A Summer to Remember

by Sue Moorcroft

  While Clancy gazed at him in astonishment, he went on, explaining in the awkward way parents did when they were conscious of childish ears listening, that Daisy was still going to see lots of Granny and Grandad because she’d go to their house each day while he was at work until she started school in September, but Aaron had very kindly said Lee and Daisy could live with him and Nelson for a while.

  Clancy nodded along, trying to hide her dismay. Despite her resolution not to expect to move in with Aaron, utilising his Wi-Fi to create the village website had provided her with a refuge. She’d been at his place a lot. It would be completely different with a brother and a four-year-old niece in residence. The tops of her ears felt hot just to think about people being elsewhere in the house when she and Aaron …

  Lee looked uncomfortable, as if reading her thoughts. ‘I hope we won’t cramp yours and Aaron’s style—’

  Daisy tugged his hand, evidently tiring of adult conversation. ‘Come on, Daddy, we promised to take Nelson down onto Zig-zag Beach.’

  Lee murmured a gentle reproach about interrupting when he was talking, but Daisy was already turning away. ‘Bye, Clancy. Can I hold Nelson’s lead, Daddy?’

  Clancy pinned on a smile as she waved. ‘Bye, Daisy. Have a lovely time on the beach.’

  When she got up to go a few minutes later, she left four pounds on the table for the cappuccino. She found she didn’t want it on the house.

  Despondent, she drifted across the clifftop grass, gazing at all the different houses and cottages of the village like a cutesy picture on a jigsaw puzzle. She turned in to Long Lane, wandering into Aaron’s garden to hook up with his Wi-Fi and check her email. She wasn’t sure whether it was reasonable to hope he’d sent her a message explaining the Lee and Daisy situation, but somehow she’d feel better if he had.

  He hadn’t.

  Clancy gazed at the garden he’d made between his back door and the sea. The plants he’d called ‘architectural’ in geometric-shaped beds amongst the paving. The bench that he’d made from the back doorstep of a falling-down cottage. The bank of wildflowers he’d grown to blend his garden in with the wildness of the clifftop. She had to swallow very hard. She thought about taking advantage of being on his Wi-Fi to ring him. Hearing his voice might make her feel better.

  But, no, he’d be working. She was not going to make her happiness and wellbeing his responsibility.

  It was as Clancy was leaving the garden that she bumped into Yvonne coming in. ‘Oh,’ they both said, halting.

  A variety of emotions flitted over Yvonne’s face. ‘I was looking for Lee.’

  ‘I saw him and Daisy walking Nelson,’ Clancy said, not feeling equal to a conversation with Aaron’s mum. ‘I just stepped into the garden for the Wi-Fi.’ She made a tentative move to edge past Yvonne who, she thought, was not a bad person. Just guilty of a monocular view of any situation involving her sons.

  Yvonne moved too, making it harder to pass. ‘Clancy, can I ask you something?’

  ‘Of course,’ Clancy answered politely, hoping it wasn’t going to be anything about the present whereabouts of her cousin. In her current low state, a conversation about that would just about reduce her to tears.

  A smile from the older woman. ‘You’re aware of what’s going on between Lee and Alice?’ She said ‘Alice’ as if she didn’t even want the word in her mouth.

  ‘I don’t know,’ said Clancy. ‘It depends what is going on, I suppose. If anything is.’

  Yvonne looked wrong-footed, her complexion pasty, lines of anxiety gathering around her eyes. ‘Well … I know Alice is your cousin,’ Yvonne said, at length. ‘I just thought that maybe, as you’re seeing Aaron now, that you might feel—’ She paused, as if hoping Clancy would fill in the gap.

  Clancy stayed stubbornly silent.

  ‘—you could tell me what’s going on,’ Yvonne finished in a rush.

  Clancy turned sideways and made a more determined attempt to edge past. ‘It’s not my business,’ she said flatly. ‘Sorry.’

  ‘Oh, I’m not trying to interfere,’ Yvonne called after her. ‘I didn’t mean to suggest that.’

  Clancy hesitated. Stopped. Went back. ‘I know you’re only looking out for your son,’ she said, trying to be reasonable and pleasant. ‘But Alice is thirty-four. I suppose Lee’s around the same age. Even if they’re heading for disaster, I’m afraid I can’t help you because I don’t know anything.’

  A tear trembled on Yvonne’s lashes. ‘I know what you’re saying,’ she muttered. ‘But you’re not Alice’s mother. It’s easier for you.’

  ‘Is it?’ asked Clancy tiredly. She took her leave from Yvonne politely and walked back down Long Lane towards the Roundhouse. She was so sick of the day that she got into her Beemer without going indoors, did a U-turn in the lane and drove out of the village, swooping down Long Climb with a belly like lead.

  She parked at the side of the road at the top of the hill in Old Hunstanton and walked down through the gardens into Hunstanton itself. She bought a cup of coffee from a catering van and jumped down onto the beach to sit with her back against the concrete wall to drink it, watching children build sandcastles and gulls wheel over tourists to see who they could mug for a muffin.

  When the coffee was gone, she climbed a few steps and walked along the promenade until she reached the caravan park beside the funfair, and then she just carried on, all the way to Heacham. At a loss what to do when she got there, she walked back again, flopped into her car and drove back to Nelson’s Bar, her mind no more settled than when she’d started out.

  The village waited beneath an endless blue dome of early evening sky. When she’d parked the car by the hedge she went inside.

  Hugo was sitting on the sofa staring blankly at the TV. Clancy didn’t look at him. He didn’t look at her either but said, offhandedly, ‘Lover boy rang for you.’

  ‘Thanks.’ Clancy felt a small lift of her heart and went over to the phone, not caring that Hugo was there to listen.

  The ring tone sounded six times before Aaron answered.

  ‘Hey,’ she said. ‘It’s me.’

  ‘Hey,’ he said, sounding distracted. ‘Can I ring you back? Mum’s really upset—’

  ‘Sure.’ She waited to see if he’d say anything else, wondering whether her scratchy conversation with Yvonne earlier was what had upset her. When he didn’t add anything she said, ‘Speak to you later,’ and replaced the phone in its cradle. Realising she hadn’t eaten since breakfast, she crossed to the fridge for the chicken breast she’d put there. Miracles, it was where she’d left it, and she wrapped it in foil with a slice of onion and shoved it in the oven. She’d make a salad to eat with it when it was cooked.

  Before she could go up to her room, the landline rang again, burbling from its holster on the wall.

  Clancy picked it up quickly. But, rather than it being Aaron calling back as promised, a strange noise came down the line. ‘Hello?’ Clancy said tentatively. Then she thought she caught her name. ‘Sorry, I can’t make out …’ Then her stomach did a slow flip-flop as she recognised that the strange noise was crying. And she knew the voice. ‘Will?’

  A quavering sob answered her.

  ‘Will,’ she said again, more urgently. ‘What on earth’s the matter?’

  ‘Hospital,’ he choked out. ‘Renée’s really bad. Monty and Asila too. This moron in a lorry …’ He gulped, let out a high-pitched keening noise. ‘I was driving, Clancy. We were coming off the M11. He just changed lanes and left me nowhere to go. I’m at the hospital and they’re all more hurt than me. I don’t know what to do.’

  ‘Hang on,’ she found herself saying, because she always knew what to do. The hard shit. ‘I’ll come. Which hospital? Homerton? I’m on my way.’

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  Aaron had walked into his garden after walking Nelson to find his mum there in tears.

  ‘Oh, Aaron!’ she sobbed as soon as she saw him. ‘Whatever’s he done?’

  ‘Who?�
�� he demanded sharply but he didn’t really have to ask. It must be Lee. A cold sweat broke over him. ‘Come indoors and tell me what’s happened.’

  He had to get Yvonne a glass of water because she was crying so hard she couldn’t form words he could understand. Nelson sat in his basket, looking worried and unhappy. When the phone rang, Aaron picked it up in case it was his brother. Clancy’s voice spoke to him and he rapped out, ‘Can I ring you back? Mum’s really upset.’ Though he would love to have talked to her because he’d been ringing the Roundhouse to try and tell her about Lee and Daisy moving in, he obviously had A Situation to deal with first. He replaced the phone, aware she’d put down at her end too abruptly for comfort.

  He put an arm around his mother. ‘So, what’s going on?’

  ‘This note,’ Yvonne gulped. ‘Lee’s not here and I’m worried to death.’ She wiped her eyes. ‘I was cleaning his room at our house, after he’d packed up and moved here. I found this under his bed.’ Dully, she held out a crumpled sheet ripped from a spiral notepad.

  Aaron, heart sinking, plucked the sheet from his mother’s fingers, reading its few lines in Lee’s loopy handwriting.

  I am tormented. Feel hopeless.

  Hopeless.

  Hopeless.

  Slowly, he folded the sheet up again, noticing, absently, that now his fingers were shaking. ‘And you haven’t seen him?’

  Yvonne shook her head. ‘His van’s not here and there’s no sign of him or Daisy. He’s not answering his phone. Oh, Aaron.’ She lifted a tear-stained face. ‘It’s not … it’s not a suicide note is it?’

  ‘There’s no need to think that,’ Aaron reassured her automatically, even though his stomach was burning with dread because he’d wondered the same thing. ‘It doesn’t say anything to that effect. I think—’

  Then the kitchen door flew back on its hinges, making Nelson erupt from his basket with a cacophonous protest. When he saw Jordy in the doorway, Nelson paused, though he continued to growl in his throat.

  Aaron put a hand on his collar. ‘What’s up with you, dog? Don’t you recognise Jordy?’

  Jordy stepped indoors, shutting the door with a bang, his dark eyes fixed on Aaron. ‘You knew all along didn’t you?’

  ‘What?’ demanded Yvonne, looking from one to the other.

  Aaron met his cousin’s glare, pretty sure he knew what was coming, but he still asked, ‘About what?’

  Jordy took a step nearer, making Nelson growl again. ‘That Harry thinks he’s gay with that damned Rory kid.’

  Nelson’s growls rose and Aaron stroked his head. ‘It isn’t the right time for this, Jordy. Have you seen Lee today?’

  ‘Did you?’ Jordy shouted, his face red and sweating.

  Obviously, Jordy wasn’t going to answer Aaron’s question until Aaron answered Jordy’s.

  ‘Yes. Harry is what he is, just like you’re what you are and I’m what I am. He has a lot of feelings for Rory. There’s nothing wrong with it.’

  ‘If there’s nothing wrong with it then why’s he been hiding it?’ Jordy spat.

  Aaron considered his answer. ‘Because he knows you’re homophobic’ didn’t seem right. He chose a different gambit. ‘He’s still the kid you’ve always loved. You don’t want to lose his respect, do you?’

  Redder and angrier than ever, Jordy snapped, ‘Haven’t seen Lee for days,’ and slammed back out, leaving Aaron shaken and Nelson hurling himself at the door with a volley of barks.

  ‘Oh, dear,’ sniffed Yvonne. ‘I’ve got to say it’s crossed my mind about Harry and Rory. Now Jordy’s found out I’ll bet he’s had a go at poor Harry.’

  ‘Yeah.’ Aaron ran his fingers through his hair, exhausted by the dramas enacted in his kitchen this evening. He had the urge to speak to Harry but the youngster could be anywhere and Aaron had a crisis to deal with. ‘Let’s try and track Lee down.’ Aaron began to ring around, drawing a blank with Mick, Rick and Nick and everyone he could think of. He rang the Roundhouse, because Clancy might know something. She could have been to the cottage to work on the website and seen Lee and Daisy. And then there was another Roundhouse occupant who might know something too. Alice. He got only the engaged signal. He tried again.

  Engaged again.

  And again.

  He looked at his mum. ‘I’m going to go down and see if I can talk to Alice. If they have been seeing each other she might know where he is.’

  Yvonne couldn’t become any paler, but she almost visibly stiffened her upper lip. ‘I suppose so.’ Then, quietly, ‘Thank you, Aaron.’

  Aaron picked up his keys. ‘Is Dad on evening shift? I’ll walk you home so you’ll be with Aunt Norma, OK? Then I’ll come back to yours when I’ve been to the Roundhouse.’ He had high hopes of Clancy being there. He should have managed to make the scale of the situation clear to her before letting her hang up. What he’d said must’ve sounded like a brush-off.

  ‘I can walk home on my own. You just go ahead.’ Yvonne gave Aaron a hug. He clipped on Nelson’s lead, which made the dog look cheerful for the first time since all the human drama, and then he strode out of the door behind her.

  Before long he found himself jogging, Nelson extending his stride like a little pony to keep up. Aaron was so keyed up by the time he reached the Roundhouse that he rang the doorbell and used his key to go in without waiting to see if he was welcome. Then he paused and stepped back to look out at the lane behind him.

  Clancy’s blue BMW wasn’t there.

  He hurried in to find Hugo eating a pie from a plate on his lap in front of the telly.

  ‘Is Clancy here? Or Alice?’ Aaron demanded, noticing that, behind Hugo, the phone hung from its wall holster, which would explain the constant engaged signal.

  Hugo stared at him balefully. ‘What do you want with Alice?’

  Aaron strode in, grabbed the TV remote from where it lay beside Hugo and switched off the set. Then he took Hugo’s plate off him and deposited it on a nearby table. ‘This is important!’ he snapped. ‘I need to talk to Alice.’

  To his disbelief, Hugo’s face began to crumple. ‘Alice has left me,’ he said pathetically. ‘She’s packed up and gone.’

  For several seconds, Aaron just stared at Hugo in horror. If Alice had gone and Lee and Daisy had gone … the obvious conclusion was that they’d all left together. Sooner or later, it would blow up in Lee’s face and who knew what would happen? Aaron dropped down into an armchair. ‘Shit.’ Then, with compunction, ‘Sorry, Hugo.’ He wasn’t sure if he was commiserating about Hugo being left or apologising for storming in.

  ‘Thank you,’ Hugo said morosely.

  For a minute, Aaron’s thoughts were taken up with how he was going to break the news to his mother. Then they circled around. ‘I presume Clancy’s not here? I see her car’s gone.’

  ‘She got a phone call and went,’ Hugo replied.

  Aaron rose. ‘I might be able to get her on her mobile if she’s left the village. Do you know where she’s gone?’

  ‘To be with Will.’ Hugo turned his small dark eyes on Aaron. He had pie crumbs in his beard. ‘She packed a bag and went. It’s been quite the day for it.’ Then, perhaps seeing by Aaron’s expression that now was not the time to muck him about, he expanded his explanation. ‘There’s been an accident. Clancy left to be with him. I heard her say Homerton Hospital. Some of the friends she used to work with were in the crash too.’

  ‘Right,’ Aaron said numbly. His stomach felt as if he were tumbling down a lift shaft. After taking his leave from Hugo, he jogged back up Long Lane, pausing only when Nelson dragged at his lead in a polite hint that he’d actually like to stop and cock his leg.

  When he reached De Silva House he went straight in, finding Yvonne and Aunt Norma drinking tea in the kitchen. Yvonne leapt up as soon as Aaron appeared.

  ‘Hugo says Alice has left him,’ Aaron said, slipping an arm around his mum. ‘I don’t think we should read too much into it but …’

  ‘But Lee’s vanished w
ith Daisy at exactly the same time.’ Yvonne sat back down suddenly, lifting piteous eyes to his. ‘What are we going to do?’

  Aaron sat down across the table. ‘I don’t think there’s anything we can do. In a way, I hope he is with Alice.’

  Yvonne’s eyebrows shot up. ‘Why?’

  Aunt Norma was the one to answer. Her plaster cast had been taken off now but she was still walking with sticks. ‘Because if he’s run off with Alice, then presumably he’s not feeling suicidal, despite that note.’

  Yvonne made a strangled sound, clamping a hand over her eyes. ‘I just want to know he’s safe.’

  ‘Me, too.’ Aaron patted his mother’s arm. ‘I’ll keep trying his mobile, and if I don’t get him I’ll send a text asking him to get in touch with one of us ASAP.’

  ‘Thank you,’ Yvonne sniffed.

  As soon as Aaron got home, he called Lee’s mobile, receiving an ‘unavailable’ message and an invitation to leave voicemail. He waited impatiently for the beep. ‘Lee, this is Aaron. Can you get in touch with me, or with Mum or Dad, as soon as? It’s important.’ He decided not to say that everyone was worried about him in case that made him remain silent. He texted a similar message for good measure, then he abandoned everything Lee-related for a moment and called Clancy’s mobile.

  That call went to voicemail too.

  All of a sudden, his legs felt like lead. He tried again with exactly the same result, then sent a text. Are you OK? Hugo tells me there’s been an accident. Please contact me as soon as you’re able. xxx

  He fed Nelson and fetched a guitar, settling at the kitchen table, his mobile phone in front of him and close to the landline phone too, waiting for one of them to ring. It was hard to play with sweaty, trembling fingers though.

  Later, at Homerton University Hospital, Clancy was exhausted. Several members of staff had suggested that she could go home and rest, that her friends were in good hands, but still she continued to sit on one of a collection of chairs just inside the main door. Over the past hours she’d acted as the information hub for the families of Will, Asila, Monty and even Renée. Now her energy was leaching away and it was dawning on her that she had no obvious place to go. She couldn’t make her tired mind work around the logistics of booking a hotel room online now it was past midnight on Wednesday, in case it resulted in her getting a room for Thursday night, not tonight.