Home on the Ranch--Tennessee Homecoming

by April Arrington

  If I’m wrong, one day you’ll read this and I won’t be with you. If this is the case, I’m sorry, Katie. Sorrier than I could ever say.

  The words blurred. Katie blinked hard and hot tears rolled down her cheeks.

  I don’t know why things turn out the way they do sometimes and I have no idea how old my children will be or what they’ll be facing. What I do know is that I want them to be raised by the person I admire most in the world. You.

  Katie jerked her head up, stared at the empty stretch of road the limo had just traveled, then spun around and looked at the caskets. The breeze picked up, scattering red petals across the dark wood.

  So here it is: Matthew can be prideful and stubborn. He’ll need your heart. Emma tends to be timid and too trusting. She’ll need your strength and discerning eye. And if Frank and I are lucky, you’ll have one more niece or nephew to get to know.

  Frank has chosen Landon as secondary guardian, which means you’ll have a partner in this, and he’ll be an excellent help if you need it. He’s a wonderful man and loves our kids as much as if they were his own. Please give him as much time with the kids as you can. And spend time with him, too. I think you’ll grow to trust and respect him as much as Frank and I do. Landon will step in if...for whatever reason, you’re unable to follow through. But I hope that’s not the case.

  Will you do it? For me? Because you love me? And because I’ve never loved another soul walking this earth more than I’ve loved you? I understand if you can’t, but I hope you will. Because no matter how sad or afraid you might be, I promise you things will work out. My kids will love you as much I do and you’ll love them, too. You’ll help them laugh again, Katie. And you’ll teach them how to live life to the fullest. I know you will. So, please do it for me.

  And if you’re second-guessing yourself, well...buck up, Katydid. Because there’s nothing you can’t handle.

  Chapter 2

  Landon believed a peaceful evening in east Tennessee could heal any wound afflicting a damaged soul. Tonight, however, proved there might be one he’d underestimated.

  Using the edge of a side table, he cracked the cap off a cold beer, took a big swig then eased back in a rocking chair. He gazed into the distance, rocking slowly on the front porch of his home, and tried to find solace in familiar surroundings.

  The moon, bright and full, nestled between two mountain peaks on the horizon, easing higher into the starlit sky and casting a white glow over the fifty-three acres of his small ranch. Rhythmic hoots of a barred owl, the rustle of small critters scampering in nearby woods and a snazzy chorus of katydids were tonight’s song.

  A low sound escaped Landon’s lips—half laugh, half harrumph. “Katydid.”

  Rascal, a middle-aged German shepherd, rose from his relaxed pose on the porch floor and perked his ears. He stuck one large paw out, settling it beside the toe of Landon’s boot.

  “Sorry, bud.” Landon forced a smile and patted his thick fur. “Go back to sleep.”

  He lowered back to his belly, nuzzled his black nose against Landon’s leg and closed his eyes.

  Landon took a heftier swig of his beer then rolled the fizzy beverage over his tongue. Jennifer’s nickname for Katie had taken hold when they were kids and she’d often used it to give Katie an extra push whenever she’d been scared or nervous.

  Katydids can thrive anywhere, she’d once told Katie.

  Several years ago, he’d accompanied Jennifer and Frank, who’d recently married, to Elk Valley’s spring festival to cheer Katie on in the talent show. She’d been eighteen, terrified and refused to step onto the stage into the spotlight. A little prodding from Jennifer, though, and Katie had stridden out there and belted out a lonely tune sweet enough to moisten most eyes in hearing range, including his own.

  She’d won a trophy and, if he were a betting man, he’d wager she’d won a whole lot of hearts, too. The question now was, after receiving word of Jennifer’s wishes, would Katie try to win her sister’s children, too?

  No telling what was in that letter or where Katie was at the moment. He’d waited at Patricia’s house for hours, comforting the kids and hoping Katie would return, express her astonishment at the discovery and immediately ask to relinquish her rights. Only, she hadn’t shown. So he’d given up, kissed the kids good-night then left them with Patricia, at her request, for the evening.

  For all he knew, instead of being tempted to give in to Jennifer’s wishes, Katie may have done exactly as Patricia had predicted and hauled ass the moment she finished reading the letter. Which wouldn’t bode well for the kids having any decent kind of relationship with her.

  Or she could be in Cecil’s office right now, demanding every detail of primary guardianship, then assume the role while he sat here and chugged beer.

  Quite frankly, he didn’t know which scenario was worse.

  He closed his eyes and rolled his head against the chair’s headrest. The heavy weight of grief lodged in his throat and pressed hard on his ribs. Man, he didn’t want to think about it. Fact was, he didn’t want to think about anything beyond keeping the pain at bay and helping the kids pack their belongings tomorrow morning.

  Moving them into his home and getting them settled on the ranch was priority one. To the point that he’d have to grieve for Frank and Jennifer later. Much later. After he helped the kids through their own period of mourning.

  Emma hadn’t worried him as much. She’d fought with a brave face throughout the service like a trouper. And Sophia was too young to fully conceive of the loss as of yet. Matthew, on the other hand—

  The owl screeched in the distance, a furious flap of wings followed, then the growl of an engine flooded the valley, echoing off the surrounding mountain range. A car roared down the curvy driveway then jerked to a halt amid a thick cloud of dust.

  Rascal sprang up, barking.

  “Ah, hell.” Landon jumped to his feet and grabbed his collar gently. “Easy, Rascal.”

  The driver’s-side door slammed and Katie’s slim figure worked its way quickly up the graveled walkway in the dark.

  “Is this what you wanted to talk to me about before I left?” Paper crinkled and a shapely arm waved something white that caught the moonlight. “What was it you called them? Loose ends?”

  “Nice to see you again, Katie,” he called out. “Wished you woulda called first and let me know you were coming.”

  She stopped, her high heels thudding on the bottom porch step, and looked up at him. The moonlight bathed the curve of her flushed cheek and her chin trembled.

  “I’m sorry,” she whispered. “I didn’t mean to intrude or be so crass.” She shoved her long hair over her shoulders and moved closer, bringing her hurt-filled eyes into view. “I just can’t believe this—any of it. I spoke to Cecil. He took me to his office and I read the will. He said you knew, that my mom knew, too. And neither one of you bothered to tell me.”

  His face heated. “I didn’t know how to tell you. I’ve never dealt with anything like this before and I was waiting for the right time.”

  “When?” A pained look crossed her face. “After I left again? Because that’s what both of you thought I’d do, right? Just dump the kids on you and walk away as though Matthew, Emma and Sophia are just—” she shook her head “—loose ends?”

  Landon set down his beer then shifted from one foot to the other. Her words hit closer to the truth than he wanted to admit.

  “Do the kids know?” she asked.

  “No. I thought it’d be best if we discussed things first.” He nudged Rascal to the side, commanded him to stay put then opened the front door. “Please come in. I’ll get you a drink then we’ll sit down and talk.”

  She hovered, those beautiful eyes of hers moving from him to Rascal then back. She sighed then ascended the steps, a barely audible “thank you” preceding her.

  Landon led the wa
y through the small living room to the even smaller kitchen then waited on the threshold for her to join him. She’d stopped in the living room and her head turned slowly as she studied the scuffed hardwood floors, low ceilings and sparse furniture. Craning her neck to the side, she studied the empty hallway.

  “You still here on your own?” she asked. “Jennifer never mentioned you having a girlfriend or getting married.” Panic flashed across her pretty features as she thrust her hand, palm down, toward the floor. “Just so we’re clear, I’m not involved in any of Jennifer’s starry-eyed matchmaking tricks. I’m perfectly happy on my own and won’t be moving back to Elk Valley. So if that talk you keep suggesting we have could possibly include Jennifer’s idea of marriage as a solution to this predicament, please know it was never my idea and I have no intention of ever coercing you into anything along those lines.”

  A rueful laugh escaped him. “As blunt as ever, I see.”

  She had the good grace to wince. “Sorry. I’ve never had a filter. And I didn’t mean to imply you wouldn’t be good husband material. Or that I don’t find you attract—” A squeak escaped her parted lips. “I mean...that other women wouldn’t find you attractive...or want to marry y—” Her eyes closed. “Oh, Lord.”

  Stifling a smile, he shook his head. “It’s just me.”

  Until tomorrow. Then the kids would move in and brighten the dark loneliness of this empty house.

  So far, the worn couch, rickety recliner and small TV had suited him just fine. Though all of it was a far cry from the affluent surroundings Katie had grown up in at Patricia’s and probably subpar to her current lifestyle in California. He hated to admit it, but this place probably looked like a hovel compared to hers.

  His cheeks flamed. “I’ve ordered a new love seat and sofa,” he said, rocking back on his heels. “They’ll be here later this week.”

  She faced him, her thoughtful gaze piercing his calm facade, making his skin prickle. “For the kids?”

  He nodded. “Patricia and Harold are helping me move Matthew’s and Emma’s beds in first thing tomorrow morning. Sophia’s crib is already set up in one bedroom and I just finished clearing out two more for Emma and Matthew.”

  “Everything’s all planned, huh?” Her posture stiffened, her low words almost an aside. “The secondary guardian steps in and my nieces and nephew pack up and head to your ranch.”

  “I’m not upper class, Katie,” he said. “But I promise you they won’t want for anything.”

  Katie studied him closer, her intense gaze still picking his thoughts apart, and then whispered, “Do you think I’m angry with you? That I’m judging you?”

  He shoved his hands in his pockets, a wry smile twisting his lips. “I’m kinda picking up on that, yeah.”

  Her shoulders slumped. She released a ragged breath then crossed the room to his side.

  Landon fixed his eyes straight ahead, focused on the framed picture on the wall across the room rather than the soft brush of Katie’s hair against his biceps. Frank, dressed in graduation regalia, smiled back at him, one of his arms around Jennifer, the other propped on Landon’s shoulder.

  “I am angry.” Katie’s voice softened. “But not with you. I was hurt when I found out you hadn’t told me about the will...” Her hand wrapped around his wrist, the soft pads of her fingers skimming over his forearm along the way. “That’s not fair to you, I know. I haven’t kept in touch or been the kind of friend to you that Frank or Jennifer was and I know I didn’t deserve it. But it’s how I felt.”

  He inclined his head, her light touch and gentle tone easing the tension in his limbs.

  “I’m angry with myself for not being here for the kids,” she added. “For Jennifer and Frank.” She leaned in and her soft breath tickled his neck. “And for you. I know you’re hurting and that you miss them. I know you love the kids and that you’re doing what you think is best. You always do.”

  Her touch was an innocent gesture meant to comfort and console, but an undercurrent—one that had existed between them for years—accompanied the action. One that had always weakened his defenses and made him long for more than friendship from her in the past.

  He faced her then, and she looked up at him, her brown eyes full of regret, grief and uncertainty. He’d felt the same painful emotions since losing Frank and Jennifer, and it was a small, if somewhat selfish, relief to know he wasn’t alone. Aching to comfort her in return, he tugged his hands from his pockets and cupped her jaw.

  “Have you ever been afraid of anything, Landon?” She placed her warm palms on his chest. Her fingertips curled into his thin T-shirt, the gentle pressure making his body hum. “Even once? Even if it was something small?”

  The uncertain tremor in her voice coaxed him closer. Remaining silent, he smoothed his thumb over her tempting bottom lip, the urge to fling responsibility over his shoulder, lower his head and touch his mouth to hers almost overwhelming.

  “Jennifer told me she thought you were too strong to know what fear was.” She stared at his mouth, the nervous tension and heat in her darkening eyes almost tangible, then pulled back and walked away. “Sometimes, I believe that.”

  Realizing his hands still hung motionless in the air, he shoved them back in his pockets and straightened.

  “What she’s asked of me...” Katie stood at the front door, her back to him. “It scares me so much. Matthew, Emma and Sophia deserve someone better equipped for this than I am.”

  Words clamored up his throat, tangled on his tongue and prodded his mouth open. He wanted to offer her reassurance. But the truth was, she wasn’t responsible or dependable enough to be a good parent for the kids, no matter how much Jennifer may have believed otherwise. And no matter how much he wanted to believe otherwise now.

  “I really am sorry I barged in on you like this, especially when you have an early day ahead tomorrow.” She glanced over her shoulder as she opened the door. “I let my temper get ahold of me as usual. It was rude and insensitive. Contrary to popular belief, I’m better than that and hope you won’t hold it against me.”

  Rascal scampered in from the porch then nudged Katie’s thigh with his nose.

  Smiling, she squatted beside him and scratched behind his ear. “What’s his name?”

  Landon rubbed the painful throb in his temple. “Rascal.”

  “Rascal,” she repeated, giggling as he licked her chin. “I bet Landon takes good care of you, yeah?” She kissed the top of Rascal’s head then stood, saying quietly, “He takes good care of everyone.”

  “Come by in the morning. Help me move the kids in?” Landon stifled a groan. Damn, he wished he’d had the good sense not to extend the invitation—but too late now. “It’d give you a chance to spend some time with them before you leave.”

  “Before I leave?” She cocked her head to the side. A new gleam, steady and defiant, brightened her eyes. “Do you think that’s what I should do? Sign my nieces and nephew over to you then take off?”

  “I didn’t say that.” But I hope like hell that’s what you’ll do. Somehow, Katie’s impulsive nature always managed to complicate everything. “We’re starting around eight after I finish morning chores. Get here a little earlier and I’ll get you that drink I promised.”

  Her lips quirked and she poked her head outside to glance at the bottle he’d left on the porch. “Coffee or beer?”

  He grinned. “Which eases that temper of yours better?”

  “Coffee,” she stated matter-of-factly then smiled at him, her expression softening. “Sweet and strong.”

  His blood rushed hotly through his veins and his abs tightened. Every nerve ending in his body tingled at her innocent words and he ached to reach out, enfold her in his arms and kiss her in the sweetest, strongest way her tone suggested.

  But...this attraction he had for her was nothing new, and more unwelcome than ever considering the ci
rcumstances.

  “I’ll have it ready.” He cleared the husky feeling from his throat, escorted her to the front porch then watched as she walked to her car. “Be careful on the way out,” he called. “There are ruts in the road so you might want to take it slow.”

  Katie didn’t answer. Just flashed a bigger smile, slid in the driver’s seat then sped away.

  Clouds of dust drifted across the moonlit valley after she departed, the routine throb of nocturnal creatures resumed and Rascal rejoined him on the porch. Everything was back in its proper place and peacefully predictable...until she returned in the morning.

  Have you ever been afraid of anything, Landon?

  He flexed his hands. The silky feel of Katie’s creamy skin still lingered on his palms and despite his best effort to ignore it, a small corner of his heart wondered if she’d changed over the years. If maybe this time, given the circumstances and Jennifer’s prodding, Katie might actually put someone else’s needs before her own. If she might try to be a better aunt to the kids, and possibly a better friend to him. Or maybe even something more?

  The thought of leaving himself vulnerable to Katie’s whims stirred an uncomfortable churn in his gut. He sat back down in his chair and reminded himself of exactly how much he had to lose.

  * * *

  “What do you want to do?”

  Katie bit her fingernail, wincing when she hit the quick, then pressed a button on the steering wheel to increase the volume of the call coming through the speakers. “That’s the problem. I don’t know. I mean I do know, but...”

  Sandra Martin, Katie’s best friend and most recent marketing client, hummed thoughtfully over the line. “It would change everything. Your entire life as you know it. You’d have to get a bigger apartment, change your work hours and diapers, choose a pediatrician, attend PTA meetings, stay home nights and weekends, and all that’s just scratching the surface. Not to mention the increase in financial burdens. There are very real, very big challenges to think about with this type of commitment.”