Undara

by Annie Seaton

  Bluey blew out a ring of smoke, but his eyes were dark as he stared at Travis. ‘I don’t like it. Interfering with nature, that’s what it is.’

  ‘I know.’ Travis stared past him. ‘The place is important to me, too, you know that. But I have to do the best I can for the land and for my family.’

  They stood quietly and watched as the light faded. On the horizon, the towering clouds were shot purple and gold by the setting sun. Travis narrowed his eyes and followed the cloud line as far west as he could see. ‘So, you reckon the rain’s on the way? We’ve had very little so far this season.’

  ‘It’ll be raining by the weekend. You tell them university people it’s time to get out.’

  ‘They’re not working in the tubes that flood.’

  ‘You just tell them to be careful.’

  Before Travis could reply, Bluey walked away and disappeared into the tree line. Travis shook his head. The old bugger was always right. He’d checked the online weather forecast before Emlyn had arrived and there was no rain predicted—that was one thing the computer was useful for. He’d looked at the synoptic charts and they hadn’t indicated much would change over the next week or so. If the rain was coming he was going to have to move the cattle away from the springs.

  If that was the case, unless he could hire again, he’d need Jase and Joel to help him all week.

  There was no point relying on Gavin being around.

  CHAPTER

  20

  Emlyn was looking forward to going to Brisbane. The next night she sat in front of her laptop debating whether or not to let David know she was coming. The room was filled with the sound of clicking keys as each of the team members entered their data, and Larry and Lucy manipulated photographs. Bill’s singing from the kitchen lightened the working environment.

  She hadn’t told David she was flying down yet because she had been in two minds. They needed closure and that wasn’t going happen if he kept emailing her, but they needed to sort out the house sale, and she wanted to establish an amicable relationship. She was in a good place emotionally since she’d talked to Travis. Even though she hadn’t told him everything, his words had stayed with her, and she knew she needed to see David to tell him why they couldn’t be together. It was time to be honest with him. This trip to Brisbane was the perfect time to do it.

  At the same time, she knew that talking to him, and giving the female perspective, had maybe helped Travis understand a little more about how to cope with the deterioration of his marriage.

  Before she could change her mind, she typed his email address into a new message. Even typing David’s name sent a strange feeling through her fingertips—a shakiness that moved straight to her chest. Learning to live a life without him was going to be hard, but she’d made a lot of progress over the past three weeks. A life that no longer had her parents and a life without—

  ‘Emlyn?’ Meg’s voice was soft beside her as she typed.

  Until she turned her head and looked at Meg through a mist of tears, she hadn’t realised she was crying.

  ‘Are you okay, sweetie?’

  Emlyn bit her lip and shook her head. Before she knew what was happening, Meg had taken her arm and they were walking out to the verandah. She couldn’t help but smile through her tears as the smell of curried sausages followed them.

  ‘I don’t know how Bill cooks with one hand out of action,’ she said, trying to get a normal tone into her voice, but her words were muffled from a throat thick with unshed tears. Meeting with David was going to be so … so final. ‘He’s a lovely man.’

  ‘He is. He takes good care of everyone here,’ Meg said.

  They stood side by side looking out over the driveway as the clouds got heavier.

  ‘I’m very lucky.’ Emlyn sniffed and wiped her eyes with the handkerchief she’d found in her pocket. A handkerchief with small sprigs of blue flowers and a lace edge that her mother had crocheted.

  ‘Why do you say that?’ Meg’s voice was soothing, and Emlyn realised that Meg was rubbing her back gently. That brought a fresh swathe of tears. That was how Mum had helped her get to sleep when she was little.

  She sniffed. ‘Smell that?’

  Meg smiled and nodded. ‘I do. I heard you tell Bill it was your favourite meal. You’re right. He is a good man.’

  ‘You’re all good people. I don’t think you realise what a godsend you’ve all been. I know I’ve been quiet, but I’ve appreciated your company, and your kindness. And Travis, too, he’s been amazing.’ Emlyn pushed the handkerchief into her pocket. ‘I need to be grateful and lighten up. I know I’ve been prickly, and I even snapped at poor Larry the other day for no good reason.’

  ‘From what John tells me, he deserves a serve daily.’ Meg gave her a wry look. ‘I know you’ve had some sad times, but I want you to know that I think you’re amazing. You put your head down and soldier on, and the work you’ve been doing with Travis is over and beyond what anyone expects. I know John thinks you’re marvellous.’

  Emlyn chuckled. ‘We’ve got a mutual admiration society going here, haven’t we?’

  ‘If you ever want to talk about it, I’ve got a good ear.’

  ‘Thank you. I didn’t even realise I was crying until you spoke to me. I’m about to take a step in my journey of going it alone. I emailed David—he was my husband—to tell him I want to see him when I’m in Brisbane next week.’

  ‘Does that make you happy or sad?’

  Meg’s tone was just like Mum’s had been when she had talked to her. Her throat thickened again and she swallowed. ‘Sad, I think. Oh, don’t get me wrong. I’ll be happy to see him. I miss him so much. He was a part of me for so long. I’m just discovering who I am without him again.’

  ‘How long were you married?’

  ‘Almost ten years.’

  ‘Are you going to try to reconcile?’

  Emlyn shook her head. ‘No, that can never happen.’

  ‘Did he have an affair?’

  She put her hand to her mouth. ‘Oh my God, no. David would never do that. He loves me.’

  ‘And you love him?’

  Emlyn nodded mutely. ‘I do. But we can’t be together, no matter how much he wants to. I’d destroy us.’

  Meg was quiet for a long time as they stared out at the bush. The light was getting dim and the lights on the timer had come on over on the dongas. ‘Emlyn, I don’t know your circumstances, but I just want to say one thing. If you love your husband and you trust him, I want you to think about giving it another chance. No matter what you are trying to tell yourself, there might be an answer.’

  Emlyn dropped her gaze to the floor. Dozens of black ants were making their way along the wooden floorboard that joined the steps.

  ‘We all have sad times and tragedy and grief in our lives, but you know what holds it together?’ Meg said softly.

  She shook her head as more ants joined the line.

  ‘Love. It might be trite, but it is the answer.’ Meg’s hand rested on Emlyn’s on the verandah rail. ‘When I was in my teens back in the seventies, long before I fell in love with anyone, and long before I met John, there were these little cartoons. I guess you’d call them memes in these days of social media. Little pencil drawings of a cartoon couple, often hiding behind a heart. Every day there was a different one. I used to look for them in my father’s newspaper. And you know which one I remember the most?’

  Emlyn shook her head again.

  ‘Love is looking ahead, not back.’ Meg’s voice was sad. ‘It’s helped me a lot over the years, and it’s given me a rock-solid marriage. John and I have had our share of hard times, but I always remembered that phrase, and, sweetie,’ Meg took both Emlyn’s hands in hers, ‘trust me, it’s so very true. Live in the day and look forwards. You can’t change the past, but you can shape your future. If you love your husband, whatever the issue is, try to work through it.’

  Emlyn took a deep breath. Two people had told her the same thing in two days. Conf
usion ran through her. But they were two people who didn’t know what had happened; it was her fault that the future couldn’t be fixed.

  ‘Promise me you’ll think about it?’ Meg squeezed her hand as Bill hit the dinner gong.

  Emlyn nodded. ‘I will.’

  * * *

  On Monday morning of the following week, Emlyn zipped up her waterproof jacket as she and John came out of the mess. The rain had started in earnest yesterday morning and there’d been some discussion over dinner last night as to whether they’d keep working on the western tube.

  ‘I think we’ll go back to the original tube,’ John said. ‘The new one is a bit low and it’s an unknown. As long as we can get up the hill, we’ll be fine. There’s no sign that the high one has ever been under water.’

  A farm bike came down the drive as they headed for the Troopie. Greg and Larry had gone to change into wet-weather gear, and then they had planned an extra-long day in the tubes. Once they were down there, time meant nothing, and the first afternoon they’d spent in the western tube they’d been surprised it had been almost dark when they’d come up to the surface. With Emlyn away in a couple of days and the weather closing in, they weren’t sure what the rest of the week was going to bring. There had barely been a break in the downpour since the wet weather had arrived. The bush around the camp had greened up already, but the driveway was muddy and slippery.

  The bike slowed as it approached, and Emlyn smiled when Joel pulled up and climbed off.

  ‘Hi, Emlyn,’ he said as he nodded at John. ‘Professor.’

  ‘I’ll go and say goodbye to Meg,’ John said after he shook Joel’s hand.

  ‘Come and stand under the awning.’ Emlyn led Joel to the small car port at the side of the mess. The rain was beating steadily on the tin roof above them.

  Once they were out of the rain, she asked, ‘Is there a problem?’

  ‘Dad asked me to come over. He’s flat out moving the cattle, and I’ve got to get back over there and help him and Jase. He tried to call you, but he couldn’t get through.’

  ‘I let my phone go flat,’ Emlyn apologised. ‘What’s up?’

  ‘We’re going to be busy out on the far boundaries with the cattle for a few days. We have to move a few hundred head across the station because Bluey reckons it’s going to flood. Dad said to wish you luck and to say he’ll be sending positive thoughts down there for Thursday. Jase and I do too, we think it’s an awesome idea.’

  ‘You all be careful out in this weather.’

  ‘We’re used to the wet season. Even Uncle Gavin’s out there in the rain with Dad today. They’ve been out since before light.’ Joel grinned. ‘Oh, and that reminds me. Dad also said to tell you to drive carefully.’

  ‘Thanks for passing the message on. Tell him I’ll call as soon as I know anything.’

  ‘I will.’ Joel stood there awkwardly for a moment. ‘Can I tell you something?’

  ‘Fire away.’ She tipped her head to the side and waited. Both of Travis’s boys were good young men.

  ‘I just want to say thank you. For how good you’ve been for Dad. He hasn’t been happy for a long time, and you’ve really spurred him on with this proposal.’

  Emlyn put up her hands. ‘I can’t take the credit. It’s not just me. John—Professor Kearns—has had a lot to do with the idea.’

  ‘Well, whoever it was, Dad thinks really highly of you. He told us it was all your doing. It will be so cool if this goes ahead. I’d even think about not going to uni and staying here if it happens.’ Joel dropped his head and his boots scuffed at the dirt on the edge of the covered area. The rain hadn’t come in here yet, and the dirt was hard and dry.

  ‘We’ll talk about that in a couple of weeks. I’m happy to advise you.’

  ‘Thanks, Emlyn, you’re way cool.’ Before she could react, Joel leaned over and kissed her cheek and then took off towards the bike.

  * * *

  They put in two long days in the tubes on Tuesday and Wednesday. While Greg and John systematically plotted out another one hundred grids, Emlyn worked on the last of those that they’d set up two weeks ago. Four grids to go, and then when they were finished they could focus the coming weeks on the western tube.

  The work was painstaking; each area was forty centimetres square. Emlyn started clearing the corner of each grid with a small brush and swept the soil aside to see if there were any insect remains in the fine dust. Any rocks in the grid were gently prised out of the dirt and examined carefully before being put aside. Larry sat quietly and patiently with his camera at the ready. Over the past weeks she’d seen a different side to him, and her respect had grown—along with the certainty that they had chosen the right professional for this job.

  Emlyn’s thoughts were scattered today, and she had to concentrate on what she was doing. She wondered if David had received her email, and hoped that he hadn’t got too keyed up, thinking that it was going to mean reconciliation.

  No, that was the wrong term. He’d broached that with her once about nine months ago—just after she’d been discharged from hospital and he’d assumed she would be coming home. When she’d told him she was checking into a bed and breakfast for a few weeks, he’d been bewildered.

  Reconciliation was a process of finding a way to make two different viewpoints accepted by each party. The bottom line was David thought their marriage could work again.

  Emlyn knew it couldn’t.

  She shook her head as she focused on the perfectly preserved skeleton beside a small rock. ‘More light please, Larry.’

  He obliged without speaking; Larry was fitting in well with the team now.

  ‘Photo, please.’ She sat back as he set up his light and took a photo of the insect skeleton in situ before she gently picked it up with her tweezers and set it in a jar, labelling it with the date and the grid address. That night it would join the other specimens in the makeshift laboratory they’d set up in the small room off the workroom. Already the shelves were full of small labelled jars filled with hard-bodied immatures. But apart from the one new species they’d discovered here, there had been little of major interest in this cave. These specimens were providing a base line for the study and the reports that would be written up. They had barely scratched the surface yet. There was a lot more work to be done here; the lure of the bad-air cave was the impetus that spurred them on with the slower work in this cave. After she’d placed the specimen in the jar, she stretched and looked around to see how far Greg and John had progressed. Sometimes the scars on her arm burned if she stayed in the one position for too long.

  ‘Cup of tea, anyone?’ she called.

  ‘I thought you’d never ask.’ Greg turned around with a grin. ‘I’m with you. It seems a bit hotter down here today, don’t you think?’

  ‘It’s the humidity from the rain,’ John replied as he stood. ‘I’m keeping an eye out for any water in here.’

  ‘Maybe we should take the equipment that we’re not using closer to the entrance?’ Larry said. ‘Actually, I think I’ll take most of it back now.’

  Greg nodded. ‘Better to be safe than sorry. We should be right here, but if there was a flash flood, we don’t want to be scrabbling to pull equipment back at the last minute.’

  ‘I think in the interests of safety, if this rain continues for the rest of today we’ll have a couple of days back at camp. There’s plenty we can catch up on.’ He turned to Emlyn with a cheeky smile. ‘And there’s no need for you to look so pleased, Dr Rees. Were you worried we were going to make some more groundbreaking discoveries while you were in Brisbane?’

  The camaraderie between the group was easy now, and Emlyn had become more talkative over the past weeks. One night over dinner, she’d laughed for a couple of minutes at one of Larry’s lame jokes and had seen the satisfied look that Meg and Lucy had exchanged.

  But it didn’t bother her; the more time that passed, the better she was feeling. The nights had become easier. She was so tired after a day und
erground, and often a late dinner, and then working into the night, she simply didn’t have time to think about everything she’d lost, and for that she was grateful.

  CHAPTER

  21

  Emlyn was up early on Thursday. The room was dark, and she had to switch on the light before she headed for the shower. It felt strange not to be pulling on her work clothes and boots, and she stood looking through her backpack for something suitable to wear. Her denim jeans and a long-sleeved chambray shirt over a white T-shirt would have to do. Not corporate enough for the sponsorship meeting, but that was the best she had with her. At least she’d be comfortable on the flight. It was past time she got the rest of her clothes from the house.

  She pulled out the small synthetic backpack that she kept for overnight trips, and slipped in her wallet, a change of underwear and her toothbrush. Her phone fitted neatly into her front jeans pocket. Anything else she needed she could buy or get from the house. Once there was an email back from David, she’d reply and arrange to meet him there tonight. Closing the door behind her, she walked outside and slipped on her good leather boots before she made her way over to the mess. Even this early, the enticing aroma of bacon and eggs was drifting over the camp, and she smiled as she walked into the kitchen.

  ‘You could have had a sleep-in, Bill. Didn’t you hear they’re staying in today?’

  ‘I did. But you still need feeding before you head out.’

  ‘I could have grabbed some cereal. Easier for you than cooking with a bandaged hand.’

  ‘Stop fussing.’ His grin was wide. ‘You’ve got a long drive ahead. I could have taken you, you know.’

  ‘One-handed, now that’d be safe,’ she joked. ‘It’s okay. I’m a big girl and quite capable of driving myself to the airport.’

  ‘Do you good to get away for a few days, love,’ Bill said. ‘But it’ll be quiet here without you. You’re such a noisy bugger.’ He grinned at her as he broke an egg into the pan one-handed.

  She nudged him as she poured a coffee. ‘At least you won’t have to cook as much with me gone.’