by Tara Brown
We got halfway across the graveyard when Coop stopped. He turned back toward the two men, pondering something. Then he broke into a run, sprinting in his suit and leather shoes across the grass, not minding the other dead people or their graves. He shoved one of the men and took the shovel, shouting something about burying his own fucking sister.
He shoveled like a madman, shaking his head and cussing as tears streamed his cheeks.
His mother opened her mouth, but his father steered her away, whispering something.
Coop’s brother and sisters gave me a questioning stare, but I didn't have an answer I could share with them.
So we stood and watched as the strongest man in the world broke. He shouted, calling her a traitor and throwing dirt. He stopped using the shovel and dropped to his knees, pushing the mounds of black earth with his hands.
He slumped after a moment and cried. Tears filled my eyes, making him abstract and the moment beautiful in a tragic way.
Mitch pulled from my arms, walking with Jack to the graveside. Jack took the shovel from the ground and Mitch took the one from the confused worker. They silently lifted the dirt and dumped it into the hole.
Coop remained on his knees, staring as tears ran down his cheeks.
His mother wept and his sisters covered their faces.
Only his father appeared to understand what the moment of mental breakdown was caused by.
Each of us would have a moment like this one.
Watching him, and this, play out was a glimpse into the future, the near future. This madness and sorrow was the only possible outcome.
The wind crossed me again, making me shiver and giving me the sense someone was watching me.
Turning around, I saw him behind a tree. He wore the same broken look as Coop. Servario didn't glance in my direction. His eyes were solely focused on Coop.
I suspected he was making himself watch. It was his penance for killing her, seeing the aftermath of his actions.
I knew that pain.
When he saw me staring at him he walked off, heading for the black car on the road across from us.
It was a dark day that nothing would make lighter.
When I checked back on my son, he and Jack tamped the spot and handed the shovels back to the workers before they helped Coop to his feet.
The three of them walked in silence, holding each other. They passed Coop’s family, clearly not interested in the celebration of her life that was planned for afterward.
We went to the car, each of us plagued by our own brand of sadness.
The hotel was a short drive. Coop held my hand, not letting it go and not speaking. When we got there I spoke to Mitch, “We have to go to the room, get you cleaned up.”
He glimpsed down at the graveyard dirt that covered him and wrinkled his nose. “Okay.”
Coop got out with us, holding my hand but continuing to stare off into space.
I slid the key in and opened the door for Mitch. My mom slipped her gun back under the pillow next to her, completely unbeknownst to Jules who was watching cartoons. “He needs a shower.”
“Okay.” She turned to Coop. “How is your family, dear?”
He shrugged.
I gestured my head toward his room. “I’m going—”
“Of course.” She smiled. I closed the door and helped Coop to his room next door. He put the key in, pausing as he took in the dirt on his hands.
His eyes lifted, again filling with tears. I opened the door and helped him inside, not sure if I should leave or stay.
His huge hand reached out, wrapping around my waist, pulling me into him. He didn't try to kiss me or say anything. He pulled me to the bathroom as the door swung shut. He walked straight into the shower and turned it on, letting the water soak us both in our clothes.
It was not the mourning I had imagined, but it was something we both needed.
He bent forward, still holding me tightly and whispered, “We are not having a deep conversation about what this means.”
I smiled wide, loving that he knew me too well.
We stood in the hot water, making mud on the floor of the shower, and held each other.
Maybe we weren’t exactly friends.
Maybe we weren’t exactly lovers.
But no matter what, we were a team.
A family.
Epilogue
The house in Germany had been something of a headquarters for us, but we had to assume the Burrow was fully aware of it, we packed our bags and headed for a house no one knew about. It was a place in England none of us had been to. Jack’s family didn't own it; Servario did, but he had never been there either. He bought it sight unseen.
Coop stayed behind in the US for a few weeks to tie up loose ends and see the commander about our mission.
We arrived at the mansion in the English countryside with no plans beyond letting Jack have a go at the bots and the codes, which meant I got a few weeks to be a mom. It was summer break so I didn't have to explain to my kids why we were away from home. Not that I needed to lately. They had begun to notice a pattern in their lives. Homeschooling with Fitz to catch up, traveling the world but never sightseeing, and the grown-ups sounded like the biggest bunch of conspiracy freaks ever to grace the earth.
I couldn't be angry about the life they were living. The point was that they were living. We all were.
I couldn't ask for anything else, not yet.
The End
Volume Four
The End of Lies
Prologue
September 2013
The explosion still rang in my head, even when the news had moved on to stories of the crashing markets and the hundreds of vastly important people who had died, casualties that would affect the economy. How would we recover as a world from such losses?
They didn't mention the one name that should’ve been on the list of dead.
A name they wouldn't know.
A name I would never forget.
The rest of the people who had died in the explosion could all burn.
I didn't care.
I was stuck on the one name they failed to say, reliving fractions of memories melding together to create a story, possibly one that hadn’t happened.
Every single image flashed behind my eyes, reminiscences I wasn't sure were accurate. I couldn't trust my brain.
Reliving an entire lifetime, which in reality was only months long, was excruciating. My mind found ways to twist and turn the tiniest of seconds, the quickest of looks, the softest of whispers. It found a way to make him more than he was.
I’d nearly sainted him in his death.
One thing was certain though, he haunted me.
He’d found a way to stay behind, no doubt dodging his date with destiny and the hellfire he’d totally earned.
I’d seen him multiple times, passing a doorway or staring from a window. But like the ghostly vision he was, he vanished by the time I got there.
A teary smile cracked across my face at the thought of him running hell, because of course that was the only way he would endure the heat.
But no, he wasn't there.
He was here.
Haunting me.
Dead and not.
Dead.
Thinking that word felt wrong.
How could something so strong and colossal die?
But he had.
He had died by our hand.
Our bomb.
Our plan.
There was no recovering from this.
The ice in my veins no longer chilled me. The cold was a welcome reprieve to the fiery pain I’d endured.
Two losses in one day, one second, one breath.
There was no recovering from this.
1
Cold hard truths
May 2013
“Ralph!” Jules shouted gleefully. Her footsteps echoed slapping sounds across the huge courtyard of the manor as she rushed to the cat.
Servario’s manor home was so
large I’d lost my children in it three times in the weeks we’d stayed here.
“Uncle Fitz! You got him!” Jules grabbed the cat carrier from Fitz and placed it down roughly, something Ralph would not likely thank her for. She pulled the fluffy animal from the carrier and held him tight. It was the struggle snuggle of his life.
The cat obliged but gave me the warning look; undoubtedly we were counting down to the moment the fur flew and the child cried.
“Okay, let me see him.” I hurried over, taking my chubby cat in my arms and sniffing his fur. “I’ve missed you,” I whispered to him.
“Did you bring Penny too?” Jules asked Fitz about the horse he’d given her.
“No, honey. I couldn't fit her on the plane. But I did make sure she was doing well at the boarding stables. She sends her regards and wishes she were on this journey with us.” Fitz grinned at her but his eyes darted to me, telling me something wasn't right. Something that would need to be discussed privately.
“Why don't you take Ralph in and show him where the food is going to be and set up his litter box?” I handed him to Jules.
“Why do I hafta do it?”
“Because pets are a responsibility, missy. Move it!” I folded my arms and gave the mom look. The one where I arched one eyebrow more than the other and side-glanced silent threats.
“Fine. But this isn’t fair. Mitch never has to do anything.” She stomped off.
“Life’s hard.” I rolled my eyes and headed in the opposite direction, past Fitz, forcing him to turn and walk with me.
“Yes, I can’t imagine being a little kid living with three maids, a groundskeeper, and a butler.” He chuckled.
“I don't know how we will ever go back to normal,” I lamented.
“Evie, I hate to be the one to tell you this, but there is no normal, kid.”
“I’m starting to see that.” I hugged myself tighter. “What was the other thing? The look?”
“Well, our house in Canada has been ransacked. They’re clearly searching for us.”
“God, even Canada isn’t safe?”
“Apparently not. Though the good thing is we’re still undetected in England. No one seems to know we’re here.” Fitz shrugged, satisfied with that.
“Do you think it’s Saransk, and he’s figured out it was me who took down his daughter?” The thought made me want to panic but until we had proof, there was no point.
“I don't know. It’s possible, there could’ve been cameras we didn't find or ways of figuring out it was you who took down the brothel. A mole perhaps.”
“But that’s why we do everything so under the radar. The brothel sting was serious need to know, so any moles wouldn't be able to alert Saransk.”
“Which means we need to get rid of him. ASAP. If it is him, he’s better connected than we were prepared for.” Fitz sounded tired. “I checked in with Coop. He’s busy making it appear as though he’s working a completely different case, trying to lead any moles watching us away. So we might be able to fly under the radar long enough to finish this and end the target on our backs.”
“That’s hopeful.” I didn't want to believe it, but there really was no other option. The choices were: stress out until I couldn't even function, or live with the hand we’d been dealt and hope hiding here at Servario’s mystery mansion was enough. Neither was amazing but it could’ve been worse.
It could always be worse.
If Saransk found out who I was or found my children, it would be much worse.
“I’m going to lie down. Tell your mother I’m back, please.” Fitz leaned in and kissed my cheek, leaving the lingering scent of his aftershave in the soft breeze.
“Will do.” I watched him amble away, wondering how hard it was, being a hidden asset all these years. Fitz, Mom, and Dad had been in the game a lifetime now. I wondered about the cost on the soul and happiness. They did seem rather tired.
Not having the time to ponder that, I turned and went back to the office where Jack currently lived.
Opening the door to the dark room made me cringe.
It was every mother’s worst nightmare.
Weird smells.
Dank odors.
Lack of air circulation.
Sort of like dust, stinky unwashed feet, and a combination of foods at different stages of decay blending to make the smell all teenagers seemed to thrive in. Particularly boys.
Jack’s bloodshot eyes didn't lift from the computer screens, but he nodded his head, acknowledging my arrival. “Evie.”
He was typing faster than I ever thought possible, his gaze flickering between three massive screens.
On the other side of the room, facing him, was a wall of small TVs all flashing images from facial recognition software linked to different CCTV networks he’d connected to. Next to them were three smaller TVs monitoring Coop, our other new job. We watched his back and the activity around him. Everywhere Coop went, facial recognition caught him on camera and patched the information to these TVs. It was like being there for him but not. If it was an emergency, we could get in contact with him. Otherwise, our orders were to wait here for Jack to crack the code on the bots while we came up with a plan for the destruction of the Burrow and the Organization.
Luce glanced up at me, her eyes bloodshot as well. “Oh thank God. My turn to go outside?” She struggled to get out of her chair.
She stood tall, stretching and moaning, her shirt lifting a little to reveal some of her abs. Jack’s eyes and typing paused as he focused on her for a moment, one she didn't notice. His eyes stayed on her stomach, his brow knit, and he gulped. It took a moment before he went back to the rapid typing, but his gaze didn't lock on the computers again. It flickered from them to her.
She was oblivious. Her stare met mine and she grinned. “I’m going for a swim.”
“Tell Mom Fitz is back, please. And take Mitch with you. He needs fresh air. Servario had every new gaming system delivered days ago, and I don't think he’s left the room since.”
“Reminds me of someone else.” Luce eyed Jack whose cheeks flushed in the bright light of the computer screens.
“This is actually my job. It’s not like I’m playing the early release of The Last of Us.” He sounded bitter.
“That’s what Mitch is playing. He can't believe Mom's mystery friend got it a month early for him.”
“Of course he can’t,” Jack seethed.
“Anyway. I’ll be back in a few hours to relieve you.” Luce left the room, closing the door softly.
“Still nothing?” I asked Jack quietly, not wanting Luce to hear.
“She hates me. I don't know how to fix this.”
“Yeah, me either. I’ll keep thinking on it.” I nestled into the warm chair Luce had left me. My eyes narrowed in on Coop sitting at a desk typing, much like Jack was. “Anything exciting happen?” I asked him about Coop.
“Nope. He’s got to be bored. Weeks of updating criminal and political profiles in the database would probably kill me.” His voice trailed off as if he was detached from his thought process. “But I think he needed a couple of weeks away.”
The comment stung just enough to end the conversation, though I wasn't certain that was what Jack intended. He wasn't cruel, he was indifferent, which could also be painful to anyone on the receiving end. I turned back to Coop and started to watch his six.
On the screen he scowled, maybe concentrating, but then his lips lifted into a grin.
Seeing him on a screen was akin to watching a TV show. He was beautiful enough to be an actor.
“He looks good. Happier,” I noted quietly, maybe to myself. It was a vast improvement compared to when his sister died. He was a wreck just weeks ago.
“Yeah, he seems almost back to normal. Been posting jokes to our safe profiles for days. Lighthearted ones too. It’s weird but I’m relieved. I was sure her death would be the end of his sanity.”
“How long is he staying there?” I’d assumed he would be back by now.
“Not sure. He keeps delaying. It was two weeks, then three. Now it’s been a month and he’s delayed again.”
We missed him but watching Coop’s eyes sparkle again as they lifted from the screen, focusing on something out of the camera’s viewpoint, was worth his not being here.
“If our house in Canada was ransacked, what are the odds that it’s Saransk who knows who I am and is hunting for me?” I asked offhandedly.
“Fair to good. There’s always a chance in everything.”
“I need to take out Saransk, sooner than later. We need to start preparing for that.”
“I’ll add it to the list of shit I’m trying to accomplish this week,” he said dryly.
“Smart ass.” I lifted a middle finger into the air and focused on Coop’s smile, noting it had shifted, softening as he stared into the distance. I was just about to change the angle when a female walked into view. She had on black tight-fitting dress pants, ugly square-shaped shoes, a pale blue blouse, and her shiny blonde hair was spun up in a struggle bun. She glimpsed back and smiled at someone behind her.
“Who’s that?”
“Oh her,” Jack sounded disinterested, but he lifted his eyes and watched her as intently as I did. "She's new."
The girl—literally a girl—was stunning even if she tried to be plain.
She couldn't have been more than twenty-five. She was slender and shiny in a bright-eyed way that suggested teenaged innocence and naivety. Like how the Sweet Valley High twins always appeared on the covers of their books. Books I’d read before Coop was in school.
The girl smiled wider and waved at the someone behind her we couldn't see in the cameras, and then focused back to Coop, pointing a thumb over her shoulder. She was inviting him to do something. She was trying to be casual, but from the way her hand trembled just slightly and her stomach tightened enough to be caught by the camera, it was obvious what was happening here. She liked him. He made her uncomfortable in an exciting way.
He tilted his head, contemplating what she was offering, and there was no mistaking the look in his eyes or the way he smiled wide and free.