.
‘Bottoms up.’ He grinned and knocked his back in one go.
Lindsay did the same and shuddered as the hot liquid warmed her whole body.
‘Another?’
‘No way,’ she said, declining his offer. ‘This stuff is going straight to my head.’
‘Come on, don’t be such a light weight!’ Callum egged her on to take another shot for good measure.
Lindsay’s elbow knocked the empty glass off the table, sending it crashing to the floor and drawing the attention of the other diners. Callum just waved politely and mouthed that she is celebrating. Some shook their heads; others smiled and winked.
Lindsay gripped the table with the tip of her fingers. The room started to spin. Her eyes darted around the room and she could no longer remember where she was.
Suddenly firm hands led her from the table, the grip on her forearm just a little painful as it pinched her skin. Her body was unwilling. She stumbled from the room, unable to keep control of her legs. Her eyes were half open, but she saw only flashes of people who passed her by. A pair of arms held her steady as she entered what looked like a lift. Her head lolled back.
‘Is everything okay, sir?’ a man’s voice echoed in the back of her head.
Her skull was an empty coffee tin and their voices like spoons against the sides.
‘Ssshhh,’ she swayed from side to side, amusing the two men in the lift with her. ‘I … bed,’ was all she could manage to say.
‘I know. That’s what you’ve been saying all night.’ Callum’s voice reverberated through the confined space. ‘She does this all the time … can’t handle her drink ... but she’ll be fine.’
Lindsay’s eyes fought the urge to close completely and she caught a glimpse of the porter leaving the lift when the doors opened. His uniform made him look like a toy monkey and she found it hilarious. She tried to laugh. Perhaps she did, but she wasn’t sure.
It was hard to keep her head upright and her aching brain wanted to sleep more than anything, but Callum’s incessant talking in warped words kept her conscious. That, and his hard touch as he held up her limp body from its gravitational urge.
Then they were in a room. Lindsay heard nothing but footsteps and the rustle of fabric against which she was leaning. She found it hard to say anything at all now, as she drifted off into a half alive darkness, where all she could perceive was the scent of Callum’s aftershave.
Blackness. Silence.
Lindsay came to slightly, moaning at the nausea. A cold draft below her hips made her shiver. Her feet were on the floor, but she was lying on her back on the bed. How could she be home already? This was not her bed. Her limbs were numb; she couldn’t move and was too tired to even try.
Her dress was crumpled up around her ribs and it made her extremely uncomfortable, all bunched up under her back like that. It was irritating, but Lindsay didn’t have the strength to fix it.
Someone moved briefly on the bed and then got off again. A rough grasp pinched her again and she yelped weakly. She sank into a deep sleep for a moment and it was blissful. Suddenly she awoke to her thighs being pried apart by warm, strong hands which slipped under her bare buttocks. Lindsay smiled in her delirium. She loved Kim’s touch on her naked skin. Her mind fell back into the depths of a bottomless pit.
Falling ... falling ... the dizziness enveloped her brain and flung her flaccid body through miles of warm oblivion. It was so peaceful and relaxing. Somet
hing peculiar startled her from her euphoria and once more she was on the bed in the darkness. There was a soft light in the room, but she could not open her eyes. Lindsay didn’t know if she was awake or dreaming. A hand snaked between her legs, rubbing something against the warm soft flesh of her vagina.
‘Wha … what-t ...’ she tried, but her tongue was lame and her skull weighed a tonne.
Something was wrong. In her mind she knew this was not supposed to happen. It dawned on Lindsay that she was not home and this was not her bed, but she could not recall the information she needed to ascertain where she was and who she was with. Her thoughts were just a crow’s nest of memories, feelings and thoughts, fragments of conversations and some perception of taste. Wine, vodka and something else that made her mouth very dry.
Lindsay’s head lolled to one side and she subconsciously reminded herself not to puke. Her nausea was unbearable, but she was not ready to throw up, so it just sat in the pit of her stomach, waiting. The hand withdrew, leaving her wetness ice cold in the exposure of her spread thighs. The cold provoked her nipples to grow hard and she heard a lustful groan at the sight of her stiffened peaks.
Suddenly a hot hardness pressed at the entrance of her vagina. With a forceful thrust it pried her apart and pushed itself painfully into her. Lindsay recoiled from the burning intrusion that filled her in one brutally cruel shove, but not a word emanated from her. Only a fragile whimper escaped her gaping dry mouth and above her eyes a man’s face grunted like an animal.
Callum’s face.
Then she succumbed to darkness.
Chapter Thirty
Lindsay’s eyes fluttered. She shielded them against the stinging ray of sunlight that fell across her face. Where am I? Everything looked alien to her. She sat up and a burning sensation between her legs caused her to wince. She swallowed hard. Her dress was still bunched around her waist and her underwear on the floor by her shoes. It hurt like hell when she tried to throw her feet off the edge of the bed, but she managed. Behind her Callum was stretched out, sleeping peacefully.
What the hell! Had she …? Did they …? Oh my God no, I didn’t. I couldn’t have. The wine. The shots. She only had a few. Not nearly enough to make her unaware of what she was doing. Kim, oh my God, Kim. What has he done?
Her eyes ran over Callum’s naked body, the definition of his abdomen, the chiselled perfection of his chest. The pain between her legs was terrible. She knew she wouldn’t have willingly slept with him no matter how drunk she was. There was only one way he would have got her into bed and that’s if he’d slipped something in her drink. But who would believe her? She had come willingly to the hotel and booked them in herself.
You fucking bastard. Her eyes narrowed at him. If only she had the stomach to bash his skull in right there and then while he was sleeping. Lindsay wanted to cry, but she couldn’t. All she wanted was to get home to her kids. The shame of it all buried her in guilt.
You asked for it, a voice echoed in her mind. My desperation put me in this position and it is nobody’s fault but my own.
Lindsay quietly slid off the bed, making sure she didn’t wake Callum. Painfully, she rearranged her clothing and looked for her purse and coat. Quietly opening and closing the door, she darted down the corridor toward the lift as fast as she could. She needed to get out of that building. Away from him.
Rather than order a taxi from reception, Lindsay walked out onto the street to hail one.
‘Deptford, Norton road,’ she told the driver, ‘and please get there as quickly as you can.’
A million thoughts raced through Lindsay’s mind as she travelled home, watching the people on the pavements scurry to work and to school in the pale morning sun that was soon to be swallowed up by the gathering clouds. Nausea tormented her, but she could do nothing, react to nothing until she got home. In the safety of her home she could let it all out, all the things she had to keep subdued while maintaining a brave face in public.
Lindsay paid the driver when he pulled up outside her house. She bolted into her house and slammed the door behind her before racing to the toilet where she vomited. Not only was her sickness provoked by the drugs in her system, it also came from a solid dose of humiliation she could not cope with. As Lindsay convulsed over the toilet, her tears came and she cried hysterically.
What was she going to tell Rae? If she didn’t tell her the truth she would have to face that bastard again and every time he looked in her eyes, they would both know what he had done to her. Would Rae even believe that her precious Callum was capable of such a horrid crime?
I’ll get a drink and just ... just re-lax ... just not do or say an-ny-thing, she said to herself through the sniffing and the coughing. Her throat burnt from the bile and her whole body ached. She grabbed the bottle of vodka from her bedroom drawer that had been unopened for six weeks.
Bottle in hand she ran a bath and slid into it, letting the hot water cleanse and soothe her body. Lindsay winced as the water intruded everywhere, exacerbating the discomfort even more. A hefty swig from the bottle was all that could numb the pain. As the liquid burnt its way down her gullet, Lindsay abandoned all feelings, and her empty soul became as buoyant towards life as her body became in the water—devoid of gravity, devoid of stability and absolutely devoid of hope.
Chapter Thirty-One
‘It’s been two days, Callum.’ Rae paced the bathroom floor. ‘I’m worried about her. Lindsay isn’t answering my calls, or text messages.’
‘Pass me a towel will you,’ Callum said stepping out of the shower.
She took a towel from the airing cupboard and handed it to him. ‘Have you heard a word I’ve said?’
Callum dried his chest. ‘I think the whole neighbourhood heard you.’
‘This isn’t a joke.’ Rae stepped in front of him and looked him straight in the eye. ‘Tell me again. What exactly happened that night?’
Callum threw his hands in the air. ‘Oh for God’s sake, not this again. We’ve been through this a million times.’
‘I want to hear it again. You might have missed something. It’s not like Lindsay to behave like this.’
Callum rolled his eyes as he sprayed deodorant under his arms. ‘Lindsay was acting normally throughout the evening; she drank like a fish—’
‘You never told me she was drunk.’
He gave a sigh of irritation. ‘This is Lindsay we’re talking about.’
‘Yes, but you didn’t say she was drunk the first time you told me.’
He wrapped the towel around his waist and gave himself a once over in the mirror. ‘What difference does it make?’
‘A lot. It makes sense now. She’s obviously got a hangover. You should have been more responsible. Letting her drink like that when we want her to conceive. What were you thinking?’
Now the dots were starting to connect. Lindsay had fallen off the wagon and had gone into hiding. She obviously knew Callum would tell Rae about it and thought she’d be angry and rightly so. They were trying for a baby and Rae was paying her a lot of money to give birth to a healthy one.
Callum pushed past her and crossed the hall to the bedroom. ‘I was thinking that I wanted to get the whole sordid thing over as quickly as possible.’
Rae followed him and dropped onto the bed. ‘Do you think she’s angry with me?’
He stopped searching through a drawer and turned to her. ‘Why would she be angry with you?’
‘For asking her to cheat on Kim.’ Rae still remembered the look on Lindsay’s face when she suggested she sleep with Callum. It had been an unfair move on her behalf, but they both had something the other wanted. Not that that made her feel any less guilty.
‘You didn’t put a gun to her head.’
‘Maybe not, but I made her an offer she couldn’t refuse.’
He turned back to selecting his clothes. ‘It was her choice. If she feels guilty now, tough. But to be honest she was quite eager to get it over with, which surprised me. I thought she wou
ld’ve been a little apprehensive. I certainly was. But nope, not her, she was—’
‘All right, all right, I don’t need to hear all the gory details thanks. It’s bad enough knowing it happened in the first place.’
‘You asked.’ He quickly dressed in his Armani suit and shoes. ‘So aren’t you going into work today?’
‘No. I’m working from home. I have to finish my design before I go in and do the presentation.’
He gave his face a quick spray of aftershave and walked over to Rae, planting a kiss on her cheek. ‘I’d better be off,’ he said. ‘I’m meeting a potential client who wants me to run their portfolio, so I might be a bit late, all right? Call me and let me know if you get hold of Lindsay.’
‘I will.’
An hour after Callum left, no matter how hard she tried to concentrate on the job at hand, she couldn’t stop thinking about Lindsay. She needed to see her. And there’s no time like the present.
Rae fed Bourbon before hopping in her car and driving over to Lindsay’s. When she pulled up outside, the front door appeared more decrepit than it normally did and the modest garden was full of weeds. Had it always looked like that or did it only seem this way because she hadn’t been there for such a long time?
The windows were shut tight and the curtains didn’t stir when she knocked.
‘Lindsay! It’s me. Open up. If you don’t answer I’m going to call the police,’ she yelled through the letterbox. ‘Come on, what’s the matter? Hangover?’
Rae hammered on the door with the side of her fist. ‘Lindsay! Please open the door!’
It was in the middle of the school day, so she knew the kids wouldn’t be home. Looking around in case Lindsay was coming up the road, Rae walked down the crooked path, stepping over the weeds. For some reason she turned, and that’s when she saw Lindsay standing at her living room window, still wearing her pyjamas. In her hand she held a glass. No betting what’s in that.
Rae ran up the path and gestured for Lindsay to open the door. After a few seconds Lindsay disappeared from view, then the front door slowly opened.