A Seed Planted

by Cat FitzGerald

  Is our relationship going to work? It’s good, but something’s missing, and it’s kinda weird that he doesn’t want to sleep with me. Well, I sort of get it. I remember what Grandma Jean said, but I don’t think that applies to guys. Or maybe it does to Christian guys. Saving themselves and all that. I guess if I’d followed that advice in the first place, I wouldn’t be where I am today. Well, I can change. If that’s the way it needs to be, then I can wait. I’m strong enough. That will be my New Year’s resolution!

  With that settled, Julia curled up with a magazine in front of the fire to wait for Marley to get home.

  **************************************************

  New Year’s Eve

  Marley and Julia were busy in the kitchen, he chopping the collard greens, she getting the black-eyed peas ready to soak. They’d grocery shopped the day before and were preparing for the traditional New Year’s Day meal of Hoppin’ John, aka black-eyed peas and rice, for good luck, along with the greens for financial prosperity. A ham was in the oven, and cornbread would be made tomorrow.

  Marley started to say something about New Year’s with Jean Ready but caught himself. He didn’t want to upset Julia again by speaking of her grandmother, although he wished their memories could be shared. He sighed.

  “What was that for?” Julia smiled as she looked over at him.

  “Nothing really, just thinking,” Marley replied.

  “About what?”

  “Are you sure you want to know?” Marley returned her gaze.

  Julia looked away and turned off the water where she was rinsing the peas.

  “Yes, I’m sure.”

  Marley hesitated before continuing. “I was thinking about the last New Year that Miss Jean was alive, working with her right here, doing exactly what I’m doing right now and her over there at the sink. And now, it’s you standing in her spot, and it’s kind of surreal, you know? But it’s nice. Real nice. I like it. I hope you do.”

  Julia didn’t respond immediately. She looked deep into Marley’s brown eyes as she dried her hands on a dish towel. Glancing out the window for a moment, she took in the frozen fields, covered in white, icicles hanging from the outbuildings. An unexpected snowstorm made them glad to have stocked up on supplies before Christmas. Marley could plow the driveway, but nobody would be out this far to clear the county road for several days. Snow was practically unheard of in this part of Georgia, but a peculiar system had rolled across the Deep South from Texas to Georgia and on into parts of South Carolina.

  Returning her gaze to Marley, she felt warm inside. They certainly had their differences, but he was a good man. She knew that in the deepest part of her soul. The part that was falling in love with him.

  “It’s okay, Marley. I’m happy you got to know my grandmother, spend time with her. She needed somebody here, and I’m glad it was you.” Julia stepped over and kissed him lightly on the cheek before returning to her work.

  Marley looked at her for a long minute before turning his attention to the greens once again.

  **************************************************

  “Here’s to a great new year, a bountiful spring harvest, and no repairs needed on the house or barns!” Julia lifted her glass of sparkling wine in celebration.

  Marley lifted his in return and added, “And here’s to no sick animals, or accidents.”

  Julia laughed. “We’re kind of pathetic, aren’t we? Is that really the best we can come up with?”

  Marley’s expression turned serious as he looked at her.

  “Okay, then. Here’s to us. May the Lord bless and strengthen us for the days ahead, and may we honor Him with our lives.”

  Julia’s happy face faltered for a second. Leave it to Marley to bring God into everything. She recovered quickly and lifted her glass again. “Hear! Hear!” She exclaimed a bit too loudly. They emptied their glasses and moved to sit by the fire. Coco had been curled there on the rug the entire evening, oblivious to everything, her soft snoring in the background.

  Marley did not normally drink alcohol. He’d witnessed the effects on Malcolm Ready and others, not wanting to follow their destructive paths. The two glasses of wine tonight made him lightheaded even though he and Julia enjoyed a good meal earlier. Soft music played on the radio as they gazed at the fire.

  Julia pulled a blanket from the sofa and wrapped it around them, leaning against Marley. Her warm body next to his sent tingles through him as he kissed the top of her head. She turned to face him, her green eyes bright with emotion.

  Marley hesitated, then leaned over, his breath catching at the scent of her perfume. Their lips met, and passion flared.

  Chapter 32

  January 3, 1973

  “You’re what? What are you talking about?” Julia was sure she’d misunderstood Marley, but the look on his face told her otherwise. She set her coffee cup down shakily.

  “I’m moving into the barn temporarily until I can find another place to live. I can’t stay here, Julia. With you. I just can’t.” Even though his tone was firm, Marley’s expression was tortured.

  “I don’t understand. I...I thought you had feelings for me, that something...was happening.” Julia hated the querulous sound of her voice, but she couldn’t hide her shock. Neither could she deny the anger building on top of her fear.

  “That’s the problem, Julia. I do have feelings for you, and I have to leave before things go any further. We came way too close the other night. I apologize for that, and I can’t let it happen again. You can sell the farm to somebody else, whatever you want to do. But I have to go.”

  “It’s because I’m not a Christian, isn’t it?” Julia replied, practically sneering the word Christian. “I’m not good enough for you.” Her stare was hard.

  “No! I mean, it’s not at all about your being good enough. It’s just...we’re not in the same place, and my faith is very important to me. It’s the most important thing to me, and if I stay here with you, it won’t be. You will. I’m sorry, Julia, but I can’t take that chance.” Marley hung his head to hide the tears forming in his eyes. “I’m so sorry. I thought I could stay here and help you find your way back to God, but it’s not working, and the temptation is too much. I’m too weak.”

  Marley glanced up, saw the fury in Julia’s eyes, turned and walked out the back door with his bag and a broken heart.

  **************************************************

  Julia shook with rage. She’d let her guard down, trusted another man, and it had blown up in her face. What a self-righteous jerk! Who does he think he is? I do not need his holier-than-thou attitude, so the sooner he’s out of here, the better. Slamming her cup in the sink so hard it broke, JuJu swore under her breath. I will never trust another man. Ever.

  You need to trust Me.

  Julia whirled around, thinking Marley had returned, but there was no one there. Taking deep breaths to calm herself, she strode through the kitchen and upstairs where she slammed the bedroom door, causing everything to rattle in the wake of her fury.

  Throwing herself across the bed, she buried her face in the pillows, and despite her effort, sobs racked her body. She’d not felt pain this deeply since her grandmother died, and she never wanted to feel it again.

  **************************************************

  Marley sat on the cot he’d set up in the loft. It was cold, but he had plenty of blankets, and he’d purchased a kerosene heater at the hardware store in anticipation of his move. South Georgia winters were pretty mild, and most of the snow from the freak storm had melted. He would have to make do because there was nothing else available. He would leave Julia a note about caring for the animals and dealing with the hay until she could sell the place or hire someone else. In spite of everything, he would not shirk his duties, but he definitely needed to stay out of sight as much as possible.

  Marley had never felt so alone. While he certainly had his share of dates in the past, no one affected him the way Julia did.
Part of the time, he wanted to strangle her, the other part he wanted to wrap her in his arms and kiss her until they were both crazy.

  It felt like his heart had been cut out.

  Grabbing his Bible, Marley searched for comfort. He knew this was the right thing, but it hurt. He’d been sure the Lord was using him to bring Julia back to Himself, but he’d been horribly wrong about that. Opening the sacred text, Marley bowed his head and whispered, “Lord, I need to hear from you. Help me trust what you’re doing, especially where Julia’s concerned. I love her. I’m sorry, but I do.” When his eyes opened, they fell on a verse from the book of Romans.

  And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.

  Weeping, Marley closed the book and fell on his knees before the only One who could make things right.

  Chapter 33

  January 24, 1973

  It had been three weeks since Marley dropped his bombshell on Julia, and she’d not seen him other than coming and going in his truck. She hid behind curtains to watch as he pulled into a covered stall in the barn. Since he got out on the opposite side from where she stood, she couldn’t see him walk inside. She got the note he left about the chores, and she assumed he was getting up with the chickens because she heard him leave most mornings before she was out of bed, returning each time after dark.

  She couldn’t help but wonder what he was doing. And who he might be doing it with.

  Shaking off the troublesome thoughts, Julia poured the remaining coffee in the sink then checked the fridge and pantry, discovering to her dismay that she needed to buy groceries again.

  How do I run out of food so fast? Marley’s not here to eat anymore, so what gives?

  “Okay, I have got to get a grip.” Julia spoke out loud as she shut the fridge door and grabbed her keys from the nearby hook. She deliberately reminded herself of their last conversation which renewed her anger at Marley and simultaneously eliminated any soft feelings that lingered.

  Hopping in her Mustang, she shifted to first gear and roared down the gravel drive, tires spitting stones in all directions. It only took ten minutes to reach town, and force of habit caused her to scan the vehicles in front of the diner for a sign of Marley’s presence. She spotted his truck almost immediately, two spaces down from the entrance. Gathering her wits, Julia continued towards the grocery store and parked. Since she’d verified Marley was at the diner, she didn’t need to scan this lot today. Small favors.

  Julia found what she needed quickly and, within thirty minutes, was out of the door again. She managed to avoid the chatty old lady’s checkout lane today, which saved her a whole ten minutes. Settling her bags in the trunk, she got in and headed back the way she’d come, unable to stop herself from glancing at the diner again. Marley’s truck was still there, and the front door opened just as she pulled even with the building.

  She slowed, catching her breath as Marley stepped through the door, wondering if he would see her. Julia downshifted, and Marley looked up. Their eyes met across the distance, but Julia was distracted by the sight of Nancy clinging to his arm. She waved, a big smile on her face.

  Julia didn’t look back as she gunned the car, leaving Marley and Nancy to stare after her.

  **************************************************

  “Boy, you sure are somewhere else today,” Nancy whined as she took another lick of her ice cream cone. Marley sat across from her at the small raised table, his ice cream melting in the bowl. He couldn’t get Julia’s image out of his mind, the look on her face when she saw him and Nancy. What must she be thinking? She’s thinking that Nancy and I are together, that’s what. Oh, man. They were absolutely not together, but Marley feared Nancy might think that as well. They’d shared one meal at the diner and decided after to walk to the ice cream shop in the next block. Nancy grabbed his arm as soon as he opened the door for her. Did she see Julia’s car and do that on purpose? I wouldn’t put it past her.

  “Hello! Earth to Marley!” Nancy waved a napkin in his face.

  “Oh, sorry, I guess I was daydreaming,” Marley responded somewhat sheepishly.

  “Yeah, I guess so. You were daydreaming over lunch, too. Am I not enough woman to keep your attention?” Nancy practically purred as she gave Marley her best coy impression. It was all he could do not to laugh, but he sort of felt sorry for her, too. She tried too hard with the wrong guys and scared away the potentially right ones. He didn’t want to hurt her feelings, but he needed to be sure she was not pinning her hopes on him. The last thing he wanted was a relationship with Nancy.

  “Look, Nancy, I like you. Really. You’re a nice girl—” Marley didn’t get to finish his sentence.

  “But,” Nancy spit the word. “There’s always a big but after a guy tells you you’re a nice girl.” She stood up, tossed the rest of her cone in a nearby trashcan and stomped away.

  “Nancy, wait!” Marley called after her, but she threw a wave over her shoulder and kept walking. Dropping his head in his hands, he sighed and noticed his ice cream had turned to soup. He’d planned to spend the day in town, maybe go to the library, but now, he felt at loose ends, no longer interested. He didn’t want to go back to the farm because Julia was probably there. He had plenty of work to do, but it was hard to concentrate knowing she was just inside the house. If he got dirty again, he’d have to return to the truck stop for a shower. That was getting old, but it was that or go in the house and face Julia.

  Not having another option that appealed to him, Marley threw his bowl into the trash as well and walked back to his truck. The time allowed him to pray and clear his head.

  Turning into the drive, he steeled himself for the sight of Julia’s car and breathed a sigh of relief when it wasn’t there. Pulling into his spot in the shed, he quickly ran up the steps and changed into work clothes. If he hustled, he could get another load of hay into the barn, maybe before Julia returned.

  **************************************************

  Julia was shocked to see Marley’s truck when she pulled around back of the house. Hesitating, she looked around for him before exiting her car. The tractor was in place, so he wasn’t out in the field. He must be in the loft. Maybe his little date with Nancy wore him out. Julia frowned at the memory. Who cares anyway? She huffed and got out of the car, still glancing over her shoulder as she made her way across the yard with the groceries she’d purchased earlier. She’d ridden around for a while after seeing Marley and Nancy in town, jumbled thoughts making her crazy. So what if he’s seeing her? It’s not like I care. He’s a jerk anyway. A pious jerk.

  With that thought ringing in her mind, Julia shoved open the back door at the same moment Marley burst through, startling her so badly she dropped her grocery bag, cans rolling everywhere on the porch amidst scattered frozen dinners.

  “Good grief! Watch where you’re going!” Julia yelled as she glared at Marley, who stood shell- shocked just inside the door wearing nothing but a towel. Noticing his lack of clothing, she gasped and turned away, scrambling after the wayward food items. “What are you doing in here?” she asked in an accusing voice without looking in his direction.

  “I, uh, I needed a shower after working in the field. I’m sorry. I thought I’d be done before you got back. Uh, I forgot to bring my clean clothes with me. Sorry,” he repeated, dashing back through the kitchen and down the hall to put his dirty pants back on. Julia gathered the groceries but discovered the bag was torn, so she set them down again to go in search of a new bag from the pantry. Marley was nowhere to be seen, but she could hear noises from the servant’s quarters where he’d lived before. The memory of him standing there with only a towel made her face warm. Stop it! Stop it! Shaking her head to clear her thoughts, she grabbed a bag and returned to the porch. She felt Marley’s presence behind her.

  “Julia, I’m truly sorry. I didn’t mean to embarrass you. It won’t happen again.” Marley moved away from her and o
pened the screen door.

  “Where have you been showering?” she asked.

  “What?”

  “Where have you been showering? Surely this is not the first one you’ve had in three weeks.” Julia couldn’t help the slight grin that pulled up the left side of her mouth but kept her face turned away from Marley.

  “Um, at the truck stop.”

  “Way out by the interstate? That’s a long way to drive every day.” Julia stood up with the bag and went into the kitchen. Marley hesitated then stepped over to the door.

  “I don’t go every day. I’ve been able to uh, you know, wash up some with the hose at the barn. I’ve got some soap and stuff.” Marley sounded embarrassed.

  “Why don’t you shower at Nancy’s?”

  Marley looked up, a stunned expression on his face. “What? Why would I do that? Oh, you saw us today, okay. I get it. Look, nothing is going on with Nancy. We had lunch, that’s all. And ice cream, although that didn’t turn out well.”

  “Why not?” Julia asked.

  “It just didn’t, never mind why.” Marley wasn’t about to tell Julia it was because Nancy caught him daydreaming about her. “Look, I’ll get out of your way, and again, I’m sorry.” Marley turned to leave.

  “It’s okay if you shower here. I’m not completely heartless.”

  Marley stood silently before nodding in acceptance of her offer and closing the door. Julia moved to the window and watched him walk, head down, towards the barn.

  Chapter 34

  February 1973