by Chrissy J
“Goddess I love you. I knew you were going to be mine the first time I laid eyes on you. I will kill any nigga for you and trust when I tell you that,” he said rubbing my face as tears rolled down my face.
“I love you to Eddie.” We kissed then fell into a deep sleep.
CHAPTER 12
SAME SHIT DIFFERENT DAY
You know when you have a gut feeling but you try to ignore it? Well that’s what I was going through. Eddie was still sleep and we didn’t get to go out, but I was happy I spent my Valentine’s Day with him. Kevin didn’t bother to call me and tell me if we were still going out, but I didn’t care. I knew it was time to move on from Kevin and what we once shared. “Baby get your phone, that shit has been ringing off the hook.” I pushed him, grabbed his phone, and then looked at the caller ID. Asia’s name was displayed. “Why is she calling Eddie?” I asked myself looking at the cable box. It was one in the morning. He told me to pass him the phone still half-asleep. I gave him the phone and got off the bed to go into the bathroom. I didn’t want to know what she was calling his phone for. Honestly, it would’ve killed me if I knew they were fucking so I didn’t question it.
“Yo,” Eddie picked up on the sixth ring. “Where you at? I thought we were going to hang out tonight?” Asia asked. I heard her cause his dumb ass didn’t turn down the volume on his phone. Eddie shook his head sitting up on the bed. He found his boxers and threw them on. “I’ll see what I can do,” he said hanging up the phone. I turned the shower on then stepped inside. “Baby get ready so we can go get something to eat. I’ve got to run right quick and drop Teddy something. I’ll be back in an hour,” Eddie said jumping in the shower with me. I looked at him and got out. That was the first lie Eddie told me, but along the course of our relationship it wouldn’t be the last lie he would tell me. “I’m not up to go out now, go take care of your business. Don’t rush, I’ll be here if you decide to come back,” I told him putting my robe on. I walked out of the room and went into the kitchen. I wanted to punch Eddie in his face for lying to me. Eddie walked in the kitchen, gave me a kiss, and walked out.
Four months passed and mine and Hershey’s birthday was in three days. It was our last year of high school. While everybody was getting ready for college, both Hershey and I were preparing for the summer. My father and Eddie planned a big graduation party for both Hershey and me. I really wasn’t down for it, but Hershey being my road dog, reminded me that we weren’t going to see half of our friends once they went off to college. Kevin kept blowing my phone up like he was crazy. I really didn’t break it off with him, I just stopped answering the phone and when I saw him with my uncle I would ignore him and wouldn’t speak. Eddie was ready to go see him but I told him not to because it would draw unwanted attention. Once I gave my body to Eddie, he was open. He didn’t want me out of his sight and it was starting to bug me. I knew he had to be fucking Asia. She had been blowing his phone up every chance she got. “Happy birthday baby, call me when you get this message,” Kevin said into my voicemail at midnight. I smiled, that nigga didn’t take no lightly. Eddie wasn’t around me that night thank God. I hit Kevin’s phone and he picked up on the third ring. I said, “Thank you,” and was about to hang up. Kevin must’ve known I was going to hang up so he asked me what I had planned for my birthday. I heard him blowing smoke out of his mouth and that caused a flashback to when he used to smoke and cut up work while I sat in the kitchen with him. Telling him I didn’t have anything planned, but knowing Hershey she’d find something for us to do on our birthday, he laughed telling me he knew. I asked him how he and his baby were doing while looking at the 16x20 inch picture my father had blown up of Jordan, before they buried him.
“She’s doing alright. I’ve been chilling, thinking about you and our baby, God bless the dead. There’s not a day that goes by that I don’t think about our lil man. I miss you Diva,” he said. Truth be told, I missed him too. The way he made me laugh and smile, the way he held me and stared at me when he thought I was asleep. “I miss you too Kevin. I know that bitch Gina’s happy we lost our son,” I told him wiping the tears from my face. “If you haven’t heard, Gina is long gone. My fam took care of that. I have my daughter and she lives with me,” he let me know. I didn’t know all that. The only thing I’d heard was Gina skipped town. I asked Kevin what he was doing that night. Kevin was like a drug I needed and he knew it.
“I’m chilling in the crib hoping I could be doing you, why?” he asked chuckling. I rolled my eyes while laughing at his crazy ass. “I want to see you,” I told him throwing on my BEBE sweat suit and flip-flops. I grabbed my Roberto Cavalli shades and my Gucci bag.
“I’m still here, you know where to find me,” he said. I could hear the smile in his voice. I told him I was on my way, hung up, and calling a cab. “Happy birthday Princess,” both my father and Mary said when I walked in the living room. I said thank you while throwing my shades on; my father asked where I was off to. I told him I was going to Hershey’s house and I should be back in the morning. Everybody in the family knew how Sandy was. She thought we were still babies. My father laughed telling me he knew how she could be. He asked if I was taking my car.
“No I’m waiting for the cab, see you later,” I said hugging them and walking out the door to my cab. I was off to see my Kevin. When I got to Kevin’s house, I used the key he gave me a year ago. He was sitting on the sofa feeding the baby with a wife beater and basketball shorts on. She looked so much like him and our son that a tear came to my eye.
“Hi baby, she’s about to be done with the bottle,” he said. I sat down next to him and moved a piece of hair from her face. I just sat there staring at her thinking about what Jordan would’ve been doing at that point and what kind of baby he would’ve been.
“Don’t rush her,” I told him giving him a kiss on the cheek. He nodded his head towards the kitchen telling me there was something on the table waiting for me, while taking the bottle out her mouth. She was already half asleep. Kevin place her burp cloth on his shoulder and begun burping her. I walked into the kitchen and there were balloons with a large strawberry cheesecake on the table. There was a card and a long black jewelry box. I sat down on the chair and grabbed the card.
“Happy birthday my Diva, damn I’ve been around you for so long and now I finally get my chance to express my feelings to you instead of hiding my feeling from you. I love you baby. I never stopped and I never will. You’re my heart. Enjoy your B-day. I know you and Hershey are going to do it big!” I read the letter smiling. There was six thousand dollars in G stacks. I grabbed the long black box and walked into the living room. Kevin was coming out his second bedroom. “You like your gift?” he asked grinning then sitting down next to me. “Yea I like it, I didn’t get to open the box yet, but the cheese cake and card were nice, and the money didn’t hurt either. Thank you,” I said wrapping my arms around his neck. Our lips touched and we shared a long kiss that had my panties wet. I opened the box and there was a pink and blue diamond tennis bracelet with the matching necklace and pink diamond studs. “Thank you baby they’re beautiful,” I said turning around so he could put the necklace on my neck. I lifted my hair and he snapped the chain around my neck. I stood up and walked inside his room. He had remodeled the room. He put a king-sized bed inside that had two steps and he had put mirrors all around the walls near the bed. “Damn what’s up with all these mirrors?” I asked myself, laughing and looking at myself in the mirror that was near the bathroom door. Kevin walked behind me wrapping his arms around my waist and resting his chin on my shoulder.
“Don’t we look good together? And don’t pay attention to the mirrors,” he said reading my mind about the mirrors. He started kissing my shoulders, then my neck, and I closed my eyes.
“Yeah we look do look good together,” I said feeling his hand go down my spine. I turned around to face him and we kissed. The kiss felt so right and I wasn’t thinking about Eddie. I was in the arms of my first love. I laid on the bed with
Kevin on top of me and we undressed each other. Once we were naked, Kevin stood up to admire my body. He bent down and kissed my feet all the way up. He traced the bullet wound with his finger then kissed it. He took his time with me that night; we made love until the sun started coming up. We dozed off and two hours later, we were awakened by the baby crying.
“Baby go get the baby, I’ll go make her bottle,” I said climbing out the bed. I found Kevin’s robe and threw it on. I walked into the kitchen made her a bottle and walked into her room. She was looking around fussing. I picked her up, and my motherly instincts kicked in. “You’re wet pretty girl, that’s why you’re in here fussing,” I spoke to her as I change her pamper and sleeper. She was the prettiest baby I’d ever seen. Her big bright grey eyes looked at me then she showed me her gums with a big smile. I fed her the bottle as I sat in the rocking chair Kevin had in her lavender and pink room with cherry furniture. “I’m your brother’s mommy; his name was Jordan, he didn’t make it. I bet y’all would’ve been the best of friends,” I said wiping my eyes. I didn’t see Kevin standing near the door listening until he walked to me and took the baby out of my arms. She had already burped so he placed her inside her crib. “Come on baby, let’s get some sleep, Harmony isn’t going nowhere,” he said pulling me out of the room and into his room. I laid back down. Kevin went in the kitchen and I dozed back off while Kevin stayed in the kitchen cooking breakfast. I heard Kevin say, “Wake up sleepy head,” in my ear before kissing my forehead. I opened my eyes and looked at Kevin with a smile. He had the breakfast on a tray sitting on the bed. He had cut up fruit, with banana pancakes, cheese eggs, and grits with turkey links. “Thank you baby,” I said getting off the bed and going into the bathroom. I washed my face, brushed my teeth, and then threw my hair up in a ponytail. I heard my cell phone ringing “Make Me Better” by Fabulous and knew it was Eddie from his ringtone. I walked in the room and sat on the bed. Kevin fed me then removed the dishes. Walking out of the room, he stopped in the doorway.
“Yo answer your phone, that nigga been blowing up your phone all morning,” he said walking towards the kitchen. Eddie called three more times back to back. I told Kevin to shut up while throwing the pillow at him. He ran and jumped on the bed pinning me under him. “I'm a punk?” he asked looking into my eyes, and then he began kissing me. I moaned kissing him back.
“You know I love you right?” he asked licking the spot on my neck that made me weak. “Yeah I know you love me baby. I love you too, now go get the baby she’s whining,” I told him pushing him off me.
“So I'm not getting no booty before you leave?” he asked standing up. I shook my head no standing up from the bed and going into the bathroom. I jumped into the shower, washed my ass, and then got out. Kevin was sitting on the bed with Harmony. Kevin asked me when I was coming back. “When I'm done hanging with Hershey and spending this money,” I laughed throwing on my Coogi dress with the short sleeves and my pink Prada sneakers. I threw my hair in a neat bun and was good to go. “Hit me up when you’re done,” Kevin said walking me to the door after I grabbed my Gucci bag. “Alright babe. Bye Harmony, I'll see you later Princess,” I said kissing her chubby cheeks, then kissing Kevin.
Chapter 13
I called Hershey once I was halfway down the block and she picked up on the first ring.
“Happy birthday bitch,” we both said at the same time. “What are you doing? I hope you’re dressed because I'm walking towards your crib,” I said walking across the street. Hershey lived three blocks from Kevin. She told me she was ready and asked where I’d been because Eddie had been calling her phone nonstop all morning. Laughing at what she said, I told her I was at my baby daddy’s crib and for her to open the door. She buzzed me in the building and I walked up the three flights to her door. I knew Barkeem and Shakeem were in the house; the music was blasting at ten in the damn morning and you could smell the haze all the way downstairs. I knocked on the door and Shakeem open the door with his fine caramel self. He stood 6'3” with caramel smooth skin, hazel eyes, long curly hair that stayed in a ponytail or two braids, broad shoulders, and a nice build. His dimples always made me melt. He was a pretty boy and he knew it. “Happy birthday Diva,” he said wrapping those big arms around me. I smelled his Armani cologne. I told him thank you while stepping inside the weed filled house, looked at him, and could tell he was finally getting that paper. He walked deep into the apartment sitting down in the living room. I walked towards the back of the crib and Barkeem pulled me inside his room. “Bar what are you doing?” I asked looking at his chocolate self. “Happy birthday baby girl,” he said kissing my lips. I was shocked and I pulled back from him. “Thank you Bar, what was all that about?” I asked looking at him. He smirked licking his juicy lips at me. “I told you I was feeling you,” he told me. “No you didn't tell me that; you asked me when I was going to let you take me out. Stop mixing me up with your chicken heads,” I said laughing placing my hand on the doorknob to exit the room. “Barkeem Montel Jackson, let Diva out,” Hershey yelled from the other side of the door banging on it. He asked when I was going to let him take me out putting his hand on top of mine while I was holding the doorknob. I told him I’d let him know as I opened the door and he nodded his head. Hershey hugged me then rolled her eyes at Barkeem. “Don't be locking my homie in that stinking ass room,” she said and we both laughed and walked to the door. “Hershey you going to stop trying to play me, saying my full name and shit,” Barkeem said. Shakeem was sitting on the sofa cracking up. Hershey gave him the finger and we left out of the crib. We walked out of the building and the questions I knew were burning in Hershey’s head finally came out. She asked if Kevin and I made up and were playing house. I looked at her rolling my eyes and giving her the finger. I told her, “Don't play me bitch,” then told her he called me last night and wished me happy birthday. “We started talking and I went to see him.” We got inside a cab going to Soho in Manhattan. “So did you see the baby?” she asked giving me a b-day card from Sandy. “Hell yeah I saw her. She is so beautiful Hersh, you gotta see her. He’s got custody of her,” I said. Hershey looked at me and smiled. “Bitch you know you couldn't stay away from the dick,” she said laughing. “Whatever trick, he gave me this and six G's,” I said showing her my bracelet. “Damn bitch,” she said. I opened the card Sandy gave me and pulled out three G's. “Sandy is too much, I’ve got to call her,” I said, “You know she still thinks we’re babies,” Hershey said causing us both to laugh. We got out of the cab, done with shopping, and then we went to Sylvia’s.
Hershey thanked me for the Louis Vuitton bag I bought her with her spoiled ass. She knew I would buy it for her. “Bitch you stay holding out on me,” she said. “Whatever, I told you Kevin gave me six G's along with Sandy’s three, plus I had three on me when I left the crib. Bitch shut up, I didn't hear you say I was holding out on you when I got you that Louis Vuitton bag and those Louie V sneakers,” I bust out laughing. She always wanted to know how much money I had in my pocket but I didn’t mind. I shared everything with her besides my men. “You got me. I love you girl,” she said hugging me. Shit, her stuff alone ran me a good five G's but I didn't care, that was my ace boon coon. “I love you too and thank you for my charm bracelet,” I said shaking my wrist.
She had given me a custom-made 24-karat gold and platinum charm bracelet with both our names inside a heart. On the back, she had gotten “More than friends, we're sisters, and our bond can never be broken” engraved with the year we became friends. 1998. Then she had added a baby with blue diamonds and Jordan’s name on the back, a Gucci shoe charm, Prada bag charm, a Juicy Couture charm, a purple diamond D charm along with a pink H charm and a blue M charm for my father. I loved the bracelet. “You’re welcome trick. So now everybody’s gotta buy you a charm for your bracelet,” she said. We ordered our food and made plans for what we were going to do that night for our birthday. Once we were done eating, we grabbed all our bags and hailed a cab. Hershey bitched to me about not
driving my car, but she understood why I didn’t drive to Kevin’s crib in it. The car was bright as hell and it would’ve drawn attention that both Kevin and I didn’t need. The cab pulled up in front of her building. She grabbed her bags and got out and I told her to get ready before the cab pulled off.
“Hello?” I hit my Bluetooth.
“Where the fuck you at?” Eddie yelled into my ear. I rolled my eyes up in my head. I wasn’t about to let him ruin my happy moment or my damn birthday with his bullshit. “When you call my motherfucking phone say hello or happy fucking birthday,” I said yelling back at him. The cabbie looked at me through his mirror and I rolled my eyes at the driver. Eddie was pissed off. It seemed like he always knew when I was up to no good. He told me to cut the bullshit, how he knew I wasn’t with Hershey all fucking day, and he been calling both of our phones all fucking morning. I smiled to myself as I sat in the back of the cab listening to him rant and rave on and on about shit. I let him know me and Hershey left our phones in the house when we went out to eat breakfast with her sister, lying of course. I didn’t need to explain shit to Eddie; he wasn’t my damn daddy. “Diva don't make me fuck you up,” he said before I hung up on his stupid ass. “This nigga is bugged out, talking about fucking somebody up,” I thought to myself.