Reappearance of Summmer

by D J Small

  ~~~

  Several ideas went through Summer’s mind as she tried to figure out the best way to tell Val she was in therapy while they finished their dinner. She believed there was no good way for her to tell the ex-wife she’d abandoned that she was finally getting the help she tremendously needed. While telling Val occupied one part of her mind, another part of it fought against the idea, telling her there was no reason Val needed to know about her therapy. Summer released a quiet sigh. Val deserved to know the truth, but she didn’t want to ruin the peculiar place they had come to.

  It almost seemed like their relationship before the crash, but Summer knew there were a number of serious conversations she and Val needed to have before their interaction resembled what it had been in the past—if it could go back to that. Summer still needed to figure out what she wanted, because at present, she did not know and wasn’t certain if she ever would. Summer had vowed to be there for her, and would continue to do so, but how it all connected, she wasn’t sure. It had to mean something though, or so she thought.

  “How is the mental health initiative going?” Val asked, interrupting the confusing thoughts running through Summer’s mind. “I haven’t heard you talk about it in awhile.”

  Summer chuckled. “The initiative is coming along quite nicely. Kareem is planning to visit a few veterans facilities across the country to start up outreach program.”

  “Will you be going with him?” Val asked, sounding genuinely interested in hearing about the program.

  Summer nodded. “A couple of them. It depends on my schedule. At some point, I will have to go back to California and check on the progress there, and I also have my other veteran programs.”

  Val smiled, and it caused Summer’s lips to form a faint one of their own. “Would an endorsement from the White House help either of your programs?”

  Summer got up from the table, chuckling. “An endorsement from you, Madam President, would help any cause.”

  “Don’t you try and smooth talk me, Colonel.”

  Summer laughed as she began to gather their dinner dishes. “I wouldn’t dare to do such a thing.” She took Val’s plate and asked, “I know you probably haven’t thought about it due to everything in Iraq, but do you have any vacation plans for when you can take time off?”

  Val blew out a breath as she got up to help Summer. “If I ever get around to having some time to myself, which we all know is an illusion, I think I’ll probably go to Camp David.” Summer turned to look at Val when she fell quiet, and saw the somber expression on her face. “We still don’t have their bodies back.”

  Summer bit the inside of her lip, not sure what to say at the sudden change in conversation. Retrieving the soldiers’ bodies had been a priority of Val’s since the news broke, but Summer doubted they would ever get them. She knew Val wanted to get closure for the families, but there was a chance it would not be possible due to the circumstances. “We’ll get them back, Val.” Summer said gently, despite what she thought. She decided to move the conversation along because the topic would only cause Val to punish herself more than she already did. “Any plans to invite Ken and Becky to Camp David?”

  Val shot her a small, grateful smile before she started to laugh. “If I go to Camp David, it would be to get away from reality, not a chance to torture myself.” She expelled a soft snort. “If I wanted to be put through the wringer then I would invite my parents.”

  The two of them laughed as they went into the kitchen. As she placed their dinner plates on the counter next to the sink, Summer remarked, “Ah, so there won’t be any Kennedy-like pictures being taken while you’re there?”

  “Oh,” Val began with sharp laugh, “the Hawkins dream of being the black Kennedys failed when I was publicly abandoned by my wife in the middle of my first term.”

  Every muscle in Summer’s body tightened, and the levity on Val’s face vanished as they registered what she had said. “Summer, I’m sorry. I was only joking. I didn’t mean anything by it.”

  “Yeah, well it was a terrible joke,” Summer countered before going back to the dining room to retrieve the rest of their dinner dishes.

  Val followed her and explained, “You can’t be mad at me for that. You and I have fallen into a false sense of security the last few months, and because of it, I feel comfortable enough to make such jokes when I shouldn’t.”

  “The fact that you were stupid enough to get comfortable around me means I can get upset by the joke,” Summer countered, her tone short and laced with irritation.

  Val crossed her arms over her chest and chuckled quietly. “And there it is.”

  “There what is?”

  Val gestured towards her and replied, “The other shoe.” Summer’s brows knitted together as she looked at Val, but she shook her head and took the dishes in her hand to the kitchen. Again, Val followed her. “I knew you would eventually go back to being pissed at me for no apparent reason.”

  Taken off-guard by the allegation, Summer argued, “That’s not fair, Val. You even said the joke had gone too far.”

  “No,” Val countered, “what isn’t fair is how you have placed all this blame on me when I didn’t do a damn thing.”

  Summer quickly realized where the conversation was headed and sighed. It was a conversation Val deserved. “I don’t blame you.” She walked over to the island, taking hold of its edge as she stared down at the marble countertop and prepared to go down a path she wasn’t sure she was ready for.

  Another second passed before Summer quietly admitted, “I have never blamed you. The only person I blame is myself. From the way I treated you to the way I left. None of it was fair to you, and it was the epitome of me being selfish, but I didn’t know what to do.” Summer lifted her head and held Val’s gaze. “My anger towards you is misplaced. When I look at you, all I see is every single failure my crash caused. I failed my mission, I failed my country, and I failed my wife.” A sad smile played on her lips. “We both know I don’t accept failure well.”

  Val grunted softly and moved closer to the other side of the island. “You are huge pain in the ass when you don’t succeed at something.”

  Summer chuckled then a brief silence lingered between them.

  “You didn’t fail me, and you didn’t fail the mission. You did everything right during the flight, but an unexpected situation happened, and neither of us could have foreseen it.” Val released a heavy sigh. “As much as you blame yourself, I feel responsible for your crash.”

  “Val, it wasn’t—”

  “I am the commander in chief, Summer,” Val interjected, cutting her off. “I gave the order.”

  “Not directly.”

  Val cast an annoyed glare at her. “You’re splitting hairs, Colonel.” She pressed her lips together. “You almost died because of me.”

  Summer didn’t know what to say considering the amount of emotional and mental baggage she carried because of her crash, but she realized they were both in the same boat. “It’s like you told me, something outside our control happened, and it hurt us both.”

  “Isn’t that the truth,” Val commented with a small sigh.

  Since they were already having loaded conversations, Summer decided to tell Val about her sessions with Kareem. She started to put away the leftovers. “I’m in therapy.”

  Summer focused on putting the leftover chicken in one of the storage containers, but she could feel Val’s eyes on her. Chancing a glance, Summer looked up from the container and found Val staring at her with wide eyes. Needing to fill the stunned silence and not wanting to make a big deal out of the announcement, Summer continued to speak, hoping the reason why she wanted to tell Val would come to her. “Originally when I decided to get help I wanted to be helpful, for you. I don’t know if I want to be reactivated, but I want to be useful again. Telling me you couldn’t use me because of all the shit going on with me, it…it hit me hard.”

  She looked at Val, who seemed to be in a permanent state of shock. Summer tu
rned and went over to the refrigerator to put the container of chicken in it. “I honestly don’t know if it’s working. I mean I go in there, and Kareem, he tries, but I can’t.” She closed the door the refrigerator. “This guy is one of the top psychologists in the country, and he specializes in—”

  Summer came to an abrupt stop when arms wrapped around her midsection. It took her a moment, but eventually she relaxed into Val’s embrace. The two of them stood there not saying anything for a few minutes. Being in Val’s arms eased some of the anxiety Summer felt about revealing her therapy sessions to her. “I am so proud of you,” Val whispered near Summer’s ear.

  The statement caused tears to suddenly form in Summer’s eyes, and her throat tightened up with emotion. She placed her hand on Val’s forearm and gave it a gentle squeeze. It took her another second before she could say anything. “I don’t know if there is anything for you to be proud about.”

  Val gave her a gentle squeeze and said, “The fact that you are going is a lot for me to be proud about. You may not think it’s working, but keep going. Kareem knows it’s going to take a while for you to get to the point where you can speak to him, and it’s probably going to take a while longer for you to work out everything, but don’t stop going.” She chuckled. “I know you want to be your stubborn self, Colonel, but in this instance, don’t.”

  Despite her tears, Summer chuckled and remarked, “I do like to be stubborn.” Val hummed in agreement. Summer enjoyed being in Val’s arms for another second, then said, “But would you like to know something, Madam President?”

  “What’s that?” Val asked, and Summer grinned upon hearing the skeptical tone in her voice.

  Summer moved out of her embrace, regretting the decision to do so, but what she had in mind was a bigger payoff. Val eyed her warily, and Summer’s grin widened as she took a few steps away from her. “There is no one who is more stubborn than the president of the United States.” She began to laugh. “When you don’t get your way, you start swearing and threatening people, and damn, you put me to shame.”

  Val scowled and narrowed her eyes at Summer. “How dare you slander the president like that.”

  “It’s not slander if I have witnessed it with my own two eyes, ma’am,” Summer said with the hugest smile on face.

  When Val took a step towards her, Summer took one back and closer to the doorway leading to the dining room. “Come here, Summer, so I can kick your ass.”

  Summer began to laugh and she winked at Val. “You got to catch me first.” She took off into the dining room and ran out into the hallway, running for the steps. Their laughs echoed through the Residence and off the halls of the White House as they chased each other. During their run through the White House, Summer finally understood why she had told Val about her therapy. Not only did Val give her the support she unknowingly needed with no question, but she also wanted her life back, and telling Val about her sessions with Kareem was Summer’s way of letting her know she was trying. She didn’t know if it would amount to anything, but at this moment it felt pretty good.

  Chapter Sixteen

  An imperceptible smile crept onto Val’s face as she gazed at the Washington Monument in the distance. She took a small sip from her glass of bourbon. It was late, and she should have been in bed, but she had just gotten up to the Residence and needed a moment to decompress. After her and Summer’s impromptu chase around the White House, which had ended when they went to the main kitchen to have ice cream, Val had gone back to work in an amazing mood, but it was ruined the moment she had entered the Oval.

  The Security Council and Secretary Kanaan continued to object to her decision to send more troops to Kuwait, and the intelligence community believed the insurgents were obtaining a firm stronghold in Iraq and would inevitably infiltrate the government, potentially putting military personnel at great risk. No one wanted the United States to get caught in the crosshairs just because they were trying to help an ally. Val had stood her ground about sending troops should the Alliance request their assistance, but there was another reason why she was being adamant about the decision.

  She wanted Hasem and Nasir out of power. The information she had gotten on the two men a couple of months prior, along with the conversations with Basara where she had subtly gleaned information from him, told Val they were involved with the terrorists in some way. Val needed to find a way to present the information to Basara, so he could pass it along to the other leaders in order for them to take action against the two men. Once a plan of action was executed, the Alliance would need help from its allies. Usurping the two men would create chaos until elections were held, and the people needed protecting.

  Val drew in a deep breath and took another sip of her bourbon, moving her thoughts to a lighter topic. She would lose sleep about the situation in Iraq throughout the night anyway. The smile reappeared as thoughts of Summer filtered into her mind. She was actually getting the help she needed, and had actually told her about it. Hope started to bubble up inside of her, but Val tried to ignore it.

  She still didn’t know what any of this meant, but knew how significant this was for Summer, and possibly for them. At the same time, Val knew it could mean nothing—Summer wasn’t one to admit she needed help, let alone acknowledge she was receiving it, so the possibility of her giving up on therapy could happen, especially since she had told Val about it. She sighed and finished off her bourbon, and despite herself, Val silently hoped that Summer wouldn’t give up on therapy.

  Val stood from the couch and headed inside. As she made her way to the bedroom, Val heard Agent Banner call out for her. “Madam President, a moment please.”

  Val turned, seeing the Secret Service agent rushing towards her and frowned. “Kat, what’s the matter? Did something happen?”

  “I’m not certain, ma’am. Mr. Olsen is here. He needs to speak with you, but will only speak to you,” Agent Banner informed her.

  “Did he tell you if something happened to Summer?” Val asked as worry started to fill her.

  Agent Banner grimaced. “He didn’t say, ma’am.”

  Val scowled. The lack of information didn’t alleviate her worries, and she was seconds away from losing her presidential decorum. “Take me to him,” Val demanded.

  Banner nodded, and Val followed her as she began to make her way down the stairs. They didn’t have to go too far; in the middle of the main corridor on the first floor of the Residence stood Ryan, an anxious expression replacing the usual smile on face.

  “Mr. Olsen, what can I do for you at this hour?”

  Ryan may have visibly relaxed upon seeing her, but the tension around his eyes remained, and he appeared to be nervous. He cleared his throat and said, “Madam President, I apologize for bothering you at this late hour, but…” he sighed and ran his hand through his short sandy blonde hair. His hazel eyes met Val’s. “I didn’t know what else to do.”

  Val moved closer to him and placed a hand on his upper arm. “Ryan, what’s going on? What’s happened to Summer?” She swallowed to force down the emotion wanting to come over her.

  Ryan released a frustrated breath. “She’s fine, well, she hasn’t been hurt.” Val nodded, relieved to know Summer hadn’t been physically harmed, but it didn’t explain why the head of her security detail was at the White House. “But her medication has stopped working. She screams all night long, and they are chilling, ma’am. Myself or someone else from the team can usually get her to calm down or wake her up, but lately it’s like she’s trapped in some sort of hell and can’t leave it.”

  Val stared at him confused as to why he was telling her this. Yes, it hurt to hear Summer was being tortured by whatever nightmares plagued her at night, but she didn’t know what he wanted her to do. “And what do you want from me?”

  Ryan’s Adam’s apple jumped as he swallowed a few times, then he said, with some hesitation, “I thought you might be able to help with calming her down. We have tried, and she starts back up five minutes later.”


  Val couldn’t stop her eyes from widening with surprise. He was asking a lot from her. His request would ruin the tentative peace between her and Summer, but she didn’t want her to suffer. Val sighed. “Did she explicitly ask you to do this?”

  Ryan gave his head a slight shake. “No, ma’am.”

  “Dammit, Ryan,” Val said with another sigh. This would put her in one hell of a situation.

  “President Hawkins, you are the only person close enough that I trust to help me with this.”

  Val tried to scowl, but only succeeded in frowning at him. “She is going to be pissed about this.” She looked at Banner. “Have a town car meet us at the start of the tunnels. If the press finds out about this, Summer will be unbearable. That’s if she doesn’t go off the handle about this.”

  Agent Banner nodded and left to go complete the task Val had given her. Val looked at Ryan. “You said her medication stopped working, what medication?”

  Ryan grimaced. “She takes sleeping pills at night because her nightmares can be really bad, but for some reason they haven’t been working the last couple of days.”

  “My good…” Val trailed off, not wanting to believe this was how Summer had been managing her demons for the last two years. She began to wonder why the medication had suddenly stopped working, and what started off as one train of thought led to others, causing Val to get buried under worry and guilt because of the hell Summer was going through. Before the worst of her guilt got a chance to take hold, Banner’s voice broke through the horde of thoughts.

  “Ma’am, a car is waiting at the entrance of the tunnels for you.”

  Val nodded, and she, Banner, and Ryan headed for the elevator that would take them down to the secret tunnels below the White House. The three of them walked in silence. There were several questions Val wanted to ask Ryan, but she didn’t feel right having him answer them. It would be a breach of the trust he shared with Summer, and Val knew she needed at least one person she could trust. They reached the exit for the tunnels, where a car idled in front of the reinforced doors.