Ambrosia

by Erin Noelle

  “Yeah, I heard and please stop saying you’re sorry for everything. God, it makes me feel awful that you’re always having to apologize to me,” I said frustrated at the entire conversation. “Look, go do what you’ve gotta do. You’ve got people that need you. I just want you to really think about what you want and where you see this going. I can’t do this by myself and that’s what I feel I’m doing right now. So let me know what you want, but something’s gotta change, Mase.”

  I hung up the phone without saying anything else and before he could reply. Ten seconds later it vibrated in my hand with a text.

  Mason (3:22PM): You forgot to say I love you.

  Me (3:23PM): You know I love you, but sometimes that’s not enough.

  Mason (3:35PM): Don’t be stubborn. I love you.

  I decided to take a nap before going to Mina’s party. I felt terrible, I didn’t know what to think about anything anymore, and I just wanted to sleep and make it all go away for a little while. I didn’t think I was being unreasonable to want to see him more than once a month, to talk to him for one short phone call each day, but I also knew that I was playing with fire by basically giving him an ultimatum ~ change or else. I laid my head down on the pillow and passed out within seconds.

  The room was pitch black when I woke up. I looked over to the alarm clock and saw that it was eight fifteen. Shit! I had slept way too long! I sent Mina a quick text that I was running a bit late and would meet her at nine thirty, and began getting ready. I had never been to a bachelorette party before; Mina was my only crazy friend getting married at twenty. I wasn’t sure quite what to wear, but I knew that we were going to a dueling piano bar to begin the night. Mina had told me that she had a fake ID for me, and I hoped that it wouldn’t be an issue. Nonetheless, I opted to dress up quite a bit more than I normally did, in hopes I looked a little older.

  An hour later, I was dressed in a form fitting black sleeveless dress that hit mid-thigh with black strappy heels. The dress was very plain in the front, but the back was absolutely stunning~ completely fabric-less down to the small of my back. I applied my makeup heavier than I usually wore it and styled my hair in an up-do with loose hanging tendrils to leave my back exposed. Looking in the mirror, I hardly recognized the young woman staring back at me. Evie would’ve been so proud at how I looked, but I couldn’t help but wonder what she would think about everything else going on. I hadn’t had time to mentally revisit my last conversation with Mason since waking up from my nap, and as the insecurities and uncertainties of where my life was going loomed over me, I took a deep breath and put up a mental block. I didn’t have time to analyze any of that. I needed to go out and have a good time and ensure that Mina had a memorable night. I needed a break from thinking.

  At a little after one in the morning, the limo pulled up to Empty’s and all of us girls spilled out, giggling and acting silly from way too much alcohol consumption. We had a blast at the piano bar singing and dancing, and had ended up spending the entire night there before coming to our home base. We were supposed to meet Noah and all of the guys from the bachelor party there for a night cap. As usual, the guys had claimed their normal table, each sitting in the same chair they always sat in.

  Even though I knew they had seen us come in, I jokingly sneaked up behind Max and put my hands over his eyes and whispered, “Guess who.”

  “Hmmm. I bet it’s someone that’s dressed in pink,” he joked.

  “Wrong. No pink at all tonight,” I said laughing as I dropped my hands and allowed him to spin around and face me.

  “Wow! Look at you girls. Impressive,” he complimented all of us standing around the table. Mina was already in Noah’s lap licking his neck like a ravenous nymph. I couldn’t help but chuckle at the two of them. Max slung one arm around my shoulder and joined me in laughing at the PDA clinic being put on by the engaged lovebirds.

  All of a sudden, my face got really flushed and I felt a bit nauseous. Assuming it was the excessive amount of alcohol that had finally caught up with me, I excused myself to the restroom to splash my face with water and cool off. While I was in the stall, I checked my phone to see that I had missed a call and message from Mason. I felt bad for acting selfish and immature earlier in the day and wanted to tell him how much I loved him and couldn’t wait to see him in the morning. Without listening to the message, I hit the “call back” button on my phone and waited for him to answer

  “Hello?” a female voice said into the phone, and I immediately knew who it was.

  “Let me talk to Mason, Bentley,” I demanded.

  “He’s in the shower right now. Can I take a message?” She asked in a fake ass sweet voice.

  “Really? He’s in the shower? Where are y’all?” I had only thought my face was flushed before. She was going to cause me to burst into flames I was so hot.

  “We are at his apartment. Is this Scarlett?”

  “Yes, this is Scarlett. Why are you there and why is he in the shower?” Alcohol had pretty much erased any filters I may have normally had when speaking to her.

  Giggling into the phone, she said, “We have been celebrating Jobu’s Rum invitation to go on tour with VanderBlue and things got a little out of control so he needed a shower.”

  “Who’s all there? Let me talk to Cruz or Sophie.” I spat.

  “It’s just me and Rat here, Angel,” her voice morphed from sugary sweet to mega-bitch. “He and I had a long talk tonight, and I think it’s time you just flew on along to someone else. He’s gonna be gone for the next six months and doesn’t have time to babysit or worry about you anymore. Don’t worry though, I’ll be sure to take good care of him. I’ve had plenty of practice and know just what he likes.”

  Just then I heard Mason’s voice in the background call out, “B? Where are you? Bring me that towel right now!”

  In a whisper, she returned to the phone and said, “Gotta go, he’s ready for round two,” before hanging up on me.

  Sitting there staring at my phone, my body began to tremble with pure rage. I could not believe the conversation that had just taken place. He didn’t even have the decency to talk to me and tell me he didn’t want to do this anymore before hooking up with her of all people. I couldn’t believe that had just happened. What was I going to do? Where was I going to live? Holy shit.

  I didn’t know what to do next, but I knew that sitting in the bathroom stall alone wasn’t going to fix anything. I decided that I needed another drink, and I would just deal with all of it later. It was the only thing I could think of to numb me to the overpowering despair that was slowly taking over.

  I rejoined the party out in the bar, trying to look like nothing had happened, that my life had not just changed with one phone call. Unfortunately, Max knew something was wrong the moment he saw my face.

  He motioned for me to go join him and I scurried over to his chair.

  “What’s wrong? What happened?” he asked concerned.

  “I need a drink,” I answered.

  “Ok, I’ll get you a drink, but what happened? You were in such a good mood when you got here.”

  “It’s over between Mason and me. He’s with Bentley again,” I replied emotionless. Operation shutdown was underway.

  “What do you mean?” he asked unbelievably.

  “I just got off the phone with ‘em. Jobu’s Rum is going on tour with VanderBlue and Mason and Bentley got back together tonight,” I answered. Turning around to look at him, I pleaded with him, “Can we get out of here? I just want to get somewhere so that I can drink until I pass out. I just want to not think about anything for a while.”

  Without saying another word, he grabbed my hand and pulled me through the bar, out the door, and put me in his car. Luckily my car was already close to his place, since he lived at the same apartment complex as Noah and Mina. We pulled into his parking spot after a short, silent road trip and I followed him inside. He led me straight to the kitchen and grabbed two shot glasses from the cabinet.

&nb
sp; “Are you sure you want to do this?” His piercing blue eyes had just as much pain in them as I felt.

  “Pour them,” I responded.

  He grabbed a bottle of tequila out from the freezer and filled up each of the tiny glasses. We both grabbed one and held it out in the air to toast.

  “To forgetting it all… at least for tonight,” he offered.

  “To forgetting it all,” I repeated. We clinked our glasses together and tossed the potent liquid down the backs of our throats, slamming the empties to the bar. I shuddered as I felt the burn down my spine, but couldn’t help but smile a bit once it had settled.

  Max held up the bottle and asked, “Another?”

  Greedy to further escape the sorrow and destruction I felt, I nodded yes.

  Six shots later for each of us, Max and I had moved to the couch in his living room, joking around, flipping through the channels. I had stolen the remote from him when he had left it on a sports talk show for entirely too long, and he lunged at me to try and get it back. I unsteadily jumped off the couch, just out of his reach and took off running around his apartment trying to keep it from him. He chased after me, and due to the lack of places to run and my being way more than a little tipsy, he had me cornered quickly. We were both laughing so hard we could barely move, but instead of conceding defeat, I made a final attempt to escape. As I tried to run by him, he slung his arm around my waist and tackled me into the couch.

  I couldn’t stop giggling as he tried to wrestle the remote away out of my hands. Lying flat on my back with him straddling my thighs, he tried to use his weight to hold me in place. Changing his strategy, he began to tickle me to see if I would drop the treasured item, which I did… over the arm of the couch above my head.

  “You little brat!” he joked. He stretched his body forward , hovering over mine, and reached over the furniture to grab the remote off of the floor. As he brought his arm back over and rocked his weight backwards, his body rubbed against mine and I whimpered. His stormy eyes shot to mine and I swallowed hard .

  He relaxed his body so that he was lying on top of me, but not crushing me with his weight. Our faces were mere inches from one another, and I couldn’t do anything to control the pounding of my heart or the fluttering in my stomach. He leaned his forehead down so that it was touching mine.

  “Scarlett,” he breathed.

  “Max,” I whispered back.

  In the few silent moments that followed our names being spoken, as we looked helplessly lost in each other’s eyes, the thought crossed my mind that these drunken tequila nights I had read about over and over again never ended up good. But despite that knowledge, when he brought his hand to my face and began brushing his thumb back and forth on my cheek, I closed my eyes and leaned my face into his touch. I felt his cock jerk against my thigh and I muffled my moan.

  “Look at me Scarlett,” he said quietly. I opened my eyes and looked at his handsome face.

  “I wanna kiss you so fucking bad right now,” he confessed. His words made me clamp my legs together, trying to ignore the building ache.

  Allowing the tequila to block out all the reasons why his idea was a really horrible one, and instead remembering what we had toasted to with our first shot of the night ~ to forgetting it all, I selfishly replied, “Then kiss me.”

  MASON

  I had been looking forward to going home to see Scarlett since the minute I had left her the last time. Living apart was fucking killing me; I had already decided when I went back for the bachelor party weekend, I was going to ask her to move in with me since her semester was over. I just couldn’t handle it anymore. My stress level when I wasn’t with her was out of control, and I had basically become a dick to be around. I was constantly struggling internally about the right thing to do by her or by the band, and knew that if she lived in Austin with me, I could do both.

  I hated the fact that I wasn’t able to make Noah’s bachelor party, but even more because it was one more night that I spent away from Angel. I had good intentions of going back to see her at least weekly, but our schedule had been so incredibly busy, that all I did was eat, sing, and sleep. However, I knew when Bentley had told me who was going to be at the show and why we had to play, that there was no option. I had called the guys and told them about the delay and we got our asses ready as soon as possible.

  The afternoon phone conversation with Scarlett had gone less than ideal. I knew she was frustrated with how the first month had gone, shit, so was I, but I had no idea she was as pissed as she was. How could she even think that I didn’t see her as a part of my future? Did she even listen to me when I talked to her sometimes? I knew that I just needed to get through this performance and then I could get home to her to talk, and possibly fuck, some sense into her. I didn’t want to be without her for another day.

  Knowing what was at stake in that one performance ~ the opportunity to open for a chart-topping band, I felt nerves in my stomach for the first time in years before grabbing the microphone. I knew halfway through our first song that we were on and sounded good, I only hoped the people who mattered agreed. We waited in a back room for Bentley after our set, not sure if we would find out the decision immediately. After what seemed like hours, she walked in with a huge smile on her face and told us to pack out bags because we were going on a long road trip.

  Elated does not even begin to describe the overwhelming feeling of joy that I experienced when I heard the words come out of her mouth. After we all congratulated one another, I couldn’t wait to call Scarlett and tell her the good news, even though I knew she was out with Mina and the girls. I hoped she’d at least have a chance to check her messages at some point. Hearing her voice on the greeting brought a smile to my face and I left her a short message.

  “Hey Scarlett, please give me a call when you get a chance. I’ve got something important I want to tell you.”

  I headed back to my apartment to get a good night’s rest before making the drive the following morning. I had just gotten settled and was about to jump in the shower when I heard a knock on the door. Assuming it was one of my band mates, I opened the door with just a towel wrapped around me to see Bentley standing there in a nearly sheer night gown.

  Her eyes roaming up and down my body, she asked, “Do you have any milk I can borrow?” she purred.

  “Milk? Really? At nearly two o clock in the fucking morning, you need milk?” Her attempts to get me to sleep with her were borderline pathetic, and I was getting tired of telling her to leave me alone. It also pissed me off that she asked for milk because that made me think of Scarlett and her milk obsession, and I remembered that it was Bentley’s fault I hadn’t seen her in over a month.

  Pushing her way past me in to my place, “God, you don’t have to be such an asshole. Fine, I’ll leave you alone. You got all fucking boring anyways. What did she do to you? Suck all of the fun out? You don’t drink, smoke, go out… nothing anymore. What kind of rock star are you supposed to be?”

  Ignoring all of her ridiculous questions, I replied, “Help yourself to what you need from the kitchen, I’m getting in the shower. Lock the door on your way out please.”

  When I got out of the shower I noticed that the towel I had out was missing. That fucking bitch. I yelled out, “B? Where are you? Bring me that towel right now!”

  I climbed back into the shower to be hidden from her and a minute or so later she sauntered in with my towel across her arm. “Oh come on Rat, its not like I haven’t seen you naked before. You are pathetic.”

  “Fuck you, Bentley. Just do your job and leave me alone. Get out of my apartment like I already told you to do.”

  Thirty minutes and a beer later I had calmed down from the B incident, but was concerned that Scarlett still hadn’t called or texted back since my last message. Going on tour changed things quite a bit, but that didn’t change the fact I wanted her with me all the time. I hoped she was ready to visit a lot of new places. My biggest concern was her taking time off for scho
ol, but an opportunity to travel like that was once in a life time and I hoped she be up for the adventure.

  Crashing in my bed for what I hoped was the last time alone, I fell asleep thinking about my angel curled up in my arms.

  CHAPTER THIRTEEN ~

  BAD DECISIONS

  Collide ~ Dishwalla

  Gone Gone Gone ~ Phillip Phillips

  Scene Two: Roger Rabit ~ Sleeping With Sirens

  Whatever It Takes ~ Lifehouse

  SCARLETT

  Max’s lips crashed onto mine as we became a needy, voracious mess of mouths and hands and limbs. We pulled and tugged at each other’s clothes as we kissed, sucked, and bit each other like wild animals. Moments later we were both stripped naked and I was lying underneath him, reveling in the feel of his skin against mine. Over the next twenty minutes, our actions were completely thoughtless. I was Kiera, he was Kellan, and all thoughts of Denny or Mason or anyone else were totally buried under the alcohol, and the combination of our need to feel wanted and our want to feel needed.

  We groped and caressed one another until neither of us could resist the desire to be intimately connected. With our bodies glistening in sweat, our labored breaths gasping for air, and our intoxicated minds lost a million miles away; Max positioned himself between my legs and buried himself inside of me in one swift thrust. We both screamed out at his initial entrance as my body stretched to accommodate him. After pulling out slightly, he plunged back inside of me, and several strokes of his hips later, he had established a steady rhythm. We were lost in the madness of the entire experience, eyes closed, forgetting it all.

  As I felt my climax building, I wrapped my legs around his hips, holding his body close to mine. He buried his face into my neck and my fingers ran through his hair, tugging gently.

  “Oh my God, Sam, you feel amazing,” he growled into my ear.

  I froze instantly at his use of Evie’s nickname for me. My eyes flew open, and I saw his equally-panicked face staring back at me. Neither of us said a word or moved an inch for a few moments. I sobered up immediately, suddenly aware of my surroundings and the happenings of the previous day and night.