Yours Truly
Page 2
Through all the shit I’d been through over the last two days, I still thought of her. How I hurt her and disappointed her.
How I should have abandoned this mission when I had the good sense to and left her alone.
It’s funny, she asked me to, but I didn’t. I couldn’t leave her alone.
On that first meeting last week, after years of not seeing each other, that was what she said to me. Leave me alone.
I should have.
I kept seeing the hurt on her face. I kept thinking of all the ways I could fix this situation, and each time I came up with something that might work it took seconds before I realized it wouldn’t.
In just a week and two days, all the things that happened were enough to fit in a lifetime.
Lost my girl, won her back, lost her again, framed for murder trying to steal the chip I came back to L.A. to protect, ended up in jail as prime suspect for said murder, disavowed by the government.
I was screwed.
Completely fucked over with no hope. And behold, the people I would have turned to had washed their hands of me.
Joe’s face when he came into the interrogation room the other night was unforgettable. Completely unforgettable. He looked worse than that time years ago. That last time when I went to prison.
Of course my colorful record didn’t help any.
It made me look like the troublemaker I was. History of theft. History of violence. History of being on the inside—behind bars.
I didn’t know what to do. I honestly didn’t know what the hell to do. I called the agency office in Washington and gave the distress codes only to be told those were non- existent.
I already knew the codes would be null before I attempted it, but I tried. Part of me wanted to still take a chance and see if they’d really abandoned me. They did. Just like that. And did they know the truth?
Who was Norton really working for?
It could be the government themselves and I would never know. I’d never know.
Here I was in jail for a crime I didn’t commit. Locked up with no hope of getting out because I had nothing.
The Bail hearing was yesterday and I was pleasantly informed that consideration of bail would not be granted because of the seriousness of the crime, and especially due to the fact that I’d been off grid. They wanted to keep me detained until the arraignment. It looked shady as shit, and they needed to know I wouldn’t flee the country or something. So that was it.
Murder.
Me. With nothing to save me I would be charged with murder. First degree.
I’d be sentenced for life.
Footsteps sounded down the corridor where the guards came from. The guy opposite my cell had been staring at the wall since I came back to my cell this morning. The guy next to him had no shame when he took a leak and thought everyone should see his disgustingly hairy ass too.
The sight churned my stomach.
I twisted around on my metal bench and faced the plain gray wall. Better to stare at the wall like the guy across from me. Better to get lost in that, in the gray hopelessness that engulfed the place.
The door unlocking made me look over my shoulder to see who was coming in. When I saw who it was, I twisted right around.
It was Joe. He still wore that look of displeasure and the type of disappointment only a father could have, but at least he was here.
The guard ushered him inside, locked the door and left us.
Joe pulled in a deep breath, ran a hand through his hair and lowered to sit on the metal chair in front of me.
“How you holding up, son?” he asked.
I looked away from him, feeling completely undeserving of him being in front of me, calling me son.
“I didn’t kill him, Joe.” That was the best thing I could think of saying. Nothing else mattered than him knowing that.
“Maybe that’s why I’m here. Maybe…it’s because I believe that. It’s the only reason, though. Sam, I’m gonna give you a chance here, with me. I’m throwing you a rope. If you don’t want it, tell me. I pushed with you when you were just a kid because you needed someone to care. You showed everyone that you didn’t need anybody when you left eight years ago. I can’t tell you how much that hurt, and damn it to hell, here I am again trying to stick my nose where it doesn’t belong.”
“I’m sorry.” I tensed and sat forward.
“You’re sorry? I don’t want to hear that. Sorry isn’t going to fix anything. You lied to us and I want to know why. So here’s the rope. If you don’t want to catch it, it’s cool. I’ll stay out of your way, and out of your life. But here’s the rope. If you catch it, you tell me every damn thing, and I want the truth.”
I had no hesitation in telling him anything, and there was no question in the fact of whether or not I was going to catch the rope. I was going to catch the damn rope and hold on tight. Because I needed him, needed him to believe me.
“I belong to a military agency who carry out secret missions.” It was so strange hearing myself say that because, of course, I’d never told anybody that. It wasn’t allowed. Penalty was death. But clearly I didn’t belong to the agency anymore. “As of two days ago, when I was arrested, I was disavowed. Completely abandoned. It sounds farfetched, but it’s the truth. I have no reason to lie to you. The worst thing has happened to me, and I lost Olivia.”
He tilted his head to the side. “Go on.”
I lowered my voice and continued, telling him everything about the chip, the crew, how I was set up. Everything.
Joe listened intently, not interrupting, just listening as I spoke.
When I was done he looked more haggard. “Sam, that’s deep shit. It’s deep, and what the hell are we supposed to do to prove all that?”
Although he sounded as hopeless as I felt, I was grateful he believed me.
“There’s nothing, that’s the problem. I can’t do anything, and I have no idea where Xavier would have gone.”
“Your friend, Patrick, would he have been in on it?”
I shrugged. “I don’t know, Joe. I have no idea. Honestly, it’s not the kind of thing I expected from any of them. We’d done so much good, and it’s clear if they killed Bradley they have no intention to do good.”
Patrick was what I called sheep. He just followed orders and didn’t think for himself. He did as he was told, whether it was wrong or not. Granted, we’d never came up against anything that was as wrong as what had happened now.
“What if we looked for him? It sounds like he wasn’t at the warehouse.”
“Someone hit me from behind. It could have been him, or it could have been Oz, or someone else.” I doubted it was someone else. I pictured it like this: the person who Xavier spoke to on the phone had to be Oz, and I think Patrick hit me with the bat.
That was how my mind played it all out. Like that. As for Norton, I didn’t know his whereabouts in the scenario. He was probably just giving orders. I told them exactly what they needed to know. When they saw the easiness of it they just did what they needed to themselves.
Without me. They took the chip and killed Bradley.
The cops were of course focused on Bradley’s death. It seemed like no one had questioned what had been missing from the case in the lab where Bradley stored the chip in because they found me and nothing I had on me looked like it belonged there.
The chip I’d labeled the hackers dream was gone. Xavier and the guys could be doing all sorts of shit with it and I was stuck here.
“Joe, I don’t know what to do. I honestly don’t know.”
“I wished you’d told me this before. I mean about the unit. As a cop I would have kept your secret. I get it,” Joe grimaced. “I get it that you couldn’t talk about what you were doing, but there was lies mixed up in it. You made us believe you were working for this investment company and you weren’t.”
“I know.” I held my head down, feeling worse than shit. When my gaze climbed up to meet his, I noticed his expression somewhat softened.
“I’m sorry, Joe. I just thought I was doing the right thing, following protocol, but I was going to… I was thinking of leaving the unit.”
How ironic that it was they who left me.
“How comes?” He looked like he already knew the answer to that question but wanted to hear me say it.
“Olivia.”
The guard returned and opened the cell door. “Bail’s been granted and paid,” he announced, giving me a crude stare.
“What?” I asked, looking from him to Joe. The bail was fifty grand.
“Thank you, I’ll take it from here.” Joe stood up.
It was him. He paid for bail and made all the arrangements.
The guard left us, leaving the cell door open.
“Joe, thank—”
“No, don’t say it. Don’t thank me. You’ve been released to my care until the trial, so don’t screw this up. We’ll investigate and see what intel we can gather. While we’re doing that, please stay the hell away from my daughter. She’s been through enough. You won’t hurt her again with any form of lies, doesn’t matter if they’re good or bad.”
He gave me a cold hard stare.
Years ago when Olivia and I hid our relationship from him we knew we didn’t need to. I didn’t think I’d be the kind of guy Joe would want his daughter to be with.
Now I knew it.
Chapter 3
Olivia
The aroma of coffee mingled with the freshly done cinnamon pretzels.
It tickled my nose like it always did when Jake did his first batch of pretzels for the morning.
On a different day, I would have absorbed the smell. I would have even felt tempted by it, tempted to grab a big sugary one and take it up to my office and feast on it before the seriousness of the day started.
Any day that wasn’t today, or the days that kicked off this week.
Jada looked me over. She was very careful with what she said since I told her about Sam.
She was being careful now with her silence. Silence as she sipped on a strong cup of black coffee with no sugar. Between the two of us we’d eaten enough sugar over the last few days to carry us throughout the rest of the year, and here I was thinking about pretzels.
At least my brain still worked.
I didn’t go into work on Monday. Yesterday I had a half-day. Today… I wasn’t sure if I should be here. There must have been some sort of legal rule somewhere that said depressed attorneys shouldn’t represent their clients in that sort of state. Things could go very wrong. The way I felt now, I’d have to reach into the depths of my mind to pull out the basic legal principles. I couldn’t focus on anything, and in my state I was a little better than a first-year law student who might have been able to recite a handful of constitutional rights.
That was it.
“Girl, this isn’t natural for me. This silence,” Jada huffed, flicking her hair over her shoulder. She’d taken out her braids over the weekend and wore her hair straight like mine with a center parting. As usual, the woman looked magazine-cover good while I looked like shit mixed with chopped liver.
“I don’t know what to do. Scrap that…” I held up a hand and dropped it back to my lap. “I do know. I want to go home and go back to my bed. That’s it.”
Her brows knit together and she set her mug down on the table.
“Sweetie, I’m not going to lie or convince you to do something I wouldn’t do. So I’m gonna say that if I were you, I’d be doing just that.”
I knew she would. Jada would retreat to her bed for less if she thought the thing she was stressing over would give her bags under her eyes. Me? No. I’d soldier through until the end, and then the angst of it all would end me.
“Marcus is going to have more questions.” He’d called me every day to check on me. I told him I wasn’t feeling well. Of course, Monday’s talk was about Bradley. He asked me if I’d heard what happened, and I felt like a fraud when I told him I’d just found out. At least I didn’t act like I was just hearing the news from him. That would have been worse, because I knew at some point I’d have to tell him the truth. I’d have to tell him that I knew Sam, and anyone who took one look at me would know there was more to the story than that.
“I think you should come clean with Marcus. Olivia, this isn’t about when you were dating or even you two as friends. If you don’t say something now, and later he finds out that you knew Sam, it’s going to look really bad.”
“I know.” I pulled in a deep breath. When I glanced at the door that just opened, I winced when I saw the Silvermans building.
I couldn’t do it today. In fact, I thought probably the best thing to do was call in sick this week.
Just this week. I needed time to process what had happened.
I needed time to get Sam out of my system.
I needed time to get Sam out of my heart. My damn heart that couldn’t let go.
A tear ran down my cheek and Jada reached out to take my hand.
“Sweetie, you shouldn’t have tried to come in today.”
“I know. I know. I’ll take the week off and just get my head together. Jada, I can’t shake him off. I can’t pull away from the feelings I had for him.”
“Had?” She gave me a small smile. “Don’t you mean have?”
I blinked several times to hold back the tears. I really didn’t want to cry in public. And not here. This little café was our happy place.
“We were supposed to be getting back together. I was thinking of what we’d do. It felt like it was real. Like it was supposed to be. We were supposed to find each other and get back together. I found him and I lost him all over again.”
Jada pressed her lips together. “Olivia, sometimes things may not be as they seem, and we have to dig a little deeper to find out what’s really going on.”
“There’s nothing to dig. It’s all there in the open for all to see. He lied. He came back here to steal Bradley’s research. He killed him.” Even as I said the words I didn’t believe them.
Sam killed Bradley.
“You really think he killed Bradley Henderson?” She toned her voice right down, cautious of the people around us. “Really, Olivia? I’ve barely seen him and even I don’t believe that. I don’t. You know why?”
“Why?” I was real interested to know.
“My gut instincts. That’s me for everything. Everything. I don’t care if it sounds weird or strange or whatever, it’s me. Sam didn’t kill that guy. He may have done some other shit, which I’m not happy with, but not that.”
My shoulders dropped. “What should I do? If you don’t believe he did it, then that means he’s innocent on some level.”
“Girl, you don’t want to know what I’d do.” She rolled her eyes and scrunched up her face.
“Yes, I totally do. I want to know.”
She snapped her fingers, showing off her perfectly done manicure. “It’s exactly as I said. I’d dig deeper. You love him. Don’t deny it. Please don’t. It’s me you’re talking to. I know you, and I know me. If my man was in trouble like this, even if he lied to me, I’d want to know the full story. I’d want to know everything so I could make an informed decision. You know how crazy nosy I am. I have to know everything. So that’s me. But, please honey, you don’t have to take my advice. Not one bit. The alternative, however, is looking like you.”
I hated when she was right. I really hated it.
“Jada, I feel like a fool.” I fought back tears.
“Maybe so, I would too, but put the pieces of the puzzle together. You were the wild card in this. He never expected to see you again. You guys just happened. Then, there’s what you told me, about him asking you to trust him. So there’s something he was going to tell you.”
I frowned. “Yeah. There was.”
“Don’t tell me you don’t want to know.”
“I do, I just don’t know if I should be fighting to stay on this path. It’s crazy, Jada.”
“It’s crazy, but it’s Sam.”
That was why it was so hard.
Whatever I felt blindsided me to the point where I cast aside my suspicions.
Sam, the business development manager. Really?
Sam working for Stephens Inc. Really?
And, going to work on a Sunday to sort some stuff out. I never even thought to question it.
The fact of the matter was simple: I moved too fast.
It was too fast and I’d made it easy.
So, sure, I wanted to know the full story. I just didn’t know if I should. Knowing more than the craziness I already knew would get me more involved. More involved with him.
“Olivia…look. I think you need to rest. You need to rest and relax for a bit. Maybe try not to think about what’s going on. Even for today. Just today. I know it sounds easier said than done, but lack of sleep can make things a hundred times worse.”
I could definitely agree with that. The pounding in my head signaling the start of a migraine would agree too. I reached for my purse. “I’m gonna go home. Home to my dad’s. I think I need to stay with him tonight.”
“Do whatever makes you feel better. I’m here for you. Please remember that. I hope I didn’t upset you.” Jada took me in with concern.
“No, you didn’t. I appreciate everything. You’re right. I should want to know the full story, but Sam has a habit of hurting me. It’s a continuous cycle of it. Jada…” My voice trailed off.
“Yeah.” The concern on her face deepened.
“What if…he’s not the Sam we knew? What if he changed and really did kill Bradley?” My heart squeezed at the thought.
“No…” She shook her head. “I don’t believe it.”
I looked at her and saw the inherent strength in her face. It gave me some hope. I may have been mad and in a state of flux and depression, but I didn’t want Sam to be guilty.