Endless Love: The 4Ever series #3
Page 22
Teresse asked him how she was doing.
He showed her hanging on by seesawing his hand.
Then, his mother asked if she could see Holly. She wanted to speak to her, tell her to fight, apologize and ask her for her forgiveness. She believed that Holly could hear her and was so afraid that Holly would reject the kidney and the liver if she found out it was from her.
She wanted to prepare her.
It was why he’d sent Amelia and Bernice away.
Jane was outside Holly’s room. She’d wanted to see Mara for such a long time and Jake just told her it was a bad idea. But she had to speak to her. He couldn’t speak for Jane and ask her to forgive his mother. That woman had lived through the worst nightmare imaginable, and now she was living through it again.
She’d lost so much more than any of them in this room.
His mother just had to bear with what Jane wanted to say to her.
He kissed Holly gently on her head and went outside.
Jane was waiting on a chair for Gus to bring Mara.
She wasn’t even supposed to be here—she wasn’t healed yet—but that was Mara. She never gave up, always pushed herself, even now right after a major surgery.
But Devenn had given her the all clear, as long as she stayed in the wheelchair and went back as soon as possible.
The elevator opened and his heart clenched as he saw his father pushing her out of the elevator.
Jane hadn’t spoken a single word since the news got around that Mara gave Holly her kidney and part of her liver.
She just had a lot of angry tears in her eyes.
“You okay?” Jake asked.
She gave him a tight nod.
He was worried about Jane.
His mother and father reached them and Gus stopped the wheelchair.
“Mara, I want you to meet Jane, Holly’s mother.”
Mara just stared at her. There was so much regret and guilt on his mother’s face.
She really had no idea what she just did for him.
Then again, she never wanted anyone to find out.
Jane simply stared at her, expressionless. And then her chin pulled slightly and her lower lip trembled.
It was a mannerism she shared with Holly.
Fuck, he missed her so much, missed her voice, her laughter.
He wasn’t going to make it without her.
Jane got up and surprised him when she embraced Mara.
His mother was confused; she clearly hadn’t expected that, but after a few seconds, she folded her arms around Jane.
“I’m so sorry. I wish I could do more.”
Jane lift up her head. “You did more than any of us could. For so many years I held on to my anger at you. I told myself that if I ever met you, I would make you wish you’d never been born, but when Jake told us what you did, it just vanished. You gave my daughter a chance again. Something I couldn’t do,” Jane cried as she crouched in front of Mara. Mara rubbed her shoulder.
“I need to ask you for something really big, and I would understand if you are not ready,” Mara spoke softly and Jane looked at her. “Please can you find it in your heart to forgive me for what I put your daughter through six years ago.”
“It’s almost seven, and it’s already done. Your organs are the biggest gift there is. Holly was never one for promises, as I made and broke them so many times, but she was someone who looked at actions. Actions speak louder than words.”
Mara sobbed. “And here I was thinking I would get another scolding. I’m so sorry.”
“Stop saying you’re sorry. Help us to get her to fight.”
She nodded and the two woman hugged each other again.
Jake was astonished.
He really thought that Jane was going to yell, like he did. But she didn’t. She said thank you.
His mother touched his arm as Gus pushed the chair past him and into Holly’s room.
Jane followed after and so did Jake. He gave Jane a side hug.
They all started to leave and it was only Jake, Gus, Mara and Jane in the room with Holly.
Gus pushed Mara’s chair next to Holly’s bed and Jake took the chair on the other side.
His mother just stared at Holly.
No hatred in her eyes, only regret.
She touched her face softly.
“I don’t know what to say to you. I’ve brought you so much pain. That day, I wasn’t myself. I mean, I couldn’t have been. To tell you straight in your face that Jake didn’t want the baby, and I panicked when you didn’t want to believe me.” Mara sniffed wiping away the tears.
She told him that she didn’t believe him. Knew that he would never abandon them.
“And a part of me bargained on it as I know my son. He showed you in so many ways that he loved you. Ways that I was too blind to see. I’m so sorry that my lies caused you to say goodbye to your one girl. I can only imagine the pain that must have caused. I will never be able to make that up to you and I understand if you never want me near your children. But I need you to accept my kidney and liver, Holly. Not because it’s from me, but for Jake. Please.” She sniffed. “He is a mess without you and I don’t want him to disappear again.”
A tear fell from her eyes. “And one day I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me for all I ever did to you.”
She grabbed her hand and kissed it as more tears fell down her cheek.
His mother wasn’t a crier. He’d always thought that she was so strong, and had wondered if she was even capable of crying, and now tears were spilling down her face.
She smiled at Jake and then grabbed Gus’s hand that was on her shoulder.
“Your sister?”
“She’s not ready.”
She nodded. “I’ve hurt her so much.”
“Mom.” Jake sighed.
“No, a mother shouldn’t hurt her children like I did, Jake.”
“And a mother doesn’t leave her child while trying to mourn the one she just lost. We all make mistakes Mara,” Jane spoke. “I know you think that I lost so much more than you did, but I could’ve done things differently. I chose the easy way out, and only showed her what she shouldn’t do when things get tough. Everyone makes mistakes. Holly taught me that taught that we are all human. She gave me a second chance, even after the other million chances I already messed up. Your kidney and liver is something that she will treasure until the day she dies, which isn’t going to be today, or tomorrow, or the next. I’ve spoken to Him, he knows where I stand.” She chuckled and they all laughed through their tears.
Jane sniffed. “The hard part isn’t asking them to forgive us, it’s forgiving ourselves. And you should too. One day, not now.”
Mara smiled. “You bet on that one day.” She touched Holly’s face again. “You can take me back now, Gus.”
“See you later, Mom.”
“Phone me please?” she whispered to Jake and he nodded. “See you soon, Holly.”
Almost three months had passed since the transplant. His mother was back on her feet, and she was even drinking green healthy smoothies now. Said a new lifestyle and diet was in order. And she was also a constant visitor at Holly’s side. She made sure Jake ate, went home to shower. She was his mother again. And every day, she sat and spoke to Holly. Sometimes even read to her.
Holly was still the same and even though her heart still beat, she was still not breathing on her own.
Her brain was still active. He wondered where she was, what she was seeing, what she was doing. Was his mother right? Could she hear them? He had to believe it.
A knock came at the door and Mara looked up, so did he.
Amelia entered and just stared at her mother.
“I don’t think it’s a great idea, Jake.” Amelia sighed.
“Amelia, they are—”
She held up her hand. “I know. But it’s just my opinion. I can’t be here, I’m sorry.”
“I’ll leave.”
“No, Mom. Stay.” Jake said a
nd she looked at Amelia, who dashed a tear away.
Leo and Armand walked in with two carriers.
Mara cupped her face and just stared at Jake.
“Just make sure she’s okay,” he said to Armand and he winked.
He told Jamie that Mara finally gained her memory back and she wanted to meet Jamie.
“They are so gorgeous. May I?” Mara asked as Jane took Cooper from his chair.
“Yeah, go ahead, Grandma.”
She took out Bradley and kissed him over his little face.
“Hey baby, you are so beautiful. Just look at you. He is so beautiful, sweetheart.”
“What can I say? I make beautiful babies.”
His mother laughed.
“Definitely a Peters,” Mara said as she bounced with Bradley, smiling and cooing words of how beautiful he is.
“And this is Cooper.” Jane said.
Mara bent over and gave Cooper three quick kisses. “You are going to be a handful, aren’t you. Yes, you are.” She had a huge smile on her face.
The door opened and Gus walked in. Jamie was clutching his hand.
His mother started to cry and Jake took Bradley so she could focus on Jamie.
“Come here, buster,” Jake held him in the air and Bradley laughed out his belly. Cooper followed and everyone laughed at the twins, but Mara just stared at Jamie.
She went over to her and sat on her haunches in front of Jamie. She touched her shirt and her arms.
“Hey sweetheart.”
Jamie smiled shyly.
“I’m so sorry, baby.”
“It’s not your fault, Nanna,” Jamie said. “The red was mean.”
Mara frowned, but Gus mouthed that he’d fill her in on it later. “Very mean.”
Jamie hugged Mara around her neck and Mara melted like they all had when they first saw her.
“Grandpa was right. Your hugs are the best.”
Jake smiled. He was happy that his daughter finally met her other grandmother who had been lost to her all this time. They started talking about everything under the sun as Jamie clambered onto her lap, at ease with the new person in her family. But he could still see the guilt and the pain reflecting in his mother’s eyes. She knew there were supposed to be another one, and it was evident on her face that she was hurting.
He knew she wouldn’t forgive herself for that for a very long time.
Twenty-Three
HOLLY
She found herself at the hospital again.
There was no one around her, but the weird part was she kept hearing the buzzing noises of people working and talking to each other, like a real hospital.
What was this?
“And I’m telling you, that is what he said,” a woman’s voice close to her said. She looked but didn’t see the woman as their conversation died out in the distance.
“Just get me the damn labs back, please.” A male voice spoke right in front of her, but she still saw nothing.
A current ran through her body just as she wanted to get out of his way.
She took a breath and felt slightly out of place but gained normality back.
The deserted hospital and the voices didn’t make any sense but she knew the hospital.
It was Downsend.
She passed more talking and more currents flew through her.
She took the elevator and took it up with more people speaking at once.
She got off on the sixth floor where her room was.
More currents flew through her as more talking and laughter filled the area.
But the place was completely deserted.
She didn’t like it.
She was on the verge of freaking out.
“Maybe I should give them the letters.” A familiar voice, Aggie’s voice, came from behind the desk, but there was nobody standing there.
She closed her eyes. “No, Aggie, you promised.”
“She is not dead yet,” Sue’s voice said. “She could still wake up.”
“Could? It’s been almost three months, Sue.”
Three months? Holly felt pressure on her chest and saw her room. She ran to her room but couldn’t open it. Her hand kept gliding through the handle.
She closed her eyes. She wasn’t a solid entity. Was she even alive?.
But she walked forward.
Another current rushed through her body and it took a few seconds to go away.
Then she opened her eyes.
She gasped as she saw her body hooked up to a breathing machine. Her heart beating on another.
There was nobody here, and it was so quiet. She wasn’t yellow anymore and her hair was growing back.
She didn’t like it. Where was her family? Where was Jake? They wouldn’t just leave her here, all alone.
“Wouldn’t it be great,” Rod’s voice filled the room and the feeling went away. “If she woke up now and said WHAT’S UP BITCHES?”
Laughter came, tired laughter. She heard her mother’s and Leo’s. Gus’s were also somewhere and someone she didn’t know. But no Jake.
He must be in a consultation or operating. Life did go on. Three months.
No wonder Romalia was so adamant that she return.
How long has she been in that place?
She felt something touching her hand. It felt nice.
“Holly,” Jake said and she smiled. He was here. “You need to wake up, baby. You are scaring the crap out of me.”
“I’m sorry. I would wake up if I knew how.” She voiced but he didn’t hear her, just as she couldn’t see him. But she felt him.
“I can’t do this without you, please,” he pleaded with her.
A knock came on the door and she looked. She heard the door open but the one in her room stayed close.
This was so weird.
“Amelia,” a voice she thought she would never hear again said. Mara?
Someone sniffed. “I need to speak to you,” Amelia said and the sound of a chair screeching against the floor filled the room.
What was Mara doing here?
She followed Amelia and Mara voices.
She could still feel Jake touching her hand.
She went through the door again.
There was still no one there. It was so empty and she felt so alone.
“Amelia,” Mara spoke softly to her right and Holly went there.
“I don’t know how to do this,” Amelia cried.
“You don’t have to do anything, sweetheart. I know I betrayed you,” Mara replied.
Holly was right next to them.
Why couldn’t she see them?
“This was my mistake and you can be as angry as long as you want to be. I never thought one would die. I’m so sorry,” Mara cried and Holly could hear Amelia sobbing.
“Why isn’t she waking up?” Amelia asked.
“I don’t know.”
“She got your kidney and a piece of liver, Mom. She should wake up.”
“I know, sweetie,” Mara said.
Holly just froze. Was she a ghost? She had to be. Why else could she hear them but not see them?
Mara had given her what she needed.
She couldn’t see Mara, but she walked until she felt a current, and a soft gasp came from Mara.
“Mom, what is it?”
“I don’t know,” Mara whispered.. “I just feel, I don’t know.” She sounded at peace.
“Thank you,” Holly whispered even if Mara could not hear it.
She felt something heavy in her chest and a horrible beeping sound came from inside her room.
Both women gasped.
The current disappeared as a long beep resonated from the room.
Cries came from inside, mixed with panic and sobbing.
Jake was breaking down.
“No, no, no!” he screamed. “You are not fucking leaving me, Holly! Do you hear me? I won’t let you!” H didn’t sound like himself.
She felt something pounding hard on her chest.
It ac
hed.
“Please, God please,” Amelia’s voice screamed. She was hysterical.
Holly knew she had to fight. This wasn’t over yet.
She ran to her room, through the wall and saw her body lying motionless on the bed.
“Fight,” She screamed at herself. “ Just fight.”
But nothing happened. More stabbing pains pounded on her chest, but the beeping sound didn’t recede.
“C’mon baby. That kidney and liver is healthy. Just breathe,” Mara begged.
She was in front of Holly again. She was trying to save her life.
“Please, God, Please,” Holly begged as Jake cried hysterically.
She hated that he was in pain.
“Fight, fight. How do I do this?” She felt another stab in her chest.
It was followed by more pain and agony all over her body.
Something wasn’t right.
Fight. She kept yelling and more pain came. She was going to lose everything if she didn’t fight.
* * *
JAKE
He felt as if he was losing his mind.
Sounds came out of him that he never thought he could make. His father clutched him as he broke down and slid to the floor.
He couldn’t even speak.
Fight baby, please. Don’t leave me. He yelled in his head.
God, please. He yelled more.
Why wasn’t He listening.
“C’mon baby, that kidney and liver is healthy. Just breathe,” his mother shouted as she tried to get Holly’s heart to beat again.
He couldn’t look. The beeping sound was still one flat tone.
Please, he begged tiredly. I can’t do this without you.
Suddenly, her heartbeat returned.
He could feel everyone’s relief. He looked at his mother. She looked exhausted, an tears streamed down her face.
How much longer was Holly going to scare him like this? She needed to wake the fuck up.
“It’s okay, Jake. Jake, her heart is beating, it’s okay.” His dad mumbled the words over and over, not just to reassure Jake, but himself too.
He heard a gurgling sound.
“She’s waking up,” Mara said.
Jake pushed his father away and got up. He looked as his mother taking out the breathing pipe.