Amish Beginnings

by Vannetta Chapman

  Was that why she’d fallen hard for Alvin Lee when he asked her to ride in his buggy the first time? He’d come to Paradise Springs about five years ago, so he hadn’t known her as a kind. She’d been flattered by his attention, but when he raced his buggy she knew she should tell him she wanted no part of such sport. Instead she’d remained silent, telling herself she didn’t want to look like a coward. The truth was she hadn’t wanted to lose the one boy who might be able to look past her tomboy past.

  She’d learned her lesson. It’d be better to remain a maedel the rest of her life than to offer her heart to someone who didn’t want it. If she could find someone who could love her as she was...

  Nathaniel’s face filled her mind, but she pushed it away. He was risking everything on making his family’s farm prosperous once again. Though she admired his dream, as she’d discovered with Alvin Lee, when a man focused obsessively on a goal—whether it was a successful farm or the best racing buggy in the county—everything and everyone else was dispensable.

  She wouldn’t let herself be cast off like the junk in Titus Fisher’s house. Not ever again.

  * * *

  Nathaniel walked back from helping Jacob and the other boys set up a temporary ball field behind the barn. He saw Esther sitting alone at the picnic table. During the meal, she and Wanda had been asked question after question about the upcoming wedding. Esther had answered many of them, giving her mamm a slight respite.

  Now she was alone.

  He sat on the other end of the bench. It shifted beneath him, and her eyes popped open. She looked at him in surprise, and he wondered how far away her thoughts had been.

  “Hiding?” he asked with a grin.

  “In plain sight?” She half turned on the bench to face him, her elbow resting on the table. “Just thinking. Mostly about the things we need to get done before the wedding.”

  “Nobody seemed surprised by the announcement.”

  She chuckled. “It’s hardly unexpected. I’m happy it’s finally coming to pass.”

  “Gut things come to those who wait.”

  “I can’t believe that’s coming out of your mouth! You never were willing to wait for anything.”

  “Look who’s talking!” He grinned. “Esther the Pester never waited for anything, either.”

  “Oh!” she gasped, her blue eyes widening. “I’d forgotten that horrible name! Don’t mention it in front of Micah and Daniel. They’ll start using it again.”

  With an easy grin, he said, “I won’t, but it’s not such a bad nickname.”

  “It is when you’re trying to keep up with three older boys who sometimes didn’t want you around.”

  “Not true.” His voice deepened, and his smile faded. “I liked having you around, Esther. When I went to Indiana, you were what I missed most. Not my home, not my grandparents, not the twins. You.”

  “I missed you, too.” Her gaze shifted, and he wondered what she was trying to hide. “You’re here now, and you’re helping Jacob. I saw him playing with the other kinder.”

  “I may have let him assume the alpacas might get along with him better if he could get along with his schoolmates.”

  “You didn’t!” She laughed, the disquiet fading from her eyes. “Whatever he assumed, it’s gut to see him acting like a normal kind.”

  Nathaniel grimaced. “Wouldn’t a normal kind be curious about how his onkel is doing? It’s been more than two weeks since Titus was taken to the hospital, and Jacob has barely expressed interest in going there. He speaks fondly of his onkel, so I’m surprised he doesn’t want to see him.”

  “Don’t forget Jacob was in the hospital for almost a month in the wake of the accident.”

  “I hadn’t considered that.”

  “I don’t know any way you could use his determination to have the alpacas accept him ease that problem.”

  He smiled, then said, “Speaking of the alpacas, what can you tell me about shearing them?”

  “Only what I’ve read and observed. I’ve got a book at home that explains how an alpaca is sheared.” She gave him a wry grin and folded her fingers on her lap. “Not that I ever attempted it myself. I took mine to a neighbor’s farm when their sheep were sheared, and the men handled it when they were done with the flock. I let them keep the wool in exchange for their work. They seemed to think it was a fair exchange.”

  “How long did it take them to shear your alpacas?”

  “Not long. Maybe ten minutes each or less.”

  “So quickly?” His hopes that the alpacas’ wool might be the way to fund the farm until the harvest deflated. “I guess the wool isn’t worth much.”

  “I didn’t have enough to make it worthwhile to try to sell it on my own. With your herd of alpacas, you should be able to do well. This past spring, the best wool was selling for over twenty dollars a pound. The next quality level down sells for around fifteen dollars a pound.”

  He stared at her in amazement. “How do you know that?”

  “I’d been thinking of getting a small herd of my own. Ezra has pastures I can use. I’d started collecting information about income and expenses, but I had to set it aside to begin the school year.”

  “You’ve never said anything about that.”

  “You never asked.” She grinned the slow, slightly mischievous smile that always made his heart beat quickly.

  “True.” He tapped his chin with his forefinger. “I never guessed their wool would be so valuable.”

  “Alpaca’s wool doesn’t contain lanolin, so people who are allergic to sheep’s wool can wear it. The cleaner the wool, the better price you can get for it.”

  “How do I keep it clean?”

  “Some people put thin blankets over their alpacas to keep the wool as clean as possible.”

  “Like a horse’s blanket?” He tried to imagine buckling a blanket around a skittish alpaca.

  “Ja, but smaller and lighter. The covers have to be adjusted as the wool grows, so the fibers stay straight and strong.”

  “I should have guessed a teacher would have done her reading on this.”

  She raised her hands and shrugged. With a laugh, she rested her elbow on the table again. That left her fingers only inches from him. If he put his hand over hers, how would she react?

  Stop it! he ordered himself. How many more ways can she make it clear she wants to be friends and nothing more?

  “Looking up things in books is as natural to me as breathing,” she said, drawing his attention from her slender fingers to her words. “I saw a bunch of books behind the chairs at your house. Could any of them help you?”

  “I never noticed them until the chairs were moved, but I didn’t find anything about alpacas.”

  “You’re welcome to borrow the few I’ve collected.”

  “Danki. I—”

  “Nathaniel! Esther! Komm!” called one of the Huyard boys. He, his younger brother and Jacob raced toward them, their faces alight with excitement.

  The boy who’d shouted grabbed Esther’s hand, and Jacob and the other boy seized Nathaniel’s. Pleading with them to join in the softball game because the kinder needed more players, they tugged on the two adults.

  She laughed and said, “You want us to play so you can strike me out again, Clarence.”

  The older boy grinned. “We’ll take it easy on you.”

  “No, we won’t,” asserted his younger brother. “That wouldn’t be fair, and we have to be fair. That’s what you always say, Esther.”

  “Ja, I do. Milo is very, very serious about playing ball,” Esther said with another chuckle as she stood. “Do you want to play, too, Nathaniel?” She held out her hand to him.

  For a second, he was transported to the days when the Stoltzfus kinder had been his playmates. How many times had Esther stood as she was now, her hand stretched out to him as she as
ked him to take part in a game or an exploration in the woods or an adventure born from her imagination?

  “Of course,” he said as he would have then, but now it was because he wanted to see the excitement remain in her scintillating eyes.

  When the two boys grabbed his hands again and pulled him to his feet, he walked with them and Esther to where other kinder were choosing teams. Soon the game began with Esther pitching for one side and he for the other. Nobody bothered to keep score as laughter and cheers filled the afternoon air.

  One of the girls on his team hit a ball long enough for a home run. When she ran around the bases and to home plate, he held up his hand to give her a high five. Instead she threw her arms around him and hugged him in her excitement.

  “This is the best day ever!” she shouted.

  “Ja,” he replied, looking at where Esther was bouncing the ball and getting ready for the next batter. Her smile was warm as she urged her team not to get discouraged. When her gaze focused again on home plate, his eyes caught it and held it. Her expression grew softer as if it were especially for him. More to himself than the girl, he repeated, “Ja. It’s a gut day. The very best day ever.”

  Chapter Ten

  Esther had planned to go home from the Huyards’ with Mamm, but stayed for the evening’s singing when Mamm insisted she wanted some time to talk with Ezra and Leah about the wedding alone. They were waiting at the house.

  “You’ll be able to get a ride home with someone else,” Mamm said, her eyes twinkling. “The Huyards have invited Jacob to stay with them and their kinder tonight, so Nathaniel doesn’t have to bring him to school in the morning. Jacob is excited, and Nathaniel can have an evening without worrying about the boy. See how well that’s working out?”

  “Ja.” She didn’t add anything else. Telling Mamm to stop her matchmaking would be rude. Her mamm wanted all her kinder to be happily married.

  She didn’t want to be matched with Nathaniel. Right? Why did she keep thinking about riding in his buggy without Jacob sitting between them? The quiet night with only the sound of buggy wheels and horseshoes to intrude, a blanket over their laps to ward off the cold...his arm around her. She could lean her head against his shoulder and listen to his voice echo in his chest as he spoke.

  She ejected those too-enticing thoughts from her mind. It’d be better if she just thought about the singing that had already started. From across the yard she could hear voices, which didn’t sing as slow as during the church service. Going to a singing was the perfect way to end a church Sunday. As the weather worsened with the coming of winter, many singings would be canceled so people could get home before dark.

  The barn doors were thrown wide open. Inside, propane lights set on long tables and on the floor sent bright light in every direction. A trio of tables to one side held snacks. Most of the singers had chosen a place on either side of the long tables. Couples who were walking out together sat across from each other so they could flirt during the songs.

  Esther paused outside the crescent of light by the doorway, not wanting to intrude on the song. She wrapped her arms around herself as the breeze blew a chill across her skin.

  “Are you going in or not?” asked Nathaniel as he stopped next to her.

  “I could ask you the same thing.”

  “Ja, you could. They don’t need me croaking like a dying frog in time with the music.” He rubbed his right shoulder and grinned. “I’m not sure I want to show off how throwing a ball the whole afternoon for the kinder has left my shoulder aching.”

  “Only half the afternoon,” she replied, wagging her finger. “The other half I was throwing the ball.”

  “You look as fresh as if you’d gotten a gut night’s sleep. Don’t rub it in.”

  She closed her eyes as the voices swelled out of the barn and surrounded them with “Amazing Grace.” It was one of her favorite songs.

  “You look pensive. Singings are supposed to be fun.” He leaned against the wall by the door.

  “Just listening,” she said quietly. “A joyous noise unto the Lord.”

  “The hundredth psalm.”

  She nodded. “One of my mamm’s favorite verses, and whenever she reads it aloud, I imagine a grand parade entering the Lord’s presence, everyone joyous and filled with music they couldn’t keep inside.”

  “I know what you mean.”

  He did. He almost always had understood her without long explanations. Not once had he tried to make her into something she wasn’t. When she looked at him, his face was half-lit by the lamps in the barn. His eyes burned through her, searing her with sweetness. He moved toward her.

  She held her breath. His face neared hers, and she closed her eyes. Had time slowed to a crawl? What other explanation was there for his lips taking so long to reach hers? Her hands began to move toward his shoulders when someone stepped out of the barn and called to her.

  Micah. If her brother discovered her about to kiss Nathaniel, she’d hear no end to the teasing.

  Her eyes popped open. Nathaniel wasn’t slanting toward her. Had she only imagined he intended to kiss her? Especially in such a public place with many witnesses? Perhaps she’d imagined his intentions in the attic, too.

  As the song came to an end, Micah called, “Why are you loitering out here? The more the merrier.” With a wave of his arm, he went inside.

  Nathaniel glanced into the barn as dozens of conversations began among the singers. “Shall we go in? You can sing, and I can croak.”

  He must not have noticed her silly anticipation of his kiss. Doing her best to laugh at his jest, she walked in with him. The singers rose to help themselves to the cider and lemonade waiting among the snacks. In the busy crowd, she was separated from Nathaniel.

  Esther thanked someone who handed her a cup of cider. She didn’t notice who it was as she looked for Nathaniel. Not seeing him, she let herself get drawn into a conversation with Neva, Celeste Barkman and Katie Kay Lapp, the bishop’s daughter. She realized Celeste and Katie Kay were peppering Neva with questions about Nathaniel.

  “I don’t know,” her assistant teacher said in a tone that suggested she’d repeated the same words over and over. “Ask Esther. She’s spent more time with Nathaniel and Jacob than I have.”

  The two young women whirled to Esther. She couldn’t miss the relief on Neva’s face. Katie Kay and Celeste were known as blabbermauls, and both of them fired a question at Esther. They exchanged a glance, then looked at her again...and both at the same time again.

  Esther tried not to smile at the exasperated look they shot each other. Before they could speak a third time, someone clapped his hands and called for everyone to take a seat.

  As the others rushed to the table, she drained the cup and put it beside others on a tray that would be returned to the kitchen later. She realized her mistake when she turned and saw Nathaniel at the far end with Katie Kay across from him and Celeste to his left. Katie Kay giggled as if what he’d said was the funniest thing she’d ever heard.

  I doubt he’s talking about alpacas with her. The ill-mannered thought burst through Esther’s mind before she could halt it. Why was she acting oddly? Friendship was all she’d told Nathaniel they should share. It was all she wanted. Right? Right! If she ever offered her heart again, the man would be stolid and settled with the quiet dignity her daed had possessed. Watching Katie Kay flirt with Nathaniel made Esther’s stomach cramp, as if she’d eaten too many green apples.

  She looked away and saw her brother Micah leaning against some bales of hay by the snack tables. His arms were crossed in front of his chest and his face was blank. Except for his eyes. They narrowed slightly when Katie Kay giggled again at something Nathaniel said.

  Esther had suspected for several months that her brother had a crush on the bishop’s daughter, though, as far as she knew, Micah had never asked Katie Kay if he could drive her home fro
m a singing. It wasn’t easy to think of her jovial, outgoing brother as shy, but he was around the tall blonde. That, as much as anything, told her how much he liked Katie Kay.

  Now the girl he liked was flirting openly with Nathaniel, his gut friend.

  Walking over to him, Esther said, “Micah, if—”

  “Everything is fine,” he retorted sharply. “I want to stand over here. Okay?”

  “Okay.” She wasn’t going to argue with him when she could see how distressed he was. “Do you mind if I stand here, too?”

  “Ja.”

  His answer surprised her, but she simply nodded before she took one of the last empty seats at the table. It was on the end of a bench with nobody sitting across from her. She smiled at the people sitting near her and joined in the singing as each new song was chosen. Her eyes swiveled from Nathaniel to Micah and back. Her brother was growing more dismayed, but Nathaniel was grinning as if he were having the best night of his life.

  When the last song was sung, the pitchers were empty and the last cookie was gone, the participants stood. Some, including Esther, carried empty plates and cups to the house. The men hooked their horses to their buggies and waited for the girls who’d agreed to ride home with them. Though nobody was supposed to take note of who rode with whom, Esther knew hers weren’t the only eyes noticing how Katie Kay claimed a spot in Nathaniel’s buggy before he gave the command to his horse to start. Certainly Celeste saw, because she pouted for a moment before setting her sights on someone else. Soon she was perched on a seat and heading down the farm lane toward the main road, as well.

  Esther stood by the barn door and watched the buggies roll away. Several of the men had mentioned how much their younger sisters and brothers had enjoyed playing ball with her, but not one asked if she needed a ride home.

  Even Nathaniel, it seemed. She’d thought—twice—he was about to kiss her, but now he drove away with another girl. Don’t blame him for your overactive imagination. She sighed, knowing her conscience was right.