by Fox, Cathryn
“Drop what?” she asks, as my insides turn to ice. Ivy has venom in her eyes, and whatever she’s about to say or do, it’s not going to bode well for Ella. With my protective instincts kicking into high gear, I pull Ella to me.
“You two disgust me,” Ivy spits out and stomps from the room. “Get dressed and get out of here. Both of you.”
I jump from the bed, and gather up our clothes. We both dress quickly, hurry downstairs and find Ivy pouring wine into a glass. “You’re still here?” she asks, her words high pitched, and laced with anger.
“Drop what?” Ella asks, not about to let this go, and while we need to get to the bottom of matters, I’m afraid Ella’s going to get hurt in the process.
“You’re such a fucking little bitch. I’m so sick of you,” Ivy says, as wine sloshes over the rim of her glass.
“She’s been nothing but good to you and Piper.”
She gives a humorless laugh. “And don’t forget you, Landon. She’s obviously been very good to you. I guess you haven’t been fucking me all this time because you’ve been fucking goody-two-shoes.”
“I haven’t been fucking you, because there’s nothing between us, Ivy. You honestly can’t say there is.” I rub the back of my tight neck. “I can’t even wrap my brain around us together. In all the years in college you never paid me any attention until I met Ella. I have no idea why you’re holding on to this, or me. Is it because of Piper?”
She takes a big drink of wine, and my insides tighten. I’m honest to God worried about her mental health. There’s fire in her eyes, and her hand is gripping her glass so tightly, I’m afraid she’s about to become unhinged, I can’t help but worry she’s going to have some sort of breakdown. Has she always been this unstable, and I’ve been so preoccupied with other things I haven’t noticed?
Ignoring my question, she glares at Ella. “The way you looked at Landon, and the way he looked at you. Disgusting. You got what you deserved, sister.”
Ella slowly sinks down into a chair as the blood drains to my feet. “What are you talking about?” I demand.
“Sweet little virgin, thinks she can wave her innocent snatch in front of all the guys and have them come running.” Her smirk raises the hair on the back of my neck. “Cameron was supposed to fix that.”
I grip the back of the chair hard enough to break it as the pieces fall into place. “No,” I groan, a low tortured sound rising from the depths of my throat. Ivy set Cameron up to fuck Ella? I can’t be right. I just can’t be.
Ella swallows so hard and loud I’m sure the neighbors can hear it. “You…you wanted Cameron to hurt me?
She waves a dismissive hand. “He wasn’t supposed to hurt you, just deflower the virgin.” She shakes her head. “You even screwed—or rather not screwed—that up.”
“I wasn’t a virgin, Ivy,” Ella says, sitting up a bit straighter, trying to present strength when this has to be hurting every fiber of her being. “The night you crawled into Landon’s bed, I slept with him first.”
Her face falls, her blue eyes wide and wild. Clearly she didn’t know that I was with Ella first. “That’s not true.”
“It’s true. Landon took my virginity at the party. He caught me snooping in his room, and after sex, I snuck out. I forgot my phone and when I went back, I found you in bed with him. What I want to know is why you crawled in bed with him in the first place, especially if you knew we liked each other?”
“You didn’t belong there.” My God if looks could kill, Ella would be six feet under. “For the first time, I had my own friends, could shine without you always stealing my thunder.”
“I never stole your anything.” Ella shakes her head, the pain in her eyes raking my insides raw. “I can’t believe this. I can’t believe you went after Landon because you knew I liked him.”
Before I can interject, Ella puts her hand on my arm, and her voice is low, so goddamn tortured when she asks, “Why, Ivy? Why? I’m your sister.”
“My sister!” She makes a face like she just sucked on something distasteful. “The only thing you are is a fucking cunt, Ella. Stepping into my territory with Landon, making every member of the team love you, even after you called them names. Then you come to the party all sorry and sweet. Please. You had to learn a lesson.”
“Your territory?” I spit out, barely able to see through the anger pulsing behind my eyes. How could she set out to hurt her own sister? How did I not see any of this?
“That’s right, and I had to show her what happens when she crosses the boundaries. She had Mom and Dad, always the favorite, always so goddamn smart and sweet. She wasn’t coming in to my territory and taking over. I had to do something about that.” Ivy glares at me.
“You figured if Cameron fucked her, I wouldn’t want her?”
“I know the game you guys play.” She focuses in on Ella, a smirk on her face, like she really wants to hurt her even more. I’m not sure that’s possible, though. “Did he tell you he liked to fuck virgins, Ella?”
“I know all about the freshman game,” she answers quietly.
“You thought I liked her because she was a virgin?” I ask, unable to wrap my brain around any of this. I don’t give her time to answer. I already know the truth. “So what you’re saying is, you wanted to put Ella in her place, make her pay for trying to invade your territory?” I do finger quotes around the word territory.
She snorts. “That beating you guys gave Cameron, that cost me big time.”
Is she fucking serious right now? She and Cameron were working together to destroy her sister? “Why all the way to living together, and wanting an engagement, Ivy? If you never loved me, why go through with it?”
She gives a casual shrug. “I was pregnant, you were going to be a good provider and give me everything I needed. But you certainly failed in the bedroom department, which is why I had to get my fucks elsewhere.”
Her words hit like a slap, and Ella covers her mouth, tears filling her eyes. I put my hand on Ella’s shoulder and this seems to fuel Ivy’s rage.
“Speaking of Piper, you’re a shitty father.”
“He’s not a shitty father,” Ella snaps back, quickly coming to my defense.
Ivy shrugs again, and says, “Not that it really matters.”
My blood runs cold and I suspect she chose those words carefully, wanting to hurt me. “What the hell is that supposed to mean?”
“She’s not yours anyway.”
I stumble backward, the room going blurry before my eyes. “That’s not true. She’s mine, Ivy. She’s mine. She’s my goddamn heart.” Rage builds inside me, until I’m seeing red. “Don’t you dare try to take her from me.”
Ivy laughs almost hysterically and takes a sip of wine. “Take your whore and go. Piper isn’t yours and you’re never going to see her again.”
“She’s mine.”
“Didn’t you ever wonder where the red hair really came from? Which jock could be her real father?”
I take a step toward her, and Ella stands between us. “Let’s go,” she says.
“That’s right, get out of here.”
I shake all over, like I’d just taken a tumble in the dryer. “Piper is mine.”
“Get a paternity test if you want. Won’t change the fact that she’s not yours.”
I try to breathe, but my lungs are so damn constricted I can’t seem to fill them. “Ivy, please don’t do this. Don’t take her from me.”
Ella holds me and I swear to God if she wasn’t helping me stand right now, I’d fall to my knees. “Landon, let’s go.”
With my heart pounding hard against my chest, Ella grabs her purse and my suitcase, and leads me outside, and we both blindly walk to Ella’s car. “I’m the father, Ella. I have to be.”
“We’ll get this straightened out,” she says, and I sense she doesn’t think I am the father. I walk her to the passenger side, and open the door for her. Before she gets in, she wraps her arms around me, and we hold on to one another.
She finally breaks from the circle of my arms and slides into the car. I walk around to the driver’s side, get in and start the car. I stare straight ahead, not knowing what to do next.
“Let’s go to the farm,” Ella says. “I want to talk to my parents.”
I nod, and back out of the driveway. We mostly remain quiet the entire drive, but our hands continue to touch. Many, many hours later, as the sun begins to rise on the horizon, we pull into the farm. We both sit there for a long time, staring at the farmhouse until it’s drenched in sunlight.
“Okay, let’s go do this,” Ella says with a fast intake of breath.
I exit the car, circle it, and take Ella’s hand. She gives me a reassuring smile, but I’m not sure anything is ever going to be okay again. I can’t believe the lengths Ivy went to just to hurt her sister.
We climb the stairs, and as soon as we reach the porch, the door opens, and Ella’s mother stands there, an anxious look on her face.
“Mom,” Ella says and when her mom opens the screen door, Ella breaks down. I exchange a worried look with her mother as she leads us to the old farmhouse kitchen, and we sit at the table. David comes into the room, takes one look at us, and fine lines crinkle around his eyes as he too displays worry.
He steps up to the counter. “I’ll make some coffee.”
“Lots of it,” I say.
Once the coffee is made and we are each cradling a cup, Ella tells them everything, and I mean everything. Right from the first time I took her to my bed. But her parents sit there and listen, no judgement on their part and when the truth is finally out there, David and Corinne exchange knowing glances.
“Mom?” Ella says.
Her mother takes Ella’s hand and pats it. “None of this is your fault. Who you love is not your fault, but who you hurt is.”
“I never meant—”
“I’m not talking about you, dear. I’m talking about Ivy. She purposely hurt you two.” Another glance between David and Corinne.
“What are you not telling me?”
David refreshes Corinne’s coffee and says, “We’ve always gone out of our way to make Ivy feel special. Ever since she was a child, she was jealous of you. She started acting out, acting up, for attention. We gave it to her, thinking it would help. We’ve not always made all the right decisions, but you and Ivy were so different. She resented you being the teacher’s pet, always coming home with the high grades. She made up for it by being louder, flamboyant…extra.”
Ella stares at her mom like she can’t believe she just used the word extra. “I had no idea,” Ella says. “I stood back, happy to let her have the limelight.”
“The more you retreated, the more you gave it to her, the angrier it made her. She didn’t like that you weren’t envious of her the way she was envious of you.”
Ella shakes her head, her eyes wide and sad. “I didn’t know any of this.”
“We thought she’d outgrow it in college. She always thought you were our favorite, and when you got a scholarship…”
“She didn’t like that,” David says. “So, we paid her way, and she got into the best sorority. We thought all that would make her feel special, but obviously it didn’t.”
Ella looks down, and my heart aches for all she’s going through. I can’t imagine the pain, the anger, to be hurt by someone she’s always stood by, always loved.
“We need to get her help, Mom,” she says, her words rushed and anxious. “She needs to be there for her daughter, and I want Ivy happy and healthy, and I want her to live a long life, and find someone who will love her and support her the way she needs. She’s family, and I want us all to be a family, no matter the past. I just want to move forward to a better future.”
I breathe deep, even though it hurts my chest, because what I’m seeing here, the love, compassion and empathy for someone who hurt her deeply, is the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen. But I shouldn’t have expected anything different. Ella is one of a kind, and she’s mine. I’m the luckiest guy in the entire universe.
“I’m sorry I couldn’t be that guy for Ivy,” I pipe in quietly.
David shakes his head. “We don’t blame you for any of this, son. This is not your fault, or yours, Ella. Ivy needs help. We’ve known it for a long time, we just hoped with you both on different paths in college, things would get better. It was our responsibility to get her help and we didn’t. We will now, though.”
“From the first time I saw you both together here at Thanksgiving, I could feel the love between you two,” Corinne says. “Then the baby…”
As her words fall off, Ella begins crying into her hands and with my heart pounding like a drum in my chest, I step behind her chair, and hug her. Her mom and dad give me a warm smile.
“We’re going to get her all the help she needs, Ella,” her mom says as she puts her hand on Ella’s arm. “I just wish we would have done it sooner, before she really hurt you.”
Ella sniffs. “She said Piper wasn’t Landon’s.”
“She is, she has to be,” I whisper, my own tears threatening.
“She’s going to try to keep her from him. I just want us to all be a happy family.”
I might be in love with Ella, but despite everything Ivy has done, I still want her healthy and well, and I want us to all somehow figure out a way to be a family. If it’s what Ella wants, it’s what I want too.
“We can have a paternity test done.” David eyes us.
“No, she’s mine. I don’t need a test to prove it.”
David nods at me. “Why don’t you both go get some sleep?”
“I should go back,” Ella says quietly.
“I’ll go,” Corinne says as she stands. “I’ll stay with her until we can get her the help she needs.”
“You’re not going alone, Corinne,” David says and puts his arm around his wife.
“Thank you both,” I add, as Ella sags against me. “But I should go…Piper.” Worry worms its way through my veins.
“She loves Piper, Landon,” Ella reminds me. “If I thought Piper was in any jeopardy, I never would have left.”
“I love her, too.” I hug Ella to me. “She’s everything to me.”
“I know she is. You’re a good dad,” she says, and I know Ella loves Piper as much as I do. She loves her sister too, and would never in a million years do anything to hurt her, despite everything Ivy’s done.
I breathe her in. “Maybe I shouldn’t have said anything to you. Maybe I shouldn’t have made love to you last night. Maybe I ruined everything between you and your sister, me and my daughter.” I take a shaky breath and add, “You and me.” I inch back and my heart shatters as tears spill from Ella’s eyes. Fuck, I don’t mean to hurt her, but having her in my life as a friend is better than not having her at all.
“You didn’t ruin everything. It obviously wasn’t good between you and Ivy or me and Ivy. She’d written off our relationship years ago. But we’re going to make this right, Landon. We have to.”
What if we can’t, though?
What if I lose the two women who mean the most to me in the whole world?
More importantly, what if Ella does?
25
Ella
Five Months Later:
I kick off my blankets and stare at the ceiling, much like I do every morning since Mom and Dad have been getting Ivy psychiatric help. They’re with her this weekend, and according to them, she’s doing much better, but she’s yet to speak to me, despite all my calls and texts.
The hardest part of this is not knowing who Piper’s father is. Landon doesn’t want to take the test. I get it. He’s afraid, and in his heart, Piper is his. He hasn’t seen her since that night Ivy walked in on us, and the only times I get to see her is when Mom and Dad babysit her at the orchard. A week after that night when we drove here to talk to my parents, Landon left for Atlanta, and only returned home two days ago for Christmas break.
We spent most of the last two days in bed, and when we w
eren’t wrapped up in one another, we talked, walked the orchard, and fell deeper in love. All the while we worried about Ivy and Piper. Many more things make sense though, things like Cameron, and what he said about Ivy being poison, and how he was taking Landon’s virgin and that was all I needed to know. He didn’t tell me that Ivy had put him up to it, but when I look back, it makes sense, especially the way he exited my life as quickly as he entered it.
“Hey,” Landon says from beside me. His hands seek mine and he tugs me to him. I collapse on his chest, and press my ear to his strong heartbeat. “Happy Christmas Eve.” He places a soft kiss onto my forehead, and my body warms with all the love I have for him. Just the other day, he asked me what I wanted for Christmas, but he can’t give me my family around the tree, happiness and laughter as we open gifts. Just like I can’t give him the papers saying he’s Piper’s father. I wish I could. “Sleep okay?” he asks.
“I got a few hours. How about you?” I run my hands up and down his body. He’s wanted to put a ring on my finger for a long time, and as much as I want that, I can’t. Not yet. Not until Ivy is well, and can accept the love Landon and I have for one another. I don’t want to hurt her, despite everything.
“Not bad.” On the nightstand, his phone pings, and he gently moves me off him to read the text. I’m not sure what’s going on with him, but he’s been on his phone a lot since he’s gotten back, talking in private. I want to ask who he’s talking to, but there’s this ridiculous part of me—the insecure little girl part—that is too afraid of the answer. I’ve always been in the shadows, always stood back to let Ivy shine and take what she wanted. What if now that she’s doing better, she’s taking Landon back? What if he’s agreeing, to keep the family peace? He’s a man who always wants to do the right thing. But that’s no longer the right thing, and he knows it, right?
I summon every ounce of courage I can, and ask, “Who…who is it?”
He takes a breath, and says, “It’s Ivy.”
I sit up a little straighter, my stomach growing tighter by the second. “Is she okay?”