The Baby They Longed For

by Marion Lennox

  ‘Because Rebecca hates her?’ Noah said, softly though, his hand ruffling the little girl’s hair to muffle her hearing.

  ‘Be that as it may,’ Dianne said primly. ‘Rebecca’s never admitted that. Her case for fostering was based on the extent of her disability, which I believe I’ve proved to be less than she’s previously implied. Our job then was to make an immediate call on how to get Sophie out of a situation where she was clearly failing. Once we had the facts we called a case conference to decide whether Sophie could be returned to her mother’s care. There’s never been any hint that Sophie had been mistreated by Rebecca. We decided we could keep constant supervision and that we could pull her out at need. So we rang Rebecca and said we were bringing her home to her—immediately.’

  ‘I can only imagine how that went down,’ Noah said with feeling, and Dianne gave a tight smile.

  ‘The child’s welfare is paramount. We had no choice. We knew that Rebecca was living with a new partner—we’d done background checks on him before the case conference. There was no hint he was unfit for the placement but it seems he didn’t know of Sophie’s existence. Maybe that would have been a deal breaker in their relationship—Rebecca’s reaction seemed to suggest that. Her first reaction was fury, then denial—and then panic.’

  ‘Of course panic,’ Noah said, hugging Sophie tighter.

  ‘I admit we were concerned,’ the social worker told them. ‘We were ready to back off. But we hung on long enough for Rebecca to panic herself into another way.’

  She gave a slightly shamefaced smile then, a crack in the professional façade. ‘And that was our success. It was the way I, we...had hoped. Rebecca was searching wildly for any way out and Noah was the only short-term alternative we gave her.’ Once again that embarrassed smile. ‘It may have been slightly unprofessional in pushing at this time, but by the end of the phone call the objection to Noah’s adoption had been dropped. The papers were signed the next morning, while her new partner was at golf. The only stipulation is that Noah remains quiet about Sophie’s parentage. Sophie will have that information from us when and if she needs it. Of course there’ll be further formalities, but as far as we can tell there’ll be no further problems.’

  ‘And you have my undying gratitude,’ Noah said, and then he couldn’t say any more. His face was buried in Sophie’s hair. He was just...holding.

  Dianne and Addie looked at the little girl, clinging like a wee limpet. Dianne smiled but Addie couldn’t even bring herself to smile. There was a lump in her throat so big she was struggling to breathe.

  He wanted this little girl.

  But Sophie wasn’t his child. There was no need for him to get involved. There’d never been a need.

  He loved her.

  Love...

  The word was all around her, singing its way into her heart.

  Love.

  Dianne was taking gear out of the car. Sophie was lifting her head from Noah’s shoulder, looking around with caution at this new world she’d just been introduced to.

  Noah met her gaze over Sophie’s head and he smiled and smiled.

  It was too much. Tears were sliding down her face and she couldn’t check them.

  ‘I... Excuse me,’ she managed. ‘I have... I have patients booked. I’ll...’

  She could think of nothing else to say.

  She turned and fled back into the hospital.

  But love stayed with her. Noah’s smile. Dianne’s triumph. The way Sophie clung.

  More. The events of the morning were overwhelming. The grainy pictures on an ultrasound.

  She needed Daisy, she decided. Where was a puppy when she needed one?

  ‘Which room isn’t Daisy in at the moment?’ she asked Heidi as she met her in the corridor, and Heidi looked at her in concern.

  ‘Is everything okay?’

  ‘I... Yes... I just...need Daisy.’

  ‘Daisy might currently not be in Room Seven,’ Heidi told her. ‘But—’

  ‘Thanks,’ she said, cutting off further questions. She headed for Room Seven and found one half-grown retriever puppy entertaining an elderly woman recovering from a fall.

  ‘Hi, Mrs Crammond. Do you mind if I borrow my dog? I sort of...need her.’

  ‘Of course you do.’ Mrs Crammond beamed as Daisy scrambled off the bed and headed for her mistress. ‘Everyone needs a puppy to hug.’

  ‘Everyone needs a hug,’ Addie concurred, and then added a rider. ‘Everyone needs...love?’

  CHAPTER TWELVE

  IT WAS EIGHT at night.

  Addie had worked through, seeing one patient after another, and then organised a house call to a woman she suspected was at risk of postnatal depression. There was probably no need to go this evening, but it was on her list of things to do and she needed things to do.

  She took Daisy with her. She sat at the woman’s kitchen table and admired her new baby as she talked with her and her husband. She talked about how hard it was to adjust to parenting, to the demands of a totally different life. She talked about the lack of structure, of sleep deprivation, of fears of the future.

  Addie talked of strategies. Of a plan, with sleep rosters starting that night. She helped a self-contained, controlled woman explore the idea that she needed to let go, to ask for help, to not have everything perfect.

  She left them cautiously hopeful, facing challenges together.

  Together was a good word.

  She couldn’t get it out of her head.

  She drove back to her cottage, had tea and toast, tucked Daisy into her bed and then walked across to the doctors’ house.

  The word was still ringing in her ears.

  Together.

  Noah was sitting on the veranda step.

  She’d known he would be. She’d just known.

  Because she knew this man?

  Because she loved him.

  He didn’t get up as she approached. He had a beer in his hand. He put it down but went no further.

  The night was totally, absolutely still. Or maybe it wasn’t. She could hear the gentle hush of waves washing in and out on the beach below. She could hear the call of curlews, but nothing else. The world seemed at peace.

  Waiting?

  ‘I came to ask...’ she said, and stopped. How to say it? How to take this giant leap?

  He didn’t help. How could he? she thought. He’d given her so much. The control had all been hers.

  He would never push, not this man. A man who’d taken on the care of a child who wasn’t his. A man who’d entered a loveless marriage because how could he not?

  A man who’d said the love word to her and seen her back away in fright.

  ‘I came to ask if you’d marry me,’ she said.

  Silence.

  The silence was so deep it was terrifying. The curlews had stopped their calling. Even the waves seemed to have stilled.

  Had she got it so wrong?

  ‘Why?’ he asked at last, and his voice didn’t seem like his. It was distant. Faint. As if he, too, was facing a barrier he’d never contemplated crossing.

  But there was only one answer and she had to say it. Out loud. Right there and then.

  ‘Because I love you,’ she said.

  More silence. Neither of them seemed able to move. He was still seated on the top step. She was a metre or so from the bottom step, looking up at him.

  Holding her breath.

  The whole world seemed to be holding its breath.

  ‘I don’t need you,’ he said at last.

  It could have been a rejection but it wasn’t. She knew this man. She knew what he was saying.

  ‘I don’t need you either,’ she told him. ‘I can manage by myself and so can you. I can also give you any access to our baby that you want. We can co-parent without marriage. And you... Noah, I k
now you’ll be a beautiful dad to Sophie without any help from me. So I don’t need you and you don’t need me. But today... It’s taken me a while to figure it out but when I saw your face as you held Sophie... When I saw how much you loved... Noah, I’d love to share. I’d love...to love, too. If you’d let me...’

  He stood then, but still he didn’t come to her. She saw his face under the dim veranda light and she saw the wash of emotion.

  ‘Sophie...’ he said slowly, as if struggling to emerge from a dream. ‘Sometimes... Addie, sometimes she’s not easy.’

  And there was only one answer to that. She said what was in her heart. What she truly believed. ‘She’ll be our daughter,’ she said, and had to force her voice to rise above a whisper. ‘Our family. Noah, I’m not asking for easy. I want it all. If you’ll let me.’

  ‘The full bells and whistles...’

  ‘Not quite,’ she admitted. ‘Marriage with you? Yes and yes and yes. Co-parenting Sophie and my bump and a crazy pup called Daisy? Yes, please, to that, too. But Noah, I won’t wear white tulle again. Not even for you.’

  ‘Not even a little bit?’ He sounded so forlorn she had to chuckle, but a girl had to set limits somewhere.

  ‘Not even a little bit,’ she told him. ‘I’ve sworn off the stuff for life. Noah...’ She took a deep breath. ‘The marriage thing...what do you reckon?’

  And he smiled.

  He smiled and he smiled, and his smile finally, finally carried him down the steps. Slowly, as if he couldn’t believe what was waiting for him below.

  Finally he reached her. He took her hands in his and he searched her face.

  ‘You’re sure, my Addie.’

  ‘I love you, Noah.’

  ‘And I love you,’ he told her. ‘If you’ll do me the honour of becoming my wife, I’ll be the happiest man alive.’

  ‘But...you wouldn’t be marrying because of need.’ She was still anxious.

  ‘See, there’s the thing,’ he said, almost ruefully. ‘I would be. It’s been a while now since I conceded that I need you. But it’s you I need, Addie. Not anything you can do for me or mine. I just need...you.’

  ‘Then I guess I need you,’ she admitted, and as she said it something inside her seemed to crack. To melt. To disappear as if it had never been.

  Years of building armour. Years of doing the right thing. Years of emptiness. They’d disappeared to nothing.

  There was no emptiness now. Noah was looking into her eyes with such love, with such want, with such need...

  Maybe need was a good word, she thought, and then, as Noah dropped to one knee she decided it was the best word she’d ever heard.

  ‘Then let’s do it properly,’ Noah said, his voice husky with passion. ‘Adeline Margaret Blair, will you do me the very great honour of becoming my wife?’

  ‘How do you know my middle name?’ she asked, weirdly sidetracked, and his gorgeous smile widened.

  ‘I looked it up on staff records...just in case I ever needed it.’

  She chuckled and she, too, dropped to one knee. ‘Me, too,’ she admitted. ‘I sort of...needed the whole box and dice. So... Noah William McPherson, yes, please,’ she whispered. ‘And will you...?’

  ‘Don’t be daft, love,’ he told her and his arms drew her into him. Firmly. Strongly. ‘You’ve already asked. But, yes, please, too.’

  And then there was no need—or space—for words for a very long time.

  * * *

  Happy is the bride the sun shines on...

  But it wasn’t sunny, Addie thought in satisfaction as she gazed out her bedroom window down to the beach below. The sea was covered in morning mist.

  It was a far, far different wedding than the last one she’d tried.

  They’d decided on a morning wedding because that’s when Sophie and their newest addition to their family, Giles William, were at their most social.

  They were being social now. Sophie was Noah’s decreed ‘best man’. She was dressed in so many pink flounces they almost enveloped her. She’d been practising for days, twirling and twirling, loving the way her dress flared when she spun, giggling at the sight of her pink self in the long mirror. It had been hard keeping it fresh but from today she could wear it whenever she wanted.

  From today...

  It really wasn’t from today, Addie thought dreamily as Heidi fussed over her frock.

  Addie was wearing a gorgeous, sapphire and white dress, fifties style with a rainbow-coloured shawl. Her dress hugged her to the waist, then flared out as Sophie’s did, so they could twirl together. Still breast feeding, her bust was two sizes larger than the last time she’d tried on a wedding dress.

  She was a different woman from last time she’d worn a wedding dress.

  She was totally, gloriously happy.

  For, marriage or not, she and Noah were now permanent in every sense of the word. Currawong seemed to be their for ever home. They were still living in the doctors’ house but a beautiful new home was being built up on the headland. They had friends. They had jobs they loved.

  They had each other.

  Noah...

  He was waiting now, dressed in a charcoal suit, standing on the sand with his hand tucked into Sophie’s. Sophie...a gloriously contented little girl, her dad’s friend.

  Her dad? That was now definite. The adoption papers had come through three days after Giles was born. Giles, who was currently being held by Morvena. Morvena was standing with Daisy by her side. Waiting.

  It seemed the whole town was waiting.

  The promise was for heat later, but right now the sun was struggling to filter golden light through the haze hanging over the ocean. The sea itself was calm and still. Tiny waves washed in and out at the water’s edge. Sandpipers scuttled along the shore, feeding at low tide, seemingly oblivious to the chairs, the ribbons, the flower-strewn makeshift altar and the myriad people waiting to see Noah and Addie married.

  Any minute now...

  She looked at her reflection one last time and her reflection smiled back at her. This was no bride turned out to be someone she wasn’t. This was Addie. Mother of Sophie and Giles and a dog called Daisy. This was Addie, obstetrician to Currawong Bay.

  This was Addie, beloved of Noah.

  She turned from her reflection and Heidi smiled. ‘Ready?’

  ‘Ready,’ Addie whispered, and smiled and smiled. And then she left her bedroom, she left the house and she walked the last few steps to the beach.

  Where Noah stood waiting. Smiling. Her beautiful Noah.

  ‘Will you take this man...?’

  Of course she would. Of course she did.

  Rings were exchanged, golden bands set with tiny slivers of agate. They matched the signet ring on Noah’s right hand and the simple stone at Addie’s throat, jet-black agate with the purest of white hearts.

  They were just...right.

  Finally the words were spoken. ‘I now declare you man and wife,’ and Addie’s smile couldn’t be contained.

  And neither could the sun. It broke through the mist in a glorious shaft of golden light, to shine on bride and groom and all who loved them.

  Happy is the bride the sun shines on...

  But who needs the sun? Addie thought mistily. Not when I have Noah and Sophie and Giles and Daisy.

  Not when I have everything I need.

  Not when I have love.

  * * *

  If you enjoyed this story, check out these other great reads from Marion Lennox

  Finding His Wife, Finding a Son

  Reunited with Her Surgeon Prince

  Falling for Her Wounded Hero

  A Child to Open Their Hearts

  All available now!

  Keep reading for an excerpt from The Single Dad’s Proposal by Karin Baine.

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  The Single Dad’s Proposal

  by Karin Baine

  CHAPTER ONE

  ‘TRIATHLON DAD IS finally in the building,’ Summer muttered under her breath as Dr Rafael Valdez made his way to the day-care centre.

  He was still some distance away but she followed his progress along the walkway from the main building and the reactions of the patients and staff of the clinic as they stopped to stare at the handsome Spanish surgeon. It was hard not to, even for someone who’d quit her job at a prominent hospital and come to this island to escape the temptations of handsome men and the chaos they created.

  Although only a couple of miles off the coast of Boston, Maple Island gave the impression she was far from the troubles she’d left on the mainland as it was only accessible by ferry or light aircraft. They were still susceptible to the same wintry weather here as the city she’d grown up in at this time of the year, but there was a distinct vacation vibe about this laid-back place that meant it never really bothered her. It wouldn’t be long before the sun was shining again and the influx of tourists would double the size of the population. As long as she didn’t dabble in any holiday romances, or any romances for that matter, she could live here happily.