Bitter Sweet Kisses

by S M Mala

  Something didn’t quite add up.

  ‘That’s great! Many thanks.’

  Jonah was talking to the workmen finishing his large studio at the end of the garden. People could come in and out, without going through the house. ‘If there are any problems, I’ll get back to you.’

  He walked into the bright space and smiled.

  It was perfect because he didn’t have to go far to work, and he could also lock himself away when he needed some space.

  Stretching out, he let out a loud yawn.

  He’d have to apologise to Sophie for molesting her.

  It was good, their lovemaking. He knew she was a little surprised by his actions, but was more than accommodating to his needs. And he wanted her so much, she wasn’t to know he intended to prove that he was the only man for her.

  Then his mind went straight back to what Harry said to him the day before.

  Jonah could only fathom he was still in shock by the surprise proposition.

  More than ever, he wanted out from Harry, but he was being held to ransom and that was the problem.

  It was also something he would never have thought the man would suggest.

  Then he remembered who it was.

  He could never play nicely, unless he knew he was going to win.

  Right now, Harry was about to beat everyone hands down.

  And there would be a high price to pay, especially for Jonah, if he even considered it.

  Then again, he might not have a choice if he wanted to keep Sophie happy.

  ‘This is nice.’

  Harry was grinning at her from the other side of the table.

  ‘No, it’s not,’ replied Sophie, glancing around the restaurant which they used to frequent when they were together. ‘I had to speak to you.’

  ‘You look lovely, you really do.’

  Her mouth dropped open at the comment as she couldn’t remember the last time he said something nice. Shaking her head, Sophie remembered not to get drawn into his bullshit.

  For three days Jonah was on edge and she wanted to know what Harry had done to him.

  ‘It’s about the adoption, isn’t it? You want to know why I haven’t signed the papers. I need to execute my rights.’

  ‘Execute?’ She tried not to choke on her tea. ‘You were all happy never to have anything to do with her, and now you want to execute rights?’

  ‘My parents have never seen her,’ he bluntly replied.

  ‘Have you told them? Remember, you removed all my things and dumped them on the street including Milly’s clothes. What sort of loving father is that?’ Cold blood was running through her veins when she looked at him. ‘So don’t bring your parents into it.’

  He smiled.

  It was unnerving.

  ‘I’ve always loved your fight under that shy exterior; it’s an incredible aphrodisiac, you know.’ Harry sipped his coffee. ‘I still love you.’

  ‘I don’t think you do.’

  ‘I do.’ He cleared his throat. ‘I don’t think Jonah is responsible enough for fatherhood.’

  ‘Pardon?’ She glared at Harry. ‘What gives you the right to say that?’

  ‘Wasn’t he there when she went missing?’

  ‘So was I.’

  ‘Were you two so loved up you forgot about her welfare?’

  ‘Don’t you dare say that to me!’ she hissed, leaning closer. ‘You wouldn’t know what she looked like in a room of two children. That’s how much you care about her welfare. He was there for me when I was pregnant; helped me give birth, and held her in his arms. When I look back, the highlights were having my baby and being with Jonah. Can’t you just let her be with a man who loves her unconditionally? Is that so hard to ask?’

  Harry sat back in his chair and stared. She watched how he tilted his head to take a closer look at her face.

  Sophie wasn’t going to turn away, so she glared back.

  ‘You told me you fell in love with Jonah as soon as you set eyes on him. Is that true?’ he asked, his tone softer, and a smile turning the corner of his mouth.

  ‘I thought it was odd and I was pregnant at the time. Harry, I never committed adultery. I would never have done that to you. No matter how dismissive you were about monogamy, I couldn’t betray that one thing in our marriage.’

  ‘But what about Jonah? Do you think he’ll be faithful to you? He’s a photographer, mixing with beautiful and exciting people. You can’t tell me you can satisfy all his needs, can you?’

  ‘And you’re implying what?’ Sophie frowned, knowing he was making her doubt Jonah but more importantly, herself.

  He used to do that before, soon after they were married.

  Question her choice of clothing; her decorating taste and even her shopping.

  It was never quite right in his eyes.

  The women who had sought refuge in the houses told her stories of how their partners would do that. Start casting doubt on their decisions, until they couldn’t decide, and needed confirmation.

  It was a way of their partners taking control.

  Sophie knew this and still let Harry get under her skin.

  Today she wasn’t going to let him win.

  If he was doing it to her, he was surely doing it to Jonah, who seemed more than vulnerable at the moment.

  ‘I love him and I know he loves me,’ she eventually replied, checking her watch. ‘I met up because I want you to sign the final papers, and leave Milly out of this. I will fight you.’

  ‘And I will say my child’s mother had attended a crime scene before the police were even told. How would that look? Does that make you a good mother?’

  ‘How do you know?’

  ‘Sophie, I know a lot of things, believe me.’

  Biting her lip, she realised he was going to be a shit through and through.

  At least he was consistent.

  ‘Milly was in the car with Jonah, and they weren’t aware of the situation,’ she lied. ‘How will telling them about you hitting me and walking out when she was a baby? Kay took photos, you know, of my bruised face. That shows what sort of a good influence you have. If you could hit me, you could hit her.’

  ‘Nasty tactics,’ he replied, his jaw clenching at the comment.

  ‘And frankly, I don’t mind if Jonah doesn’t adopt her. She’s as good as his.’

  ‘He might be upset you’re not pursuing it, maybe casting doubts on his parental obligation.’

  ‘Fuck off!’ she said, unable to hold it in. ‘Don’t twist things around. It’s not going to work.’

  ‘Fuck me, Sophie, all night long. I’ll sign the papers for the adoption and will gladly let Jonah go and find another agent. That will work, won’t it?’

  She nearly fell off her chair in shock when Sophie realised he was deadly serious.

  ‘Isn’t this lovely?’

  Jonah was holding Amelia. They were at a party being held to raise money for National Society for Protection of Cruelty to Children; NSPCC, for short. ‘Look at mummy trying to make animals out of balloons.’ He laughed. ‘They all look like giraffes.’

  The little girl giggled in response before wriggling to run off.

  Kay had organised the event and Sophie was helping out.

  A room in a boutique hotel had been hired that led out to a small, closed, garden. The place was packed with celebrity guests and the array of photographers and journalists, who would be attracted to the crowd, not the cause.

  Lots of people he knew were attending, and he hoped this would lighten his mood as well as his wife’s.

  Something had upset Sophie but he didn’t know what. She wouldn’t say.

  And Harry’s proposition, though completely unfathomable, was secretly causing him distress because he couldn’t tell anyone, least of all her.

  She would go ballistic.

  And then laugh.

  Or just both.

  Feeling his phone vibrate, it was another message from Harry. Given what was said, Jonah didn’t want to s
ee, let alone speak to him, but his agent thought otherwise; sending texts asking how he was.

  It was best not to reply, but this message made him freeze.

  ‘How much longer do you need to think about it?’

  Thinking of how to respond, he replied.

  ‘Forever.’

  He sipped his wine and took a deep breath. Right then, he hated Harry more than he had anyone in his life.

  Then he looked over and realised why he would have to consider it.

  His wife.

  But he felt sick at the suggestion his agent had made, so he would have to find a way around it.

  Jonah smiled at Sophie giggling at her rubbish animal sculptures but noticed she didn’t take her eye off the ball with Amelia. The pair of them were watching the child like a hawk. Then their eyes met and she looked a little sad, before smiling but there was a hint of annoyance when she looked away, which he couldn’t quite fathom out.

  He walked up to her and placed a gentle kiss on her forehead before whispering, ‘It’ll be okay.’

  ‘I know,’ she said and rubbed his back before a girl gave the balloon back to her. ‘How can I help?’

  ‘That’s not a cow. It’s a giraffe.’

  ‘It’s a long-necked cow found in the deserts of Somalia,’ she smugly replied to the precocious eight-year-old, a child from an even more precocious actor. ‘If you don’t want it, give it to someone else.’

  ‘But I want a horse.’

  ‘It can be a horse,’ sighed Sophie, starting to grin. ‘Use your imagination.’

  ‘I’m going to tell my dad!’ the child snapped.

  ‘You do that. I’m going on a break.’ Sophie grabbed Jonah’s hand and walked closer to the bar. ‘Bunch of spoilt little bastards in this room. Don’t they know some kids have nothing?’

  ‘Soph, don’t be mean,’ he sniggered, totally agreeing when he looked around. ‘I think in their cases it would be cruelty to adults considering how some of them behave.’

  ‘Ah, look. Milly’s with Madison,’ she said, as he looked over at the large woman cuddling her. ‘She’s not been in a good state since that incident at the house.’

  ‘None of you have,’ he said, seeing her wince. ‘There’s too much going on at the moment. It’s hard to deal with.’

  ‘Are you okay?’ she asked, looking up at him. ‘You seem distracted.’

  ‘I’m fine.’ Jonah glanced away and noticed she was still staring. ‘What?’

  ‘I don’t want secrets between us. I’d hate to think you weren’t telling me things.’

  ‘Why would you say that?’ he asked, forcing a smile.

  ‘Because of that.’

  ‘Because of what?’

  ‘Your smile wasn’t genuine, and you think I’m an idiot not to notice.’ Sophie stepped closer. ‘I spent many months looking at you. In that time, I noticed when you were genuine, and when you weren’t.’

  ‘I’ve got things on my mind.’

  ‘Jonah, I’ve been thinking,’ she said, taking him closer to Amelia but out of earshot of the others. ‘I would prefer if you severe ties with Harry. I think he’s up to no good. You see, I saw him last week. I wanted to chat about the adoption, and realised he hasn’t got a kind bone in his body.’

  ‘And you’re telling me now?’ he said, trying not to get upset. ‘You didn’t think of saying anything before?’ Jonah knew his tone was sharp as Sophie glared at him. ‘Sorry, I didn’t mean to make it sound like that.’

  ‘I don’t think we should be forcing the adoption,’ she whispered, and he squirmed at her comment. ‘He isn’t going to sign the final papers, and he’s spouting all sorts of nonsense; even about me being fit enough to be a mother. If we leave it the way it is, he can’t have access and then nothing will change.’

  ‘Don’t you think I’m good enough to be her dad?’ he asked, trying to hide how hurt he felt.

  ‘You’re more than perfect to be her father.’ She stepped closer and touched his face. ‘I don’t like Harry. The idea that he thinks he has something over me is agitating.’

  ‘Like what?’

  ‘Me being at a scene of a crime before it was reported. He thinks that means I don’t put Milly first.’

  Looking at her, he knew she was holding something back.

  ‘Did he say anything else?’ he asked, wondering if Harry let slip about his proposition to him.

  ‘When you spoke, what did he say?’ Sophie squinted. ‘I mean, he doesn’t do anything for nothing. As an agent, I would expect little else.’

  ‘He said, in so many words, he didn’t think I would be a good father to Milly. Mainly because she was taken and had there been some genetic link, it wouldn’t have happened.’

  ‘I fucking hate him!’ she hissed, making Jonah grimace before smiling. ‘I really, really do.’

  ‘He’s not going to come between us.’

  ‘He’s already trying. Don’t listen to what he says. That man wants to cause trouble. The thing is, he doesn’t want to let you go, that’s the bottom line. And he will do anything to stop you or stop us. I know it. He wants to manipulate us into things we don’t want to do.’

  And Jonah knew she was right, but realised his wife didn’t know the half of it.

  Nor was she ever going to find out.

  ‘I feel out of place.’

  Madison said, touching her newly tinted cherry red hair. ‘They’re all posh.’

  ‘They just work in another field and think it’s the bee’s knees,’ grimaced Sophie. ‘Don’t be fooled because they need money to pay their rent.’

  ‘But I bet they don’t work for minimum wage.’

  ‘Based on how talentless some of them are, that would be too much.’ Both women laughed and glanced around at the party, spilling onto the hotel gardens. ‘I’m pleased you came. I know things have been rough. I hear you’re getting called to give evidence when it goes to court in a few months. Even me.’

  ‘I’m pleased they haven’t locked her up. Gives her a chance to be with her sons and find peace.’

  ‘And her family?’

  ‘Her sister is there for her,’ she replied with a grimace. ‘Her in-laws are still protesting her husband’s innocence.’

  ‘The state of Fadwa and you, well, should put paid to that,’ Sophie whispered. ‘It will be all right. It’s not like decades ago when people weren’t aware of the level of violence happening behind closed doors, or they thought it was acceptable.’

  ‘I feel like I’ve made things worse.’

  ‘He would have hurt her and the kids.’

  ‘Sophie, I was scared,’ Madison whispered, her voice faltering. ‘I thought for one moment it was all over. All I could think about was that my children would see me splattered over her wallpaper.’

  ‘Might have improved the pattern,’ Sophie said, trying to lighten the mood. ‘You need counselling. In a way, this is the worse side of the scenario.’

  ‘And the best side being what?’

  ‘I haven’t thought about that.’ Then she gulped. ‘He won’t be able to hurt her again.’

  ‘Mummy, lift,’ Amelia said, walking up to her. ‘I sleepy.’

  Smiling at the cute little girl with the cake around her mouth, she scooped her up, holding her tightly. Jonah was looking over and nodded when he saw her with Sophie. Amelia rested her head on Sophie’s shoulder and started to suck her thumb.

  ‘Jonah’s been upset since the incident with Milly,’ she whispered, watching her daughter’s eyes close. ‘And Harry’s telling him it’s because he’s not Milly’s biological father.’

  ‘Your ex is a fucking arse,’ whispered Madison, getting a top up of wine. ‘You need to cut him out of your life. If you hadn’t had met Jonah again, then he wouldn’t be a part of it.

  ‘But he is. And that’s the problem.’ Sophie turned so Jonah couldn’t see her speak. ‘You know Harry calls him every day, but Jonah’s not answering so he sends messages. Something happened but Jonah’s not saying.’


  ‘Did you tell him about your ex’s idea to smooth it all over?’ mouthed Madison, starting to grin. ‘That’s one way out of it.’

  ‘I would never do that to Jonah, betray his trust.’

  ‘Are you talking about your ex fucker of a husband?’ asked Kay, sidling up next to her and smiling when she saw Amelia. ‘What a cutie!’

  The child opened her eyes and smiled.

  ‘Did she tell you what he proposed?’ asked Madison, starting to laugh. ‘I mean, what sort of a man would do something like that?’

  ‘Harry James,’ whispered Kay, shaking her head. ‘It’s common knowledge Jonah wants out but something is holding it up. Even Natalie doesn’t know what’s going on and says Harry is being vague.’

  ‘My husband is pretty subdued.’ Sophie lowered her voice. ‘But an animal in the sack.’

  ‘Piggy,’ mumbled Amelia, starting to get upset. ‘Piggy go oink, oink, oink!’

  ‘See, she knows Harry so well,’ whispered Kay, starting to laugh.

  ‘She piggy,’ Amelia said on the verge of tears, pointing across the room. ‘She shout.’

  ‘Who are you talking about?’ asked Madison, laughing into her wine.

  ‘She piggy, go oink, oink, oink!’ said Amelia starting to cry. ‘She shout and shout!’

  ‘That’s Onya, not oink,’ she replied to her child. ‘And she did shout when she came to see us the other day.’

  ‘No! Shout car!’

  ‘Milly, you weren’t in a car with her.’

  ‘She shouts. Piggy when oink, oink, oink!’

  Then the child burst into tears.

  That’s when Sophie’s blood ran cold

  ‘Milly darling,’ said Kay, stepping closer, knowing immediately what the little girl was saying. ‘Do you mean she was in the car with you when you went for the lovely ride?’

  ‘Shout and shout!’ Amelia sobbed. ‘Car go oink, oink. Mummy, I not go!’

  Sophie’s mouth dropped open as she realised who had taken her child.

  ‘Don’t you dare make a scene,’ hissed Madison, whispering into her ear. ‘Milly, go to Auntie Kay.’

  ‘I am going to kill that bitch,’ Sophie said, after handing her over to Kay, who immediately took the crying child into the garden. ‘She better not have taken my child and-.’