He chuckled. “I knew you could be loud.”
“You weren’t so quiet yourself, mister.”
His arms wrapped around me, holding me firmly against his chest. “Nope and I won’t be.”
He held me for a long time, both of us enjoying the moment. “What does all this mean?” I asked him, needing to know he was serious about everything.
“It means I’m never letting you go. Or my child. I’m here. I’m in it for the long haul.”
I lifted my head and looked into his eyes. “I don’t want to pressure you.”
“I’m not pressured. I want you. I want you and the baby and Jake.”
I smiled, dropping a kiss on his lips. “Only if you’re sure.”
“I’m ready for anything as long as I have you by my side. I can do this. I might struggle, but I’ll figure it out. If I screw up, I know I can count on you to set me straight.”
I softly giggled. “Damn straight I will.”
He was quiet for several minutes. I knew I had to leave soon but didn’t want to go. I liked being in bed with him. It was a new thing for us, but I liked it. A lot. I was already trying to work out the particulars in my head. He could stay with me a couple of nights a week, but I couldn’t really have a sleepover at his place.
“Willow?” he asked, sounding like he was in pain.
I popped my head up. “What is it?” I asked with concern, wondering if he’d changed his mind.
“I love you,” he said, his gaze holding mine.
Without warning, tears welled in my eyes. “I love you,” I whispered around the lump in my throat.
He leaned forward and kissed me, squeezing me even tighter against him. “This is strange for me,” he murmured.
“What part?”
“Love. I don’t know if I have ever felt this way about anything or anyone in my entire life. It’s strange and a little scary to be honest.”
“I’ve got you. You don’t have to be afraid.”
He sighed, relaxing under me. “Move in with me.”
“Ashton.”
“Please. You and Jake, move in here. I have so much space in this house. We need to get things ready for the baby. Move in and we can all get to know each other better. I want to try this family thing.”
“You can’t try the family thing. You do it.”
“Yes, that’s what I meant. I want to do it. I want to practice now and be really good at it by the time the baby arrives. I want this to work. Please?”
I blew out a breath. Logistically speaking, it did make sense. When the baby was born, he would obviously want to be around. My tiny apartment wasn’t exactly suitable for four people. “I’ll think about it. I need to talk to Jake.”
“Tell Jake I have a pool,” he said, grinning big.
“Oh, that’s cheating.”
He chuckled. “He told me he loves to swim. I have a pool and I’m not even sure how many bedrooms. There’s plenty of room. You can redecorate, do whatever. I want us to be a real family.”
My heart was filled with so much love for him in that moment. “I have to talk to Jake.”
“Fine. I will take that, but I don’t want to be apart from you. I hope you have a big bed, because my ass is going to be in it every night.”
I burst into laughter. “Well if that isn’t a motivating factor, I don’t know what is.”
Chapter 39
Ashton
I stopped at the little store on the corner that seemed to be the only place in the entire world that sold the particular juice Willow liked. I had learned the hard way that the juice was the only one that satisfied her cravings. When she asked for a particular brand and flavor, she wasn’t asking for whatever I could find. Or at least, that was along the general lines of the conversation we had when I had showed up at home with the wrong juice.
When I tried to order cases of the juice, I was lectured about trying to take the easy way out. The pregnancy had been mostly good but there had been moments I thought about locking her in a room and sliding food and water through a hole cut in the door. I loved her, but damn, she could be demanding.
I walked into the office that had been expanded to accommodate the program’s growing size. “Hello,” I greeted the young woman who was sitting behind a desk with a young boy.
“Willow is in the rec room,” she said.
“Thanks.”
I had become very familiar with the staff and most of the volunteers. I had been spending a lot of time at the center. I considered it hands-on training. I was trying to get as much experience being around kids as I could. All the kids that came to the center were older, but most of them had younger brothers and sisters. That was where I got my real practice.
I spotted Willow trying to pick up some foam balls but failing miserably. Her belly was quite large. Not that I would ever tell her that, but it was. I loved it. It made me love her even more. Her body was growing and stretching to accommodate my son.
My son.
I still couldn’t believe I was going to be a dad. It wasn’t until about three months ago, when she really started to show, that it all became very real. I realized I was going to be a dad.
I walked over to her, putting my hand on her back. “Hey,” I greeted.
“Hey there,” she said with an exhausted smile.
“I brought you some juice,” I said, handing her the bottle and bending over to pick up the balls for her.
“Thank you. This child has planted its foot in my ribcage and I am really not happy about it.”
“I’m sorry,” I said, putting my hands on her hips and looking into her tired eyes. “Did you tell him to move?”
“Your son is as stubborn as you are,” she retorted.
I laughed. “You can’t possibly know that.”
“Yes, I can.”
“Where’s Jake?” I asked, scanning the room.
“He’s in the art room with his friend from school. They got here about thirty minutes ago. Jake wanted to show him the new paints.”
“I’m glad he has a friend,” I said, dropping a kiss on her forehead.
“Me too,” she said with a smile. “He has completely changed this year, and I am going to say a lot of that is because of you.”
I couldn’t help but puff out my chest. “I appreciate you saying that, but I can’t take the credit for that. You are a good mom. A great mom. It’s the change in school that has made a huge difference.”
“Definitely,” she agreed.
“Are you almost finished for the day?” I asked. “I was thinking I could get your favorite Indian food delivered for dinner.”
“Yes, I’m ready to go home and get my feet out of these damn shoes.”
“I’ll give you a good foot rub,” I promised.
“I promised Jake he could go swimming for a bit,” she said.
“Works for me. You can rest while he and I get some laps in.”
“We need to finish the nursery,” she said, the exhaustion in her voice.
“I have guys coming in next week,” I told her. “I don’t want you doing any of the painting.”
She groaned. “I don’t need someone to do it.”
“I do,” I told her, knowing she was still struggling with the idea of being with a very wealthy man. I could take care of all her needs.
Getting her and Jake to move into my house had proven very difficult. She said the baby got his stubborn streak from me, but I begged to differ. She could give an elephant a run for its money.
She sighed. “This is where you’re going to tell me we don’t have to worry about money and I need to accept my new lifestyle.” She said it like a child that was repeating a lecture she had heard a hundred times.
I smiled and dropped another kiss on her nose. “Exactly. I’m going to check out what Jake is up to and then we can go home.”
“I’ll come with you. I’d like to tell him about the barbecue this weekend.”
I sighed. “Willow, you’re supposed to be ta
king it easy, not planning a barbecue.”
She looked up at me with that mischievous smile. “Too late. I’ve already invited Lilly and Kyle. I want Jake to have a friend there as well.”
I didn’t know why I tried. She was a machine. I had been telling her to slow down for weeks. She didn’t. She kept going. “I’ll order—”
“No.” She stopped me from finishing my sentence. “We’ll go to the grocery store like normal people and buy the steaks and burgers. I’ll make a couple of salads and Lilly will bring cookies.”
“Lilly always brings cookies,” I mumbled.
Willow burst into laughter. “Because that’s all she knows how to make.”
“Great.”
“Kyle said he would bring some chips and dip.”
It was strange to have people at my house, but it was another part of my new life with Willow. She had friends and insisted they come over. We had backyard barbecues and dinners and it felt like we celebrated every little thing. She found a lot of joy in life and it ended up being contagious. I had seen more of the city with her and Jake in the last few months than I had the entire time I had lived in San Francisco.
“Hi, Mom!” Jake hollered, waving at us as we came through the door. “Ashton, look what I painted!”
I walked to the easel that was set up next to his friend, Jason. “Wow!” I said with genuine surprise. “Is that Mario?”
“Yep.”
I chuckled, reaching over to ruffle his thick black hair. People often referred to him as my son. We did have the same hair color and I supposed it was an easy mistake to make. I never corrected them. Jake had become a huge part of my life and I did think of him as my son. One day, I wanted to be his father. I wasn’t pushing it. He would call me dad in his own time, if ever.
“That is awesome. What about you, Jason? What did you paint?”
The boy was shy. He and Jake had just naturally gravitated toward one another. We had learned that Jason’s mother passed away the year before, and it was just him and his dad, who happened to be a businessman on the go—a lot. Jason spent a lot of time with his grandmother, nanny, and now us. Willow had taken him under her wing. I wished like hell I would have had someone like her in my life when I was younger.
Jason showed me his painting of what I assumed was supposed to be Luigi. “Awesome, buddy. Awesome!”
“Can Jason come over tomorrow after school?” Jake asked, looking at me. “We want to play the new Mario game. His dad got it for his Switch too.”
“Absolutely, if your mom says it’s okay,” I said, turning to look at Willow.
“I don’t mind. We’ll order pizza.”
Jake grinned before looking at his buddy. “I told you my parents would say yes.”
Hearing him refer to me as his parent did something to me I couldn’t quite explain. I imagined it would be like winning a gold medal at the Olympics.
Willow nudged me. “Your parents are pretty cool,” she teased.
Jason’s nanny showed up to take him home.
“When my little brother is born, I’m going to teach him how to play the Switch too,” Jake said. “We need to get him one.”
“Jake, those are expensive toys,” Willow said. “We just don’t go out and buy them.”
“We’ll wait until he’s a little older and knows how to use his fingers and toes,” I said. “Then we will get him one.”
Willow groaned. “You are spoiling them and one of them doesn’t even draw breath yet.”
I grinned. “I cannot tell you how much pleasure it gives me to spoil them.”
“I’m going to grab my purse. You two try and stay out of trouble while I’m gone. Jake, clean up your station please.”
“I’ll help,” I offered.
She waddled out of the room, leaving me and Jake to put away the paints. “Are you excited about being a big brother soon?” I asked him.
“Yes! I can’t wait to hold him. Mom says I can feed him a bottle sometimes.”
I nodded. “You better believe it. We’re going to need all the help we can get.”
“My brother is going to call you dad, right?” he asked, his back to me.
“Yes,” I answered.
He didn’t say anything. His back was still to me. “Okay.”
“Jake,” I said, putting my hand on his shoulder. “What’s wrong?”
He turned to look at me. “Nothing.”
“Jake, what is it? You can tell me.”
He let out a long sigh. “My brother has a dad, but I don’t.”
“Jake, no. That is not the case at all.” I swallowed, not sure I had any business interfering in something so sensitive without Willow’s approval. I took another look at Jake and realized I had to call an audible. This was a moment that needed to be handled now. “I can be your dad if you want me to. You can call me dad, or you can call me Ashton. It’s up to you.”
He looked at me like he wasn’t sure I was being serious. “I can?”
“Absolutely. Definitely. I don’t want to pressure you, but I would be thrilled to be your dad.”
“You would?”
“Hell—” I stopped myself. “Heck yeah!”
His eyes lit up. “Okay. Dad.”
I laughed. “I like the way that sounds.”
“Can I tell Mom I can call you Dad?”
“Of course. I think it will make her happy.”
“What will make her happy?” Willow asked, coming into the room. “What’s going on in here? You guys were on cleanup duty.”
“Ashton is going to be my dad too,” Jake announced.
Willow clapped a hand over her mouth. Tears immediately flooded her eyes and spilled down her cheeks. It wasn’t really all that surprising. She often cried these days. “That’s great,” she squeaked.
I walked to her, wrapping my arms around her. “I hope I didn’t overstep,” I whispered close to her ear.
“No. I’m so in love with you.”
“Good, because I’m so in love with you.”
“Mom, Dad,” Jake said, obviously testing the word on his tongue. “Can we go home now?”
I found myself fighting back my own tears. “Yes. Let’s go. I’m starving and your mom needs to get off her feet.”
“I’ll make your tea, Mom,” Jake said with a great deal of pride.
“And then we’re going swimming,” I told him.
“Yep, Dad.”
I laughed. I had a feeling the word was going to be well used in the next few weeks. I didn’t mind. I had a family of my own. A real family. I was a dad, almost twice over.
Epilogue
Willow
First day home with the baby.
I took another picture. I was going to have to buy more storage space on my cloud. Our little boy, Cash, was absolutely perfect. He was too perfect for words. I didn’t know my heart could feel so full. Jake looked up at me, his smile just melting my heart. He held his baby brother in his arms, running one little finger over Cash’s perfect, baby-smooth skin.
“He’s so soft,” he whispered.
I took another picture. Literally at least two hundred pictures since Cash entered the world almost forty-eight hours earlier. I knew my picture taking was nothing compared to Ashton. I had not stopped seeing stars until just a little bit ago. He had taken pictures throughout the labor, but I threatened to chop off his man parts if there were any pictures of my lady parts. That was not a memory I wanted.
“Should I put him in bed?” Jake asked.
“I will do it this time because we have to be super careful with his head,” I told him.
He leaned down and gave his brother a kiss on the head. “Goodnight, little Cash. I’m your big brother. I’m going to see you in the morning.”
I leaned down and took the baby from Jake. Ashton came into the living room. The smile that had been on his face since I had told him I was in labor was still there. For a man who declared he didn’t want to be a father, he was certainly looking very fatherly.<
br />
“I’ll put Jake to bed while you get Cash settled in.”
“Thanks,” I whispered, cradling my baby against me.
I carried Cash to our bedroom where he would be sleeping for the first month or two. The house was huge, which was great, but I didn’t like being that far from the baby. Ashton agreed. I laid the baby in the little bassinet and stared down at the perfect seven-pound, eight-ounce baby boy with a head full of black hair. He had blue eyes now, but time would tell if they would stay that way.
I grabbed the baby monitor and moved down the hall to pop my head in on Jake and Ashton. I leaned against the wall, listening to the two of them talk. Jake was on Cloud Nine. I had been a little worried about sibling rivalry or Jake being jealous. Ashton and I talked a great deal about how important it was to make sure Jake didn’t feel jilted. I didn’t see or hear any signs of that yet, but we were all in the honeymoon phase. Two weeks into it, things might be a little different.
I heard Ashton give Jake a kiss on the head. He came out of the room and spotted me eavesdropping. “Going in?”
“Yes. Thank you.”
“I’ll be in the room.”
“I’m going to read with him for about fifteen minutes,” I told him.
“Take your time,” he said, a little glint in his eye.
I went into the room and found Jake in his favorite pajamas and tucked into bed. He had a book in his hand, clearly waiting for me. “Hey, bud, I hope you didn’t start the next chapter without me.”
He grinned. “Nope. I was waiting for you.”
I settled into his bed beside him, wrapping an arm around his shoulders. “It’s been a big day today.”
“I can’t wait to go to school and tell everyone my brother is here.”
“I guess that means you like him?” I teased.
He smiled. “I do. I hope he doesn’t cry a lot. My friend, Robby, told me his little sister cried for years.”
I laughed. “That’s a long time.”
Spring It On Me Page 24