Golden Glories

by Gerald Lopez

  We left, and when I looked back, monkey boy had his mask on and was dancing around again while Miss Lucy played the organ.

  “Imagine running into them here,” Charity said. “And there was no way anyone would’ve recognized Miss Lucy.”

  “A detective should have,” I said. “We’re supposed to notice a person’s walk, and even scent to give us a clue.”

  “You recognized Buck and he had a mask on,” Charity said.

  “I never forget a nice ass or a sexy pair of feet,” I said, then chuckled along with Charity.

  Alex was lost taking pictures again. I didn’t blame him since it was an interesting spot. We were halfway over the water. There were shops and restaurants on both sides of the—closed off to traffic—street. To my right was an interesting open air restaurant. A man in a Hawaiian shirt and flip-flops was sitting on a stool singing the Jimmy Buffet song “Margaritaville”. My eyes had only just focused on the man’s tan feet when I felt someone tugging on my collar, dragging me away.

  “Two men are plenty for you, marine boy,” Alex said in my ear.

  “Hey, I was just looking,” I said.

  “Well keep your eyes looking straight ahead for now,” Alex said, then chuckled and his blue eyes lit up.

  “No one else even comes close to you and Forrest,” I said, then smiled, but Alex was already busily taking pictures again.

  “Men are very visual creatures,” Charity said to me. “That’s just the way it is—human nature. And no matter how people try, it doesn’t do any good attempting to change human nature.”

  “Nope,” I said.

  Charity swung her hips to the music from Margaritaville and butted against me.

  “That’s a nice hotel,” I said, as I looked across the street at a two-story hotel made of wood and glass. Below and around it were various shops, including an ice cream parlor.

  “Mmm,” Charity said, “ice cream sounds good—maybe later. The hotel Sassy mentioned is up ahead.”

  At the end of the street, on the corner, and across from the attached dock slash pier was the two-story hotel. So far, things had been shockingly quiet and calm, even with the surprise of running into Buck, Miss Lucy, and Ginger.

  But the quiet and peace had just run out. The sound of people angrily shouting emanated from the hotel as we got closer. Something was definitely amiss.

  Chapter 4

  The Sound of Trouble

  I HEARD THE sound of people arguing coming from the two-story hotel. Rushing into the wood paneled lobby, I spotted Diesel’s very pregnant wife—the tall, blonde… Ursula Andress in her youth look-alike—Lily May. She had just slapped someone that was working the front desk, and her hand was tightly gripping his collar. The man was about to make the biggest mistake in his life by trying to raise his hand.

  “Stop right there before you regret it!” I said. “You’re a dead man if you raise that fist any higher. And after that lady’s wife kills you, then I’ll put a real hurt on you.”

  The man backed down, and Lily May let him go and chuckled. Diesel looked my way and spoke.

  “Thanks, Layton.”

  “What’s the problem here?” I said, then spotted Sassy sitting on a sofa against the far wall. Alex and Charity were behind me.

  “This punk rented out our rooms, even though we prepaid,” Diesel said.

  “Ours too, Layton,” Sassy said.

  “What the hell is going on down here?” a man said from the stairs.

  I recognized the rough-looking, heavyset man with stringy, shoulder-length brown hair, and a five o’clock shadow. I’d last seen him talking to Lily May’s mom at the Shiloh Key auction that had been held out of town.

  “Ralph, our prepaid room was given to someone else,” Diesel said.

  “Oh shit,” Ralph said. “Timmy and I paid big bucks for two rooms, but we didn’t know one was yours and the goddess’s, Diesel. We’d never put a pregnant gal like the goddess out.”

  “What’s going on?”

  It was Lily May’s mom Gloria Redmond who’d spoken, as she entered the room dressed in knee-length shorts, a silky top, and sneakers.

  “The scumbag hotel owner sold our prepaid rooms to Ralph and Timmy,” Lily May said. “I’m now fixing to kill someone with my bare hands.”

  “No worries,” Ralph said. “You ladies take my room and I’ll bunk with Timmy.”

  “That’s very nice of you, Ralph,” Gloria said.

  “We’ll make sure to get your money back for you,” Diesel said, then gave the man at the desk a menacing look.

  Lily May grabbed the man by the collar again.

  “Of course they’ll get their money back,” the man said. “Can you please tell your wife to unhand me so I can see to that?”

  “It’s alright, Lily May,” Diesel said. “I’ve got my eye on him, so does Layton. He won’t get past us in one piece. Will he, Layton?”

  “No, he won’t,” I said.

  “Remember, the guy gave someone else our rooms too, Layton,” Sassy said.

  “Maybe we can bunk with Buck and Miss Lucy on your dad’s yacht,” Alex said to Sassy.

  “Oh shoot!” Sassy said. “What’s that group of crazies doing here?”

  “I’ll tell you later,” Layton said.

  “Don’t worry about a place to stay,” Charity said. “I have an idea about that.”

  “Layton, I’m gonna take some quick pics outside, if that’s all right,” Alex said.

  “That’s fine, but don’t stray too far,” I said.

  “I’ll stay close,” Alex said, then went outside.

  I watched him go out and someone entirely different walk in. A slim, older man of medium height with longish gray hair and a neatly kept, long, gray beard and mustache walked in smiling. He wore a sheer, short—above the knee, white, nineteen-twenties style dress over knee-high, green, rubber wading boots. The short sleeves of the dress showed off the man’s tan and in shape arms. Lace panels on the dress as well as a slip underneath kept the outfit from being too revealing.

  “Hi, Uncle Jorri,” Charity said, then gave the man a hug. “Everyone, this is my Uncle Jorri Parkinson.”

  Charity introduced her uncle to all of us. When I shook Jorri’s hand, I noticed he had military dog tags on a chain around his neck.

  “Were you in the military, Jorri?” I said.

  Before he could answer I heard Alex shouting and ran outside, followed by Diesel and Sassy.

  “My camera,” Alex said. “He got my camera!”

  Alex pointed out toward the crowd and I spotted the camera.

  “I’ll go after him from the left, Layton,” Diesel said.

  I took off, and made my way into the throng of people. The kid who had taken the camera looked back, saw me, and ran. But I was on his heels. He wove in and out between people and headed toward the buildings. I finally caught up with him as he was at the end of a narrow alley between the large hotel and the ice cream parlor. The skinny boy, who had straight, dark brown hair and couldn’t be more than nine or ten, looked at me.

  “All I want is the camera,” I said. “I won’t hurt you.”

  “I know you won’t,” the boy said and smiled. “Help, somebody help me! He’s trying to rape me! He’s grabbing my ass! Help!”

  “Shut up!” I said, and looked behind me.

  The bright sun was in my eyes out but I thought I spotted Sassy’s shadow. Since I figured I was being covered from behind I walked forward to get the camera. That was when something hard hit me on the back of the head and I blacked out.

  “LAYTON! LAYTON.”

  Someone was calling my name. Damn did my head hurt, but Alex was calling me. He needed me… I had to get up and help.

  “Don’t try to get up too quickly, soldier boy.”

  I opened my eyes and saw Sassy’s mom Gloria looking over me. Diesel and Sassy were at my side. Alex stood in front of me with a worried look on his face.

  “Sorry, Alex, I didn’t get your camera back,” I
said.

  “Don’t worry about that,” Alex said. “You have a big bump on the back of your head.”

  I touched the back of my head and felt the aforementioned bump. “Ouch. Sassy, Sassy was there. Did you get the camera, Sassy?”

  “Not yet,” Sassy said. “And it wasn’t me you saw. It was the young, punk thief’s gal pal and partner in crime. She’s about my size but not nearly as strong or smart. The girl hit you in the back of the head with her big yo-yo. She claims it was an accident but I’m not so sure.”

  Sassy looked to the side. I followed her gaze and saw a little, blonde girl sitting on a chair with her hands and legs tied up with masking tape. There was also a piece of tape over her mouth.

  “She didn’t think I’d kick her ass just because she’s a kid,” Sassy said. “Needless to say the future prison cell dweller was wrong. I’ve already put word on the street that we have the girl here, and will trade her for Alex’s camera.”

  “Thanks,” I said, then realized I was lying down on the sofa in the sitting area of the hotel. “How did I get here?”

  “I used the fireman’s lift to bring you back and off the field,” Diesel said. “You let your guard down back there, soldier.”

  “That’s because I thought Sassy was behind me, not some punk ass little girl,” I said. “The sun blinded me for a second, but you’re not telling a lie. I need to get my wits about me and quick before something else happens.”

  “Let’s just hope nothing else happens anytime soon,” Alex said.

  “Well I hope something does happen,” Sassy said. “I can’t wait till someone gets here to claim that little punk.” She pointed to the girl in the chair.

  “How long are you prepared to wait?” Gloria said.

  “Not long,” Sassy said, “then we hand her over to the cops.”

  “Jorri, do you recognize the girl,” I said. “Is she a local?”

  “She’s no local,” Jorri said. “A couple of weeks ago, she came here with the boy and his grandma. The grandma seems alright but the kids are wild, as you’ve come to discover.”

  “There’s wild and then there’s criminal,” Sassy said.

  “Surely the grandma will come when she hears the little girl is here,” Charity said.

  “One would hope,” Gloria said.

  “There’s always some shit going down, isn’t there?” Ralph said. “I’m gonna go clear my things out of the room, and move ‘em into Timmy’s quarters.” He went back up the stairs.

  “You all can’t be holding that little girl in here like that,” the man behind the desk said. “I don’t want any problems with the cops.”

  “If you don’t want problems with them, then keep your mouth shut,” I said.

  A long, narrow, sinister shadow appeared in the room, and a cold chill went up my back.

  “Granny is here,” the new arrival to the lobby said.

  Chapter 5

  Granny

  THE TALL, SLENDER woman entered with the boy who’d stolen the camera by her side. She wore a long-sleeved, black dress, the skirt of which dragged on the floor. Her white hair was pulled back from her face that was framed by a wide-brimmed straw hat. Black rimmed glasses kept us from seeing her eyes, which I had no doubt were staring us all down. I was surprised to notice her face was tan. A light tan, but I would’ve thought she’d be paler because of being so covered up.

  “As I said, my name is Granny,” the woman said from the center of the room. She glanced at the girl in the chair and huffed. “I should let you keep that one, but she’s the granddaughter of a very good friend of mine. Antoinette tends to lead my weak-willed grandson astray at times and into mischief making and committing naughty deeds.”

  “She can’t make me do squat!” the boy at Granny’s side said.

  “Shut your trap, Bogie,” Granny said, then addressed the room once more. “My grandson knew my birthday was coming up and thought the camera would make a nice gift. But he needs to learn not to take what belongs to others. Isn’t that so, Bogie?”

  Bogie folded his skinny, tan arms across his chest defiantly.

  “His daddy is Latin, and Bogie inherited his fiery temperament,” Granny said. “Bogart, hand the nice man back his camera and apologize.”

  “The name’s Bogie and you can kiss it, Grandma.”

  Everyone, including me, was taken back by the boy’s attitude. Granny responded by kicking Bogie so hard in the rear that he fell on the floor.

  “Did I hear you correctly when you said I should kick it—meaning kick your derriere because Granny may be old, but she has it in her to give you a few more kicks.”

  “That’s alright,” Bogie said. “One was enough.”

  “Are you sure, cause I got more?” Granny said. “Do you need more? You want more kicks so that you learn your lesson, little boy. I sure don’t see you rushing to give the man his camera back with an apology.”

  “I’m sorry, Sir,” Bogie said to Alex, then handed him his camera.

  “Thank you, Bogie,” Alex said.

  “You can take the girl back now,” Sassy said.

  “Let’s go,” Bogie said. “Let them keep Antoinette—she’s stupid.”

  Granny shot Bogie a look before walking to Antoinette and ripping the tape over her mouth off in one swift move. Antoinette let out a high pitched scream loud enough to wake the dead.

  “I can’t believe they were just gonna up and leave me here,” Antoinette said.

  Sassy used a pair of scissors to cut the tape away from Antoinette’s hands and legs while Granny pulled the tape off.

  “That was certainly my plan,” Bogie said.

  “May I suggest military school for the two of them?” Diesel said.

  “The military won’t take ‘em, they’re too wild,” Granny said.

  “My daddy was in the military—high up too,” Bogie said.

  “Quit your lyin’,” Antoinette said. “Your daddy got thrown out of the military, and is cleaning toilets now.”

  “Shut your mouth!” Bogie said.

  “Try and make me, you big bully!” Antoinette said.

  “What?” Bogie said. “You are crazy. I don’t need a stupid girl telling me what to do at nine-years-old.”

  The kid has a point, I thought, and was about to stand, but realized I was still unsteady on my feet so stayed sitting.

  “Whoa,” Alex said. “Now that’s enough… you kids shouldn’t be talking like that.”

  “Mortified,” Granny said as she took a long handkerchief out of her bag and wiped her nose then dabbed her eyes without removing her glasses. “I am absolutely mortified. You two have embarrassed me more than I can say. Making poor granny look like simple white trash in front of these nice strangers.” She started to cry and look around the room for sympathy, but got none. “There’s no sympathy for a poor, old, granny in this room. Let’s go, kids, we’ve outstayed our welcome.”

  “And it was an accident,” Antoinette said. “I didn’t mean to knock that man out. I’ve just started learning the diabolo—not yo-yo—from my friend Bebe and I accidentally let go of my wooden diabolo and the thing flew and hit the man in the head. There’s no way a poor, sweet, little girl like me could do such a thing on purpose.”

  “Antoinette, you’re so crazy they should lock you up in the monkey cages with the monkeys,” Bogie said.

  “Come along you two,” Granny said.

  Antoinette and Bogie followed Granny out the door. Bogie popped back in to stick out his tongue and blow us all a raspberry, before being yanked out by the back of his sleeveless T-shirt.

  “Was I hit hard enough on the head to have delusions?” I said.

  “I’m not sure even you could’ve dreamed up such crazy characters,” Alex said.

  “Three of many that are out on the key today, I’m sure,” Diesel said.

  During Granny’s visit, the desk clerk had put some cash in an envelope which he then handed Diesel so she could give it to Ralph. It was his money back
for the room.

  “We still need a place to stay,” Sassy said to me.

  “That’s not a problem,” Jorri said. “You can stay with us. We’ve got plenty of room, and we’re right on the beach.”

  “I was hoping you’d say that, Uncle Jorri,” Charity said.

  “Be sure to rest a while, Layton,” Gloria said. “Get up slowly. You’re lucky you don’t have a concussion.”

  “Thanks,” I said. “And I’ll follow your advice.”

  After saying our good-byes, Charity, Alex, Sassy, Jorri, and I went outside.

  “My golf cart is right around the corner,” Jorri said. “Can you make it there, Layton?”

  “Yeah,” I said. Alex put his arm around me and offered his support should I need it. “What I really need is some assurance that you all won’t let our kids get like Bogie and Antoinette.”

  Everyone laughed then Sassy spoke.

  “I’ll kick their butts if they get like those two.”

  “Charity, what did you think of Granny and her wards?” I said.

  “This may sound funny,” Charity said, “but, I almost felt like applauding when they left. As if I had been watching a performance—only it wasn’t a very good one.”

  “I get what you’re saying,” I said, while avoiding running into someone who had just stopped in front of me.

  “This crowd is something else,” Jorri said. “Even more folks than we get on festival days.”

  We were walking downhill now, and I found myself leaning on Alex a bit as my head was spinning slightly.

  “I sort of get what Charity’s talking about,” Sassy said. “Granny was more than a little over the top. And I’m not sure I believe she was crying behind those dark sunglasses. She never did take them off.”

  “We sure sound like a cynical bunch,” Alex said. ‘‘Maybe she’s exactly what she seems—an old granny trying to take care of some wild kids.”

  “Well,” I said, “may God have mercy on her then, cause she needs it, and some divine assistance with those two kids.”