He pummeled another nail into the wall of his home; a home that had been a gift. It was an unused property that gave him the seclusion and privacy he needed and desired. It was out of town and away from people. The owner had agreed to let him live in the home if he maintained the property. The old woman had no one to care for the house and acreage and he was willing to help her out with the repairs it needed. She didn’t realize that she was helping him get back on his feet after years of neglect to himself.
One more nail driven into the wall as images of where he once was came back to mind.
He left the hospital on a rainy day with a cane in his hand and a limp in his walk. He insisted that his lawyer bring him some clothes and all his money that was being held for him until he could get out. He wanted his Harley, but he had received a letter from her the day before he checked himself out that she sold it along with everything else. That Harley was his release. He could always clear his head when he was on his bike. Now he would have to leave this town.
When the lawyer came with what he asked for, he had walked out of the hospital and went straight to the bar. He had never been a drinker but he figured he had nothing to lose. Everything was gone now, so why not finish the job. After closing down the bar, he staggered right out of town. With his heavy camouflage coat, pockets full of his medications and cash, he was shaking this town off like the dirt he felt like. He didn’t care that his parents would be heartbroken and he sure didn’t care if she was hurting or not. She signed on the dotted line. He promised himself to push his family out of his mind and heart, and when he was drunk and had taken his pain medications, it wasn’t hard to do. When the medication was gone he didn’t get a refill.
He settled in the first city he came to and that’s where he stayed for the first year. It wasn’t hard to find a small apartment. He had nothing. He wanted nothing. He was content living on macaroni and cheese, eggs and cheap beer. Unfortunately, you cannot live on bread alone. He had to find a job. The one time he went out into the businesses with his resume, he frightened a poor woman conducting the interviews. He told himself he would never let that happen again. So he stayed inside all day and went out at night. He found a job working as the janitor at an office building. They didn’t care how he looked and he would be cleaning after hours. After his shift, he spent every night at the local bars. Drinking her away. Drinking them away. After almost a year of separation from his family, he was becoming desperate to forget them. He couldn’t hide from the images of his family back home. He knew in his heart that it was God telling him to go home, but his head told him not to. He kept telling himself he was too great a burden for Emma.
One day, he had a knock on his door. In yet another hung-over state, he answered. He was startled by who it was. He worried they had found him. It was Pastor Cross. He wondered if the man recognized him. The look on the man of God’s face told him otherwise. He hadn’t shaved since the day he walked out of the hospital and he didn’t remember showering in a couple days. He thought he even noticed a bit of the recoil that he had seen on every face he walked by. He didn’t invite the pastor in, but he was sure he had been rude to the man. Their words were few, but what Pastor Cross said to him that day stayed with him for the next few years.
“Son, I don’t know you from the next guy, but I can see you are in need. Just know, running from God and those who love you doesn’t get you very far. Here is my card and if you ever want to talk, feel free to come by the church, and we will talk.”
With a nod and a handshake, the man was gone and he decided to leave town the next day. He was not going to risk it anymore.
He drifted the country for six years. Until one night in Georgia, while he was walking home from a night at the bar, he saw a big white tent peeking over the tops of the trees. The closer he got to the tent, the louder the music became.
Singing, a piano, drums, a tambourine, a guitar, all playing together in a beautiful tune. One he had not heard in many years. He came closer yet and he heard a few shouts and whoops of joy and excitement. He had to see what was happening. It just seemed to draw him in. He felt like a thirsty camel in the middle of a desert. It was an oasis to him.
Standing just outside of the tent peering in, he realized it was a tent revival. He had an old familiar feeling start to take form in the pit of his stomach. He felt a need to respond to what he was seeing. He had been to many of these in his younger years. He had come to know Jesus Christ as his Lord and Savior at an old tent revival.
The loud and expressive minister reminded him of his pastor back home. A man he liked and admired. He stepped through the threshold of that tent, and walked right to the front and sat down in the chair the minister just got out of. He didn’t care what the congregation thought about his smell or appearance. He had an old need to hear what this man had to say. As the man preached, he knew that this night things were about to change. Sure enough, twenty minutes into the message, he found himself kneeling on the ground right in front of the man of God, seeking forgiveness from God. When all was said and done, he decided that he was done running.
He told the minister after the service, all that he had been running from and what happened. By the time he was finished, he was sobbing so hard that he could no longer talk. The minister wrapped an arm over his shoulders and said these words, “God is into giving second chances. You have walked away from Him and your family and you have seen how wrong it was. Now that you have chosen to let God have control again. It is time for you to go home.”
Through tear stained sobs, his response to the minister was, “What if she isn’t there?”
“Why don’t you let God make things happen in her and just do your part?” After a bit of a pause, he asked, “Do you need a ride son?” He had declined but still did as the minister had told him.
The night he reached his home town, a local police officer found him sitting by the side of the road. He was at war with himself. He wanted to go into town and find Pastor Cross but at the same time, he wanted to run the other way. He kept telling himself that God made him a new person and he didn’t need to run anymore.
Unfortunately, the officer thought he was drunk and because he didn’t respond to the questioning they took him downtown to the station. While emptying his pockets, one kind officer offered him the business card of his pastor, so he called the man and asked him to come down. Pastor Cross took him home, cleaned him up, counseled him, and made sure to find him jobs around the town. In one of their weekly meetings six months ago, he finally told the pastor who he really was. The man told him he already knew his identity and was excited to have him home again.
The ring of his cell phone echoed through the empty room. He had been mindlessly nailing away at the drywall and was surprised he hadn’t done more harm than good. The phone rang again and he reached into his pocket to retrieve it.
The name on the caller ID said Pastor, so he willingly answered.
“Hey there, Pastor. What can I do for ya?”
“You can meet me at Tony’s to celebrate.”
“Sure. Not sure what we are celebrating, but I could use some food. What time?”
“Meet me there at 5:30. This old man needs to be in bed by 8.”
They laughed in unison as he promised to meet his pastor and friend at the pizza joint.
Chapter 3
After a long first day at a new school, all Emma wanted to do was go home and take a long soak in her beautiful claw-foot tub. Instead, as she unlocked the door to their new house where she was met with stacks of boxes.
“Grandpa and Uncle Dan have been here!” exclaimed Stephen as he walked in behind her.
“I thought for sure we had less stuff than this,” chimed in Aaron.
“You think they put boxes in the right rooms?” asked Sarah.
“Honey, it looks like it was all just put in the living room and dining room. You have two strong brothers to help move things around,” replied Emma as she gave her sweet baby girl a side hug and sma
cked Stephen on the back.
She had accepted the teaching position at her old high school and signed on the house a week ago. It had been a crazy month. After four years of college and three years of teaching in some elementary school miles away in Toledo, she had finally found her way back home. Back to small town living and was blessed to find the position at her alma- mater available. She was not a big city girl by any means. The traffic and noise was enough to make this small town girl go nuts. And the men, well, just don’t even get her started on them. She had tried her hand at dating a couple of times, but it never felt right. She always walked in with a pit in her stomach the size of Texas. She walked out of the date singing the Hallelujah Chorus as she shook off yet another guy. That said something in her book. The last guy tried to be “dad” to the kids right off the bat and that didn’t sit well with any of them, so he was the last straw.
That was a year ago.
They had lived in an apartment all of the last four years and she was ready for wide open spaces and fresh air. She was a little uneasy about coming back home and seeing old friends and family. She couldn’t avoid it though. It was like God shut every door but this one. With all the applications and resumes she put out there, this was the only one that did not fall through. God was clearly telling her this is where she belonged. She was ready for the change. Ready to get back to her roots. Ready to come home.
Her hometown didn’t have anything exciting or unusual. No rolling hills or great fishing holes. No massive manufacturing plants that employ more than half the town. It just had a lot of farmland and a few curvy roads that were fun to drive on. It was basic but it was her hometown. The place where she and the kids were born. The place where she met Ryan. The place where her favorite church and pastor were. Her best and favorite memories were here. A lot had changed in the eight years since she had left here.
The town had added some new chain stores and restaurants. Downtown and Main Street had gotten a face lift. She also had no family support here. Her parents still lived on the other side of the state and Ryan’s parents moved out of the state two years after the accident. They held on as long as they could in hopes that Ryan would come around. They had heard that after he was done with therapy, treatments and couple of surgeries, he checked himself out of the hospital and disappeared. There were rumors that he had been seen around town in different bars but then the rumors stopped and nothing was heard of him again. He clearly had wanted nothing to do with anyone who knew him and loved him. So they moved on as well. She still kept in touch with her in-laws and made trips to visit them, but it wasn’t like it was before. The closeness wasn’t there as much, except with Tiffany. She had become a godsend even after they moved.
Whenever she could, Tiffany would make a trip to visit Emma and the kids for at least a day or two before she went to see her parents. Although she was much younger than Emma, they had become close friends. After about a year of her and Corp. Jones dating, he asked her to marry him. That was an odd moment for Emma. To stand next to Ryan’s sister as matron of honor as she married the man who had saved Ryan’s life. Emma thought he was a good guy and welcomed him openly, but it never felt right not having Ryan there. She knew Tiffany had been hurt by it.
The transition from Toledo to here was smooth. Emma felt blessed by all that God had worked out to get her here. She didn’t understand why He wanted her here, but she was not about to tell Him “No”. He had provided a home and a job and she gave Him a willing heart.
The house was on eight acres of land. The Peterson’s had given her a great deal. The old couple were ready to move closer to town and closer to their children and grandchildren. She really felt like she paid too little for the place. She had quite a savings set aside to be able to almost pay for the house in full, but they were insistent on the price. Mrs. Peterson even got on her about not “knocking a gift horse in the mouth” and that God wanted them to do this and they were good with that.
“What would we do with that much money anyway?” She knew they were just being overly nice. Old Mr. Peterson told her.
“Just take it honey. Your kids need these wide open spaces. To make you feel better, I insist that you allow me and my boys to continue to hunt and fish here, for life. But if at any point you want to sell the place, please let us know first. I would like to see it back in the family if at all possible.” She could agree with that, so she did as she was told. It truly was a beautiful place.
Six acres were wooded. Right now the property was in all its glory as the colors were beginning to change. It had been a cooler than normal summer, so it seemed like fall was coming early. Emma was excited to watch the change happen. In the middle of this wooded area was a large pond that was going to be great for some fishing and summer swimming. Mr. Peterson said it was fully stocked with all kinds of fish. There was a path that led from the back porch to the pond. Nothing major to take away from the ambiance of the property, but enough that you could easily find your way there and back. She felt such peace out here and the thought of having uncut woods behind and beside her brought out the excitement of her inner treasure hunter. The rest was lush, green yard space. Her boys were going to love her when it came time to mow this yard though. All they owned was a good old push mower. She would get a riding mower, eventually.
The house was a large, brick farmhouse with deep blue shutters that flanked each window and white trim. When she first saw the house, the color combination of red, white, and blue did not go unnoticed and it made her smile. The porch and a swing that graced the front of the house gave an inviting feeling to anyone who climbed the steps. She could imagine herself entertaining her friends, the few left in town, with good conversation and a good cup of coffee. This is what sold her on this house, that and the claw-foot tub she was still longing for at this moment.
When you walked through the front door, you found yourself in the living room. The hardwood floors and wood trim were bare and in good shape. They had that fresh look about them. She hoped that the Peterson’s had not refinished them just for her. To the left of the living room was another room that was used as an office. This made a great space for her to put a desk to do her school work. There was a doorway that flowed right into the kitchen. The kitchen was amazing. A large apron sink sat right beneath another large window that overlooked the backyard and into the woods. She also had a double oven, which Sarah loved because she was the resident baker. In the middle of the rather large kitchen was an island that held a cook-top. She would welcome the large cooking and prep space come the holidays. The downstairs bathroom and the laundry room were off the kitchen on one side. Through a large doorway that pointed you back in the direction of the front of the house was the dining area which then flowed right in to the living room again. The stairs to the second floor were between the living room and dining room. She could see Aaron and Sarah chasing each other through all the doorways around the stairs. It would be like a race track.
The kids’ bathroom was just off the kitchen. Upstairs had four bedrooms and a bathroom. The master bedroom and bathroom overlooked the backyard. The other rooms flanked the staircase on each side with an open space in the middle that had built-in bookshelf and a desk-like area which would work great for one of the kids to do their schoolwork. All throughout the house was the original trim and beautiful hardwood floors.
There was one space in the house though that Emma knew would become her personal sanctuary. The room was just off the back side of the kitchen. Through a heavy door that would shut out noise in the rest of the house, was a screened in porch. They called it a Michigan room. It was three walls covered in windows and it had an electric fireplace. Emma could see her chaise lounge and lamp by the windows and all her bookshelves would go on the wall that clearly at one time was the backside of the house. This would be her place of refuge from preteen boys and an increasingly emotional little girl. She loved her kids and couldn’t imagine her life without them, but every mother knows, she needed a place like th
is in her home. It would be her space. No Kids Allowed!
“Hey Ma! What are we going to have for dinner? There’s no food yet.” Leave it to Stephen to state the obvious.
“See the woods out back, get your gun and have at it Bud!” she jokingly replied.
“Yeah, okay mom, I am right on that.” Stephen said with all the attitude he had as he stomped up the stairs to check out his room.
“Hey! You could at least take a box up with you!” she yelled up the stairs after him. The response was a slammed door. She could tell that his tween and teen years could be the death of her.
“Boy, he sure is grumpy tonight,” commented Sarah.
“Yeah, he has been all day. I think he misses the old school.” Aaron said.
Stephen, who was now twelve and starting his seventh grade year, was always either really mellow or really moody. There wasn’t much of an in-between.
When Ryan disappeared, Stephen started to withdraw from people. He spent a lot of his time in his room or fighting with his brother. As he got older, he shut out the real world with video games. No matter how many times she tried, she couldn’t break the cycle. Emma hated that he was missing out on a childhood. He walked around with the weight of the world on his little shoulders. Well, now his big shoulders. He was growing into a handsome young man. If the youth pastor of their former church had not stepped in, she knew Stephen would be worse off than he is now. But you just can’t contend with hormones. Yes, she was very proud of her “Lil’’Man”. There were many times recently that Emma had to do a double take because his physical features were beginning to resemble Ryan.
Aaron, on the other hand, who was now ten, was the one child in the family who was going to do it his way, no matter what anyone said. He had been since the day he was born, but it intensified after the accident. It was like once he realized daddy was not coming home, he acted out constantly. She had read all the books she could find, talked to all the moms she had met, and even brought the pastor in for a “talking to” and it never changed. She figured she would do the best she could and follow God’s leading with this one. She prayed morning and night for him, for all three of her children, but she spent a couple extra minutes on him. He worried her sometimes. He was a very good looking kid, and he knew it. She knew he didn’t get the cockiness genetically from his dad, who was awkward and shy. Maybe it came from her side of the family. All the men are pretty confident in themselves. Emma, let out a little snicker at the thought.
What God Brings Together Page 3