by Tiffany Sala
Mum and Daddy didn’t seem to be noticing anything out of the ordinary. Well, this was the game I’d started, wasn’t it: he was just kicking it up about a dozen notches right off the bat.
“Devin, let’s go get ourselves some food.” I managed to extricate myself from any contact with him without revealing anything else that should stay under wraps. I led the way over to the bench where a couple of varieties of bread and bowls of fruit and yoghurt were laid out, far too aware of his sleek suited self always hovering behind me. I made one resolution: I would always be properly attired around him in future.
“What are you doing?” I demanded once we were assembling plates for ourselves side by side and my parents were settling into an uneasy conversation of their own—a cover for something else that was passing between them silently, I was sure.
“No more than you were doing.” There was a strange sweetness in Devin’s smile. “I’m not like one of your usual little boys who is too afraid to even touch you. If you try to play games with me, I won’t allow you to assign me different rules.”
“You know what I think,” I muttered, “you have a problem with expressing intimacy with a woman unless there’s a point to it.”
“Spoken like a young woman who has never used intimacy without a purpose—and that being a purpose that pleases her and nobody else.”
“Who else am I supposed to be looking to please?” I demanded.
“If you intend to be intimate with me, you will need to be focused on pleasing me.”
“That sounds a little bit like your personal fantasy, Mr. O’Hare.”
Devin turned away from a very meticulously spread piece of toast on jam to frown at me. “No, Julia, I can’t say it’s ever been a fantasy of mine to have to put a young woman with a bad attitude back in her place. Some men may feel differently but you’ve chosen wrong in this case, if that was what you were hoping for.”
“It’s not like I chose you. This is basically a fix-up from my parents.”
Devin burst into unexpected and wholehearted laughter—the most dramatic reaction I’d gotten from him the whole time we’d been together, which probably wasn’t that surprising given the circumstances.
When he continued sniggering, provoking nervous coughs from my parents, my shoulders started to hunch. “Why is it so funny?”
“I’m just picturing all the other inadvisable fix-ups your parents could have gotten you into over the years with their history. It’s practically a pilot for a sitcom there. Maybe I should look some of those guys up, ask them if they’d like to take you on instead—”
I punched him in the arm. “Stop that!”
Then I wasn’t able to take back my hand.
With my wrist still secured, Devin uncurled my fingers. “This isn’t your high school playground, Julia.” His voice dropped after a glance behind. “This arrangement isn’t going to be of any use to either of us if you can’t keep yourself under control. I’m not interested in having to discipline you publicly, but you have to stay on my side or there’s nothing I can do.”
“Discipline?” I spoke too loudly, even though he’d been trying to speak quietly. It didn’t help that, even though I realised he was trying to be diplomatic in the presence of my parents, when he used his voice like that it just sounded sexy. It was messing with my common sense.
“I don’t mean it in some kinky whips-and-straps way, I mean in the sense that people who are capable of engaging with one another as adults will engage in various contracts, and when those are violated in a particularly shameful way, there needs to be some sort of punishment.”
That was when I realised, not for the first time this morning, that I was being an idiot. Time for resolution number two: I was not going to say or do anything to set Devin off until we had a contract drawn up and signed that marked out the parameters of our arrangement.
“You’re so obsessed with contracts,” I told him. “Where’s ours, anyway?” I was going to play it like this was something I’d already been thinking of, naturally.
“We can make a start on that today,” Devin said. “I’ll arrange for us to meet with my mother.”
“Your mother?” I almost shrieked. So much for keeping myself under control.
“She has a lot of contacts in the legal industry and she’s the only person who I trust to be absolutely on my side, so we need her involvement. Besides, I’m going to have to ask her if you can have the use of one of her properties until the wedding. I don’t think it’s a good idea to leave you here.”
A whole place to myself—just one of the ‘properties’ they had hanging around for spares, apparently. That should have been front-page news at any other time, but with this announcement of Mrs. O’Hare coming on the scene, it belonged somewhere around the sports section.
“You really think it’s a good idea to just… tell her everything?”
“She’s not going to lay off on her questions unless I do. She actually expects honesty.”
I didn’t think the mothers of any of the friends I’d tried to make ever really liked me. Mrs. O’Hare was not likely to be the exception.
“So.” Devin put his arm over my shoulders and started steering me back towards the table. I’d just been standing there staring down at my fruit and yoghurt like it didn’t belong to me. Which felt about accurate, since in Devin’s absence I would definitely have tucked into buttered toast with jam and some bacon and eggs. “After we conclude our delightful meeting here, you will be getting dressed and coming with me to our central house. You should start thinking about what you’d like to wear.”
“It’s black for funerals, isn’t it?” I thought from how he was looking now that our house was a slip on Devin’s part. He didn’t want me to know how tangled up with his mother his life was. Considering her house to be his house still in some way: pretty tangled. And the only reason to hide that from me was because there was trouble to be had there.
“Oh, my mother isn’t going to kill you,” Devin promised. “I learned everything I know from her. Her philosophy is to keep her enemies alive, so they can suffer for a more extended period of time.”
“I’ll wear black,” I said.
“What’s this about mothers?” asked Daddy, who could always spot an opportunity to shift the heat onto someone else.
“Looks like I’m going to be welcomed into the family,” I said, like I didn’t have a single concern about this.
Mum and Daddy exchanged glances, like they were looking forward to me coming crying back to them in twenty-four hours’ time begging them to fix this for me. I wasn’t sure why when it was pretty clear they didn’t have the faintest idea how to do that, but that was my parents for you… always a little bit more confident than they had any right to be.
Chapter Ten
“She’s going to judge you,” said Devin after we’d been driving for maybe ten minutes.
I had been occupying myself in trying to smooth down a crease in my black skirt that just kept on puckering up while I was sitting down; those words were exactly what it took to send me into an accelerated frenzy of smoothing.
“I’m telling you this because you need to hear it if you want to make this work,” Devin added. “I don’t think there’s anything wrong with you at all, quite the opposite. But she’s going to look at you right now and see a little girl on her way to a job interview.”
“Isn’t that what this is?” I retorted, mostly just to have something to say.
Devin snorted. “You’d better hope not. If she had a say you would already be out on your arse.”
I clenched my hands into fists so hard I started as my own nails started to pierce my skin.
“It’s really up to you.” Devin’s tone was conversational, his arms relaxed as he steered. “If you want to have this turn out the same as every other enterprise you’ve spearheaded: successful only by fluke, ultimately a failure… you can continue as you are. I won’t judge you, because that’s not what a potential husband is supposed
to be there for. But I’m telling you what you need to know to stand tall against those who will judge you and judge how to treat you based on their findings. I thought you might want to give that some attention.”
“You act like I’ve never been out in the wider world before.”
Devin’s faint smile bothered me more than if he hadn’t made any response. It was so clear he was trying to humour me for his own entertainment, and that was just humiliating.
“Yes, Julia, you’ve told me about your little parties with those other little boys and girls. But what do they really prove? You can hold your own against the other children, but you know for yourself that when the stakes grew higher, you were outclassed. You probably don’t need me to tell you that if you had never met that boy who stood up to you, the one you failed to contain, you would probably have stopped going to those parties all the same. He’s an excuse, a rather convenient one, but you’ve never had to use him on anyone but yourself, have you?”
I folded my arms, tucking those fists away. “I thought you wanted to marry me because you expected I’d make a good partner, not to break me down like this. Maybe I’m just one of the people you’re playing here.”
“Don’t be ridiculous,” said Devin, “you’re the one playing yourself. I’m trying to help you out.”
“Funny sort of help where you make me feel like an idiot for even trying.”
Devin pulled up hard alongside a block of apartments. I cringed against my side of the car, because clearly I’d gone too far without planning to, but he just slipped his key into his pocket and glanced behind before opening his door right into the oncoming traffic. There was a squeal as someone braked just fast enough to avoid plowing my present problem into oblivion.
When Devin opened the door on my side I said, “Why did you bother looking if you were just going to play chicken?”
He scowled at me. “Chicken? They had plenty of time to stop.”
“The rubber on the road suggests otherwise,” I muttered.
Devin kept staring at me as if I hadn’t said anything. “Come on, Julia, this is not a woman you want to keep waiting.”
That was when I realised we hadn’t stopped so Devin could chew me out, but… because this was where we were stopping. I hadn’t expected an apartment.
“This is where my mother has lived ever since the divorce,” Devin said, clearly far too good at reading me.
“You didn’t really mention that your parents had divorced yet.” The hint was there, but he’d made a point of avoiding any explicit mention until the absolute last minute.
“It isn’t an interesting topic of discussion,” said Devin, which was the proof to my point if there ever was any. “Try to restrain yourself from bringing it up to my mother, or that’s all we’ll talk about the whole time we’re here.”
“Well, and who would I be to deny my future mother-in-law if she wanted to—”
I had stepped out of the car and right into Devin’s hand over my mouth.
“Julia. Have better sense than to play around like this.”
I made a face through his hand, but when he let go of me to take my hand, I said no more. I found myself shrinking behind Devin’s bulk as we walked up to a surprisingly plain door in this grand building and Devin pressed an intercom button.
“Come in.” It was difficult to judge a voice only by how it sounded through a very cheap speaker, but I was already nervous just from what I heard of hers. My feelings were not eased any by the sight of the woman who opened the door we arrived at after a quick stride through a maze of corridors and stairs. She was also head-to-toe black down to the shiny stones of the necklace she wore, so at least I’d gotten the dress code right… the problem was, I was pretty sure now we were indeed dressing for my funeral.
She stared at me without flinching as I stepped into her apartment. Somehow I couldn’t even hide from her when I was physically using Devin as a buffer between the two of us.
Devin’s mother gestured us over to a tan leather couch that my job-interview skirt started slipping on as soon as I sat down. She stared for a long time at Devin holding my hand down against his leg before she turned her attention back to my face.
“Well, Devin made me aware that you would be coming, but I don’t have any idea what I am to call you.”
“Julia, uh…” I grimaced. “I’m sorry, I don’t have any idea what to call you, either.” I wasn’t going to take any risks guessing at that one.
“Angel would do just fine, Julia,” she returned. “Angel O’Hare.”
“Oh,” my mouth was moving before I could stop myself. “Devin kept your name when…”
Angel O’Hare raised a perfect eyebrow, her brilliant blue eyes almost seeming to pierce into me. “Devin is an O’Hare, not a Torro. That much is certain.”
“Remember that detail,” Devin muttered, “there’ll be a test later.”
“And since we’ve gotten that out of the way,” Angel continued, “you need to tell me why you’ve brought the Mahoney girl to my house.”
So much for Devin claiming that topic would occupy her for our entire meeting. Devin was shooting her a bemused look that quickly softened. “Of course you already know who she is.”
“You know what I’ve always said to you, Devin: it’s the people you don’t see who are destined to be the most trouble for you.”
“That sometimes comes true in the most interesting of ways,” Devin muttered. “Do you know why I’ve brought Julia here today?”
“I’ve left that as an exercise for you to surprise me with,” said Angel, which seemed like a really big-attitude way of admitting she had no way of figuring it out.
Devin squeezed my hand again. “Julia has agreed to become my wife… well, to begin the process of preparing to become my wife.”
“What!” Angel looked at me again with a kind of interest I didn’t think I liked. “Is this some goofball plan they’ve come up with to clear their debt?”
“It was my idea. I’m more than happy to forgive the debt for the privilege of humiliating them,” said Devin.
Angel crossed her ankles. “Well I don’t disagree in principle. She’s not much of a find though, is she?”
Devin’s grip on my hand was starting to hurt, and I wasn’t having any luck getting his attention to make him let go of me. “I see her having potential.”
“Ah yes, potential… the metric of underachievers.” Angel smirked at me like she’d been waiting to use that one on someone for a long time. “I’ve been looking forward to an opportunity arising to use that one.”
I wasn’t going to take that jab and just stay silent. “I’m so happy for you.”
I cringed into Devin’s side when Angel began looking me up and down in a new, much more appraising way, hating that it actually felt good to be close to him like that. I didn’t think he felt much of anything in return.
“I appreciate your spirit,” she said. “But that is only going to take you so far. You’re clearly defensive when it comes to your own flaws, but that in itself is a weakness in this world. Nobody else can make this situation easier for you, no matter what bull you feed them.”
She stood and walked away abruptly, leaving me blinking at the empty seat where she’d been. It was like she’d forgotten we were talking entirely… but then her voice floated back across the room. “What am I expected to contribute to this, Devin? I could offer you a jewel you can give her, something to set in a new band. We can call it a family heirloom.”
“There’s an interesting idea.” Devin turned to me. “Did you have a ring in mind already, or would you be happy to accept something from my mother?”
That wasn’t really a question, was it? “It’s fine with me.”
“Well then,” said Angel, “what sort of jewels do you like?”
My parents had given me tiny diamonds on significant dates, but I’d never spent any time thinking about what I did and didn’t like in jewels. They weren’t really my style in general. “Um�
�� what’s valuable?”
Devin’s expression darkened into an actual glare, but Angel seemed less offended. “Ha!” There was a squeak and a scrape from the sideboard she was fidgeting with. “I’m going to give you something good.” She walked back over with an almost invisible object cupped in her hands. When I peered more closely at her offering, I was startled by how much that tiny stone glittered. “You can select a band that suits your tastes and won’t embarrass us too much, and we’ll have it made up before the week is out.”
“Mother, we’re going to need some assistance on the legal side of this,” Devin put in. “I’ve agreed to give Julia an allowance of a certain amount in return for her participation in this project, and I think it’s important going forward that she has assurance that I will honour that deal.”
“Now,” said Angel, “and not once matters are a little more settled?” She turned to Devin while still holding that little diamond out to me. “Oh,” she said, though Devin hadn’t replied. “Yes, I understand now.”
“Well, thank you for not judging me too harshly,” said Devin in a tone that didn’t sound grateful at all.
“You’ve been an adult for a long time,” Angel replied, “and you don’t come to me to get permission to do something. You are responsible for both your decisions and the consequences of those decisions.” She set the diamond down on the coffee table in front of her seat like it was nothing, a toy. “What sort of arrangement are you coming to here?”
I squirmed as Devin named the figure he’d promised me and the conditions for earning it. Angel didn’t flicker an eyelid. “Is sex part of the deal?”
I forgot my own awkwardness as I was gifted, for the first time, with the sight of Devin profoundly uncomfortable. “It’s… not out of the question.”
“Right.” Angel produced a pair of glasses and slipped them on. “Well, I think we’ve got enough to go by now.”
“I don’t know why you were so worried about your mother,” I spoke up once we were on the road, with an electronic key to an apartment elsewhere in the city in our possession. An apartment of my own? Well, I probably wouldn’t be able to redecorate or anything, but if I wanted to watch TV all night, play my music loudly… walk around naked… well, it would be very different to being in my parents’ house, that was for sure. “She was surprisingly friendly. Especially given all that weird stuff we had to discuss with her.”