Ten Rules for Faking It

by Sophie Sullivan

  The door swung shut behind them as they walked to the counter. “No. You’re more Black Widow.” You could ask for lessons.

  Stacey’s eyes widened. “Yes. I think you’re right.”

  Everly stopped before they got to the counter, looking at Stacey expectantly.

  “What?”

  Everly rolled her hands. “Who am I?”

  “Oh.” Stacey gave her a once-over and put her hand to her chin. “Pepper Potts.”

  “What? She doesn’t kick anyone’s ass,” Everly said, louder than she’d meant to. There was absolutely no reason to be upset by a joke she’d started, but Pepper Potts?

  “She’s totally badass,” the woman at the counter said.

  Everly and Stacey looked her way, and heat suffused Everly’s skin. She didn’t mean to draw anyone else’s attention. Especially not for a ridiculous conversation.

  Stacey pulled her wallet out of her duffel bag and walked up to the counter. “Right? Pepper is the behind-the-scenes muscle. She’s got the freaky kind of power that makes people—well, Tony—do things and think they’re his own idea.”

  The young brunette, who looked like she lived at the gym, pointed at Stacey. “Yes. Exactly. She’s a quiet badass on top of being a physical one. She kicked some ass in the final movie.”

  That was true. When it dawned on her that they were really discussing this with a stranger, she was a little embarrassed, but oddly pleased with the comparison. She pulled out her own wallet.

  “Kickboxing, please,” she said after Stacey paid.

  “We’ve got a special starting. Ten classes for 25 percent off.”

  “That’s a good deal,” Stacey said, glancing at Everly.

  She rubbed her fingers along her bank card, the numbers softly scraping against her thumb.

  “No?” Stacey asked, stepping closer.

  Everly shrugged, the nerves from earlier returning. Take a leap. It’s time. Looking from Stacey to the brunette, she nodded. “Yes. Okay, yes. I’ll pay for ten, please.”

  Stacey raised her fist for Everly to bump it, but instead, Everly rolled her eyes at her friend.

  The class didn’t start for another ten minutes, and Chris’s friend wasn’t in the room when they got there, so Everly followed Stacey’s stretches, trying not to think about whether her boss would show. Since he’d given her that squishy cat two days ago, she hadn’t been able to get him out of her head. He’d already been in it, sort of. The back of her thoughts. Now, he was front and center. Which was why she’d started referring to him as boss in her head instead of Chris. Best to keep those lines firmly drawn. Work was her constant, and once this radio promotion was over, maybe it would go back to being her security blanket as well.

  A few more people filed in, bringing the group to nine, including Everly and Stacey. At least she’d come with someone so she wouldn’t be the ninth wheel in this case. The teacher’s partner. Rob hurried in with only a minute to go until the class started. He was already out of breath, and Everly wondered if he’d been teaching another class.

  “Helloooooo, cutie,” Stacey whispered.

  Everly frowned, looked from side to side to make sure no one heard. From the looks on the other women’s faces, and it was all women tonight, they agreed with her friend.

  “He’s totally out of breath. Maybe he shouldn’t be teaching,” Everly whispered back.

  “Sorry, ladies. A treadmill challenge was issued, and I had to prove who was the best before coming.”

  Some of the women laughed. One near the front, wearing very bright yellow spandex workout clothes, put a hand on her hip. “That’ll just make it easier for us to take you down.”

  Everly’s brows furrowed deeper when Rob winked at the woman. “You could try.”

  The rest of the room laughed, but Everly was too caught up in wondering how people could just throw themselves out there like that. She’d been embarrassed for having a silly conversation with her friend in front of someone. Every now and again, there were situations that knocked Everly upside the head with a reminder of how different she was from the general population. When it happened, she wanted to curl up inside of herself. Or burst free.

  Stacey nudged her hip with her own. “Hey, space cadet. Put your dukes up.”

  Her attention refocused in time to see Rob look their way, giving her a chin nod in recognition before his gaze locked on Stacey. His words trailed off, and his eyes widened marginally before he went back to what he was saying.

  Interesting. She glanced at Stacey, who seemed oblivious to the heated stare the instructor sent her way.

  “Okay. We’ll go through the basics, work on combining some of the moves, and then we’ll partner up. If everyone is okay with it, I’d like to do some work with the punching bags for the last twenty minutes. Sound good?”

  The other women agreed with a chorus of yeses, including Stacey. Everly sighed. Maybe she should just get a punching bag for home. That way, if it hit her back, there’d be no witnesses.

  As she went through the blocks and punches Rob modeled, coming around the room, critiquing their stances and follow-through, Everly fell into the motions. When she was trying to understand something, it was easier to turn down the white noise in her head. Having Stacey beside her helped, though she couldn’t settle entirely with the combined scents of perfume and sweat reminding her she was in a roomful of strangers. Really fit ones. Including Stacey, who moved through the motions like she’d been doing it since she could walk.

  “Have you done this before?” Rob asked, hands on his hips. He wore a black tank top, soaked through with sweat, and stood too close for Everly to concentrate. She lost her balance and put her other foot down as Stacey nodded, swiping the back of her arm across her forehead.

  “I’ve been to a few classes. Here, actually, but with another teacher,” Stacey said.

  Rob’s eyes traveled along her body, and again, Stacey seemed unaware of the heat in them. So, you’re an expert at picking up on pheromones now? Because you’ve been on … what? Four and a half dates? Oh yeah, she was counting Daniel because they’d rescheduled and, technically, she’d shown up. Thank goodness for technicalities.

  Rob reached out to reposition Stacey’s arm, pausing to get permission before he actually touched her. Her respect for him increased immediately. He smiled at Everly.

  “You’re back and doing well. You need to widen your stance a bit,” he said, showing her. She was relieved he didn’t reach out to reposition any part of her, while at the same time, curious about what Stacey thought of him. Her friend talked about her dates with an easy humor, but Everly had yet to meet any of the guys she went out with.

  “Thank you,” she said.

  “Everly, right?”

  She almost laughed. As perhaps the most awkward dater ever, even she could pick up on Rob’s attraction to her friend. Either Stacey was really not paying attention or she was playing it really freaking cool.

  She nodded. “This is my friend Stacey. Rob is a friend of Chris’s.”

  Rob held out a hand. “Deejay for the Sun. You’ve got a very recognizable voice,” he said, holding her hand a beat longer than needed.

  Stacey didn’t seem to mind. “Thank you. Have you worked here long?”

  He nodded. “Since inception. I own it.”

  Anything else he planned to say was cut short by a woman asking for guidance on how to follow through.

  Everly waited for Stacey to make some of the usual comments she made around cute guys, but her friend was suspiciously silent.

  She sidled up to Stacey and leaned toward her. “No running commentary about his butt or what his abs might look like?”

  Stacey feigned a punch at her and laughed, also leaning forward. “No, why? Do you want to see his butt and his abs?”

  Everly’s face flamed. “No!”

  Others looked at them, so she glared at Stacey but bit her tongue. It could have been Everly’s overactive imagination, but it felt like Rob spent consider
ably more time hovering around them than the rest of the women. He shot several looks their way, but Stacey maintained an unusual focus on her movements.

  By the time they went to the punching bags, Everly felt like she’d swallowed a pound of sand.

  “I need to refill my water,” she told Stacey, trying not to breathe like an obscene caller.

  “’Kay,” Stacey said, pulling her phone out.

  Waiting in the line at the fountain, Everly kept her gaze on her feet. Easier to avoid eye contact that way. Nice. Friendly as usual. She lifted her chin. You’re out. That matters. Focus on the good. The rules were actually helping her navigate her focus. Uh-huh, that’s why you spent last night tossing and turning, thinking about how Chris’s laugh made you enjoy Veronica Mars even more.

  “Your turn,” someone said behind her.

  Everly jolted and sent an apologetic look, moving forward in the line. Yeah. Really focused. Weaving her way through the gym, pleased that she felt a little more settled than the last two times she’d visited, she found her class already starting on the punching bags. They were in the far back corner of the gym in a matted area, not far from where people lifted weights. There were six bags, and five of the women had taken a position in front while Rob taught them how to steady the bag, how to hit it, and how to move around.

  “I’m not so sure about this part,” Everly whispered.

  Stacey grinned. “Why? This is the good part. You can take out all your aggressions on it.”

  Everly side-eyed her friend, lifting her brows. “Is that what you’ll be doing?”

  Rob called Stacey to the bag and used her as an example of how to step into a punch.

  “Everly?”

  She turned, her insides already cringing at the familiar voice. Simon stood staring at her with his mouth slightly open. Speaking of rules—there was a law in her universe that said she could only run into people she didn’t want to when she looked her worst. He, of course, wasn’t even sweating. Maybe he’d just arrived.

  “Simon.” Her voice came out smoother than she expected. She waited for her pulse to kick into high gear, but it remained the same as it was a few seconds ago.

  Stacey appeared at her side. “What are you doing here?”

  “Working out,” Simon said with a dismissive glance toward Stacey.

  “Weird. I thought you liked your workouts more horizontal with women who weren’t your girlfriend,” Stacey said, tilting her head like she was thinking it over.

  Everly’s gaze went cartoon-character wide, and she slapped a hand over her mouth, a giggle tickling her throat.

  Rob approached her other side. “Everything okay?”

  Simon scowled, saying to Rob. “Fine.” He turned to Everly, the sneer still present. “Can I talk to you for a second?”

  Hard pass. “No.”

  Stacey slid closer until her shoulders were brushing Everly’s. “You can get lost, though.”

  “I’m not talking to you,” Simon said, teeth gritted.

  “And it doesn’t sound like Everly wants to talk to you, so why don’t you go finish your workout and leave her alone?” Rob’s voice was calm and smooth, but it was clear the question was not a suggestion.

  “Five minutes,” Simon said.

  “Is that your personal best?” Stacey asked. She leaned into him, not even pretending to whisper.

  Everly lowered her chin to her chest and bit her cheek to keep from laughing. She should not be laughing. There was nothing funny about running into her ex after he’d recently bashed her on another station. The memory infused her with irritation.

  Simon started to speak, something unpleasant if the sneer on his face was any indication. Everly squared her shoulders, holding a hand up.

  “Stop. Honestly, he’s not worth the time.” He wasn’t. He wasn’t even worth the energy it would take to insult him.

  His gaze whipped to her, showing surprise. “Everly.”

  “Go away, Simon. Before one of us says something we shouldn’t.”

  “Or kicks you right in the—” Stacey started.

  Simon cut her off. “Screw you, Stacey. I know that contest was your idea. It has your stupidity all over it.”

  Rob’s chest puffed up, but he glanced at Everly, making her want to weep with appreciation that even though it was clear what he wanted to do, he paused long enough to let it be her choice.

  Giving him a surprisingly genuine-smile, she whispered, “Yes, please.”

  Rob’s next motions were like a choreographed dance. He stepped into Simon, raised one hand, snapped his fingers once, his other hand going to Simon’s shoulder as two huge, muscled men came out of seemingly nowhere and flanked him.

  “These gentlemen will escort you out of my gym. You’re no longer welcome here,” Rob said, his voice tightly controlled.

  Everly closed her eyes, realizing belatedly that they were making a spectacle and that others were staring. Her pulse picked up, and the sweat beading at the back of her neck was no longer from overexerting herself. You will not panic. You will not flee. Breathe. She tapped her fingertips against her thumb. Index, middle, ring, pinkie, repeat. Repeat. Repeat. Flickering in the base of her brain, though, was pride. She’d done it. She’d stood up to someone who didn’t deserve her time. She hadn’t been a bitch, which, in her opinion, was the easy road. She’d held her own and felt good about herself. If only people weren’t watching you.

  “Breathe,” Stacey whispered, pressing her hand to Everly’s back.

  “You know what? I’m going to go,” she said quietly. It was a good decision. Her decision so it didn’t make her a coward.

  “Don’t. Don’t let that ass chase you out of here,” Stacey said, her voice atypically harsh.

  “If you need a minute, you can go to my office,” Rob said in a much softer tone.

  “I don’t. I don’t need a minute,” she said. She needed a whole bunch of them, all to herself.

  The other women hovered around them, and a few of Rob’s staff checked in, glancing at her but speaking only to Rob.

  “Don’t go home,” Stacey said when Rob walked back to the class.

  “I don’t feel well,” Everly said, trying to rein in her fluttery breaths.

  “You’re fine.”

  God. Wouldn’t that be something if you actually felt that way? Fine? Instead, she felt overheated and nauseated.

  “It’s not like I won’t be back. I have nine more visits paid for.” She’d force herself to use them, but she’d had enough for tonight. “I’ll see you tomorrow.” The need to go clawed at her. Baby steps. She’d handled herself, she deserved some space. No one is looking at you. She walked toward the exit, refusing to keep her head down. Stacey stayed at her side, and when they exited the building, Everly gulped in the fresh air.

  “Why do you do this? Why do you let someone who doesn’t matter have so much control over you? Don’t you know how much better you are than he is?”

  Simon wasn’t controlling her—it’d be easier to fight if he were. Everly bent at the waist and put her hands to her knees. “This isn’t about him. I needed some air. Some space. Even Pepper Potts needed a damn minute after kicking ass. I kicked ass in there. Be proud of me, or at least don’t question me. I didn’t question you when you got all weird around Rob. So how about you let this go?”

  “What?” The one word rang out sharply, disrupting the quiet evening.

  Everly stood up, feelings tripping over each other. “You.” She pointed to the building. “In there. You’re the queen of flirting and sexual innuendos, but when he talked to you, you clammed up like I do at a staff party.”

  “You don’t attend staff parties,” Stacey said.

  Everly rolled her eyes. “Nice deflection.”

  “I was there to work out, not hit on one of Chris’s friends. I was there for you. Why is it the people who love you don’t get to have an impact on your actions or how you feel about yourself? You’ll let some creep you dated for five minutes chase y
ou out of a building but won’t take any of us at our word that you deserve better.”

  Everly’s jaw dropped, and blood rushed to her head. “I know I deserve better. I walked away from him. I know you don’t get how hard it was for me to do that just now, but it was. A public confrontation? I don’t do that. So excuse me if I need five fucking minutes after to decompress without people staring at me.”

  Tears burned her eyes as guilt kicked her in the lungs. Stacey always had her back even when she didn’t understand the whats and whys of Everly’s quirks.

  “I’m sorry. I’m sorry. That was uncalled for. Thank you for coming tonight. Finish the class. Please? So I don’t feel worse than I already do?”

  “Everly,” Stacey said, surprise and hurt etched into her features, woven into her tone.

  She felt the sigh Stacey held back.

  More than all the other things she hated feeling, Everly despised being a burden or a weight on her friend.

  “I’ll text you later.” But sometimes, there was nothing she could do about it. She couldn’t stand here and pretend she could let everything roll off her shoulders. When Stacey stepped back, her face a mask of disappointment, Everly’s heart muscles clenched. Maybe she didn’t deserve friendship. She dismissed the thought, angry at herself for wallowing. Go home. Get over it. Focus on the good. Why the hell was that so hard when there was so much of it?

  [24]

  Everly forced herself not to think of Simon or feeling awkward at the gym or to give in to the nagging urge to text Stacey that she was sorry. She’d tell her again in person, but there was no reason to interrupt any more of her evening. Instead, she kept herself busy by working on her Facebook posts and her own journal notes.

  It surprised her how much she enjoyed this piece of it. The idea of sharing without having to engage in back and forth conversation was freeing. She kept the posts short when she was reminding listeners which candidates were coming up and a little longer when describing the date. Tonight’s post was about rescheduling the last date and how it could be tricky, even for someone with a limited social calendar, to fit dating in. The other surprise was the comments on the posts.