Always With Me

by Barbara Freethy

  "Yes. But before you get all worked up—I'm not interested. I'm on a relationship hiatus."

  "That sounds boring."

  "I could use some boredom. I've had a little too much excitement the last year."

  "Well, if Zach is back, I think more excitement is on the way."

  "Can we change the subject?"

  "Do you have something more interesting to talk about?" Keira teased.

  "I might. I was going through one of the boxes I picked up at the camp and I found a photo of a girl who kind of looks like me, and she also happens to be wearing a locket exactly like the one I lost." She opened her bag and took out the photo she'd impulsively brought with her. "What do you think?"

  Keira studied the photo, her brows knitting together. "Well, she has blonde hair and brown eyes and that does look like your locket… Who is she?"

  "I don't know, but I need to find her. This picture was in a pile of photos from thirty or so years ago. This girl would probably be about the same age as my biological mother."

  "Oh, whoa, wait…I didn't know that's where we were going. You think this girl could be your mother?"

  "I'm sure it's a long shot, but there's something about her. Anyway, I thought I'd show the photo around and see if anyone recognizes her."

  "What about your mom? How does she feel about this? You were always afraid of making her feel bad."

  "I have her blessing. She doesn't think I'll ever be satisfied until I try to find my biological mother."

  "So, you're really doing it."

  "I'm taking it one step at a time. This is the first step."

  "What are you girls looking at?" Ruth interrupted, wandering over to the island.

  Keira showed the picture to her mom. "Gianna is wondering who this is. I don't suppose you recognize her, Mom."

  Ruth gave Keira a confused look, then turned her gaze to Gianna. "That's you, Jill. Don't you recognize your own picture?"

  Gianna's heart skipped a beat. Was Ruth confusing her name? Gianna and Jill sort of sounded the same. "What is Jill's last name?"

  "You don't know your own name? Goodness, you're as crazy as I am."

  "Mom, do you remember Jill's last name?" Keira asked.

  "I'm not sure." Ruth squinted at Gianna, then frowned. "Maybe you're not Jill."

  "Did you grow up with Jill? Were you friends?" Gianna asked.

  "She was Tammy's friend. Or maybe she was Joan's friend. Goodness, I'm not sure of anything." She looked at her daughter. "I'm doing it again, aren't I? I thought I was getting better."

  "You're fine, Mom," Keira assured her. "There's the doorbell. Do you want to let our guests in?"

  "All right," Ruth said, then shuffled off.

  "I'm sorry, Gianna. Mom has memory lapses. She has been getting better with therapy, but she still gets confused."

  "Do you think the girl in the photo is this person she calls Jill?"

  "I honestly don't know."

  "But it could be a clue."

  "Maybe. It looks like you're going to have more to do this summer than sell your aunt's antiques. You can look into this photo of a girl who might be your bio mom, and then there's Zach…"

  "I won't be busy with him."

  "We'll see. I can't wait to see him again. And no matter what you say, I bet you feel the same."

  "You'd lose that bet."

  "No, I wouldn't," Kiera said with a laugh. "You might be able to lie to yourself, but you can't lie to me."

  Chapter Twelve

  She was a liar. When Zach arrived at the party with Hunter and Lizzie a half hour later, butterflies danced through Gianna's stomach, and she felt ridiculously eager to talk to him again. She could barely concentrate on the conversation she was having with her third-grade teacher, Miss Baker, who had apparently bought a house through Keira several weeks ago.

  She thought at any moment Zach would interrupt them, but he was caught up by the crowd in the living room. Breaking away from Miss Baker, she made her way out to the pool area, sitting down next to Hannah, who was sunning on a lounger, her fair skin lathered in sunscreen, a floppy straw hat on her head.

  "Hey, Hannah," she said, pulling over a chair. "I didn't know you were out here. I must have missed you come in."

  "You were busy chatting when I arrived."

  "It's fun catching up with everyone. Is Chloe here? I haven't seen her yet."

  Hannah frowned. "She's not coming. She said the café was really busy this morning, and she's tired, so she's going to lay low."

  "That's probably wise. I really hope Kevin gets back in time for the baby's birth. Chloe seems fragile right now. She's trying to tough it out, but I can tell she's scared."

  "I know. I wish she'd take it a little easier with work. On the other hand, the café keeps her too busy to worry about Kevin." Hannah picked up her phone as it buzzed. "Sorry. I need to text my brother back. He's trying to plan a surprise party for my parents' anniversary, but we're having trouble connecting."

  "Sure. Go ahead."

  As Hannah occupied herself with her text, Gianna couldn't help noticing that Hunter and Zach had made it to the pool deck. Both men were in board shorts and T-shirts, and they were clearly an instant hit, especially with the ladies.

  Watching Zach work the crowd, she couldn't help thinking that she'd seen this show before. The first day of camp, he'd been doing the same thing. All the kids had been drawn to him. All the girls had been smitten. And she'd thought to herself there was no way this guy was ever going to look in her direction.

  But he had looked in her direction. Somehow, he'd managed to see past the paint on her fingernails and the braces on her teeth and the freckles splattered across her cheeks. Somehow, he'd seen her in a way that no one else had.

  Her heart turned over as his gaze caught with hers now, and like so many years ago, she felt the same foolish, reckless wave of desire—a desire that was now being fueled by memories of the night before. Kissing Zach as an adult had been even better than kissing him as a naïve, insecure girl. Not that that hadn't been great, too. She just hadn't been emotionally ready for that teenage relationship.

  Which reminded her that she wasn't emotionally ready for an adult relationship with Zach, either. She needed to get her life together. And she needed to do that on her own.

  "Earth to Gianna…"

  "What?" she asked, turning back to Hannah.

  "I've been talking to you for five minutes. But you've been distracted by a certain handsome guy with incredible green eyes."

  "Sorry. What did you say?"

  "It doesn't matter. What happened last night after you left the bar with Zach?"

  "Nothing," she said quickly. "He walked me home."

  "And he just left?"

  "Obviously, he left."

  "Did you kiss him?"

  "We don't need to talk about Zach," she said, heat running through her face.

  Hannah laughed. "That's a yes. Wow."

  "It's not a wow."

  "Really? It was disappointing? Because you used to say he was incredible."

  "It wasn't disappointing. I don't want to talk about it. It was a moment of madness. It won't happen again."

  "Are you sure about that?"

  "I would like to be," she said candidly.

  Hannah met her gaze with a sympathetic smile. "Zach always got under your skin. I was so jealous of you that summer. I was supposed to go to camp, but I came down with mono and I missed out on all the fun you and Keira had. Then I had to listen to your stories for the next six months. It made me crazy."

  "Sorry about that. Camp was fun," she admitted. "Until the end."

  "When Zach hurt you. You thought he stole your locket, but obviously you've forgiven him."

  "I now believe he didn't take the locket. So, there's nothing to forgive. Actually, I probably need him to forgive me, because my accusations got him kicked out of camp."

  "If he kissed you last night, I'd say he's forgiven you."

  "We were just c
urious."

  "And it wasn't wow?"

  "Okay, maybe it was," she admitted. "But I was a little drunk, and it was a hot night, and there was a full moon."

  "You are coming up with a lot of excuses," Hannah said with a laugh.

  "I called off an engagement three months ago. I need to be on my own and not get tangled up with another man. Nothing is going to happen with Zach."

  "Time will tell. By the way, he's headed over here."

  She turned to see Zach making his way around the pool. She drew in a breath, steeling herself against the wave of attraction already running through her.

  "I'm going in the pool to cool off," Hannah said, swinging her legs off the lounger. "You might want to do the same."

  "Maybe later." She'd put on her bikini under her sundress, but she wasn't that interested in swimming.

  Hannah smiled at Zach as she moved past him and into the pool.

  "Hey," he said with a sexy smile. He sat down on the lounger Hannah had just vacated. "Not swimming?"

  "Not yet. But feel free to go ahead."

  "I'd rather talk to you."

  She sucked in a quick breath, reminding herself that Zach's attention was not a good thing. "It looked like Lizzie was introducing you around."

  "I've met a lot of people in the last thirty minutes; I don't remember any of their names."

  "That's understandable. It's a big crowd."

  "I did speak to Keira—I'd forgotten how fun she is."

  She nodded. Like Zach, Keira had a way of becoming the center of any social circle with barely any effort. "She's great. And she's an incredibly generous person. She was working in fashion in New York when her mom got in a car accident. She gave it all up to come home and take care of her and run the real-estate business that still supports them."

  "That's quite a sacrifice. I met Keira's mother, too. She seemed a bit bewildered by all the people."

  "I guess there are memory issues, especially when it comes to faces. You know what's weird, though?"

  His gaze narrowed. "No. Tell me."

  "When I first came into the house, Keira's mom called me Jill. I figured she couldn't remember my real name. But when I showed Keira the photo of the girl from camp, Ruth took a look at it and said it was me—Jill. I don't know if this girl really is named Jill or if Ruth just got confused."

  "Interesting. Maybe that's a place to start. How old is Ruth?"

  "Well, Keira is twenty-nine, same as me. I think her mother is in her early fifties, so she would probably be older than my biological mother. Ruth also mentioned that Jill had a friend named Tammy or maybe it was Joan."

  "That's a few more names for you to research."

  "I was thinking I should go by the library tomorrow. If Mrs. Gibbs is still working there, she might remember their names. She's been the town librarian since before I was born."

  "Good idea."

  "Is it? Am I about to go down a path that could lead to pain for more people than just myself?"

  "I honestly don't know. But there's only one way to find out. You have to roll the dice, take the leap, jump off the cliff."

  She smiled. "Do you have any more clichés to throw at me?"

  "I think I've run out." He paused. "Gianna…"

  The way he said her name made her stomach tighten. "Do you want to go swimming?" she asked.

  "I thought you said you didn't want to."

  "Well, I've changed my mind." She pulled her dress over her head. Only then did she realize in her effort to stop him from saying whatever he'd been about to say, she'd now put her bikini-clad figure right in front of him.

  His appreciative gaze swept her form. "You're beautiful, Gianna."

  She couldn't help but feel flattered by his words. She'd been skinny as a board back in camp, but thankfully she'd developed a few more curves over the years.

  As she got to her feet, Zach stood up, and took off his shirt. The scars on his chest reminded her of what he'd been through.

  He met her gaze. "I can't run away from the past, even with my shirt on, so I don't even try."

  "I know. I just wish you hadn't had to go through what had to be a very painful experience."

  "I survived. Let's go swimming."

  He reached for her hand, and she couldn't help but slide her fingers around his. They exchanged a long, hot look. "I know you said we were over," he murmured. "But—"

  "There can't be a but," she said firmly.

  "And yet there is."

  Before she could utter another protest, a wave of cold water hit her in the side. She looked down at Hannah's smiling face.

  "It looked like you two needed to cool off," she teased.

  Gianna let go of Zach's hand and jumped into the pool. While she normally preferred to take a slower, more controlled, approach to entering a body of water, she needed a jolt, something to get her out of the dream world she was creating in her head, where she and Zach got a second chance…

  Zach landed in a cannonball splash not far from her, sending another wave of water over her head. He laughed and then swam away, heading toward Hunter and a bunch of other guys who were shooting a basketball through a hoop at the far end of the pool.

  Hannah came over to her. "Well, I don't know what your definition of wow is, but I gotta say seeing the two of you together—wow."

  "What am I going to do about him?" she asked.

  "You know what you want to do."

  "But I need to stop doing what I want and start doing what I should. And that needs to begin with Zach."

  "Good luck, Gianna. If I had a guy that hot looking at me the way Zach looked at you, I'd be taking him home and making him breakfast."

  "I'm off men," she said rather desperately.

  "That's almost always when the best ones show up."

  Gianna managed to avoid Zach for the rest of the party, although she had to fight off ridiculous waves of jealousy every time she saw him chatting up some other woman. She had a feeling he'd decided to avoid her as well, or maybe he was finally accepting the fact that she wasn't interested in him.

  Only, she was. But she wasn't going to do anything about it.

  Still, there was only so much she could take, and she left the party a little after ten. She had a long day ahead of her tomorrow, and after a lot of sun and too much food, she was ready for bed.

  As she entered the store through the back door, she was startled by a crash and a beam of light from the far corner.

  "Who's there?" she demanded, as she hit the light switch.

  "It's just me," a woman said, stepping out from behind a large armoire.

  She was shocked. "Mrs. Carver? What on earth are you doing here?"

  "I'm looking for Becca's desk. There's something inside. I didn't know Ron was going to give it away. I have to find it."

  Helen wore white pants and a long, silky top. Her hair was tousled, and her eyes were wild. As she moved around another piece of furniture, she stumbled and bumped her leg.

  "Be careful," Gianna warned.

  "I need my desk. Where is it?"

  Helen's words were garbled and slurred, surprising her even more. "Are you all right, Mrs. Carver?"

  "I am perfect," she said in a drunken sing-song voice. "I just have to find the desk. Where is it? You must know. Are you trying to hide it from me?"

  "I'm not trying to hide it. It's in the showroom. I moved it in there earlier, so we could get it on sale."

  "I didn't see it."

  "Well, it's there. I can show you."

  "Thank God you found it." Helen paused, looking confused. "Did you find it? Was it in the desk? I thought it was with Rebecca, but maybe it's been in the house all these years."

  "I didn't see anything in the desk."

  "She used to hide it," Helen rambled on. "She was so secretive. I guess she had to be." Helen reached for a wine bottle she'd apparently brought with her and took a swig. "It wasn't my fault, Gianna. You believe me, don't you?"

  "I think I should ta
ke you home," she said slowly.

  "But it's in Rebecca's desk. I think it is. I don't know. Maybe it's not." Helen suddenly swayed, then sank to the floor like a broken doll.

  Gianna rushed forward. She dropped to her knees and put a steadying hand on Helen's arm. "Let me take you home, Mrs. Carver."

  "Can't go home like this. Ron will be mad. Don't tell him. Promise me, you won't tell him. It's a secret. Please," she begged. "He'll hate me."

  "I won't tell him anything, but you can't stay here."

  "I'll just take a little nap." Helen stretched out on the floor and tucked her hand under her head, letting out a snore as she passed out.

  Gianna blew out a breath. What the hell was she going to do now? Mrs. Carver was too heavy for her to move. She supposed she could call her parents, but it was late. They were probably asleep. And she didn't want to bother her aunt, either. She could call the police, but that seemed rather extreme.

  She was still baffled by Helen's cryptic words. She'd broken into the store to look for something in Rebecca's desk. It had to be something significant. Was it something Zach should know about? Would it affect Zach's ability to connect with Hailey?

  She needed to look in the desk again. She walked into the showroom and checked the drawers for a second time, but everything was empty. Whatever Helen was looking for wasn't there.

  Tapping her foot on the floor, she debated her options, then made an impulsive, probably bad decision. Pulling out her phone, she texted Zach and asked him to call her when he was alone. She didn't want to catch him in the middle of a conversation at the party.

  Her phone rang a moment later.

  "Gianna?" Zach asked. "I'm surprised to hear from you. I thought you weren't talking to me."

  "Something has happened."

  "What? Are you okay?"

  "I'm fine. But Mrs. Carver broke into my aunt's store. She was clearly drunk, and now she's passed out on the floor of the storeroom."

  "Are you serious?" he asked in shock. "Why would she do that?"

  "She was rambling about something of Rebecca's, something that might still be in the desk her husband put on consignment last week along with some other items. I'm sure she'll hate that I'm calling you, but I don't know what to do. She made me promise not to contact her husband. Should I leave her on the floor? I don't think I can move her. Or maybe you could call Mitch," she said. "He can come and get her. That's probably the best solution."