Spooky Spice Cake Curse

by Addison Moore

  Mom snaps her fingers. “Then it’s settled. That’s what we’ll do.”

  “Great.” Carlotta pulls out her phone. “I’ll be your manager and take care of the details. Don’t you worry your pretty little Mirandy Lemonade head about it.”

  Mirandy Lemonade just so happens to be the nom de plume my mother uses when she pens those raunchy reads.

  Mom takes up my hand. “How are you feeling? You shouldn’t be on your feet so much.” She cranes her neck past me. “Lily, please make up a plate of spice cake for us all.”

  “I’m fine,” I assure her. “But I’m sure as heck not stopping Lily from delivering that spice cake.” I wink over at Lily. “I’m half-starved for it. Heck, I’m half-starved all the time no matter how many fried pickles or how much spice cake I eat.”

  “Speaking of eating.” Carlotta juts her head forward like a chicken. “Are you gonna eat the placenta? I hear it’s all the rage in the free-range mommy circles.”

  “I’m not eating my placenta, Carlotta. That’s disgusting.” I spit the words out as Lily hands me a plate of my super delicious spiced up confection and I pull out a bottle of hot sauce from under the counter and douse it.

  Mom shrugs. “Lainey has been making smoothies out of hers for the last few weeks now.”

  “What?” I squawk in horror. “I was just there last week and she offered me a smoothie. My God, I must have ingested it, too.” My hand glides to my throat. “If she wasn’t a mother, I’d kill my nutty granola sister.”

  “Don’t worry, Lot.” Carlotta pats me on the back. “I hear it increases your libido. You’ve got Mr. Sexy to keep up with now. You’re going to have to see about eating a placenta a week just to keep the fires alive in the bedroom.”

  Meg barks out a laugh. “Don’t worry, Lot. With two men still vying for your attention, you can pass on the first placenta. I’m sure there will be many more to follow.”

  Lily snorts. “Some people plant a tree with theirs. Lottie will be able to plant an entire forest.”

  I scoff at the two of them.

  Carlotta yucks it up. “That’s right, you can be a super-breeder, Lot. Try to have a bunch of babies at once, would ya? They pass out TV shows like Halloween candy to folks like that. I hear it’s a good paying gig. But if you do, I want me some airtime, too. And don’t worry, I’ll toss you onto my managerial roster. How do you like that? I’ve already got two clients.”

  “Yeah, Lottie.” Meg slings an arm around me. “Your show can be called My Two Husbands.”

  The four of them have a laugh attack over that one, too.

  “Well, I’m only married to Everett. So I don’t qualify for that show.” My hands warm my tiny pooch of a belly. Although, I might qualify for My Two Daddies. I bite down hard on my lip. Both Noah and Everett have vowed to love my baby no matter whose it turns out to be.

  That tall, dark, and handsome specter saunters out of the kitchen and heads over to Carlotta.

  Duke nudges at her. “Butt Nugget, I’m afraid I’m all out of confections. Could I trouble you to find me another one of those red tasty treats?”

  My jaw roots to the floor as I navigate Carlotta a few feet away. “Did he just call you Butt Nugget?” I whisper as loud as I can. “Whatever you’re doing to him, you stop it right now. He’s supposed to be helping us, not engaging in inappropriate love language with you of all people.”

  Carlotta covers his spiked ears with her hands. “Lily? Could you please put a red velvet cake in Lottie’s office for my sweet Mr. Fluffy Sunshine Pants?”

  My eyes widen with fright at the thought of her dragging Lily Swanson into this supernatural mess, let alone all the ears gathered around to witness Carlotta’s mental demise.

  Lily giggles. “Is this for your new imaginary boyfriend, Duke?”

  Carlotta nods before I have a chance to choke out a reply.

  “Sure thing.” Lily takes off and Duke trots off right after her.

  “Carlotta,” I hiss.

  Mom makes a face at me. “Oh, come on, Lottie. I think it’s perfectly fine that Carlotta has an imaginary boyfriend. If that’s what it takes to add a little spice in her relationship with Mayor Nash, then so be it.” She winks over at Carlotta. “Now let’s get moving and find a film crew who will spotlight my ghosts before I lose everything, including my shirt.”

  Carlotta whips off her sweater before I can stop her and about three customers run out the door screaming.

  Carlotta snorts my way. “Don’t judge me, Lottie. The hot flashes are real, and Miranda just brought to my attention an innovative way to cool off.” She navigates my mother to the nearest table, and Meg steps in front of me before I can attack Carlotta with my cardigan.

  “Just a heads-up, Lot, both Keelie and Lainey are due to go back to work tomorrow. The baby party is over, and it’s back to reality.”

  “What? So soon?” I press my hand to my chest, horrified that they’ll have to be separated from their little ones for so many hours of the day.

  “Yup. Keelie is counting down the hours, and Lainey is acting as if she were headed to the guillotine. But they’re both just coming back part-time. I’ll still manage the Honey Pot. Lainey is going to sob her way through the week at the library, but she can’t afford to be a stay-at-home mom right now. They’ve got that mortgage on the new house.”

  “Who’s watching the kids?”

  “Their mothers-in-law. I was thinking we should visit Lainey tomorrow at the library with a box of donuts.”

  Lainey is the head librarian at the Honey Hollow Public Library.

  “I agree. Donuts always make her feel better. Thanks for letting me know.”

  She takes off, and I press my lips together, hard.

  Who’s going to watch my baby when it’s time for me to come back from maternity leave? Noah’s mother is a pariah, and Everett’s mother farmed out her own children to boarding school as soon as they started drooling. It’s safe to say both of those women are off the list.

  Carlotta cackles at something my mother says and I shudder as I examine option A and option B. No offense, but they may as well be called Scary and Scarier.

  The bell chimes on the door and in walk Evie and Everett.

  “Oh, thank God.” I head over and wrap my arms around both of them at once.

  Evie has her hair up into a ponytail and her Honey Hollow High cheer uniform on. She’s entered the school as a junior this year, and so far things are going well—if you don’t count the fact just last month Carlotta incited her to start up an after-hours cheer team for hire to work parties. That—and the dead body at the back-to-school fundraiser last month. But it’s all been taken care of now, and school is going just fine. I hope.

  “Lemon.” Everett’s mouth twitches the hint of a smile as he lands his lips to mine. “How are you feeling?”

  “I’m feeling great,” I say, inhaling his spiced cologne with a greedy aggression. I can’t help it. Everett brings out the greedy aggression in me, in many different ways.

  Evie doesn’t look so convinced as she studies me. “I don’t know. Either you’ve been puking or you just found out about Carlotta’s imaginary boyfriend, Duke.”

  I gasp. “Carlotta,” I hiss over at her for dragging Evie into this.

  Evie nods. “It’s that one. Don’t worry, Mom. I’m cool with it. Hey? Can I visit the psych ward when they come to take her away?”

  “You do each time you come over,” I tell her. Carlotta has been living with me for months while Grandma Nell’s old house is being rebuilt from the studs up. Carlotta turned the living room into a swimming pool, then there was the black mold. She’s not exactly a four-leaf clover. But then, after all the bodies I’ve stumbled upon, neither am I.

  Evie breaks off a slice of spice cake from the plate Lily left on the counter.

  “Hey, Carlotta. Hey, Glam Glam.” Evie nods their way. And yes, Glam Glam would by my mother’s cutesy grandma-free moniker per her own request. “Guess what we were discussing i
n social studies today? That cursed Hearst family.”

  Carlotta zooms over. “The Hearst curse?”

  Mom zips over as well. “Please let everyone know your own family is cursed twice as hard and that we’ve got our very own haunted mansion they could visit for just eighty dollars a head. Oh, what the heck, I’ll throw in a student discount.”

  Carlotta smacks her. “You don’t have a student discount.”

  “I do now,” she shoots back, and they head off to pick up a few more sweet treats from Lily.

  “Dad, it was so cool,” Evie says, turning to Everett. “The teacher even brought up Mom and how she helped solve that case last month. She said Mom is basically a one-woman homicide investigation team.” Her lips knot up as she looks my way. “But then she brought up the point that you also seem to find all the bodies, so the class started calling you the killer baker.” She shrugs.

  Everett all but growls. “That’s terrible. I’m sorry you had to hear that. I’ll have a word with your teacher.”

  “Oh, I took care of it.” She nods. “I told them to just keep doing it and see if they lived until Christmas. I’ve got a killer mom and I’m not afraid to use her.”

  Great. Striking terror in the hearts of teens. Another life goal achieved.

  The door swings open, ushering in both an icy breeze and Noah. His tweed blazer is pulled tight, and his dark hair is slightly disheveled from the wind.

  “Uncle Noah! Wait until I tell you what we studied in class today.” Evie takes off in his direction.

  “While I have you alone”—Everett wraps his arms around me. His expression is stone cold, but that’s pretty much the norm for him—“I don’t think we should engage Evie in any of that Hearst curse stuff. She talked about it all the way home from school. She says she can’t wait to dive into this case with you.” His deep blue eyes sharpen over mine. “And we both know you’re not going anywhere near it.”

  My mouth falls open just as Noah comes over and offers me a quick embrace.

  “He’s right, Lot.” Noah shakes his head. “Let me handle this one. According to Evie, I’ve got my reputation on the line.”

  Carlotta and my mother trot back, and both Meg and Lily migrate in this direction too.

  Evie scoffs. “Oh, come on, Mom. You’re not about to let a couple of men tell you what you can and can’t do, are you? We’re totally investigating this case.”

  Duke strides out from the middle of the refrigerated shelves with a donut in his mouth and hands it to Carlotta.

  “Thanks, Snuggle Buns.” She leans his way. “Lot Lot is just about to openly defy the two civil servants she employs in her bedroom.”

  “Carlotta,” Mom grunts. “She doesn’t employ them. That makes it all sound so tawdry. This is a volunteer effort on the part of Noah and Everett.”

  Duke belts out a husky bark. “What’s this, Lottie? Don’t tell me I’m on my own with this case.”

  Carlotta gives him a scratch behind the ears. “I’ll never leave you, Hot Stuff.”

  Evie nods my way. “Me either, Mom. Don’t listen to these two buffoons.”

  “Evie.” I shake my head at her.

  “Evie.” Everett’s tone says everything. “Your uncle and I simply want what’s best for your mom and the baby.”

  Noah takes a breath. “That’s right. I’m here, and I’ll be working hard on the case. All you have to do, Lottie, is bake up a storm. I’ll take care of the rest.”

  “Mom”—Evie’s eyes bulge with what looks to be rage—“you’re not going to let them talk to you this way, are you? They want you barefoot and pregnant and in the kitchen. You’ll be setting women’s lib back a hundred years if you comply.”

  Shoot. Just when I was about to kick off my shoes and get comfortable while baking in the kitchen. I’m already knocked up. That would be three out of three and Evie might never forgive me.

  My mouth opens and closes as I look from Noah to Everett.

  “I”—my eyes drift to Evie’s—“am not going to work on the case.” Instantly, her shoulders sag and she’s crestfallen. “I’m simply going to help Evie do a little research on the family.” She perks right up again. “Nothing too in-depth, just a little scratching around the surface. I think it’s important to learn about some of the founding families of this town.”

  Evie gasps. “You mean the Hearst curse family basically started in Honey Hollow?”

  “That’s right,” I say. “But once they realized this place wasn’t going to be a cosmopolitan destination, they pretty much took off for fancier pastures. New York has been their home base for decades.”

  “Cool. I need to text my friends and let them know the killer baker is on the case and I get to help out.” She drifts off just as I try to protest.

  “Lemon,” Everett says it with a pang of grief in his voice.

  “Everett.” I plead with him with my eyes. “No sooner did I befriend that man than I found him headless. It was horrible. There is a brutal killer out there.”

  Noah sighs. “Exactly why you should stay away.”

  My eyes widen his way. “I thought we were working on cases together, remember? You said those words to me just a few months back.” Not to mention the tight constraints we agreed to just last month.

  “Before you were carrying my child.” The veins in Noah’s neck bulge, but his eyes have their own touch of grief embedded in them.

  “I don’t plan on endangering this child,” I say. “And personally, since we do have such a violent killer at large, I’m shocked the Ashford County Sheriff’s Department hasn’t hired me on as a consultant by now.” My voice hikes without my permission when I say it and the crowd in the bakery quiets down a notch.

  “A consultant?” Noah takes a deep breath. “Don’t work yourself up, Lottie.” He glances to his old stepbrother. “Everett? Can I have a quick word with you?”

  Noah pulls him over to the side, and soon the two of them seem to be scheming about something. More likely than not, they’re looking into creative ways to screw my shoes down to the bakery floor.

  A flood of customers moves in, and both Meg and Lily take over the register.

  Mom steps in close. “Don’t worry, Lottie. Let Noah have this one. You’re too busy with the bakery and getting ready for the baby to get involved with a murder investigation. Besides, I’ll need you to cater a few dessert platters for the cast and crew of Haunted House Hunters. They do live streaming, whatever that is, and they’ve got their own YouTube channel. Carlotta is working the B&B into their schedule. They’ve assured us that if we have real ghosts, they can get our name on the map. We just booked them a few minutes ago.”

  I shake my head at Carlotta. “I don’t like the sound of this.”

  “Now, now, no fretting.” Carlotta feeds Duke the rest of my spice cake. “I booked another film company as well. It doesn’t hurt to have a little competition. They’re called the Midnight Moaners. They’ve requested all-access use of the honeymoon suite. They said they’re really good at making the place sound haunted.”

  “Carlotta”—my voice spikes a notch—“are you even listening to yourself?”

  Duke heads back to the kitchen, and Mom takes off for Lainey’s house to visit with baby Josie.

  “What’s the matter, Lot? Afraid of a little competition in the moaning department? You can’t keep all the men and all the moaning to yourself. Besides, a few loud moans aren’t the only things I’ve got cooking up in my head.”

  I openly glare at Carlotta. “No. Whatever is turning and churning in that head of yours, the answer is no.”

  “Fine by me, but I was just going to tell you I’ll be your plus one on any ultra-covert ops you might be planning.”

  I shoot a quick glance to Noah and Everett, who are now pointing down at Noah’s phone then looking back my way, and I frown at the two of them.

  “Well, Carlotta, this might just be the first time I say yes to one of your ideas. Let’s hope I don’t regret it.”


  Grandma Nell’s warning comes back to me, and suddenly it feels as if I will.

  Chapter 5

  Everett and Evie convinced me to leave the bakery early, and both Lily and Meg said they’d close up the shop.

  Everett and I picked up Wicked Wok on the way home and Noah texted and asked if I wanted to split his pizza from Mangias, so, of course, I said yes. I might be sick to my stomach at the sight of chicken, the scent of boxes, the thought of anything that swims in the ocean, but for some reason, I’ve been able to maintain quite the healthy appetite.

  I also brought home a whole spice cake—complete with what Evie likes to call spider web frosting. It’s a layer of vanilla frosting with chocolate sauce artfully decorating the top in a webbed pattern. It was something I came up with, along with a litany of other pumpkin-spiced desserts to celebrate fall and the Halloween season.

  Once we hit my cozy rental house, Evie gets straight to pulling out the takeout and landing some plates on the table. Everett bought the house next door way back—when I moved into the neighborhood—while I was still dating Noah. And at the time I was more than pleased that Noah lives in the cabin across the street. Still am.

  Everett starts a fire while I feed my sweet cats, Pancake and Waffles, a pair of Himalayan brothers that were both gifted to me by my Grandma Nell. First, I had Pancake, and then when Nell died she left me Waffles. They’re nearly identical, with their creamy thick fur, rust-tipped tails, and light blue eyes. But they have distinct personalities. Pancake loves to cuddle, and Waffles likes to lick, which is a perfect combination if you ask me. Noah and Everett come to mind. They’re sort of the same way, but I’ll never make that comparison out loud.

  Everett comes over and wraps his arms around me.

  “Hello again, Judge Baxter.” I lift my brows at him.

  “Why do I get the feeling you’re not pleased with me?” A sly smile struggles to break free on his lips, because let’s face it, he’s getting a rise out of it.