Asher: A steamy contemporary military romance (Project Arma Book 3)

by Nyssa Kathryn

  Shoving the asshole in the shoulder, Asher shook his head. “Not a chance.” Sitting back, he looked around the table and took a moment to appreciate his friends.

  Each man was built like a warrior and could fight like one, too. But what you couldn’t see from the outside was that they were good men. Hell, they were the best men Asher had ever met.

  They did the right thing not because they were told to, but because they had principles. Good values and ethics. It was the foundation of being SEAL, but Asher knew that not every SEAL lived that way.

  The best thing about them though…they had each other’s backs. More than once one of his brothers had saved his ass, just as he had saved theirs. They could count on each other. Through anything and everything.

  Glancing beside him at Lexie’s angelic face as she spoke to Evie, he experienced one of those moments where, just for a minute in time, everything felt perfect in his world.

  Yes, danger loomed. Immoral people were after them, and they had to watch each other’s backs.

  But Asher had family. Men who would back him up and lay down their lives for him. And he had Lexie.

  He took another bite of his pizza—only to jump at Lexie’s sudden squeal. He dropped the slice back to his plate, head swiveling around, searching for the threat.

  From his peripheral vision, he noticed all seven of his brothers doing the same.

  When Asher saw nothing amiss, his attention drew to Lexie. Pure joy shone on her face. The woman was beaming. Without a word, she took Asher’s hand and placed it on her stomach. That was when he felt it.

  The softest movement. A light flick on his palm.

  Asher’s gaze shot back to Lexie’s, and he saw her eyes glistening with tears. “Our baby just kicked.”

  Smiling, Asher nodded. “I felt it.”

  Some moments, it was surreal that he was going to be a father. A dream. Moments like this solidified the fact that Lexie was growing their baby. A real-life son or daughter.

  But it was Lexie’s smile that almost undid him. The woman looked beautiful at the best of times. But with a smile that size on her face, she looked fucking gorgeous.

  Tilting her chin up, she placed a kiss on his lips before turning back to Evie.

  Bodie clapped his hand on Asher’s shoulder. “Congrats, man.”

  Not taking his eyes from Lexie, Asher nodded. “Thanks.”

  “Lucky son of a bitch.”

  Asher looked back at his friend. “You want a woman of your own?”

  Bodie liked to be the comedian of the group. Laid-back. Easygoing. But right now, there was no humor in his expression.

  “Do I want a woman to connect with? Someone who can’t get enough of me? Fuck yeah I do. The question is, how do you find that?”

  Asher shrugged. “You don’t. It finds you.”

  He sure hadn’t gone looking for Lexie. The woman had just walked into his life. Shown up at Marble Protection, demanded they hire her, and captured Asher’s attention.

  “You’re saying I have to wait for destiny to step in?” Bodie drawled. “I’ve got to wait and see what the big man has planned? Shit.”

  Laughing, Asher leaned back in his seat while throwing an arm around Lexie’s shoulders. “I wouldn’t go so far as to say it’s fate or anything. More random good luck.”

  “Damn, I’ve got the worst luck.” Bodie’s gaze shot to the roof. “If anyone’s listening, throw me a bone. Someone to grow old with would be nice. Someone to play cards with in the old folks’ home. Someone to eat soup with when I have no teeth.”

  Shaking his head, Asher chuckled. “You’re looking too far into the future, Red. Even if you did meet someone at this very moment, two people can’t guarantee that they’ll grow old together. That they’ll change together at exactly the same pace. Love is fluid. It changes as quickly as we do.”

  Feeling eyes on him, Asher turned to see that Lexie was no longer speaking to Evie. Instead, her eyes were on him. Confusion swirling in their depths.

  Before Asher could question it, her phone dinged, causing her to look away.

  Was she upset at what he’d said? Asher bit back a curse. He didn’t always say what he was supposed to. Christ, he never even knew what that was. Did any man know the right thing to say all the time?

  Lexie’s shoulders tensed beneath Asher’s arm. Looking down, he leaned forward to read the text message, but she quickly locked the screen before he could.

  Eyes going back to her face, he studied her for a moment.

  Worry. She tried to hide it, but it was as visible on her face as a huge neon sign in a dark room.

  “Who was that?” Asher kept his voice casual while stroking her shoulder with his thumb.

  Lexie kept her eyes downcast as she pocketed her phone. “No one. Just one of those marketing messages.”

  Lexie took another bite of pizza. But the exhilarating high of a few minutes ago was gone. So were the delectable moans. Both replaced with something new. Something darker.

  Something she wasn’t telling him.

  * * *

  Looking anywhere but at Asher, Lexie tried to focus on the joy of the first kick she’d felt moments ago. In reality, she was really trying to forget the two things that followed.

  The first being Asher’s comment.

  Love is fluid. She wanted to ask him what he’d meant by that. The only reasonable meaning she could think of was that love changes. Was that what he meant? That he didn’t think his love was forever?

  Lexie snuck a glance at the man beside her. He was now laughing with the guys across the table. The conversation seemingly wiped from his memory.

  Unfortunately, Lexie couldn’t forget it so easily.

  Nibbling on her lip, she tried to push the hurt to the back of her mind. But if she was honest with herself, even though she wanted answers, she wasn’t sure she was brave enough to ask.

  She was scared. Scared about what his answer might be. That he might have meant exactly what she thought he meant. That he didn’t believe love was forever.

  The heaviness of her phone in her pocket reminded Lexie of the second thing that had happened—a message had come through from her mother.

  She had been thinking about Gwen since the kidnapping. Every time she’d attempted to call her mother, there was no answer. Then the line was disconnected. Now, the woman was contacting her from a new number?

  Baby it’s me. I’ve got a new number. I’ll call soon.

  That was the short message she’d had just read.

  Lexie had wanted to respond immediately. A million questions ran through her head.

  But Asher had been hovering over her shoulder. And for some reason she didn’t want him to see.

  Even though he knew about Gwen’s number disconnecting and had immediately organized Evie and Wyatt to search for her, she didn’t want to tell him about the message. Because his comment had thrown her.

  “Hey, it’s Sage.” Evie’s voice distracted Lexie from her thoughts.

  Her gaze shot to the door. Sure enough, Sage had stepped inside the pizzeria and was walking to the counter. The doctor’s spine was a little straighter than usual, her steps slightly stilted.

  Was it Lexie’s imagination or did Sage have fear lurking in her eyes?

  Pushing her chair back, Lexie stood. “I’m going to say hi.”

  Sage and Lexie had become somewhat friends since her weekly visits. The other woman was kind and friendly. She had a sincerity about her that Lexie was drawn to.

  When she drew closer to the counter, she noticed the shadows under Sage’s eyes.

  Crap. Lexie would bet her last dollar the woman was scared for one reason—and that reason involved some former SEALs breaking into her place.

  “Sage!”

  Her head popped up at the sound of Lexie’s voice.

  “Lexie! Hi.” Shock registered briefly on the other woman’s face, but she quickly recovered. “Are you here with Asher?”

  “I’m here with everyone
from Marble Protection.” Lexie indicated with her head toward the table.

  Sage glanced over to the group before turning back to Lexie. “How lovely. Do you do this often?”

  Shrugging, Lexie answered, “Once a month, maybe? We usually go to someone’s home but everyone agreed that pizza with no cleanup was in the cards for tonight.”

  Just then Bill popped behind the counter. “Can I help you?”

  “Yes.” She nodded, stepping forward. “I have an order for Sage.”

  Bill turned to grab her pizza before Sage handed over the money.

  “You’re welcome to sit with us for a bit if you want,” Lexie offered.

  She hoped the other woman said yes. The primary reason she was in town was for Lexie. To look after Lexie and her baby’s health. But she knew no one. No one but them. That had to be lonely.

  Sage’s gaze swung back to the table. A moment of longing washed over her face before she cleared it. “No, I shouldn’t. I’m working tomorrow. Seeing some of my local patients. I should have an early night. Thank you for offering.”

  Lexie wanted to push. Try to persuade the other woman to change her mind. But her features were set.

  Sage placed a hand on Lexie’s arm. “Before I go, how are you feeling?”

  She smiled as her hands went to her stomach. “I just felt the first kick.”

  Sage’s lips spread into a wide, genuine smile.

  Nope, there was no way this woman was the villain. She was too real. And too kind.

  “I’m so happy for you. That must have been such a magical moment, Lexie. And while surrounded by all your friends, too. How amazing. Get ready, because that’s only the beginning.” Sage squeezed her arm.

  “I cannot wait. This baby can kick away.”

  Sage took a step toward the door. “Well, I should get going.”

  “Wait.” Lexie quickly closed the space between them again. “I wanted to ask if you were okay? You looked a bit stressed when you walked in here.”

  Sage glanced around before nodding her head. “I’m okay.”

  Lexie didn’t need Asher’s lie detector abilities to see through that one. “You can talk to me if you need to, Sage. I know we haven’t known each other that long, but with you staying in town for a while and probably not knowing many people, I’m happy to be an ear to listen. A friend.”

  Plus, she felt ginormous guilt that Sage had traveled to Marble Falls for her, and now the guys had searched her room in an attempt to protect Lexie.

  Sage nibbled at her bottom lip for a moment. It was like she was trying to decide whether to share her concerns. “It’s nothing. I mean, there was something small that happened the other week. I got back to my room at the inn and found my window open. Since then, I can’t shake the feeling of being watched. I don’t know. I’m probably being silly.”

  Lexie’s heart went out for the other woman. There was real fear in her expression.

  She also felt angry at the men. Angry that they had left the window open. Surely they were better than that?

  “I wouldn’t think too much on it. I’m sure it was nothing.”

  She wanted to reassure Sage. Lessen some of the anxiety on the other woman’s features.

  Shaking her head, she gave a tight smile. “Of course. I’m just overthinking things. I’ll see you at our next appointment, Lexie.”

  Then she was gone. Leaving as quickly as she’d arrived.

  Heading back to the table, Lexie glanced around at the men. Maybe she should speak to them? Ask them to tell Sage what they had done so that she knew she has nothing to worry about.

  That’s when she noticed Mason. His gaze tracked Sage through the window. Intensely.

  He’d probably listened to every word they’d said.

  Lexie’s brows knitted together as she watched Mason watch Sage. It was almost as if he was interested in her.

  Sage was pretty. Correction, she was stunning. And intelligent and kind. What normal, red-blooded man wouldn’t be into her?

  Maybe Mason would be the one to speak to her then. Let her know that she was safe.

  Lexie was about to take a seat when she remembered the message that had come through from her mother. Pulling out her phone, she quickly sent off a reply.

  Are you okay? I’ve been trying to call you.

  The response from Gwen was instant.

  Yes, I’m okay. I left Albert. I’ll explain later. I got a new phone to cut off contact with him. Can’t talk now. Will call soon.

  Reading the message a couple of times, Lexie didn’t know how to feel about that information. On one hand, Albert was an asshole. Lexie didn’t need to meet him more than once to know that. So the fact that Gwen was no longer with him was a positive.

  But Lexie didn’t understand why her mother needed a new phone. Surely she could’ve just blocked his number.

  Asher threw his arm around her shoulders again when she took her seat.

  While his touch usually made her feel secure and cared for, this time she just felt uncertain. Almost to the point where she wanted to pull out from under him.

  Asher turned to study Lexie’s face. “All okay?”

  No. No on so many levels. The threats from Project Arma weren’t okay, her mother’s actions were worrying, and Asher’s words were confusing.

  And mixed together they created a pool of anxiety in her stomach.

  But she didn’t say that. Instead, turning her head, she smiled at the man she loved and lied through her teeth. “Everything’s okay.”

  19

  “She was quiet the entire drive home?”

  “Quiet as a mouse,” Asher responded as he climbed into the driver’s seat, Luca getting in on the other side. “Quiet in the car, from the car to the house, even when we got into bed. And every time I asked what was wrong, I got the same ‘nothing.’”

  Which was a flat-out lie. It had to have been the longest Lexie had ever kept quiet in her life. Because he’d said one thing. Damn, he was an idiot.

  Once behind the wheel, Asher pulled out of the police station parking lot. He and Luca had run a refresher session on acquiring and detaining people for the city police force.

  The job was an easy one, and it allowed the guys to maintain a good relationship with the boys in blue.

  “Sounds like you upset her, my friend,” Luca laughed.

  Asher had come to realize that. He just didn’t know how to fix it. “How do I make it better?”

  Because so far nothing had worked. Even in bed when he’d put an arm around her, she’d been stiff as a board.

  Lexie was the most strong-willed person he’d ever known. It was a large part of the reason he’d been so drawn to her. That’s why the knowledge that he’d hurt her pulled at his chest so damn hard.

  Luca shrugged. “She obviously misinterpreted what you meant. Women read too much into things sometimes. Just talk to her. Clarify what you said to Red.”

  The trouble was, Asher wasn’t entirely sure what he’d meant. He cared about Lexie. More than cared; he loved the woman. That was why he was struggling to make a lifelong commitment to her.

  He just couldn’t drop the notion that she deserved better.

  When Asher was quiet for a moment too long, Luca turned toward him, cocking his head with a look.

  “Don’t be a damn fool, Striker. Lexie is perfect for your dumb ass.”

  “Exactly,” he replied. “She’s too perfect. What we feel for each other is too perfect. How can something so perfect last until the day we die?”

  The concept seemed impossible to Asher.

  “Ahh,” Luca chimed in, like he’d had an epiphany.

  “What?”

  Nodding, he clapped his hand on Asher’s shoulder. “You’re scared to lose her. That’s why you haven’t told her you love her.”

  Swallowing, Asher tightened his hands around the wheel. “Of course I’m fucking scared to lose her. If I convince myself I can have her forever, something will go wrong. She’ll get sick of me
or Project Arma will swoop in and screw everything up. She’ll realize she’s better off without me at some point.”

  Lexie deserved easy. A husband who worked a nine-to-five job, a puppy in the backyard, and no danger lurking around every corner.

  “Or,” Luca rebutted, “you’ll be happy.”

  That seemed like a pipe dream.

  “You’re not scared to lose Evie?” Asher couldn’t help but be skeptical of the idea.

  “Every damn day. But if I push her away, then I’ve already lost her. And I’d have no one to blame but myself.”

  Taking a breath, Asher shook his head. “Look at the danger I’ve already put Lexie in. She can’t even have a normal pregnancy because of our history.”

  “Ever thought maybe she doesn’t want normal? She just wants you?”

  Asher took his eyes off the road for a moment to raise a brow at his friend. “Since when did you become a fucking therapist?”

  “Since you started needing one.”

  Asher chuckled.

  At that moment, his phone rang. Noticing it was Evie, Asher pressed answer on the car’s Bluetooth.

  “Ace. What’s up?” Asher called, using the nickname the team gave her.

  “Hey, sweetheart,” Luca said.

  “Luca?” Evie sounded confused for a moment.

  “We just finished the police refresher session. We’re driving back to Marble Protection now.” Luca responded.

  “Good. I mean, what I have to tell you isn’t so good. Or maybe it is, I’m not sure.”

  Asher tensed. Evie sounded frazzled, which meant she had information.

  “What is it, Ace?” Asher kept his tone even, when internally he was trying to hold himself together.

  “Remember how you asked me to search for Lexie’s mother and her boyfriend, Albert Boyd?”

  Yes, Asher remembered. How could he forget? “Because they left the house they were living in and disappeared into thin air. Not to mention her disconnected phone line. I remember.”

  “Well, I found Albert,” Evie began, then stopped. When she didn’t immediately continue, Asher almost lost his composure.

  “What did you find, Evie?” Luca asked calmly.