Wally

by Rowan Massey

  “Did I fall over?” I checked my ass for mud.

  “No. I was watching. Spitz fell like three times though. You would have laughed your ass off.”

  The three of us stood watching for a while longer. Rydel wouldn’t look at us for some reason.

  “Six drops,” Nando said in my ear, almost whispering. “One of Rydel’s ex girlfriends.”

  That was a lot of drops but there had been plenty of nights like that before.

  I didn’t see Spitz. Nando must have seen me searching for his familiar moves. He pointed, and I thought I saw Spitz’s upturned face. I grinned. Shit, that was some dancing.

  “Wally,” Nando said, hand going up my back and squeezing my shoulder. “You coming over again tonight?”

  His voice in my ear, and hands on me, were making me horny as hell but I couldn’t. I shook my head.

  “Spitz’s girlfriend—Fiona—she’s all fucked up right now, and he can’t stay with her. I gotta take care of him.”

  “C’mon. Just leave him outside my place and come inside for the night.”

  I shook my head again and pulled away a little. He’d just have to be disappointed. I wasn’t sad about Fiona anymore because the fielders had refreshed me, but I loved her, and understood the situation just as well as before. It wasn’t as if I’d forgotten she was at home sick with her awful father and soon wouldn’t have a home anymore. Being near Spitz felt important and right, even if I was horny and dying for Nando to touch my dick again.

  Spitz had slowed to a stop. His grin was huge, and he was looking all around like an idiot.

  “See you tomorrow?” I said to Nando.

  “No, wait.” He grabbed my arm. “Come over and get a shower later. Or just come by if you change your mind.”

  I needed to wash my hair anyway. Doctor’s orders. So I nodded. His face went from grumpy to happy. I smiled back and wanted to try to kiss him again. He wasn’t going to let me, and I wasn’t dumb enough to get rejected twice in one night, so I moved at him fast, then away again. A kiss fake-out. He flinched and give me a little shove. I walked away laughing while he dramatically shook his head and glanced around making sure nobody was watching.

  Spitz ran at me when he spotted me, and we gave each other the usual bear hug. We held on a second longer than usual. We were thinking about Fiona.

  On the way to visit the bodies where they would be dragged and laid out, I pointed out the clean faces of the dancers to Spitz and told him about the weird batch. A seventh body went by—four volunteers taking turns carrying it on a stretcher. The face was vaguely familiar, and I suspected it was a tourist who had joined us recently.

  I saw Doc before spotting the six dead. He was standing tense, neck bent over his clipboard. He was going to make his shoulders cramp like that. When we got close, he shook out his writing hand and waved for us to hurry over.

  “Hey, Doc,” I said, and tried to see what he was writing. Names and sloppy notes that I couldn’t possibly read. “Got questions?”

  “Any new answers?” He seemed irritated.

  “I danced my ass off, and my legs are tired. That’s new. And Spitz fell on his ass a lot.”

  Doc smiled a little. “I saw you. Nando said he was looking out for you two?”

  “Yeah, he’s stalking me.” I grinned and heard Spitz snicker behind me.

  “Don’t get involved with the drug dealing. I heard what you did,” Doc said, distracted and writing again. “Is he still up there selling?”

  “I guess.”

  “Does he have any fielders left?”

  I shrugged. If he was out, he’d go home, but I hadn’t seen him leave. It explained itself.

  “I tried to buy everything they had, but I doubt they gave me all of it…” He tapped his pen on his mouth. “If one of you buys it for me, he’ll know what you’re doing.”

  “Why would he not want you to buy it?” I asked, confused.

  “Because not all of his bosses like what I’m doing.”

  I looked over at Spitz, and he looked as clueless as I was. Who knew.

  We talked a few minutes more, mostly answering pointless questions and letting him check our pulse and crap. When somebody called his name, Doc said goodbye in a hurry and walked off.

  Spitz and I headed for the bodies. One of them was from the early days—maybe one of the few Doc had mentioned. Spitz and I would be an extinct species in no time.

  I sang “Another One Bites the Dust”. They were all laying with their eyes open, looking up at the sky, so I didn’t touch them.

  We headed out in the direction of Fiona’s house. Spitz wanted to stay the night near her place to sneak in and check on her in the morning. It wasn’t a short walk, and we both got tired much faster than usual. My legs were jelly, and I knew his were just as bad. He was walking almost like a drunk, touching the wall now and then and hanging his head. On an ordinary night, he wouldn’t have made it so far. He was pushing himself to get as close to Fiona’s as possible.

  “I have to take a break,” he said, and almost fell when he tried to sit on the curb. I managed to catch him and help him sit slowly. My ass hit the pavement hard when I lowered myself next to him. We leaned against each other, both of us almost panting from exhaustion.

  “Maybe we should chill in a few blocks,” I said.

  He shook his head hard. “No, let’s get to Fiona’s.”

  “I don’t think we’ll make it. Look, I can put an alarm on this phone Doc gave me. That’s what it’s for.” I took the phone out of my pack and started setting it up. “I don’t think it kills the battery.”

  “Okay, but still. Four more blocks at least.” He didn’t even seem surprised I had a phone.

  I groaned. There was no way.

  I couldn’t remember the last time our roles had been reversed over this. Nando’s was less than a block away. I bit my lip. We’d need to backtrack a little, but it was the better option. It was still in a bad neighborhood, but we weren’t going to make it to the better streets anyway.

  “Nando lives right near here,” I said, scratching my chin.

  He looked at me sideways, and I smacked him weakly with the back of my hand.

  “I’m not going to leave you, dumbshit,” I said. “We’re not going to make it far at all, and I’d rather stay by his place. You’ll get to Fiona’s before her dad even leaves. I promise.”

  Instead of going on with my argument, I let the idea sit. He tried to look angry for a minute, but his face relaxed, and he gave in. I got up and helped him to his feet. His hand shook in my grip.

  I gave him some water as we walked, and drank some myself. That much less weight to carry. But we didn’t have food bars, and we usually ate after we left the field.

  “There might be a place open on the way over,” Spitz said. “I’m not sure. A cafe.”

  “Yeah, the breakfast place. Maybe they’ll have bars. Maybe we’ll have a waffle or something.”

  We never went to places where you ate indoors, but I had a new job, and it was a bad couple days for Spitz. I had my heart set on it by the time we rounded the next corner, but I didn’t see any lights that looked like a cafe. Everything was closed. I slumped and whined.

  “No, it’s the next street right after the corner,” Spitz said. “You must be beat.”

  “Oh thank fucking god. And I’m surprised you’re still walking.”

  He snorted.

  Every crack in the stained sidewalk went by like a glacier. When we reached the corner, and I saw the lit up windows, I felt like we’d made it to the North Pole. We almost hurried across the street to get inside. There was no heat, but I could feel some warmth coming from kitchen.

  I’d gotten used to smelling food I couldn’t have, and I’d learned not to let myself focus on it. This time we were going to eat what we were smelling.

  Spitz fell into a hard-seated booth near the doors. I let my pack fall off my shoulders and land opposite him with a thud. He didn’t tell me what he wanted because, of
course, we were getting the cheapest thing they had. I stepped up to the counter.

  “Money first,” the cook said, and looked at me down his nose, probably expecting to have to throw me out. I took my money out and held it up. He raised his eyebrows in surprise but nodded. I knew he now thought I’d jumped somebody, but I didn’t care. Over my shoulder, Spitz looked like he was asleep with his forehead on the table, hair a mess. I wished I could buy him a hat like mine.

  “Pancakes?” the cook asked.

  “Yeah,” I said, not letting myself look at the menu and price. “Big-ass pancakes for both of us, and a cup of coffee.”

  Spitz was into coffee.

  “Ten cents for access to all the syrup, butter, sugar, cream, and whatever else, so long as you don’t take advantage.”

  I gave him a nod.

  I looked over my shoulder again when I heard the total price, but Spitz was oblivious. My money disappeared in the guy’s hand, and I went back to the table to wait. I didn’t dare put my head down next to his. I’d fall asleep in a heartbeat. A muscle in my leg twitched. If that batch of fielders became the new norm, would we lose weight? I didn’t want to think about getting even more hungry, but as long as I held onto my job, we would be fine. But still, I knew we should stop fucking around and start picking up garbage again.

  Being able to turn and see the cook working in the kitchen, hearing the sizzle, and my mouth watering, kept me from dozing off.

  “Alright, kid.”

  I heard the slide of plastic. The cook had put two trays on the counter. I went over and saw that one was our food and the other had all the condiments. I grabbed just enough of everything that he wouldn’t say I was “taking advantage”.

  Spitz jumped awake when I set the plates and cup of coffee in front of him. I put the tray at the other end of the table. He stared at the pancakes with wide eyes and slowly picked up the cup for a careful sip.

  “Okay…” he said, “what’s wrong with it?”

  I snorted. “Nothing. Promise.” I sat down and grabbed my fork, then put it down again and grabbed a plastic thing of butter instead. I had to fiddle a while to open it. Spitz did the same, and we covered everything in as many calories as possible. I made Spitz put sugar in the coffee. He’d never had it that way before.

  We were grinning and shoving our faces full in no time. I’d never eaten that way with Spitz before. If only he could get hired by Doc too. We could get downright fat.

  “Your boss really is spoiling you,” he said. He was thinking the same thing I was. “Can’t believe you did this. Thank you.”

  I made a face at him. For feeding us? We’d never had separate money, so we’d never thanked each other. But I’d spent more than double what we usually did on food and hadn’t even asked what he thought. I was acting like it was my money.

  My shoulders went up to my ears in embarrassment. If he ever said thank you for things like food again, I’d smack the food right out of his mouth. He didn’t notice my reaction, and I told myself to let it go.

  The food disappeared fast. We licked our plates and ate the extra sugar out of the paper packets. I washed all the sweetness down with a lot of water and ended up wanting to die from how stuffed I was. It made me feel a little sick.

  We put our heads on the table and fell asleep for just a couple minutes before we woke to the loud bang of the cook’s hand coming down on the table next to our faces. He kicked us out, and we made our way down a handful of doors to Nando’s place.

  The cold was worse than before, or seemed like it. I felt stupid when I stepped up to the door. It was locked, of course, and the place in the wall where there should have been doorbells was ripped out, leaving only wires.

  I knocked, then looked at Spitz and shrugged when nothing happened.

  “Didn’t he give you his phone number like a good boyfriend?” Spitz grinned. I jumped off the stoop and punched him lightly a couple times.

  The locks rattled, and the door squeaked and whined open. A rough-looking woman with wild hair stuck her head out.

  “If you two are wasting my time I’m about to waste your asses,” she said.

  I almost laughed. She reminded me of the way my mom used to talk when she was angry. It had made me want to laugh at my mom too.

  “We’re looking for Nando,” I said. “We didn’t know how to…” I pointed at the gutted doorbell hole.

  She stood up straight and grunted. “I’ll get him.”

  The door slammed. Spitz took his pack off and let it rest against his leg while he rubbed his hands together.

  “Are you sure this is cool?” he asked.

  “Yeah, he told me to.” I thought about the way he’d touched my neck and back by the field earlier and smiled stupidly.

  “Jesus, you two are for real. Please don’t give me details.”

  I put my head back and laughed. “You’re kidding me! After the shit I had to listen to about Fiona? I’m giving you details that are gonna make me feel gross.”

  He made a face, and we played a lazy game of kicking each other’s shoes.

  The door opened again. Nando was looking down at us. A naked light bulb was shining bright from behind him, making his face hard to make out in the dark. We were all silent for an awkward beat.

  “You can both get a shower if you want, but my landlady says not to make it a habit,” Nando said, and stood aside as an invitation. We went in. I ran my hand over his stomach when I passed him and felt his muscles twitch. He acted like it hadn’t happened. “But fuck her, right?” he said.

  “Nah, I wouldn’t fuck her,” Spitz said, and smirked.

  I kicked his shoe again, and he jumped away from me.

  We all went lazily down the hall around to the bathroom, and Nando gave me a towel, but said he only had the one extra. Spitz shrugged. We always used our dirty set of clothes as towels anyway.

  I showered fast with the medicated soap, then handed it around to Spitz, but not before I told him I’d fooled around with Nando in the stall he was in. He made a puking sound, and I laughed like an evil villain.

  I was out and dressed in a few minutes, but Spitz was taking his time.

  “You taking a nap in there or what?” I asked.

  “It’s warm. Go kiss your boyfriend.”

  “His door is at the end of the hall on the right.”

  “Yeah, like I’m gonna go knocking. Go.”

  Not needing to be told twice, I left the steamy room and stepped into the hall. It made me jump when I saw Nando leaning against the wall, looking at me with his arms crossed. My lungs didn’t want to work exactly right. I took slow steps over to him until we were a foot apart. He pulled me in close too fast and made me trip up.

  We kissed, crushing out faces together. I felt his hands up and down my sides, keeping me squeezed against him. He rolled his hips against me. It was making us both hard. I kept thinking I couldn’t believe he wanted me the way his movements were telling me he did. Was he always like this with guys he had sex with? It made me feel crazy the way I did sometimes when I was starving—like I might cry just from wanting something so bad.

  “Damn, Skippy,” he said, pulling his head back so I couldn’t hang onto the kiss, “please tell me you’re about to ditch him. He seems fine.”

  Spitz looked like shit, and I could tell he couldn’t take his mind off Fiona. He was just trying to act normal. On Doc’s scale, he was usually an eight, but even after going to the field and eating like a king, I’d guess he was a six at best.

  “I’m not ditching him,” I said. “We just decided to crash around here.”

  “Why? You should keep going if you’re staying out there.”

  “We’re too tired.”

  He let his head fall back against the wall so I licked his neck, making him sigh.

  “You guys splurged on pancakes,” he said. “I can taste it.”

  “Yeah, it was amazing.”

  “So, if you have anything left, you could rent the space under the stair
s tonight. Maybe she’ll give you a discount. I’ll ask.”

  I moved my jaw back and forth, and thought about it. It would be great for Spitz to rest and not be worrying about any gunshots we heard or the other homeless people.

  “Maybe,” I said, “but I’m still staying with him to sleep.”

  “Cool, I’ll ask her. It shouldn’t be a lot.”

  I gave Nando the last of my cash, and he went walking down the hall just as Spitz came out of the bathroom.

  “That was the worlds best shower,” Spitz said. “Would be the best day too if it didn’t also suck like a giant cunt.”

  “I know. Sorry, man.” I went and swung an arm around his shoulders and grinned. “One more surprise, though.”

  Fifteen minutes later, we’d settled into the space under the stairs. It was deep and dark—concrete right over out heads. The close feeling was relaxing, even though having only one exit made it a trap.

  Spitz was conking out as soon as he pulled a blanket over himself, so I hurried out and caught Nando before he went to his room.

  “In a few minutes?” I asked. “He’ll pass right the fuck out, but I’ll come back over here to sleep, like I said.”

  He answered by pulling me close by my shirt and kissing me. I felt him take in a sharp breath before letting me go.

  “Don’t disappoint me,” he said. “I have a gun.”

  I laughed. “Yeah,” I said, hooking a finger into his pants, “I’ve seen your gun.”

  “Jesus, you flirt like crazy for somebody who says he’s never even kissed before.”

  “Maybe I just flirt with you.”

  “I don’t believe that for a second.” He shook his head a little. “Go cuddle Mr. Sad in there. I’ll wait.”

  I nodded and crouched to get back under the stairs. Spitz looked like he was asleep, but I felt kind of bad about leaving him at all, so I sat against the wall and pushed my nose between my knees.

  “So you weren’t lying.”

  I jumped. Being so exhausted was making me a little jittery.

  “He’s into you,” Spitz went on, his voice lazy. “Seeing you guys kiss isn’t that weird in person. You can give me details. I won’t bitch about it.”