The Hacker and his Heart's Desire

by James, Rebecca;

  Hung flopped back onto the sofa after retrieving his game, scowling at me but aiming his words at Blaze. “What’s goin’ on, Bossman?”

  “Cane’s got a guy lined up to work for Hard Time.”

  Something I’d been thinking about the night before popped into my mind, and I spoke up.

  “Blaze, I’ve been meaning to ask you if I could do a scene or two.” I refused to look Cane’s way. “Not like before. Um, something light.”

  Blaze looked surprised but didn’t question me. “Okay, sure. If that’s what you want.”

  I shrugged. “I could use the money.”

  “Web design not going well?” Blaze knew I’d quit my night job before I’d left town, and that I sent nearly everything I’d made on my last porn scene to my mother.

  “Just taking me a while to get back in the swing of things, that’s all. I spent a lot of money on my trip.” I hadn’t. I’d stayed in cheap motels and barely eaten.

  Blaze frowned. “I’d offer you a loan, but our money’s a little tied up right now after what we loaned to the Pistons.”

  After hearing the new leader of the Pistons was lacking some of the funds needed to rebuild their clubhouse after a fire, in the name of good club relations, the Hedonists had come to the decision to loan the money to them.

  “I don’t want you feeling like you have to go back to porn. I know you don’t like it very much.”

  “I don’t mind it,” I said, standing. “No big deal. Really. Let me know when you have something.” On the way to my room, Cane shifted on his feet as I walked by, causing our arms to brush. The way the touch of his bare skin affected me told me I had a long way to go before I’d be over him, no matter what I tried to tell myself.

  Fuck.

  ****

  Blaze arranged for me to do a solo jerk-off session, which was perfect.

  Lying on the bed on set, bright lights blocking out the faces I knew were just behind them, I concentrated on pleasuring myself while Kevin circled the bed with his camera. It was a challenge when doing porn to not climax too fast, but also not to turn the scene into a marathon that would have to be edited down, and I hated I had to imagine Cane’s big hand wrapped around my dick instead of my own in order to get anywhere. I wondered if he was standing behind those lights watching.

  Resting against a nest of white pillows, when I’d given enough footage of me stroking myself, I pictured Cane’s broad chest with the sprinkling of dark hair over muscular pecs, his washboard abs, and the delicious trail leading down to his long, thick cock and hefty balls that I vividly remembered slapping against my ass when he’d fucked me in the BDSM scene.

  I gasped, coming hard over my hand and stomach. Moaning, I slowed the tugs on my sensitive skin until the waves of pleasure ceased, at which point I finally let my cock droop against my hipbone and sighed.

  “And…cut!” Kevin called. God, I’d forgotten about the filming for a moment. “We’ll do a fade out there. Nice work, Tony. That was hot as hell.”

  At the sound of mumbled agreement behind the lights, I blushed and accepted a towel from Nick.

  “That really was hot,” he said to me as I mopped up my abs and stomach.

  “Thanks.” I was a little embarrassed. I’d been around Hard Time enough not to be bothered by watching the porn scenes, but it was different when I was acting in one, especially on my own.

  Nick handed me a robe, and I slipped it on as, one by one, the hot lights around me were extinguished.

  Nick leaned forward and whispered in my ear. “He was watching. Wouldn’t be surprised if he had a boner too.”

  I smiled and gently shoved Nick away, his words pleasing me far too much.

  “Got plans tonight?” Nick asked. “Royce has a friend who needs some work done on a website, and I thought maybe we could have dinner so you two can talk about it. If you’re interested.”

  I met Nick’s gaze as I pulled on my pants. “Really? That would be awesome.” Web design was what I enjoyed doing, but my long absence had cost me my client base, forcing me to effectively start over again.

  “Around seven? I’m going to go home and change, and then I could swing by and pick you up,” Nick said.

  “Sounds good.”

  Dinner kind of sounded like a double date, but I supposed that wouldn’t be the end of the world.

  ****

  Nick picked me up in his black Hyundai Santa Fe. In an attempt to appear professional, I’d worn a dark pair of slacks and a blue button-down shirt. I also wore my glasses, as my contacts had been bothering me for the past hour.

  Nick looked typically sassy in a blousy forest green shirt and black leggings. He greeted me as I slid into the passenger seat and set my messenger bag containing my laptop and charger at my feet. As I buckled up and Nick began backing the car out of the driveway, an unmistakable orange and black Harley pulled in beside us. Hung took off his helmet, and Nick hit the gas hard, forcing me to throw out my hand and brace myself on the dash as he lurched backward, shoved the car into drive, and took off down the dark street.

  “Whoa! Where’s the fire?” I asked, hand over my galloping heart.

  Looking flushed and more than a little flustered, Nick slowed the car down and glanced at me. “Sorry. He just pushes all my buttons.”

  “I can see that.”

  At Nick’s glare, I chuckled. “I get it. You know I do.” I sighed. “God, we’re a pair, aren’t we?”

  Nick took a deep breath and let it out. “I’ve got to get Jeovanni out of my head. I mean, Royce and I aren’t serious, but still. I’m with him, you know?”

  I nodded, although I didn’t understand why Nick stayed with someone he wasn’t completely happy with. I was looking forward to seeing him with Royce so I could get a better handle on their relationship.

  We were meeting Royce and his friend at an exclusive gay club in upper Manhattan called Lux. I was pretty sure it was the same place Isaac had worked for a while.

  “Royce is a member here?” I asked as Nick pulled into the dim underground parking garage.

  “Yeah. He and Dallas were meeting at the gym in the basement, so we thought it would be easiest to eat in the dining room.”

  “Dallas is the guy who wants to talk to me about making him a website?” I clarified.

  “Yeah. Dallas Spencer. He’s a jeweler.” Nick found a parking spot and pulled in.

  When we got out of the elevator on the top floor, I looked around. The halls were painted a rich gold color and dotted with expensive-looking paintings of scenes from various famous cities in Europe. Nick saw me looking at them and said, “You should see the ones upstairs. All male nudes doing very provocative things.” He winked at me.

  “Oh, yeah? What’s upstairs?” I asked.

  “That’s where people go to get to know one another better, if you know what I mean. There are some very interesting things up there, believe me.”

  I looked at him curiously. “You go up there often?”

  “No. But Royce has shown me.”

  We passed several groups of men on our way to the dining room, and a few gave me interested once-overs that made my skin tingle with awareness. I’d been told all my life I was a good-looking man, but I really didn’t think there was anything special about me. If you’d seen one lean blond, you’d seen them all. Although flattering, attention and admiration made me a little uncomfortable, but I made an effort to meet each man’s gaze and not cast my eyes to the floor and hurry my steps like I wanted to.

  We entered the dining room and were immediately led to a table in the corner where two casually dressed men sat. Both had damp hair as though they’d just showered. One, a powerfully built man with dark hair and a goatee, stood at our approach and smiled at Nick fondly before shaking my hand.

  “You must be Tony,” he said, dark eyes warm.

  “And you must be Royce,” I returned. “Good to meet you.”

  “This is my good friend, Dallas Spencer. Dallas, Tony Sarto.” Royce’s br
oad-shouldered companion stood, obvious pleasure warming his blue-green eyes.

  “Sarto. Italian?” he asked.

  I nodded as I shook his hand. “My father was Italian, but my mother is Swedish.”

  “That explains your unusual looks,” Dallas said. “I hope I’m not too forward in saying you are an exceptionally attractive man with that blond hair and olive skin. Not to mention the blue eyes.” I felt myself blushing, and Dallas continued, “I’ve been looking forward to meeting you. Nick here says you’re very talented.”

  I glanced at Nick, who gave me a look that plainly said, Well, you are.

  “I hope I can live up to Nick’s confidence in me,” I said, and Nick rolled his eyes.

  “He will, don’t worry. He’s just infuriatingly modest.”

  We sat, and a waiter approached our table with menus.

  “Do you live in the city?” Dallas asked me after we’d all ordered drinks and the waiter had left.

  “Clinton Hill,” I said, watching for a reaction to the area, which wasn’t exactly impressive. I didn’t get one. Ten points for him.

  “Lots of diversity there,” Dallas said, smiling.

  “Yes,” I agreed.

  “Did you have a nice workout, Daddy?” Nick asked Royce. Dallas didn’t seem fazed at the moniker. I, on the other hand, was a little uncomfortable. It would take some getting used to.

  “A hard one, Nicky. I have to keep myself in shape so I can keep up with you.” Royce tugged gently at Nick’s earlobe.

  The server returned with our drinks, and the four of us fell into easy conversation. While we talked, I observed Royce and Nick. Royce brought to my mind the term gentle giant. He smiled indulgently at Nick when the younger man spoke, but the longer I watched them, the more I felt like Nick was bored. I could imagine him pushing at some kind of invisible boundary, trying to get a rise out of Royce but failing with the patient man.

  The chicken cordon bleu I’d ordered was delicious. Dallas offered me a portion of his porterhouse steak, but I politely declined, not particularly fond of red meat, although I ate it sometimes. Nick seemed out of sorts the more the night wore on and poked dejectedly at his chef salad as Royce, seemingly oblivious to his boy’s mood, ate his shrimp and pasta dish with gusto as he spoke about his last trip overseas.

  Our meals finished, the server approached with the dessert menu. I was far too full but encouraged the others to order.

  “I’m just going to find the restroom.” I stood and headed for the hallway.

  CHAPTER NINE

  Cane

  Watching Tony get himself off in that porn scene had been pure torture. I hadn’t planned to be there, but as the time drew near, I’d been drawn in like a lion to fresh meat, eyes seeking out Tony’s golden body on the bed, his hand working a cock just as long and pretty as I’d remembered it.

  God, I was so fucked. Hung up on a guy I couldn’t have and completely unable to keep my distance. How I’d managed to lie straight to his face the night he’d come to my room and crawled into my bed with me, I had no idea. I’d been lost in his kisses and the way our eyes had locked when he’d mounted and ridden me slowly. It had been the sexiest fucking thing I’d ever experienced and something I couldn’t forget. And I’d tried. I was sure Tony had felt it, too, which had to have made my rejection afterward even worse.

  As though my renewed thoughts of him had conjured the man himself, I jolted when I spotted Tony across the dining room of Lux, the private club Karl had summoned me to. Tony was sitting with Nick, Hard Time’s incorrigibly flirtatious assistant, and two other men I’d never seen before. The way Nick was plastered against one of them, I assumed they were together. Did that mean the other guy was Tony’s date? Jealousy coursed through me at the thought, and I made a noise that drew Karl’s attention away from his food.

  “What? The food not good?”

  “A little rarer than I like it,” I said, referring to my steak.

  “Should have ordered it well done. They aren’t mind readers.” Karl continued eating. I tried to keep my eyes away from Tony’s table, but later, when I saw him get up and leave the dining room, I made an excuse to Karl and followed him.

  When I entered the rest room, Tony was washing his hands. Our gazes met in the mirror, and he froze, eyes a deep blue behind dark framed glasses.

  “What are you doing here?” he asked.

  “Dinner with my cousin,” I said without thinking. I shouldn’t have told him Karl was my cousin. What the hell was wrong with me? I needed to turn around and leave.

  “You on a date?” I asked instead.

  A shadow passed through Tony’s eyes before he picked up one of the fancy disposable towels and wiped his hands.

  “Business dinner,” he said.

  I sighed, suddenly so fucking tired of the tension between us and Tony’s resentment of me, as well as the goddamn attraction to him I couldn’t shake. “I never wanted a war between us. I hate the way you avoid me. I feel like I’ve messed things up in the club.”

  A myriad of expressions passed over Tony’s face in a matter of seconds. He tossed the towel in the trash and leaned against the counter, facing me. “I’m sorry. I’ve been making everything more difficult with my attitude. Since I’ve been back, I’ve noticed you’ve been making a real attempt with the club, and I’m glad. I’ve been acting like a child, sulking over not getting what I wanted. I’ll do better.”

  He smiled at me, and I was so annoyed by…something, I didn’t stop him from walking past me and out the door.

  I looked at myself in the mirror, noting my rigid stance and set jaw. Shouldn’t I be happy about what Tony had said? Wasn’t it what I’d wanted?

  No, it wasn’t. But what I wanted, I couldn’t have.

  I waited a few moments before returning to the dining room where Karl sat, annoyed at my absence.

  “How long does it take, man? We have things to discuss.” He launched into more business talk, and I drained my bourbon as I listened.

  A short time later, I detected a presence beside me. When I looked up to see Tony standing by our table, I nearly choked on my drink.

  “Sorry to interrupt.” Tony smiled graciously at us in the charming way he hadn’t directed toward me in so long. I sat stunned, watching him. He glanced at the rest of his party waiting by the door and continued, focusing on Karl. “I just wanted to stop and introduce myself.” He held out his right hand. “I’m Tony Sarto.”

  When Karl just stared at him, Tony glanced at me and added, “A friend of Cane’s.”

  Obviously taken off guard, Karl shook Tony’s hand, giving him an appraising once-over.

  “Karl Bruder. Very nice to meet you. I wasn’t aware Cane had friends who belonged to Lux.” He sent me a dark look before indicating the messenger bag on Tony’s shoulder and asking him, “Having a working dinner?”

  Tony smiled pleasantly. “Of sorts. I’m designing a website for one of them. And I don’t belong to Lux; my friend’s boyfriend does.” He indicated the group waiting for him by the door.

  Karl glanced at me again. “Is that a fact? What a coincidence. I find myself in need of that very service. Do you have a card?”

  I inwardly cursed as Tony fished one out of his wallet and handed it to Karl.

  “See you later” Tony said to me. “It was nice meeting you,” he said to Karl and left.

  “How convenient,” Karl said, looking at Tony’s business card before pocketing it. He leaned forward, staring me in the eyes. “I thought you said you didn’t know of anyone who worked on websites.”

  “I said I didn’t know of anyone to work on yours. I’ve told you I like to keep my business and private lives separate,” I said.

  “And I told you I expect more loyalty from you.” He sat back and finished off his drink, and my heart fell as I felt whatever trust I’d been able to build with my cousin ebbing away.

  CHAPTER TEN

  Tony

  After spending several hours at Royce’s beautif
ul apartment in Midtown West going over plans for Dallas’s website, Nick drove me home.

  “Are you sure you don’t want to stay at Royce’s?” I asked as we buckled up. “I meant it when I said I wouldn’t mind calling an Uber.”

  “I’m sure.”

  I didn’t say anything, having noticed Nick had seemed subdued most of the evening.

  “He likes you,” Nick said.

  “Who, Royce?”

  “Well, yeah, but I meant Dallas.” He glanced over at me as he pulled out of the parking space. “He’s goodlooking, don’t you think?”

  “Sure.” I shrugged.

  “But?”

  “But I’m not interested in the whole Daddy/boy thing.”

  Nick laughed. “Why do you assume he’s into that?”

  I floundered, unsure. “He’s not?”

  Nick shrugged. “Not that I know of.”

  “Oh.”

  “So, if he’s not, would you consider going out with him?”

  I thought of Cane, and that made me angry with myself. Why the fuck did I have to remain so stuck on him even when I knew he didn’t want me?

  “Maybe,” I said.

  The answer seemed to satisfy Nick. We sat in silence a while, and I began mentally running through things I’d do with Dallas’s website.

  “Do you mind if I sleep in your bed with you tonight?” Nick suddenly asked. “If the couch is taken, that is. I’m too tired to go home, and I have to be at Hard Time early in the morning.”

  “No, I don’t mind.”

  When we got to the clubhouse, Skitz was asleep on the couch, but as it turned out, Hung wasn’t home.

  “If he’s not here by now, he won’t be home tonight. You can have his bed.”

  “No, thanks. If he did happen to come home and saw me there, I’d never hear the end of it. I made the mistake of flirting with him before I really got to know him, and I’m sure it went to his head. He’ll think I want to be close to him.”

  I chuckled. “Okay, then I can take his bed and you can take mine, or we can both sleep in his together.”