by Clara Benson
‘And quite right too,’ said an oblivious Goose. ‘The more the merrier, I say. Far too many old people here as a rule. We need more girls like you to brighten up the place.’
‘And you can always trust Freddy to find them,’ said Iris, more tartly than she had intended. ‘There seems to be a different one each week, and I’ve rather lost count. I must say, I had no idea you knew each other. Where was it you met? The Excelsior Club, I expect.’
‘Yes, it was, as a matter of fact,’ said Daphne.
‘I thought so,’ said Iris. She turned to Freddy. ‘Isn’t that where you met those two French dancers? And the Mexican bandit’s daughter? And the butcher’s widow from Streatham? Or was it Clapham? I forget.’
Daphne’s smile had not faltered, but Freddy was by now losing all feeling in his arm. He glared at Iris, who went on:
‘Poor Freddy—he’s so easily taken advantage of, especially when he’s been drinking. Not that I suppose he’d been doing anything of the sort when he met you, but I shouldn’t feel easy if I didn’t give you a friendly warning.’
‘Awfully kind of you, but it’s quite unnecessary,’ replied Daphne. She smiled serenely, for she felt herself the victor on the grounds: first, that possession was nine points of the law, and second, that unlike Iris, she had not lost her temper.
Goose had begun to sense an under-current, so he said to Daphne:
‘I say, has anybody shown you around the house yet? It’s a crumbling old pile, but we have some rather splendid daubs in the gallery and the grounds are pleasant enough.’
‘Oh! That reminds me—Ro and I were going to explore the secret passage today,’ said Iris.
‘A secret passage!’ exclaimed Daphne. ‘Do you mean to say there’s one here?’
‘Certainly,’ replied Goose. ‘As a matter of fact we have several, although most of them are blocked or unusable for one reason or another. I think Iris is talking about the one between the library and Ro’s room. Should you like to see it?’
‘Yes please!’ said Daphne. She let go of Freddy’s arm and beamed at Goose in genuine excitement at the prospect. Iris had already gone to fetch Ro, and Freddy seized the opportunity to take a deep breath and flex his arm surreptitiously. He had the feeling the next few days would be awkward.
On overhearing that a secret passage was to be explored, several of the other guests expressed a lively interest in seeing it, and as a result the whole party removed to the library to watch the show. It was a dim and musty place, with a high, vaulted ceiling and a mezzanine balcony running around three sides of the room. Three large sash windows gave out on to the lawns and the countryside beyond, and since the view was a fine one, several of the guests went across to look out.
‘Better not touch that one,’ said Bea to Lavinia, who was struggling with the catch of one of the windows. ‘It’s not safe, and we’re waiting for them to come and put the new weights in.’
‘Oh, I do beg your pardon,’ said Lavinia. ‘Yes, I see you have the new weights here. I merely thought a little fresh air might dispel some of the stuffiness. But perhaps better not, if the window is dangerous. Now, Lord Holme, I’m simply dying to know where this secret passage is. You must tell us, because I know I shall never spot the entrance myself. Is there a trap-door under the carpet?’
‘Secret passages are a not uncommon feature of great houses such as this one,’ announced Professor Coddington in his loud, didactic voice. ‘I imagine, my dear lady, that we will find there is a secret door behind one of the bookshelves. That is how these things are usually concealed.’
‘You’re quite right, sir,’ said Goose. He strode over to the far corner of the room, to an ordinary-looking row of shelves. ‘Here.’
They all crowded around him. He beamed at everybody and indicated a large volume whose title declared it to be a book of zoological illustrations produced for the edification of children and the otherwise easily entertained. All the other books on the shelves were collections of sermons from some forty years back.
‘We put this here so we’d remember where it was,’ said Goose. He took the book down, reached in and felt around at the back of the shelf. ‘There’s a catch here, you see.’
There was a click and a creak, and something moved. Goose pushed, and a whole section of shelf swung inwards to reveal a space just big enough for a largish man to step inside. They all shuffled forward and peered in.
‘Not much to see from here,’ he said. ‘As you can see, it runs along the back of the shelves for a way.’
‘May we go in?’ said Iris.
‘We’ll need a torch,’ said Ro. ‘I think there’s one in that drawer.’
A torch was duly produced and handed to Goose.
‘Better not all go in at once, dear,’ said Bea. ‘It will be a dreadful squash and nobody will be able to see a thing.’
At length it was decided that Goose, Ro, Daphne, Freddy and Iris would go first. They all crowded into the passage, Freddy bringing up the rear, and Goose switched on the torch and waved it around.
The walls of the passage were made of rough-hewn stone which felt cold to the touch. Their route ran straight for about twenty feet, then turned sharply left, then right. Here, away from the passage entrance, it was much darker, although a little light filtered through from one or two chinks in the walls.
‘There are steps here,’ said Goose. ‘Mind you don’t trip over.’
‘Where are we?’ said Iris.
‘Somewhere behind the panelling in the hall, I think,’ replied Goose.
‘Yes,’ came a voice behind Freddy, making him jump. It was Professor Coddington, who must have crept in behind them unnoticed. ‘I have been paying close attention to the distance and the direction, and according to my calculations, we are now standing approximately parallel to the bottom of the grand staircase.’
‘Are there rats here, do you think?’ said Daphne nervously.
‘Probably,’ said Goose, and she gave a squeak.
The light from the torch bobbed above their heads as Goose began to ascend the steep stone steps, which curved around in a spiral to the left. As the torch disappeared around a bend, those at the rear were plunged into darkness. Freddy could hear the professor behind him, puffing with the effort of climbing the steps. At the top, Goose paused to allow everybody to catch up with him.
‘The passage splits into two here,’ he said, his face ghostly in the light of the torch. ‘We want the left one.’
They all followed him along the left fork, which continued straight for another ten yards, then turned right. Just after the turn Goose stopped unexpectedly, and they all bumped into one another.
‘Here we are,’ he said. ‘There’s a door here, you see. Stand away—it opens towards us.’
The door in the panelling opened easily, having been loosened by Ro the day before, and Goose made to step through it, but Iris hung back.
‘Where does the right fork go?’ she said. ‘May we explore that too?’
‘It leads here too,’ said Ro. ‘But it’s a longer route and a bit of a squeeze, that’s all. Do you really want to see it? It’s not especially interesting.’
But Iris was keen, and so Goose said, ‘Come on, then,’ and stepped back from the entrance to Ro’s room. Instead of turning back the way they had come, however, he continued along the passage. A few yards farther on, it narrowed considerably, and the roof became lower, so they all had to duck their heads.
‘Everyone all right back there?’ came Goose’s voice from the front. ‘Don’t worry, it’ll get wider in a minute.’
After a few more yards the passage curved slightly, then seemed to end. Goose stopped and waited again.
‘This is where the other fork comes out,’ he said. If we turn down it we’ll arrive at the top of the staircase we came up.’
They looked in the direction he indicated, an
d saw that here the passage turned right.
‘What’s that?’ said Iris, who had spotted something to her left. Goose directed the torch obligingly towards it. It was a low, square doorway with a cracked wooden beam above it. ‘Is it another passage?’
‘That one’s even narrower than this one, and leads to a dead end,’ said Goose. ‘I think there was a way out at one time, but it seized up. You can go and look if you want, but there’s nothing much to see.’
They all peered into the opening, but the place was very cramped and uncomfortable, and so at last they moved away from it and took the right turn instead. Sure enough, this passage was wider and higher, and, after a bend or two, led back to the head of the spiral stairs.
‘That’s all clear enough,’ said Iris. ‘To get to Ro’s room from the staircase you take the left fork then turn right, or the right fork then turn left.’
‘Exactly,’ said Goose. ‘I don’t know why they built it like that.’
‘Perhaps the builders fell out with one another and built two rival passages,’ suggested Freddy.
‘Silly,’ said Iris.
They returned along their original route to Ro’s bedroom. Goose held the tapestry out of the way and they all stepped out. Professor Coddington began examining the panelling.
‘Is it possible to lock the entrance from this side?’ he said.
‘I don’t think so,’ said Ro. ‘And why should I want to, anyway?’
‘For safety, of course,’ he said.
‘I don’t see who’d want to come in,’ she said. ‘There’s only us here most of the time.’
‘We’d better go down and tell the others they can come through now,’ said Daphne, and they all filed out of Ro’s bedroom and back down the stairs. Freddy was the last to come out, and as he shut Ro’s door he thought he caught sight of a figure flitting along the corridor, close to the wall. He frowned and looked again, but whoever it was just then whisked silently out of sight around a corner. He shrugged and followed the others down to the library. Dr. Bachmann, Ralph, Kitty Fitzsimmons and Lavinia Philpott were just preparing to enter the passage. It seemed Nugs was joining them. He made to usher Mrs. Dragusha in before him, but she retreated.
‘I do not like dark spaces,’ was all she said. ‘I prefer to stay here, where it is light.’
‘I quite understand your reticence,’ said Mr. Wray. ‘I have done enough scrambling about in the dark myself. I, too, shall remain here.’
‘Suit yourself,’ said Nugs, then glanced at Lavinia’s retreating figure and, with an expression of great satisfaction, slid into the dark passage after her.
‘Perhaps we ought to have warned her to take a weapon,’ murmured Cedric, and was rewarded with an impatient look from his wife.
Despite Cedric’s fears, the party returned a little while later safe and sound, Lavinia talking nineteen to the dozen.
‘Oh, Duchess!’ she cried. ‘How simply thrilling to have your very own secret passage here at Belsingham! Lord Lucian was very kind, and insisted on showing me every last branch of it, even though it was very low and narrow in places. He said there was no danger of my getting lost as long as he had hold of me. And he was quite right, too! I had just a little squeeze to get out into Lady Rose’s bedroom, but I shouldn’t have missed it for the world. What intrigues and mysteries this house must have seen over the years! Illicit trysts and historical affairs of state discussed in the greatest of secrecy thanks to this secret route.’
‘Jolly useful for avoiding unwanted guests, too,’ murmured Cedric.
‘As a matter of fact there are a few of them around the place,’ said Bea. ‘They’re mostly forgotten about now, of course—too cold and dark to bother with.’
‘I should like to see the other ones,’ announced Professor Coddington. ‘Perhaps someone would be good enough to show them to me.’ Nobody seemed inclined to answer, and he took this as encouragement to fill the silence with his own voice. ‘In my opinion, the English aristocracy has been too accustomed to abuse its privileged position in order to change the course of history without due process, thus causing harm to many innocent people, and secret passages of this kind are only one symptom of this tendency.’ He addressed himself to Kitty Fitzsimmons, who had given him a politely disbelieving look. ‘I see you are not convinced, madam. Evidently you consider tunnels such as this to be a harmless diversion—a few brief moments of entertainment to pass the time during a house party such as this one. But I consider them to be something more dangerous, in that they allow men of power to act in an underhanded fashion, out of the view of the common folk, when it is their duty to act in the best interests of those who serve them. Mrs. Philpott speaks of intrigues and affairs of state discussed in the greatest of secrecy—and this is precisely my objection. In my view, by its very position the aristocracy has a responsibility to use its great wealth and privilege wisely, and this means acting in a way which is beyond reproach—and, moreover, seen to be beyond reproach. All concealment and subterfuge ought to be avoided, or actions taken with the best of intentions may be misinterpreted, or even take a turn for the bad. However, since the common man cannot be supposed to have the intellectual capacity to discern wrongdoing, or, if he does, the means to root it out without great risk to himself, I consider it my duty as a representative of the academic world, who thus has greater resources than ordinary people to discover such misdeeds, to investigate any information which comes to my attention that might suggest that the higher members of society have been conducting themselves in an illicit manner.’
The dressing-bell had rung halfway through his speech, and most of the party had drifted out of the room by this time. Only the Duke and Duchess and Kitty were left to hear him out politely. At length he concluded his discourse to his satisfaction, then announced he would go and dress for dinner.
‘Whew!’ muttered Cedric to his wife as Kitty hurried out of the room. ‘Can we do anything about him?’
‘I don’t think we can,’ said Bea. ‘We must put up with him, I’m afraid. I hope he doesn’t insist on being shown the other secret passages. Most of them are blocked or have heavy furniture against them.’
‘Oh, I don’t know,’ said Cedric. ‘If he’s so determined to think the aristocracy behave badly then perhaps we ought to try and live up to our reputation and brick him up inside one of them.’
‘Silly,’ said Bea, and they both went up to dress.
Freddy was feeling in need of a drink, and so he dressed quickly, with the intention of fitting in a quick one before dinner. As he arrived at the head of the stairs he bumped into Dr. Bachmann, who was distracted and not watching where he was going.
‘I beg your pardon,’ said Bachmann. ‘I did not see you there.’
Freddy noticed that he was looking pale and upset.
‘Are you quite well, sir?’ he said.
‘What? Oh, yes,’ replied Bachmann. ‘I have just remembered something, that is all—a matter of business. Yes, there is a matter of business I forgot to attend to before I left for Belsingham.’
‘Was it important?’
Dr. Bachmann essayed a smile.
‘A little. Still, it will have to wait now. I am sure a few more days will not matter.’
He went off, frowning. Freddy was about to continue down the stairs when he caught sight of someone coming out of a room on the West Wing corridor, and gave an exclamation.
‘So it was you I saw earlier!’ he said, as she approached. ‘I thought I must have been mistaken.’
Valentina Sangiacomo curled her lip.
‘What do you want? I’m in a hurry,’ she said ungraciously.
Freddy regarded her with interest. She was wearing the uniform of a lady’s maid, and looked fully the part, even down to the pert toss of the head.
‘That’s no way to talk to your betters,’ he said. She threw him a look which told him clea
rly enough that she had her own ideas about that, and he went on, ‘What are you doing here? Who brought you?’
‘Mrs. Fitzsimmons,’ she said.
‘A lady’s maid?’
‘A girl has to earn a living, doesn’t she?’
‘I suppose so. But I can’t quite see you in the part, somehow.’
‘It’s all right,’ she said. ‘She’s nice enough, and I get her cast-offs. Not the really good stuff, of course. Catch them letting us wear sequins.’
‘But does she know about your—er—character?’
‘What’s wrong with my character?’ she said. ‘It’s as good as anybody else’s. You’re perfect yourself, are you?’
‘Oh, I’m a model of virtue and rectitude,’ said Freddy airily.
‘Then so am I,’ said Valentina, with a glare that dared him to contradict her. Since she was an expert thief who had once taught him to pick a lock, her words were evidently a matter of form. Freddy let them pass, supposing that she would hardly risk falling into her old habits now that she knew he was here at Belsingham, for suspicion was bound to fall upon her at once.
‘I’m wanted downstairs or I should have more to say to you, but just you be sure and keep out of trouble,’ he said.
‘I will if you will,’ she said, and with a knowing wink and another toss of the head she hurried off, wholly unabashed.
Freddy watched her go thoughtfully, then headed downstairs, where he found that Mrs. Dragusha and Professor Coddington had arrived before him. Mrs. Dragusha coughed when she saw him arrive, whereupon the professor turned around, spotted him, and said, ‘Ah, yes, I am quite of your opinion, madam. One does not often see such fine works of art in a private home. Have you ever visited Florence? No? Then I suggest you do so as soon as you can, for in no other place will you find such an accumulation of works of artistic genius as there is to be found in that fair city. The Uffizi gallery, for example—’ here he wandered off into a comparison of the relative merits of some of the lesser-known Renaissance painters according to his own expert opinion, and Freddy stopped listening. He guessed they had been talking of something else when he came in—presumably himself and Cynthia, and the inferiority of their branch of the family, given the speed with which the professor had changed the subject on Freddy’s arrival. Luckily, he was freed from the necessity of joining in the conversation and attempting to sound knowledgeable about art, because just then Lavinia Philpott and Daphne arrived. Daphne was looking very fetching in pink, while Lavinia wore an astonishing creation in stiff violet silk, into which she had ruthlessly forced her not inconsiderable amplitude. Freddy hastened to help them to cocktails.