Facing Us (Kids of the District #1)

by Nicci Harris

  They said they’d protect her.

  The boy turns his stare to the window and watches the outside world. The same world he is both desperate and terrified to see. He loves looking at the sky. He hasn’t stopped since the nurse opened the window when the big hand was at the ten and the little was at the seven. The man takes a seat on the visitor’s chair, and shuffles to make himself comfortable. The boy has watched that spot for days. It’s always been empty, until now.

  “You have very green eyes, Deakon,” the man says, and then coughs awkwardly. “You know what, Deakon. I’m not sure what you remember, but if you want to talk… If you want to talk about it, well, you can talk to me. It’s what I do.” He chuckles, and the boy flashes a quick look at him. “I have two little girls. They both talk my ears off. I’m an excellent listener.”

  The man waits patiently while the boy scowls at the sky, his face cold, his thoughts wrestling with one another, wanting company but hating the kind he has recently received. Adults lie, he thought to himself. They are all liars.

  The man starts to talk again. “The nurse told me that you haven’t spoken to anyone since yesterday. Is that true?” He waits for an answer but knows he won’t receive one. “Well that’s okay. Like I said, I have two little girls that do plenty of talking. Felicity is only a few years older than you; she is eleven. Cassidy is only five, and she’s here today. Would you like to meet her?”

  The man watches the boy’s face intently, and the boy tries hard not to look intrigued by his offer.

  I would like to meet them. Kids don’t lie. Even when it’s hard. Even when it hurts.

  The boy’s eyes move to the man, and he can no longer keep his interest a secret. Liz was four when he met her, and he can count to five, so he understands that is nearly half his age. He misses her. The boy nods, just once.

  The man smiles. “Okay, but first, can you do me a favour? Cassidy is still very little, and she needs someone to look after her. Do you think while I go to get a coffee, you could watch over her?”

  A flutter of excitement fills his chest, and the allure of importance causes him to nod again, but he still doesn’t smile.

  The older man, who the boy doesn’t hate as much as the others, stands and says, “I will get her.”

  Once the man is outside, the boy jolts up and waits, peering through the open doorway. A few short moments pass, and the man walks in, tailed by a small blonde girl. The boy sucks a quick breath in.

  She is smaller than Liz.

  Blonde hair like Liz.

  I like her.

  The girl grins, showing her gapped teeth, bright and white. Her cheeks rosy and full of character. The boy’s eyes widen when she rushes over to him, crawls on the bed and wriggles over to his side, curling her knees up and facing him on the pillow they now share. The boy stares at her hazel eyes that are filled with laughter and courage and confidence, and he wishes he’d seen that look on Liz. The girl’s knee presses against the boy’s, and he wants to move it away, but doesn’t. The girl giggles.

  The boy turns to look at the man and tilts his head when he notices the man staring back with a strange expression. That is when the boy realises, he is smiling. He is smiling at the little girl.

  “I always wanted a brava,” the little girl says.

  I like her.

  TWENTY-FIVE: Blesk

  There have been defining moments with Konnor that will stay with me forever, despite the blessing and curse of time and how it can conveniently erase significant memories from my mind. I definitely won't forget the chilling expression on his face when he said, “Ben and Renee Slater paid your father to take me.”

  He’s seething. His cheek muscles are dancing under his skin as he rushes up the staircase towards his dad’s room. With his fists pumping at his side, his whole back almost out-of-worldly rigid, his feet take him as fast as possible to the top floor. The thundering of his heels hitting the floor as he walks the hall is inundating.

  I chase after him. “Konnor, wait!”

  I feel like I’m going to break, from his pain. His whole world is crumbling… again. I barely notice how much I’m crying, or how wet my face is, as I follow him to the top floor. He swings open a door, walking straight up to a wide-eyed, startled Ben, and slams the bank statement down onto his desk.

  “Fucking explain that!” he growls, livid.

  What happens if Ben did pay off my father? Shouldn’t we be calling the police, preparing for some kind of retaliation to the truth being unveiled?

  Ben stands. “Son, what is going on here?”

  “Don’t fucking call me ‘son’.” Konnor sneers and flings his arms around in an attempt to eliminate some tension clawing at them. “Why have you been lying to me?”

  Ben looks at my alarmed face, and then back to Konnor, who seems to have grown taller somehow, his anger manifesting itself in his physical presence. “Explain!” he yells, pointing to the statement. Konnor is pacing, unable to keep still. He prowls the room, scowling at Ben as if he were prey. Every little noise, every little creak from the air escaping the wood beneath his feet, every little flap from the document, seems to be heightened. He is on the edge of a complete mental breakdown. His eyes are barely slits, and I have never seen him look less like Konnor.

  I soften my stance. “Konnor, ple—”

  He spins to face me, clutches my shoulders, and stares down at me. “Duch, if you need to leave, leave now… there is nothing left to restrain me.” The broken boy looking back at me chips at a piece of my heart. He releases me and turns back to his dad. “Answers, now!”

  My heart races.

  Ben pulls his glasses up his nose, looking fretful and disorientated. He takes his eyes off Konnor and peers down at the statement that is now in his hands. He mouths silently while he reads until a word transforms his face.

  Realisation?

  Devastation?

  Perhaps both…

  He closes his eyes and grips the paper, white knuckled, crinkling and ripping the parts enclosed within his fist.

  He groans under his breath. “Nerrock.”

  The negative energy pouring off Konnor is tangible. Ben’s eyes fly open and find me, caution flashing within them. He doesn’t know my involvement in all of this, and more than likely has been keeping this secret from everyone. For how long?

  “Blesk, you shouldn’t be here for this,” he states, curtly.

  Every part of me but one wanted to run, to flee like I always do. But my heart and love for Konnor kept me rooted to my spot.

  Konnor jolts towards Ben warningly, pointing at his chest. “Don’t talk to her. Don’t you dare even look at her. She stays as long as she wants!”

  He glowers at Konnor. “You want her to know everything, then?”

  “She knows more than you do!” Konnor hisses.

  Ben’s eyes dart hesitantly between us, before he agrees, “Fine. Everyone sit and I’ll explain.”

  Konnor huffs. “You don’t get to make demands now. Tell me why you have been lying to me. Tell me what that means.” Konnor motions towards the document laying on the expensive jarrah office desk. Someone puts their hand on my back, and I jump. I cover my face, everything is so intense right now, and making me fear for everyone involved. I feel like at any moment, I may need to rush over and pry Konnor off his own father.

  A person behind me wraps their arms around my shoulders protectively, and I catch a glimpse of blonde hair.

  “Everything okay in here?” I hear Jaxon ask sternly. “Should I take Blesk away?”

  Konnor turns to Jaxon. “No, Jax, she should stay. I want her to stay.” He looks at me, or rather, the person wearing Konnor’s face looks at me. “Do you want to stay?”

  I want to suck it up.

  Be strong for Konnor.

  I nod. “Yes.”

  “Mind if I stay?” Jaxon asks, taking a seat and positioning himself in a manner that presents his question as more of a statement.

  If things get out of contro
l, I know I can count on Jaxon to step in. He pulls me down onto his lap and holds me there as I sob quietly. Konnor eyeballs us momentarily, and then nods.

  Jaxon strokes my shoulders with both big hands, and subtly tries to soothe me. “You okay, B?”

  “Yeah, it just hurts, seeing Konnor so lost,” I murmur. “Where’s Elise?”

  “She sent me up to check on you,” he whispers into my hair. “She doesn’t want to intrude.” Konnor eyes us while we covertly talk to each other.

  Ben rubs his hands together, and then places both palms on the desk in front of him, stabilising himself. “Konnor, what do you remember why Dustin Nerrock gave you up for adoption?” he asks cautiously.

  Konnor scoffs and scowls as he turns to look at Ben. “I have a better idea. Why don’t you just talk. Tell me what I know or what I don’t.” There is not even a glimpse of warmth in Konnor’s voice or eyes. I hear someone suck a sharp breath in behind me. Konnor’s face crumbles when he sees who it is.

  “What’s going on?” Cassidy asks from the doorway. “Why are you yelling at each other?”

  Konnor walks up to Cassidy. “You should leave, Cass.”

  Ben stands and quickly approaches his daughter, causing Konnor to noticeably stiffen.

  “Cassidy, sweetheart, this is Konnor’s business,” Ben presses. “It isn’t something you need to be involved in.”

  Her narrowed eyes focus on Ben, and a lethal expression transforms her face. “If it’s his business, then it’s mine.”

  “Sweetheart, it’s—” Ben begins.

  “No,” she snaps. “I’m not leaving until I know why my two favourite people are yelling at each other.” She turns back to meet Ben’s anxious face, and the severity in her eyes is not to be ignored. Ben nods and then moves back to his desk, before almost falling on to his chair. He looks like a man whose whole world has just permanently shifted off its axis. He looks the epitome of destroyed.

  Cassidy crosses her arms and leans on the door frame, challenging Konnor to object with her uncompromising stare.

  Konnor tilts his head, and I see the slightest smile creep onto his face. “Fine, Cassidy.”

  Ben clears his throat, and we all acknowledge that as an attempt to gain our attention.

  “So, you don’t want me to ask questions, Konnor. That’s fine. But then I can’t distinguish what information you have, and so I’m going to just lay it all on the table, and between the two of us we can sift through the pieces and hopefully come out with a puzzle that looks like a picture. I went to school with your mother, Madeline. I’m yet to meet a woman who could summon the kind of infatuation that woman could. She was wild and intriguing and sharp as a razor, with the biggest green eyes and a strange mind. But she was also very insecure and often troubled. She thought too much, and that always led her to the horizon, looking for something more.” He looks down at his desk, moving the paper under his fingers.

  “She married Nerrock not long after high school. They had a son.” Ben’s brows furrow. “They looked beautiful together, and their son was picture perfect. It wasn’t until later that these rumours started to circulate. You all know what The District is like with gossip. Well, the rumour was that Deakon Nerrock . . .” his voice falters and he peers over at Konnor. “That you weren’t Dustin’s son.

  “Now, Dustin’s family has a lot of money. They are one of the founders of The District and are deeply rooted in Catholicism. Adultery was completely reprehensible. People loved the rumour. I mean, Dustin and Madeline were political celebrities and the envy of everyone. Their love, life, and every moment caught on camera, and plastered all over The District. Which made what happened even more impressive. Because, Christ, the whole world watched them, and yet this happened right under everyone’s noses. You were taken. Missing.”

  Konnor leans against the wall; the aggression has left him. Without the adrenaline that had made him a giant, he was now rendered to a shell. He takes one fist in his hand and cracks his knuckles. I don’t know how to help him.

  But I can try…

  I stand and wander over, slouching against the wall to his side and tilt my head to look at his sad profile. He turns to look at me and I see defeat.

  Ben continues, “I’d be lying if I said I liked Dustin, but I never thought he’d go so far as to have a child kidnapped. I thought he might, well . . . I worried about your mother’s safety, but not yours. You were just a child. Who would hurt a child? Especially not you, the golden child of The District.” He shakes his head. “I hadn’t realised how far he went until now.”

  My chest flutters, feeling lighter than it should. Ben looks distressed, and his face twists with anguish before he speaks again. “I don’t know for sure, Konnor. I have no proof. But if this statement is true, then someone paid that man to take you.”

  A small gasp escapes Cassidy.

  “And I know in my heart that it wasn’t Madeline, so that leaves . . . Well, Dustin and Madeline’s account.”

  “That’s bullshit, such bullshit. Money came from that fucking account for my tuition! How’s that possible? Answer that question!” Konnor presses his forehead against the wall and groans. “I saw it, Ben,” he says to the plasterboard. “The invoice was clearly made out to the university for my tuition.”

  “Konnor, your mother handed the rights to that account over to me a few weeks before she died. She said it was for you and you alone if you were ever found or ever returned. That money would have gone to Dustin’s other children, his future children, and she knew she didn’t have much time left. So, I have been using the funds for your tuition and for anything else I see fit. We didn’t need the money, of course, but it was important to Madeline that it go to you.”

  “You loved her,” Konnor states, turning toward us and fixing his emerald eyes on us all. He presses our shoulders together, before whispering to me, “I just need to feel you next to me.”

  I lean more of my body weight on him.

  Ben peers at Cassidy, hesitantly. “I love your mum, Cassidy, but, yes, Konnor, Madeline was my first love.”

  Konnor considers this information for several seconds, hope flashing in his eyes. “Okay, so are you my dad? I mean are you my biological dad?”

  Disappointment washes over Ben’s face as he regretfully shakes his head. “No, Konnor. I wish I was. You’re my son, but you’re not my blood. I’m sorry. I don’t know who is. She never told me.”

  That fleeting sparkle leaves Konnor’s face and he breathes out. “So, you two had planned my adoption? Before they even found me? That’s such crap.”

  Cassidy shakes her head, adamantly. “That makes zero sense. This sounds like fricking B.S, dad. When kids go missing and they aren’t found for four fricking years, don’t people just, kind of,” she looks around apologetically, “assume they’re dead?”

  “Madeline never gave up hope, not for a second. I don’t know if she suspected foul play because she never told me. We very rarely spoke Konnor; we never discussed the adoption. I received a letter in the mail one day, and it just said that I was entrusted to make sure you received the money if you were found, or that it went to her charity if you weren’t.” His eyes drop to the desk, and unmistakable sadness flashes across his face. “It was from a lawyer. She didn’t even send it herself.”

  Then the look is gone, and he’s back to staring at Konnor.

  “I’m not sure if you have heard about this, but Madeline started a charity for you. Nerrock Missing and Beyond. It is for lost children and their families. This is your legacy, Konnor. If you were never found. If you were just… gone. All the money would have been donated in your name. That was Madeline’s wish. Well, that was what the letter said.”

  “You never tried to talk to her?” Konnor presses. “Face-to-face?”

  “Of course I did,” he states curtly.

  I don’t like his tone, but given the circumstances, I understand it.

  Ben sighs. “I was completely disconnected from her. No one would let me sp
eak to her.”

  “Did she know?” Konnor asks. “Did she know Dustin had something to do with my disappearance?”

  Ben holds his hands up calmingly. “Slow down. Firstly, we don’t know he did for sure. We are just speculating here, and only because you came in here, guns blazing. But since we are, I can admit it crossed my mind. It was very peculiar that months after the rumours of your legitimacy as a Nerrock began, you went missing.”

  Konnor huffs disapprovingly. “She stayed with him anyway?”

  “Even if she did suspect him, you don’t divorce people like Dustin Nerrock. It’s too… dangerous,” Ben states, and his tone is strangely evasive.

  I watch Cassidy as she absorbs this information, and I get the feeling she won’t take kindly to him lying to Konnor. Or lying to her. Our eyes meet momentarily, and then hers bounce back to Ben. I can’t read her.

  Konnor shrugs. “I don’t understand.”

  Ben stretches his hands up and clasp them behind his head. The leather of the chair creaks beneath his shifting body. “I know you don’t,” he sighs. “Because I have worked very hard to keep you kids out of that world. The District streets are run by The Families, and the whole structure is corrupted. They are just dangerous company to keep, and even more so to marry into.”

  Jaxon’s eyes widen. “So, what, like the mob?”

  “Something like that,” Ben admits cautiously.

  “And Nerrock is involved?” I ask, glancing between Konnor and Ben.

  “Well, he would deny it,” Ben confirms. “They are just businessmen, Blesk.”

  Konnor takes a few methodical steps closer to Ben. His tone drops as he says, “Are you involved with them?”

  Ben looks offended. “God, no!”

  My breath catches. “Is my… I mean, the man who took Konnor, was he involved?” I ask, not really considering my question before the words escape my lips.