Say You Crave Me (Full Moon, #4)

by Van Mol, Stefanie

  He gets up from the bed, and for a moment I’m afraid he’s still naked. But when the sheet disappears, I see that fortunately, he has already put on his boxer shorts. He comes toward me, and I stand still, nailed to the ground. The look in his eyes causes lust to puddle in my belly. How is it possible that with just a glance he manages to set me on fire?

  When he stands in front of me, I immediately forget the smell of the coffee. His unique, masculine fragrance penetrates my nostrils, and when he comes close, I feel the warmth of his skin through my bathrobe. He puts his arm around my waist and pulls me against him. “Had a nice shower?”

  “Yes.” I sigh. “Max, can we talk about last night?”

  He brings his mouth to mine and whatever I wanted to say vanishes immediately. “No, Valérie. Now, we are going to eat. After that, we can talk as much as you like.”

  Mmm, maybe that’s not such a bad idea. When my stomach grumbles with hunger, we both laugh. Max kisses me again. “I think your stomach agrees with me.”

  “I think so, too.”

  I take a plate from the cart and choose what to eat. When my plate is filled with a chocolate croissant, an egg, and a bagel, I carefully I take a seat on the edge of the mattress and place the plate on the bedside table next to me. I take the croissant and bite it. I can’t suppress my moan. It’s still warm and melts in my mouth. I enjoy the taste until I can feel Max’s gaze burning into me.

  I look up and see that he is indeed staring at me. He has a strange expression in his eyes, and my moans have not left him unmoved judging by the bulge in his boxer shorts.

  “Sorry,” I say softly, and start to blush.

  His gaze gets dark when he slowly crawls toward me over the mattress. With his thumb, he strokes a piece of chocolate away from the corner of my mouth. My eyes don’t let go of his gaze while I watch him bring it to his mouth and lick the piece of chocolate off the top. Lust rushes through me, and I have to squeeze my legs together to relieve the pressure. He smiles his wicked smile at me because he knows exactly what he is doing.

  “Best taste ever, you, mixed with chocolate.”

  I shyly lower my gaze. After everything he did with me last night, I shouldn’t be ashamed at all. But maybe that’s because it’s morning now and I realize that the night is over. Max growls before he pushes my chin up and kisses me roughly.

  “Eat first; then we can talk.”

  I give him a small smile and eat my breakfast. After the long night, I’m starving. Not only are the croissants delicious, the egg and toast taste so good. It’s clear that I must be very hungry after our sex marathon, when even these simple things taste so good. When my glass of fruit juice is empty, I dare to look up to Max. He is just wiping his mouth with a napkin. Now comes the part I am afraid of.

  “You have to understand that I can’t start a relationship with you, Max. This is just sex; nothing else.”

  He looks at me angrily. His mouth, which just laughed radiantly, turns into a short line. “Why?”

  I can’t tell him the real reason, so I have to try to make it clear in a different way. I can’t lose my heart to him again. The last time I did that, I almost went under. A second time I wouldn’t survive.

  “Because I am here for my job, Max. I worked hard to get where I am now. I can’t afford to let my boss know. That would be the end of my career, and I’m too happy at my job to lose it already.”

  “So you’re avoiding this with us because you think they’ll fire you for it?”

  “I know it’s hard for you to understand, but my job is very important to me.”

  He looks at me piercingly. He is quiet for a while, and I hope he won’t make things even more difficult for me than they already are. I know I cannot resist him, so I am making the only proposal I can offer him now. “No one needs to know what we do in the evening in our hotel room; nobody has anything to do with that. I can spend every night in your bed, Max. We are two adults; no one else needs to say what we can and cannot do. I just can’t put my job at risk. But if you don’t like that, I do understand.”

  He keeps looking at me intensely, thinking about my proposal. “What happens when your assignment is over?”

  “Then I go back home, and you and I can continue with our lives.”

  I expect him to send me away, but eventually, he says, “I’ll take what you are willing to give me for the time being, but listen carefully to me, Valérie. I want to apologize already because one day I will tell the whole world what you mean to me. Because you are it for me; I don’t want anyone else.”

  My ears buzz from everything he just said. A few things happen at the same time. First of all, I realize that he has thought about this. Secondly, he speaks about a future that goes beyond the duration of my assignment here and thirdly my heart opens, and I fall in love again with the Max who had abandoned me all those years ago. The man in front of me is not the tough lead singer of Full Moon, but Max the teenager I used to know, who also managed to win me over with a few words.

  As if he could read my thoughts, he laughs and then smirks at me. “I can handle anything, whatever it takes to keep you with me. I lost you once; this time I won’t let you go. I will make sure that you don’t want to leave after your assignment. I give you my word.”

  Incredible. He has no intention of listening to me even a little bit. “I’ve already told you, Max. This is about my job, and it is very important to me. This,” I point with my finger between him and me, “is not allowed to leave this hotel room. Promise me that.”

  He combs his hands through his hair. “Why don’t you want to be seen with me?”

  “That’s not what it’s all about, Max. This is not about you, but about me. Promise it to me, or I will leave now.”

  He mumbles something that sounds like “unbearable” and finally nods. But something in me says that I don’t yet know what I’ve started.

  TONIGHT IS THE FIRST concert I will not attend backstage. To the great annoyance of Max. He is terrified that something will go wrong.

  “What on earth could go wrong? Your fans are there too, aren’t they safe?”

  “No, that’s not how I mean it. But I know how wild things can sometimes get during our concerts. I won’t feel at ease for a moment on stage if I don’t know you’re safely backstage.”

  “Max, you’ve been doing it without me for years. That is not going to change at all now.” I look at my watch and see that it is time to get ready. “I’m going to get ready now. You have to be in the concert hall in fifteen minutes.”

  I get out of bed and walk toward the bathroom when Max puts his arm around my waist, throws me on the bed and lies on top of me. With both hands, he holds my hands next to my head. He looks at me with his intense gaze. “Promise me that you will be careful. If anything happens to you, I will never forgive myself.”

  I try to tear my hands loose from his grip, but he doesn’t move an inch. “Max, I promise. Now let go of me, you have to get ready. What will the band say if you arrive late?”

  He growls before he lowers his head and pushes his lips hard on mine. My resistance to get loose stops immediately. He knows perfectly how to play my body to silence me. I still can’t do anything about it. Regardless of the number of times I have already resolved not to let myself be influenced in this way, every time I break he touches me, caresses me, or kisses me. When he finally breaks the kiss, he looks at me again. I give him the words he wants to hear.

  “I will be careful, Max. I promise.”

  He lets me go, gets up, and then extends his hand to me to help me stand up. When I stand, he kisses me again and then pushes me toward the bathroom. “Go fast now, before I change my mind about it and throw you back on the bed.”

  “Then you would be too late to the concert yourself; we can’t do that to your fans.”

  “If you lie naked in my bed, that’s the last thing I’ll be thinking of.”

  “Then I’d better hurry.”

  I close and lock the bathroom door
behind me. This way he can no longer be tempted. Because I’m sure if he enters the bathroom while I’m naked in the shower, he won’t be in time for the concert. When I have finished washing and dressing, I go back to the room. Max has already left and that gives me some time to go to my room. When I go outside, I almost run into Jolene.

  “Wow, you’re in a hurry,” she says cheerfully.

  “Sorry, I didn’t see you. Can I do something for you?”

  “I was looking for Max; I thought this was his room.”

  My cheeks turn red, and Jolene laughs at me with an omniscient grin on her face. “Ah, I see he was able to convince you anyway.”

  “I, um, well... it’s actually like this...”

  She puts her hand on my arm and waits for me to look at her. “Your secret is safe with me.”

  The breath I didn’t know I had held comes out in one rush of air.

  “Thank you, Jolene. I really appreciate that. Max is already on his way to the concert hall.”

  “Okay, will I see you after the concert?”

  “Absolutely. And thanks again.”

  OF COURSE, I’VE BEEN to a concert before, but I never expected it to be so different now that I’m watching Full Moon. That I know the singer of the band in a very personal way may have something to do with it.

  The beat of the music has an effect on my body and although I should be thinking about my work, I can’t help it when my body starts to move to the beat of the music. Before I know it, I’m just one of the many fans who has come to this concert instead of a journalist who’s here to work.

  For a moment I can forget everything. My head is empty. Even though there are thousands of fans, it feels like I’m all alone here. I dance with all the energy I have in me and empty my head.

  When the concert is over, I stand quietly in the crowd, waiting for everyone to leave. The hall is almost empty, and I’m with the last fans who go outside. The group of girls in front of me are also completely in the trance of the concert. They don’t pay attention to me.

  When I step outside through the exit, I want to turn right to go to the backstage area when I suddenly feel a familiar arm around my waist that pulls me back inside. Even before I can say a word, Max’s mouth is on mine. He demands access with his tongue, and I gladly let him in. The adrenaline of the concert is still raging through me.

  With my hands I stroke through Max’s hair, which is still wet from sweat from the concert he just gave. When his mouth finally lets go of mine, we are both panting and stare at each other.

  “Do you have any idea how sexy you looked while dancing? It took every effort in me to remember my lyrics when I knew that you were somewhere in between the fans.”

  I grab his T-shirt with my fist and pull him back to me. When I look over his shoulder, I see that we are the only ones left in the concert hall. I bring my mouth to his ear.

  “Has one of your fangirls ever seduced you for a quickie in the empty concert hall?”

  His tormented moan sounds in my ear, and I giggle like an innocent teenage girl. He kisses my neck and continues his path to my earlobe.

  “You will become the death of me. But no, I can’t say I’ve ever had that privilege.”

  He keeps kissing my neck, farther down until he arrives at my chest. With both his hands he squeezes my breasts, and that touch alone awakens a fire inside of me. And I know that I want him, that I want to throw aside all caution for one evening. My head is empty, and I haven’t thought of my job all evening, only about him.

  “I want you, Max. Right here and right now.”

  His head comes up, and I see his eyes sparkle.

  “You know that the crew is coming in to clean up right away?”

  I look back raising my eyebrow in challenge and show him that I am not afraid of that. “Then you better be fast.”

  His gaze remains on me as if he’s trying to assess whether I’m sure. He keeps his eyes on me while his hand caresses my leg, farther and farther up until he reaches the hem of my skirt. I bite my lip when he strokes my panties with his thumb. Yes, I want this. I need this.

  “Jesus, Valérie. You are soaking wet.”

  Suddenly everything seems to be moving in hyper speed. Before I know it I hear a tear, and he has my torn panties in his hands. He tucks them into his pocket before he turns me around.

  “Hands against the wall, legs wide,” he growls.

  Oh God, I didn’t think I could, but I get hotter because of his demanding words. It is a miracle that I can stand up. And then I hear his zipper opening, and his dick pushes against my opening.

  “Hold on tight, Valérie.”

  With those words, he pushes himself in to the root. The sensation is enormous, and he keeps his word. Like a crazed man, he begins to pump in and out of me. As strange as it sounds, the fact that we are both fully dressed makes it all the more exciting. Someone could come in at any time, and it would be all too clear what we are doing.

  But, at the moment, that only adds to the most erotic experience of my whole life. His hand disappears under my skirt, and his thumb caresses my clit while he keeps pounding in and out of me.

  “Let it go, Valérie.”

  And I do. With a scream, I fall apart. I feel him grow inside me and two thrusts later he also comes, deep inside me. For a moment, we stand like this, both panting to catch our breath. When he finally withdraws, I shudder at the loss of our contact and the cold wind that hits me in the hottest spot on my body.

  Max turns me around and pushes his mouth on mine. “That was...”

  I laugh at him and see that this was as intense for him as it was for me. “Intense? Unforgettable?”

  “Exactly.”

  12

  Valérie

  The past three days there has been a concert every evening, so I’ve hardly seen Max. Of course, we still spent the nights together in his or my bed. It is bizarre how in such a short time I have gotten used to falling asleep in Max’s arms. I don’t know if there’s anyone else from the band, beside Jolene, who knows what’s going on between us. But I’m sure none of them will say anything even if they know it anyway. Our secret is safe with them.

  That’s something I’ve learned here in a short time. This band is more than just a group of friends. They are always there for each other. Whatever the difficult circumstances, no matter what, they stick together.

  Tonight there is no concert, but an evening and a day of rest for the band, and I would be lying if I said that the nerves aren’t searing through me for what awaits me. For the last three days, Max has told me that he was going to take me somewhere. And every time he looked at me it was as if he expected me to protest. But I need to be alone with him for a while. Just for a day. Just the two of us. I am positive that he will make sure that we are alone and that I don’t have to worry about any reporters who can spot us.

  Time flies and my time here is getting shorter and shorter. Therefore, I am happy with every moment I can spend with him. I already know that my heart will break when I have to go home, but I want this anyway. I want to enjoy every second and not think about the consequences. For once in my life, I want to be the one who enjoys her time without thinking.

  This morning we had breakfast together with the band, and after that, we both returned to our rooms. Max didn’t give anything away, only that I had to wear comfortable clothes. I stood in front of my closet deciding what clothes said “comfortable.” I chose tight jeans and a red top. Now I am standing in front of my collection of shoes, and I have no idea which ones to put on. My hand slides over my lone silver shoe. I still haven’t been able to get it in my heart to throw it away. When I asked at the reception desk at the hotel, they had not found the other shoe, so I should say goodbye to one of my favorite pairs.

  There’s a knock on the door, and when I open it, Max is there looking almost good enough to eat. He wears loose jeans that hug his buttocks in the right way. The top buttons of his black shirt are open, and I see a sliver of his tanned
skin. No matter how often I see him, I still can’t believe that he wants to spend time with me. Women fall at his feet by the thousands, and yet he wants me.

  “Ready to leave?” His gaze wanders over my body, and I feel the warmth between us rise as he looks at me. “If we don’t leave quickly, there is a good chance we won’t leave the room all day.”

  “All I have to do is put on a pair of shoes, and then I’m done.”

  His gaze wanders to my bare feet and then back to me. He gets a box from behind his back that I hadn’t noticed before. “Maybe this will help you out?”

  I take the box carefully out of his hands and take it over to the bed. I hear him close the door behind me and follow me to the bed. I open the lid of the box and gasp for breath when I see what’s inside.

  “How... When... Where...?”

  I stare at the silver shoe that I thought I would never see again. Many people don’t understand the relationship I have with my shoes, but this pair is very special to me. I bought them for myself with the first paycheck I got when I started working for Hard Beats.

  “When I saw how longingly you looked at that shoe, I knew they were special to you. I’ve kept it all this time but waited for the right moment to give it to you.”

  Carefully, I put the shoe back in the box and turn around to look at him. I put my arms around his waist and push my nose against his chest. “Thank you. You have no idea what they mean to me.”

  He kisses me on the top of my head. “I am glad to have kept it for you.”

  He looks at his watch. “But if we don’t go now, we’ll be too late.”

  I lick his neck and stroke his belly. “Are you sure we don’t have a little time to spare?” I ask as seductively as possible.

  He growls and presses his mouth on mine. Our tongues caress each other, and I taste his unique taste. “It’s not that I don’t want you...” He pushes his erection against me to prove it. “Believe me, but if we don’t go now, we’re going to be late, and I’ve organized a fantastic day for you.” He kisses me one more time. “I want to prove to you that this is not just about sex, Valérie.”