‘You’re the one, Finn. No matter how things work out with us, you’re the only man I’ve ever wanted—the only man I have ever imagined I could care for. Please make love to me. Give me memories, if nothing else, that I can carry with me no matter where life might take me.’
‘Natalia...’ Her name seemed wrenched out of him in a harsh, heartrending sob as he gathered her into his arms.
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
BREAKFAST AT THE chalet early the next morning was a subdued event. Amelie wasn’t present because she wasn’t feeling well. Morning sickness, Natalia suspected. For the first time in her life, she had a flash of concern for herself—what if she was pregnant? She dismissed the thought—Finn had been meticulous about protection. But then she allowed herself the momentary indulgence of wondering what a child of theirs might be like—almost certainly dark-haired, smart, attractive...
She cast a quick, surreptitious look over to Finn. He seemed sombre, with dark circles under his eyes. Neither of them had got more than a few hours’ sleep. They’d found better ways to use their time rather than waste it on sleeping.
The intimacy they’d shared had gone beyond the physical. They’d both been in tears when they’d had to say goodbye in the last private moments they would share until heaven knew when. She had never felt sadder than when she’d sneaked out of his room just before dawn.
She’d felt awkward when she’d got to the breakfast table, to find Finn already there making polite conversation with Marco. Had Marco guessed she’d spent the night with Finn? The only evidence was a slight beard rash, but she’d covered that with make-up.
She longed to seat herself next to Finn—her lover!—as close as she possibly could. But that was out of the question. Instead she acted the gracious hostess to both Finn and Marco.
She gagged at the thought of eating—not the delicious bread rolls Hanna had baked fresh, not Matteo’s fabulous cheese or even the finely sliced ham and fresh fruit. Black coffee was all she could tolerate. She was too miserable at the prospect of Finn leaving in just a few hours.
She was about to ask Finn and Marco for the umpteenth time if there was anything else they needed, when she looked up to see big fat snowflakes drifting past the window. She alerted the others.
‘The first snow!’
She’d never lost the excitement of the first fall, but she wasn’t always at the chalet to see it. Was it an omen that perhaps—just perhaps—things might work out for her and Finn?
With Marco predicting the possibilities of skiable snow, and Finn saying snow was a novelty for a Sydney boy, any awkwardness was smoothed over. And the snowfall propelled her and Finn to start their journey back to the palace straight away, as their driver was worried that the roads might be affected.
They needed to be back in plenty of time for their meeting with the Chamber of Commerce.
She and Finn passed their journey back to the palace in much the way they had the journey to the chalet. The only difference was that Finn spent quite some time on his cell phone, for which he apologised.
‘I have to check all is okay with my meetings in Dublin and London.’ He leaned over to her. ‘I’m glad we’ve got one more business meeting together.’
‘Even if it’s likely to be the stuffiest,’ she said.
‘It’s a way to extend our time together for as long as possible. No meeting could possibly be stuffy with you chairing it.’
‘Thank you,’ she said, aching to touch him—even put her hand on his arm—but knowing it would not be wise. She mustn’t risk any hint of scandal—not when they had been so discreet.
* * *
Finn was proud of the way Natalia conducted herself at the meeting later that morning. The men and women of the Chamber of Commerce were delighted that their Princess was taking an active interest in local businesses, and Tristan and his savvy sister—Gemma was again absent—worked well together. She would be an asset to any business. To any country.
To him.
It was a kind of torture to play the polite visitor when Natalia was in the room and all he wanted to do was be by her side, claiming her as his own. But he was just a guy from Australia, whose interest lay in the gourmet foods he could import at a profit into his country on the other side of the world.
He was very aware of how deep the roots of this country went. How old the traditions of the people were. How conservative their customs. To uproot Natalia might not be the best option for her.
His grandparents were great gardeners. He knew from working with them that sometimes a plant uprooted from a particular type of soil did not transplant successfully, but rather withered and died. Natalia was the most beautiful flower, adapted to thrive in this fantasy land of castles and dungeons and family retainers. Sydney was an altogether brasher place, and tough in its own way.
Natalia smiled at him from across the room. To chat about chocolate and cheese with her, without acknowledging that she had been in his bed last night, was excruciating.
What he felt for her was so much more than infatuation. It had been from the get-go. He realised that now. Everything about Natalia felt so right, and just her smile sent his heart soaring to heaven. It had nothing to do with her being a princess, and everything to do with her being the perfect woman for him. Yet there were very real obstacles to be overcome.
He had to make option two work. In the next two weeks away from her, he would come up with a plan.
At the end of the meeting he shook hands with her in a formal goodbye that tore him apart. He could tell from the almost imperceptible quiver of her lower lip that she was finding it equally torturous. How quickly he’d learned to read her.
As he made his way to the official car that was taking him and the master chocolatier to the airport, and thence to Dublin, he found every excuse to turn back and see ever-diminishing last glimpses of her.
He had a horrible fear that her family would try to make sure he never saw her again. But he would never let that happen.
* * *
That afternoon, alone in her apartment, Natalia missed Finn so desperately it physically hurt. She literally could not think of anything else but him.
She had been premature in believing the dark cloud of gloom that had hung over her for so long had dissipated. It had eased. But it was still like a grey fog that strangled the vitality from her, misted her vision of any hope for the future.
He had gone.
The meeting with the Chamber of Commerce that morning had concluded only too quickly After she’d waved Finn goodbye, with the perfectly calibrated royal wave she had been trained to do from a little girl, she’d had a quick chat with Tristan to review the other meetings she’d had with Finn. Her brother seemed to have a high opinion of Finn, and she had sensed Tristan could become an ally if she ever had to fight for her right to be with a man her parents considered unsuitable.
She had to gather her allies. And Tristan had already fought and won his own battle with Montovian tradition.
After her exchange with Tristan she had pleaded a headache and headed for her apartment in the palace. The perfectly decorated apartment that felt suddenly as lonely as if she were in exile.
Despite thoughts of Finn and their options churning through her brain, she decided to try and sleep, fully clothed on her bed. After all, she had had virtually no sleep the night before. But before she was overwhelmed by drowsiness she phoned through to her mother’s private secretary and booked an appointment with the Queen for the following morning.
She was pretty sure she knew what she had to do.
At some stage she awoke and reached out for Finn—only to find cold, empty sheets. Even after one night of sleeping in his arms she knew she wanted him always there—in her bed, by her side, sharing her life. Being with Finn had become more important than anything. This was—at last—love. That elusive emotion she’d feared she might never find.
She just hoped—prayed—that Finn felt it too. Because she could never settle for less than his whole-hearted love in return.
Holding that thought, she got up and showered, changed and climbed back into bed.
But sleep didn’t come easily, and it was late by the time she drifted off again.
She was woken by the sound of her phone, saw it was still early, reached out to her nightstand, fumbled for the phone and looked for the caller ID.
Finn!
She was immediately awake. Then she burst into tears at the sound of his voice.
‘Hey, what’s going on?’ he said. ‘Are those tears I hear?’
She sniffed. ‘No. Yes. I was just...overwhelmed to hear your voice. I... I think I had a deep fear I might never talk to you again.’
‘That’s not going to happen. We’re talking now, aren’t we? And we need to talk some more.’
‘Where are you? In Dublin? London?’
‘I’m here. In Montovia.’
She thought she was hearing things. ‘At the palace?’
‘I didn’t think I should storm the walls and come and find you,’ he said, in that laconic manner she liked so much. ‘I’m at the tea room with the chocolate in the old town. Can you meet me here?’
‘Now?’
‘If a princess is allowed to do such an ordinary thing as meet a man for coffee.’
‘This isn’t a dream?’
‘No.’
‘Then the answer is yes!’
Fired with sudden energy, she quickly fixed her hair and applied make-up with hands that trembled with excitement. No matter how desperate she was to see Finn, the Princess of Montovia did not go outside the palace looking less than her best.
She threw on skinny black trousers, a tight black cashmere turtleneck, black boots with a heel that could handle cobblestones, and a gorgeous loose-weave wool short coat in different shades of pink that she’d been too depressed to wear after she’d bought it. Contemporary pink ruby earrings and a bracelet completed the look.
She booked a palace car to take her down to the old town and then ran from her apartment—something that really wasn’t done in the corridors of the royal palace of Montovia.
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
NATALIA STILL WASN’T quite sure that Finn’s call hadn’t been a dream—a manifestation of her longing for him. But there he was, sitting at the most private table available at the tea room. He rose to greet her, darkly handsome in a superbly tailored business suit. Joy bubbled up inside her.
She forced herself to walk to him at a suitably sedate pace, when really she wanted to run and fling herself into his arms. She greeted him with a businesslike handshake, then sat down opposite him. This was one place where she would be observed and her behaviour noted by the townsfolk.
He’d ordered her the hot chocolate she’d been enjoying here since she was a child. He had a coffee in front of him—short and black. He offered her a chocolate croissant, but she declined.
‘It’s so good to see you,’ he said, his voice hushed.
Hopefully there was enough clatter from the other tables to mask their conversation.
‘Oh, Finn, I can’t tell you how amazing it is to see you. I... I think my heart is literally jumping for joy. But what are you doing here? How...? Why...?’
‘I cancelled my meetings in London, postponed my flight back to Sydney and flew back here from Dublin after the meeting. I stayed last night in a small hotel near the clock tower. Not that I slept.’
‘Why didn’t you tell me?’
‘It was late when I got in. Besides, I needed some time to plan my strategy.’ He leaned across the table towards her, his eyes intense. ‘You see, beautiful, wonderful, perfect Natalia, I realised nothing was more important in my life than you. Nothing.’
‘Oh, Finn, I feel the same.’
Her heart soared with the knowledge that he cared for her too. She ached to kiss him, but she knew they had an audience. A discreet, quiet audience, but an audience just the same.
‘I wanted a plan for how to put option two into action. But option two without the separation, the long-distance angst. I decided I would come here to live. Not permanently. I thought three months...on a tourist visa. I could find an apartment here in the old town, so I would be near to you in the castle. As long as it had good Wi-Fi, I could work remotely. Then, as we discussed, we could start dating. Three months should give us time to get to know each other better.’
He looked very pleased with himself.
Her heart soared. ‘But, Finn, I—’
He put up his hand to stop her. ‘Hear me out. I can afford to ease off the pedal on my business for a few months. I’ve thought about what you said about being frightened. I realised I was scared too—of leaving behind my country and people I love to be a foreigner in a strange land.’
‘It is scary,’ she said.
‘But that’s exactly what my family did. My father left Ireland for a better life than on the small farm where he grew up. When my great-grandparents emigrated to Australia they left everything—everyone—for the chance of a better life. My Chinese great-grandparents were fleeing persecution...my Italian great-grandparents were fleeing poverty. In their day, there were only letters that took weeks to be delivered to communicate with the loved ones they’d left behind. My Chinese great-grandparents never saw their parents again. My grandparents had to fight prejudice and racism to be together and become the Romeo and Juliet of their suburb. That’s the background I come from. Why shouldn’t I be prepared to emigrate to build a life with you? I want to give it a trial for three months. That is if it’s what you want too.’
Natalia laughed a laugh that she knew was tinged with hysteria. ‘But I had the same idea. I decided we should try option two without all the long-distance to-ing and fro-ing by me living in Sydney for a while.’
‘What?’
‘Yes!’ She lowered her voice. ‘The plan I came up with was that I would come and live in Sydney for six months, so we could spend time together and get to know each other better. But perhaps three months might be more feasible. I would take a sabbatical from some of my charity commitments and work online for the auctions. I have good people to help here while I’m away. I thought of leasing an apartment near where Eliza and Jake live. You wouldn’t be far. Perhaps I could meet your family, too? But the idea is to be near you, Finn. After our time in the chalet I cannot bear the thought of being parted from you again.’
‘I hated being apart from you just that one night.’
He laughed, and she loved the edge of incredulous delight in his laughter.
‘I can’t believe we independently came up with two versions of the same solution at the same time.’
‘Perhaps we can do both,’ she said.
‘Why not? I’ll live in Montovia near you for three months...’ he said.
‘Then I’ll move to Sydney for three months to be with you. I would love that. I was going to call you this morning to see what you thought of my idea.’
‘And now I’m here to talk to you in person, because I couldn’t stay away from you.’
‘I’ve booked a meeting with my mother this morning, to tell her of my plans. But I’ll go with you to Sydney anyway—even if she doesn’t approve.’ She paused. ‘Your approval is all I need, Finn.’
‘You have it wholeheartedly. We will make the decisions that affect our lives. And, while I’m certain I’ll enjoy my three months living here near you, I will love having you in Sydney. I know my family will welcome you with open arms.’
‘Oh, Finn, this is just wonderful!’
He leaned across the table and kissed her, his lips firm and possessive on hers. The kiss was short and sweet and utterly heartfelt.
And greeted by a chorus of applause and bravos.
Natalia broke away from the kiss and saw the smiling fa
ce of the tea room proprietor—a jovial, elderly man who had known her since she was a child. Everyone else in the shop would know who she was too, and about her history of turning down proposal after proposal, but all she saw were kind faces and goodwill.
She smiled back, unable to contain her joy that Finn was in her life and they could be open about what they meant to each other.
The alarm on her watch went off. ‘Ack! I’m meeting with my mother in twenty minutes. I’ve got to go—try and head her off before the news breaks that the Princess was seen kissing a handsome foreigner in the chocolate shop.’
‘I’m coming too. We’ll face her together. Let’s start as we mean to continue—as a couple.’
They left the tea room to further applause, and headed for Natalia’s car and driver.
‘Wait,’ Finn said. ‘I have a suggestion. Rather than confronting the Queen with a fait accompli, why don’t we ask her advice on how we can make it work?’
‘Good idea,’ Natalia said. ‘Excellent idea. You might end up a Montovian diplomat yet.’
Natalia was glad they’d agreed on Finn’s strategy. When they entered the Queen’s office she could tell by her mother’s frosty expression that the news from the tea room had already reached her.
Her mother sat behind her ornate antique desk. She did not offer Natalia and Finn a chair, but rather let them stand. Finn gave a deep bow to the Queen, as Natalia had coached him. He did an excellent job. It was as if he were born to it.
‘Your Majesty, Natalia and I beg your forgiveness for our indiscreet behaviour in the tea room.’
‘We’re in a relationship, Mother,’ Natalie said. ‘We couldn’t help it. By the time you told me to “nip it in the bud” it was too late. This morning I was so happy I forgot I shouldn’t be kissing Finn in public. Please take me off the royal matchmaking list. From now on I’m only dating Finn.’
‘Where do you think this will take you?’ said the Queen.
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