Quantum Series Boxed Set, Books 1-7
Page 130
“Hello?” Natalie says.
“It’s Aileen.”
“Come on in!” She buzzes me in, and the gates swing open. I drive in and park next to the usual group of drool-worthy cars. Mine looks rather nice next to them, if I do say so myself. Before the kids can bound out of the car, I stop them.
“Please remember your manners, and follow the rules in the pool.”
“We know,” Logan says impatiently. “No screaming, no running and no swimming unless an adult is with us. Can we go now?”
“Go ahead,” I say, amused by him. It’s not for nothing that I refer to him as my Little Man. He’s been the man of our family since before Maddie was born. He barely remembers his father, which I tell myself is a good thing. But it won’t be long before I’ll have to answer tough questions that I know he has but hasn’t articulated yet.
I’m retrieving the beach bag from the trunk when another car pulls into the driveway. Turning to see who it is, I lock eyes with Kristian, driving a silver sports car that roars when he accelerates into the spot next to mine.
As I wait for him to get out of the car, I can’t move or breathe. I break out in goose bumps from head to toe, my body reduced to one big nerve ending on full alert.
He unfolds himself from the low-slung car, and when he stands, I recall how much taller than me he is. He’s easily six-two or three. His hair has gotten long since I last saw him, and when he props a pair of aviators on his head, I can see that his eyes are every bit as blue as I recall. His jaw is covered in a light stubble, and he’s wearing a T-shirt with swim trunks. Right away, I notice he seems troubled.
For a long, charged moment, we stand there and stare at each other. He doesn’t say anything and neither do I. But so much is said without words. It’s still there. The crazy attraction that’s had so much of my attention since I met him in January is still alive and well and arcing between us now like a fully charged live wire.
The kids. I should go to them, but Natalie is there, and she’ll watch them for a minute.
Finally, after what seems like an hour has passed when surely it’s only been a minute or two, I clear my throat and force myself to look directly at him, which isn’t all that different from looking directly into the sun. “It’s nice to see you.”
“You, too. Are you all settled in?”
“Not quite, but we’re getting there.”
What was once so easy and effortless between us is now awkward and stilted. I feel like I’ve lost something I never really had.
“Could I carry that for you?” He gestures to the beach bag that sits at my feet.
“Oh, um, sure. Thanks.”
As he reaches for the bag, I do, too, and my hand brushes against his, sending a charge of electricity through my body. That’s all it takes to make my nipples tighten and my sex clench with need. Dear God.
His sharp intake of air tells me the brief contact had a similar effect on him.
I know I shouldn’t, but I have to ask. “Is everything all right, Kristian?”
He stares at me for another long moment, his expression unreadable. “Everything is fine. Come on, let’s go in.” Grabbing the bag, he waits for me to close the trunk of my car and gestures for me to go ahead of him into Flynn and Natalie’s house. He said everything is fine, but it isn’t. It’s not fine at all.
I only wish I knew why.
Seeing her again is like a punch to the gut delivered by a baseball bat. She looks so good. Her blonde hair has gotten longer since I last saw her, and she’s gotten some sun that gives her a sweet, healthy glow. She looks at me with big brown eyes full of wonder. What is it about her that makes me want to wrap my arms around her and protect her always? I’ve never in my life had that kind of reaction to anyone, and I have no idea how to handle it.
I forced myself to come to Mo’s party, knowing Aileen and the kids would be here. I couldn’t disappoint one of my best friends. And after spending all day answering questions about where I was yesterday, I can either show my face or have everyone speculating about what the hell is wrong with me.
I don’t want them speculating, so here I am.
As I follow Aileen into the house, it takes everything I have not to grab her hand and spin her around so I can kiss her senseless, the way I’ve wanted to since the first time I ever saw her. I want to kiss her and hold her and protect her—and her children. The only people I’ve ever felt protective toward in my life are my business partners, so feeling this way about a woman I barely know has upended my entire world.
I resist the urge to grab, spin and kiss. I’m reeling. I don’t know what to do or say or how to act, and I always know what to do and say and how to act. This isn’t me. I’m never out of control or uncertain, and I hate feeling this way. But I can’t make it stop, and I’m not sure I want it to.
When we walk into the kitchen, Natalie hugs Aileen. “You found it!”
“I made a few wrong turns, but I figured it out.”
Even her fucking voice turns me on, husky and sexy and sprinkled with infectious amusement that makes me want to lean in closer so I won’t miss a word she says.
“Now that you know how to find us, you can come over all the time.”
Flynn’s wife is a doll. I’ll admit to having had concerns about how fast they got together as well as his insistence on marrying her without a prenup only a few weeks after they met. But you can’t be around them for long and not see that they’re the real deal. I’m so happy for my friend, who deserves every good thing this world has to offer. He’d do anything for me, and the feeling is entirely mutual.
Flynn and his father are the reason for my extraordinary career. His dad gave me my first major break years ago and set me on a path toward a life that never would’ve happened without his guidance and influence. Max Godfrey is the closest thing to a father I’ve ever had, and there is literally nothing I wouldn’t do for him—or his son.
That’s one of many reasons I need to rein in this insanity with Aileen. She’s the close friend of Flynn’s wife, which puts her firmly under the protection of the Godfrey family. For me, that means hands off. I keep my hands to myself, but my eyes… They’re drawn to her every move. I watch as she goes out to the pool deck to check on her kids, who are playing in the pool with Flynn’s nephews, under the supervision of Flynn, his brother-in-law Hugh and our partner Hayden Roth.
Her kids are so damned cute. Logan has dark hair and a serious demeanor that tugs at my heart. The poor kid has been through a lot, and it’s so nice to see him laughing and having fun. His sister has the same color hair, but hers is curly. She has golden-brown eyes, the cutest dimples and an impish way about her that I find completely irresistible. Maddie doesn’t seem to have been as affected by the trauma of her mother’s illness, probably because she’s too young to understand the possible implications. But Logan… He knows. He watches over his mother and sister like the man of the family that he is, with far more awareness than any child his age should have.
Flynn takes Logan by surprise when he lifts him up high and sends him flying.
For a second, my heart stops as I wonder if Logan swims well enough to be dropped into the deep end of the pool. Then Logan pops up, his face alight with laughter as he swims back to the shallow end, looking for more of the same from Flynn.
I release the breath, reminding myself that the safety of Aileen’s children isn’t my responsibility.
I wish it was.
I no sooner have the thought than I’m again asking myself what the fuck is wrong with me. Whatever it is, I need a drink and I need it now. I head to the bar that’s been set up next to the pool and pour myself a vodka and soda—emphasis on the vodka—with a twist of lemon. I prefer whiskey, but I only drink it on vacation when I can get rip-roaring drunk and not have to function the next day.
Mo comes over to say hello and kisses my cheek. “You feeling better?”
“Yeah, I’m good. Happy birthday.”
“Thanks.” She gives m
e a look that makes me feel like she can see inside me. “You sure you’re okay? You still look a little strange around the eyes.”
That’s our Marlowe. If she thinks it, she says it, and we wouldn’t have her any other way. “I’m fine.”
“I’m right here if you need me.”
I kiss her cheek. “I know, and that means a lot.” Taking my drink, I move to safer territory, joining Jasper, Ellie, Addie, Leah, Emmett and Sebastian at one of the tables next to the pool.
“There he is,” Ellie says. “Are you feeling better?”
“I’m all good. Sorry to concern you guys.” I tell them what they want to hear, but Jasper looks me over the same way Marlowe did, and I’m sure he sees that I’m anything but fine. But unlike Mo, he won’t push the issue. Not now anyway.
I spent most of my life wishing for a family. Now I have one, and for the first time ever, I wish they cared a little less than they do. I want desperately to keep my unusual feelings for Aileen to myself. The thought of sharing them, even with the people I’m closest to, makes me panicky.
Thankfully, the party kicks into high gear with steaks and drinks and cake and laughs, and no one pays much attention to the fact that I’m quieter than usual, less engaged and thoroughly distracted by Aileen.
She catches me staring at her a couple of times, which is embarrassing. But I can’t seem to help it. If she’s in sight, I want to look at her.
We’re sitting around the fire pit after dinner, enjoying the warm evening and the company of our favorite people. Before I had my Quantum family, I’d never loved anyone in my life. But I love them. I love them all so much. I love nights like this when we’re all together, Addie on Hayden’s lap, Natalie on Flynn’s, Ellie on Jasper’s, the rest of us happily unencumbered. Wrapped up in a towel, Logan is on his mom’s lap, his eyes heavy as he snuggles up to her. And I find myself jealous of a nine-year-old because he has her arms around him.
I’m such a fool.
But then I catch her looking at me, our eyes crashing into each other, attraction arcing between us so fiercely, I can’t ignore it, even if I know I should.
Maddie comes out of the house, dragging a towel behind her. She runs toward her mom, and I watch in horror as the towel gets wrapped around her feet, sending her hurtling toward the pool deck.
I’m out of my chair and bolting for her before I’m aware of what I’m doing, but I can’t get to her in time to stop disaster.
Time stands still for a second as she crashes down, her forehead taking the brunt of the fall since her hands are wrapped up in the towel. She lets out an unholy scream that gets everyone’s attention.
I get to her first and recoil in horror at the sight of blood pouring down her sweet face from an open wound in her forehead. Grabbing the towel, I press it to her head as I wrap my arm around her, trying to keep her still so I can apply pressure to the wound.
Aileen is right there, comforting her injured child, but I can see the wild panic in her eyes at the sight of so much blood.
Maddie is inconsolable.
“Let’s get her inside,” Flynn says, taking control.
I gather her into my arms and stand to carry her in, my gaze meeting Aileen’s. “She’s okay. It looks worse than it is.” As I say the words, I hope I’m right. I carry the sobbing, screaming child inside to the kitchen where the light is better and we can see that she has a deep gash right at her hairline. “We need to get her to the ER.”
“I agree,” Flynn says.
Aileen fights a losing battle with her emotions, and tears slide down her cheeks as she wipes blood from her baby’s face.
All my protective instincts kick in. “I’ll take them.”
Natalie produces towels and an ice bag that she forces on Aileen. “Go. We’ll keep Logan for the night. Everything is fine.”
Aileen nods, but as she takes the items from Natalie, I can see that her hands are shaking violently. She turns to her son. “Will you be okay with Flynn and Nat?”
He nods, his face solemn and his eyes big with shock. “Let me know how she is.”
“I will.” Aileen kisses her son and goes ahead of me to get the doors as I carry Maddie to the car.
Chapter 5
We agree that she’s better off in her mother’s arms for the short trip to the ER than strapped into a car seat. I settle them in the other seat in my car because it’s behind hers and moving cars would take time I don't want to waste. Reaching under the dashboard, I shut off the airbag.
As I start the car and head out of the driveway, I realize my hands are shaking, too. I try to remember what’s closest to where we are, and then I decide to go straight to Cedars-Sinai because I know how to get there. I drive fast, faster than I should with such precious cargo on board.
Maddie continues to whimper and sob.
Aileen speaks softly to her, offering words of comfort, but I can hear the panic she’s trying so hard to keep hidden from her child.
I glance at her, and her gaze connects with mine. Even in the middle of a crisis, I feel the connection to her. I’m forced to tear my eyes off her to focus on the road when I’d much rather look at her.
The hospital is close and I’m driving fast, so we get there in about ten minutes. I pull up to the emergency entrance and run inside, asking for help. A nurse accompanies me to the car.
“Let me take her, honey,” I say to Aileen, who hands over her injured child. The front of Aileen’s dress is covered with blood, and her face is pale, like it was the first time I met her. I’m as worried about her as I am about Maddie. “Come on,” I say to her when I realize she’s frozen in place. “Maddie needs you.”
That seems to spur her to move, and we hustle inside, following the direction of the nurse, who leads us straight to an exam room. I’m thankful that we won’t have to wait hours. I leave them only to move my car to an actual parking space and return in under a minute. I’m running on pure adrenaline.
“What happened?” the nurse asks as she settles Maddie into a bed that makes her seem so tiny.
“She tripped on a towel and fell on a pool deck,” I say. “Landed face-first.”
“Aww, poor baby.” The nurse gives Aileen some medicated wipes so she can clean the blood off Maddie’s face. “We need to get her checked in. Can you come with me for a minute?” she asks Aileen.
She glances at me.
“Go ahead. I’ll be right here.”
She doesn’t want to go, but she kisses Maddie’s cheek. “I’ll be right back. Mr. Kristian will be here with you.”
“Don’t go, Mommy,” Maddie says, sobs hiccupping through her tiny body.
“Is there any way you can check her in right here?” I ask the nurse.
“I’ll see what I can do.”
She leaves the room, and Aileen sends me a grateful smile. “Thank you.”
“Whatever you need. Both of you.” Forever, I want to add, but this doesn’t seem like the right time. I hold back a laugh that would be wildly inappropriate under the circumstances. I’m seriously losing my fucking mind.
Another nurse comes into the cubicle, pushing a mobile computer station. She goes through the steps of checking Maddie into the ER. “Insurance?” she asks.
“We’re between plans at the moment,” Aileen says, her face flushing with embarrassment that infuriates me.
“I’ll pay whatever charges there are,” I say.
“That’s not necessary,” Aileen says. “I can pay for it.” She hands over a credit card.
I decide we’ll argue about that after the nurse leaves the room. She takes the rest of the information and lets us know the doctor will be in shortly.
“I’ll get you enrolled in the Quantum plan on Monday,” I tell her when we’re alone.
“I don’t start for another week.”
“I don’t care.” The words come out harsher than intended. I soften my tone when I say, “You shouldn’t be without insurance.”
“I’m usually not, but the move and e
verything… I had a plan in New York that doesn’t cover us here.”
Now I’m afraid that she thinks I’m criticizing her, but before I can correct that, the doctor comes in to see Maddie. He determines she needs stitches and recommends they be done by a plastic surgeon. “I’ve paged her, and she’ll be here within the hour.” He also orders a CT scan to check for a concussion and to make sure she’s not bleeding inside.
As new tears leak from the corners of her eyes, Aileen thanks the doctor while continuing to cling to her little girl’s hand.
“I’ll call Flynn and let them know she’s okay,” I say when we’re alone again.
“That’d be good. Thank you for everything.”
I’m standing next to her so it’s easy enough to put my arm around her and kiss her forehead. “I didn’t do anything.”
She looks up at me, her heart in her eyes. “You’re here, and that means everything.”
Fuck me to hell and back again. When she looks at me like that and says such sweet words, all my resolve to keep my distance disappears like I never had it to begin with. I want her. I burn for her. I need her. I crave her. And then she leans her head on my chest, and I’m fucking lost.
I’m supposed to be calling the others, who’ve got to be worried as they wait to hear from us. But for as long as she wants to lean against me, I’m not letting go.
I shouldn’t be doing this. I shouldn’t be letting him comfort me this way, but I can’t seem to get the rest of me to cooperate with the message my brain is sending out. It feels so damned good to be close to him, to let his heat warm the chill that invaded my body the minute I saw the blood on my baby’s face.
His hand slides up and down my arm. He’s comforting me, but his touch is like a jolt of electricity waking up the rest of me to his nearness.
I’ll never forget the way he reacted when Maddie fell. He saw her going down before I did and was out of his seat and running for her before she even landed. That makes him that much more appealing to me. I wonder how it’s possible to be even more attracted to him than I was before.