The Heart of a Wolf

by Megan Smith

Musicians stood on the far side, fingers and bows whirling with motion as song after song floated out onto the air while dancers moved in traditional patterns both joyous and slow in turns. Children ran with giggling glee through the throng, stuffing sweets in their mouths and avoiding parental eyes as much as possible.

  The mating celebration for the Ascendant Alpha had finally arrived.

  News of Kendrick’s marriage had spread like wildfire among the packs and when the announcement had gone out for the celebration, more acceptances than anticipated had come back. Guests had started arriving the week before, setting up camps in the woods when there was no more room in the Kalvara homes.

  Werewolves being fiercely territorial and at times very fractious, the gathering could have been a recipe for disaster given several of the packs were currently warring with each other, but they were all obeying an unspoken rule that mating celebrations were not to be disrupted. So, while they weren’t exactly friendly, each group was being coolly cordial-and keeping to opposite sides of the clearing at all times.

  A festive aura had descended on the mountainous valley as others poured in, including every Blackstar Guardian around the globe who could make it. Cadrian had strode up to the den the evening before, causing more than one werewolf to just stop and stare at a man who seemed more legend than anything else. Allandra had just smiled, knowing the man she thought of as a father was used to such treatment.

  Kendrick had been surprisingly subdued during the quiet talks that had taken place in front of the den’s meeting area before the fire and had later confessed that his wolf had immediately recognized Cadrian as having a higher dominance than he did. A first for the Ascendant Alpha and one that left him feeling unsettled.

  But, the Alkirian Star’s promise of open acceptance, as well as several suggestions for ways to increase their visibility safely, had made those walking away from the meeting feel small kernels of hope sprout that their future might, indeed, be brighter. Combined with the news that had arrived a few days before that the dragons were open to talks about becoming allies and Allandra’s secret discussions with Prince Rafael, the mood in the packs was growing considerably lighter than it had been just a few weeks before.

  Allandra couldn’t wipe the happy smile off her face as she moved gracefully in a couples dance pattern with Kendrick, looking impossibly handsome in a navy blue tunic and hose, his boots shined to a glossy finish for the event. She’d chosen to match him in a dark blue gown with a gold belt that twisted around her waist to end in a low v in front and long bell sleeves that fluttered as she moved.

  Together they made a striking pair and, as they moved in time to the music, hands touching briefly as they circled each other, benevolent smiles were bestowed on them from those watching on the sidelines.

  You are radiant tonight.

  Touching her gaze to his as she flowed gracefully to the side as his warm voice filled her head, she sent her own admiring look his way.

  Happiness will do that.

  Taking her hand to lead her three steps forward and the around him again, he swept the area while noting everyone who was there and what was happening. So far things had been progressing remarkably smoothly and it made his wolf happy to have so many of its brethren close by.

  The addition of the Guardians to what had previously been a zealously guarded private event for the wolves had caused a much smaller stir than he had anticipated. Instead of being wary and uncomfortable with strangers in their midst, many regarded the newcomers as a sign of things to come. Known to be unquestionably trustworthy, having them here as the first outsiders welcome at a celebration had proven to be a good test for someday allowing trusted others in as well.

  Instead of dampening the mood as he’d feared, they had done just the opposite. Having other races here made his wolves feel...valued. Pack territory and especially celebrations like this would always be tightly controlled so they remained secure places to intermingle and express joy, but now the possibility had opened up for them to make friends with other races and include them in important moments of their lives.

  There were suddenly small cracks in the necessary isolation they’d been forced to live in and a tremulous hope was filling those spaces as their wolf-born children’s laughter echoed through the valley.

  The song ended with a lingering, happy note and Kendrick wrapped his arm around Allandra’s waist, tugging her close to nuzzle the side of her brow. The next song began with soft sweet notes and a slower pace. Those around them moved in another familiar pattern but the two of them remained still, swaying gently.

  Tilting her head up, she studied his face with adoration in her hazel eyes, her heart achingly full. After so many lonely years, for both of them to be here now enjoying a wedding celebration and looking forward to a future that held increasingly optimistic possibilities sent an incandescent joy tumbling through her veins.

  Tipping up on her toes, she pressed a soft kiss on his lips, making his arms tighten around her as his eyes darkened with warm promise.

  “If you meant for this to be a private celebration, you shouldn’t have invited us all here.”

  A teasing voice cut into the intimate moment and Allandra cast a look side-ways at the handsome dark-haired man with amused hazel eyes and a lazy smile and let one of her eyebrows wing up.

  “Did I invite you? I don’t remember you being on the list.”

  “What?” he responded, putting one hand over his heart, “you’d have a wedding without me? You told me I was your favorite.”

  “I say that to everyone” she responded with a shrug of her shoulders and a telling twitch of her lips before she threw her arms around him with a happy laugh. “I thought you wouldn’t be able to come!”

  Squeezing her back, he regarded her with open affection. “I wasn’t going to let some annoying Darkling keep me from being here. I just decided to stop toying with him and finish it quickly.”

  “The only way to deal with a Darkling is to finish them off quickly” Kendrick interrupted with dark certainty and Allandra drew back to introduce them with a happy smile.

  “Kendrick, I’d like you to meet Cadrian’s son, Darius. Darius...this is my Kendrick.”

  Reaching out for a firm handshake, the two men nodded cordially at each other. “We were all pleased to hear you were still alive,” Darius commented quietly, “It’s good to see the shadows gone from her eyes.”

  “Darius was my first trainer when I became a Guardian and has been the best brother and friend I could ever have,” she explained, “I don’t know how he did it but somehow he had the entire story of us out by the time my first training session was over. You have to be careful around him-Darius is terrifyingly intelligent and uses that against you. He notices everything.”

  Kendrick’s lips quirked up as the two men exchanged looks, recognizing similar traits in the other. “I’ll keep that in mind.”

  “I thought I’d steal you for a dance, if your mate doesn’t mind.”

  Brushing her long hair back over her shoulder, she accepted the hand Darius held out and tossed a fleeting smile over one shoulder at Kendrick before they moved smoothly into the next pattern.

  “You look happy” he observed and she nodded, not making any attempt to dampen the joy shining in her eyes.

  “I am. Ecstatically.”

  “I’m glad. You deserve every happiness” he assured her, glancing across the clearing to where Kendrick was talking with several visiting Alphas, “Your husband seems to have a very virulent dislike of Darklings.”

  Pressing her palm against his as they moved in a circle, she nodded as her eyes grew solemn. “His father is a Darkling. He was the one who bought Kendrick to use in the Hunts.”

  Darius winced. “Ouch.”

  “I’ll never understand how a father could do that to his own son. To deliberately send your own child into an arena knowing they could be killed-just to provide entertainment. It’s barbaric” she ground out angrily.

  “Unfortu
nately, that’s the Night Realm,” Darius reminded her.

  She gave a short, dismissive shake of her head. Logically, she knew that things were different there, but not everyone from the Night Realm was vicious and uncaring. She knew many people who loved and protected their children with everything they had. She even knew a few Darklings who weren’t completely given over to darkness. Everyone made choices about who they were and what they were willing to do. Darius was himself a Dark Born-the biological child of a Darkling-though he’d been adopted by Cadrian when he was five so no one thought of him as anything but the son of the Alkirian Star.

  Darklings, unfortunately, often chose to follow in their evil Dark One parents’ steps and viewed their own children as expendable tools to be used for their own purposes. Watching Darkling after Darkling toss their child into the Hunts for entertainment and profit had given Kendrick a steadfast hatred for them all.

  “Have you ever met your birth father?” she asked curiously, tilting her head to the side and he shook his head.

  “No,” he answered simply, “beyond a passing wonder about who he might be when I was fourteen...I’ve never had a need to. Cadrian is and always will be my father.”

  They bowed to each other as they song ended and, as they straightened, Darius flicked a glance over toward where Cadrian was nursing a drink and laughing with Reed and Winter, two Aesirs and fellow Guardians.

  “You should talk to Father about becoming a werewolf. I doubt there’d be a problem, but there could be some complications” he suggested and she blinked at him in surprise.

  “Becoming a werewolf?” she repeated dumbly and he flicked one dark eyebrow up in response.

  “You can’t tell me it hasn’t been on your mind since the first moment you were married?”

  “Well...I...”

  “On that note, I think I’ll head over and see what you have set out to eat. I’m famished” he announced and walked away, chuckling.

  Allandra stood still, dancers stepping rhythmically around her, as Darius’ suggestion sent her thoughts swirling. Yes, the possibility of physically joining the werewolves had occurred to her but the midst of everything that had been happening, she’d set it aside as something to consider later.

  She didn’t think it affected how the packs viewed her-they seemed to accept her as one of them just as she was-but it did make her wonder how it would change her feelings if she truly became one of them.

  Suddenly realizing that people were giving her strange looks, she moved away from the dancers and slowly wound her way to Cadrian, who handed her a tankard while not looking at all surprised that she’d ended up at his side. Nodding to Winter and Reed, who congratulated her on the marriage while commiserating on all the new responsibilities she suddenly had, she chatted lightly while waiting for a chance to speak to Cadrian privately.

  A few moments later, her chance came when the two men headed across the clearing to ask a pair of pretty werewolves who had been eyeing them flirtatiously, to dance.

  “There shouldn’t be any conflict,” Cadrian announced before she even had a chance to gather the breath to ask the questions burning inside. She shot him a chiding look which he returned with a bland one.

  “The vows I made when I became a Guardian...what about the changes that were made to my body-won’t becoming a werewolf affect that?” she questioned and he shrugged, his changeable eyes reassuring as he looked at her.

  “Nothing will ever alter the vows you took. If you’re concerned about having your allegiances challenged, I wouldn’t worry. We are not in opposition to the Packs and I think you’ll find in time that things will meld better than you’d hoped. There might be times where you will need to choose the Guardians if there is a conflict, because you have made those vows, but I do my best to see that it’s a rare occurrence. The Creators know you Allandra,” he reminded her quietly, “they wouldn’t have put you on this path without a reason and without knowing that it would bring you great contentment.”

  Tears stung her eyes at his words and she nodded, comforted more than she could say. She had wondered more than a time or two if they knew what a tangle they’d created when they’d paired a Blackstar Guardian with the Ascendant Alpha.

  “As for the physical aspects. The body is adaptable and you already have many of the enhanced senses that the werewolves enjoy. Becoming one of them will take some adjusting but will most likely be fairly easy for you because of the way your body has already been changed,” he paused to take a drink before continuing, “the real question, is...do you want to make the change? I don’t think anyone expects it of you or would be disappointed even if you chose to remain as you are. Kendrick quite obviously adores you and wouldn’t change a single thing about you. So, it’s not ‘do you need to be changed’ but do you ‘want’ to?”

  Silence fell between them as Allandra considered what he’d said and ran through the questions in her head, trying to find the answers there.

  Sipping her drink, she watched the firelight flicker merrily on the faces of those enjoying the celebration-laughing, talking and eating their way through the food tables as fast as they could be re-filled and swept the area with a considering gaze.

  Brogan stood with one arm protectively wrapped around Abbie’s waist as she chatted with the wife of a visiting alpha. Declan and Cason were dancing with a pair of sisters from the far away Clear River Pack while Garin was holding an archery contest amongst a rowdy group that sent up cheers or groans at regular intervals. Nera, surprisingly, was sharing a meal with a Maethyrian Guardian named Darien while both Lachlan and Lyssia were both mingling easily in the crowd.

  Edmond and Charity were staying at the fringes of the crowd, still a little skittish but already showing improvements in their behaviors. Seated beside them at the table were Fredrick and Judith, who had surprisingly made the transition with an uncommon level of control. All four were content to live in Kalvara and were quickly making a place for themselves among the Pack.

  A quick search found Teagan and Brylee in the midst of a group of hysterically laughing children-a mix of werewolves and offspring of Guardians-as they played a game by the edge of the water and watched over by the benevolent, watchful gazes of several adults.

  Aiden and Meadow, having already formed ties with several members of both the Kalvara and Naelonia packs, were laughing and talking with newfound friends as they lounged at the tables while sharing platters of food.

  This was Pack. This was family.

  Her marriage with Kendrick had widened what that meant and brought new friendships and the beginnings of strong ties. She had already belonged to the Guardians when she first came to Kalvara but now she felt the pull of the packs as well. Nothing could sever the bonds binding her with the Guardians, but taking the step to become a werewolf would bring an understanding of the race that could prove pivotal in her role as one of the Alpha pair.

  As soon as the thought floated across her mind, a calm settled on her soul as though it had just been patiently waiting for her to come to a decision it had already made. Letting out a slow breath, she looked up at Cadrian to find him watching her gravely.

  Giving her a small smile, he slipped an arm around her shoulder and gently kissed the side of her head. “You should bring Kendrick and the children to Maerwyth soon. Perhaps in a few months after things have settled” he suggested before looking across the clearing and sighing softly, “I’d better see what trouble Alexander and Hawk are conspiring. Those two are going to be the death of me” he muttered before striding off.

  Biting her lip on a smile at the familiar affectionate exasperation in his voice, she sighed happily when she felt Kendrick’s arms wrap around her from behind. Tilting her head back, she let the glow of her smile widen and shine out of her eyes as she peered up at a man who made her heart pound and her soul soar.

  “Tonight has been perfect.”

  The glowing green shards in his eyes flared brightly as he bent to kiss the nape of her neck, both wolf
and man looking content while sweeping a glance over the crowd.

  “Celebrations are always a gift. Every time a pair of Seraphins find each other, a child is born or a werewolf reaches a milestone birthday...it’s a miracle. We’re growing stronger every day and someday...we’re going to thrive.”

  Nodding in agreement, she settled back in his arms and let the moon wheel overhead as joy filled Kalvara.

  Chapter 15

  A BIRD TWITTERED OUTSIDE, perched precariously on a tiny branch as it peered in the room. Strands of sunlight beamed in through the open window, warming the space as a fresh breeze gently rustled the bedcurtains.

  Kendrick sat on the bed, a deathly still Allandra cradled in his arms. He’d been sitting there for four days, stubbornly refusing to move or leave the room for any reason since his wife had essentially died after he’d sent the swirling green essence of his Blaedin into her.

  He knew that when a Guardian received severe enough wounds, their bodies shut down completely, essentially ‘dying’ as it worked to repair the damage but it had still caused his heart to stutter in panic and his wolf to grow frantic when he’d watched it happen to her. He had gathered her carefully into his arms, every breath hard and labored while smoothing a gentle hand over her hair.

  She hadn’t moved since. Her chest hadn’t moved with even a single breath, her skin was frighteningly cool and not even his wolf senses could find a pulse or sign of life anywhere.

  Visitors had stopped by, usually during mealtimes when Alaine would bring up a tray and study Allandra with a concerned sweep before quietly going back out. The Sentinels had trooped in every day to sprawl about the room and give an update on how things were progressing and both Lachlan and Lyssia had swung by to give her a quick check up.

  Teagan and Brylee had spent hours curled up on the bed, their bodies pressed close to their mother in an attempt to give comfort and strength-as well as receive it. Both of them having seen other’s unconscious as their bodies adjusted to the change, they weren’t as disturbed by her deathly stillness as they might have been otherwise. Still, he could tell that both were anxious for her to wake.