Hell Again

by Mihret Adal Gidi

  This can’t be happening; I wonder, looking at the situation before me. I have so much to ask her, so much. I feel my lips growing dryer and drier from one second to the next. I let my hands off from my ears as I lean my weight on my knees pressing it with my hands.

  “Betesebochesh, eyefelegush new,” she says, looking at me. It’s as if she is telling me not to ever give up.

  “Mum, Dad,” I whisper and Zhai holds me, kneeling besides me as I lean on her to find comfort. My voice isn’t audible even to myself but Zhai seems to understand me to some point.

  It feels like the intruder is leaving and she knows it that she is trying to tell me anyway. “Sirochun!” she screams. She is not able to complete her words since when she gets too close to the root, she gets sucked into it; as if a rough magnetic pull. Fortunately, for her, the creature already attacked and if it wasn’t for her getting sucked into the root, she would have been smashed by the long hands; it smacks on the roots and fracturs it. It then turns to us and we both looks up to it jumpy as we hug each other, but then again, as if it hears a calling it turns its attention to the woods and with its hands and legs it starts running to the woods, like a jaguar, as the other two, who were almost closing up on us, to attack the intruder, follows the one that was already here, in distance.

  What’s going on is not clear to me; disturbing sounds have already deafened my ears, it’s not coming from external force, but my blood pressure is dropping…or, I don’t know, rising? I can’t really say, but is there any possible way that a blood can rush into rising and lowering at the same time? What I am saying is that I am feeling that crazy. I can feel a contraction on the nape of my neck, cold feeling rushing on my face and suddenly my body feels to weigh equal to a huge limestone that I am not able to stand on my own.

  Moments later, I slowly starts to regain my consciousness and I realise I am in Zhai’s supportive embrace. I think I am not feeling good; I am thinking if we just lost the one and only chance of our way out this hell, and all thanks to that... Katrin. I am sure that the intruder was trying to say something helping to our situation, but I doubt if I understand well. For now, the fact of knowing my parents, still looking for me is enough. That’s the only courage I am left with.

  “Waha…say…?” I know Zhai is asking me questions, but I am starting to calm down now that my ears are giving me little and fractured words. I slowly turn to face her staggering to stay still, but I kneel down as I look into her eyes. “Wha did she say?” It’s finally clear to my ears. Zhai is frowning in worry.

  “She…” my voice is shaky, and I utter breathy. “My parents, my parents are looking for me.” I am laughing mixed with sobbing. I am both happy and sad, hopeful and hopeless…I am confused, and everything is luminous clear to my perception.

  Zhai’s frown lines slowly fade away into a smile, but somehow, she is a bit perplexed about whether to laugh for this, or question me if I am sure. “No,” shaking her head, she frowns and looks to my left in fear and in begging manner. Her eyes suddenly fill with tears.

  “What?” Whispering, I slowly turn to the same direction to see what she is looking at.

  I can see them all, warrior-like, dressed, three deities-looking ladies standing behind Katrine. I said she is the tallest of all the ladies at the dinner earlier, but she looks shorter among these ladies. Her arms are crossed on her chest, satisfied about what she just heard, and I can tell she have no good intention.

  I don’t get it, I think this is good news for our kind, for man in this world. I don’t understand what bad she can make out of this, but I can tell she can.

  My eyes once again skip to the ladies behind her; all three of them are holding long spear in their right hands, their heads covered with golden attic-style helmet with long nosepiece. Their feet are that of a donkey. I swallow nothing down my throat, hard, and I once again look back to Katrin, mirroring Zhai’s reaction; begging-like gaze back to her.

  “Iolcam tbl adagita ds,” Katrin utters in a strange tongue and all the ladies march towards our direction.

  I was in a fight before; one that I lost and the other that I won. I was also in a situation I thought was hard; I was a prey for a predator, while I was working in the zoo. A lion escaped and I almost died trying to get it back to its enclosure; I played a bet to run into its space and had to find a way out. That was a life and death moment for me, but I was able to make it out alive and safe that got me a promotion to become a manager. I was the king and queen of my type of fortress and bold enough to take action in the front line at moments that feels wrong or dangerous. The only instinct I have in me is to fight or run, whether I can or not depends on the result of my running and trying.

  “Oh, no, no, please…” Zhai starts sobbing, staying still on the ground but I didn’t want to waste time begging. I just stand from the ground, trying to run away and into the woods, but my dress isn’t comfortable that one of them reaches me and grip me on the nape of my neck. I have no choice but to scream as I fidget, to set myself free. Too strong, I don’t even know why I am trying at all, but I think I finally understand why Zhai wasn’t trying anything at all. I know now that they are strong and fast… perhaps too fast as a wind. I keep trying to escape her grip on my nape, crying and cursing Katrin as loud as I can be as I try to hit her at the same time, even though I know I can’t reach to her, I am anyways trying.

  ***

  Tirgume’s condition isn’t getting better, though not as fast as the rising temperature in the living room that suddenly changed into an ice room. The ice that was formed at the corner of the ceiling, chandelier, the corner of the sofas and chairs are starting to melt down, wetting everything. Everyone is breathing heavy as they try to warm their hands with their breath and they’re coughing now and then.

  Membere is sitting beside Tirgum’s body they lay on the ground moments earlier as soon as it starts relaxing. She is trying to warm Tirgume’s right hand in her hands with her breath as Bamlakfekad keeps his prayer as he tries to warm Membere with his hands rubbed on her shoulders, wrapped in his jacket he was wearing.

  On the other hand, Mrs Asnakech isn’t feeling well, like she has lost her mind for a while; she is boiling water on the boiler, using a three-stock pot to have as much hot water as she can get. She would run into the kitchen with a bucket and once she fills it with the hot water, she would refill the stock pots once again and run back to the living room and pour it on Tirgume’s body, screaming, sobbing and talking nonsense.

  “It’s me, my fault…I hope I die,” she pats her lap with her hands hard enough and then hits herself on her chest. She kneels besides her and takes her left hand trying to warm her like Membere. “Why didn’t you just kill me?” She wishes ill up on herself, looking up, assuming she is talking with God.

  “Did anyone call the ambulance?” Bamlakfekad screams, ceasing on his prayer for a while.

  “Yes, yes…I did…recently…” she utters in pain as she rocks back and forth. “It was better if I was deaf, I wouldn’t hear about anything at all…it’s all…”

  “Please stop, don’t say that…” Membere says, sobbing as she looks at Mrs Asnakech in worry. “Please,” she adds and gets her attention back to Tirgume.

  “It’s me…” Mrs Asnakech adds. Imprisoning her head between her elbow, she keeps her hands at the nape of her neck and screams as loud as she can, hoping she will get a relief from her worries. “This has never happened before; I never saw this happening…what’s going on?” Mrs Asnakech couldn’t stop her screaming.

  Slowly, Tirgume moves her index finger that’s trapped between Membere’s palms, making her gasp in excitement. Nothing feels more reliving for her at this time than knowing Tirgume is awaken and fine.

  “I think her… Oh God!” Membere screams, before completing her sentence as Tirgume starts fidgeting suddenly. As if her body is fighting to regain its position, it starts seizing roughly and Bamlakfekad holds her still on the ground, pushing his wife aside and pressing her down on her sh
oulders. In his mind, to calm her down, this is the only choice he is left with. Membere gets to her legs and holds her with her hands, as if it can help out the situation under control. Mrs Asnakech loses her mind as she keep sobbing and screaming.

  “What is going on!” a middle-aged man screams as he jumps in the living room. It’s clear he heard the bad news about Tirgume that he looks like someone who just ran out his office without looking back at himself. He is in white shirt and his red tie is widened to his right side as it is pulled to get pulled off his head, his chino pants are wrinkled from sitting for a long time and he is in a quarter brogue oxford pair. He is sweating and breathing like he just ran a marathon.

  “I…” Mrs Asnakech utters as she presses on her chest. Her eyes fixed on him as she stands up with her right hand pressed on her chest as her lips are slightly gasping.

  “Shut up, you need to shut up,” he says and starts to where Tirgume is lying by. Pushing Bamlakfekad off from her, he simply places her head on his lap and start to struggle to open her mouth that’s shut hard and still.

  “Wait,” Membere says and reaches to her cheek and presses her on her cheek; her right hand’s index finger on Tirgume’s left side of cheek and her left-hand thumb pressing on her right side of her cheek. It makes it easier for him to open her mouth, and before he hesitated, he placed his left hand dorsal between her teeth. He wants her to harm less of herself with a comfort he is willing to offer her with his discomfort that could come from her biting.

  “Gerumye,” Mrs Asnakech calls his name as she crawls towards him but holding his right hand in the air, he stops her from going on and on about what she would say to him.

  Membere gets in Bamlakfekad’s embrace, looking down at Tirgume and her husband.

  “Look…”

  “I told you!” he screams, stopping Mrs Asnakech from proceeding on her words. He turns his attention to the gusts in his house. He doesn’t want her to offer anyone spiritual service any more. “I told you haven’t I, Asnakech? I. Begged. You,” he pleads turning his attention back to Mrs Asnakech. He is scared of losing his wife just as much as he is mad at Mrs Asnakech for insisting on bringing peoples seeking his wife’s spiritual guidance.

  “Gerume, all…”

  “All I need to know is…” he opens his eyes and looks around the house that’s soaking. “What happened here?”

  “We don’t know, it suddenly gets really cold, like ice cold,” Membere answers as she looks around; she didn’t notice what’s happening until now.

  “Ambulance will be here soon,” Bamlakfekad takes over and he looks down at Tirgume, who is calming down.

  “I’m a doctor,” Gerum utters, hating to see to their direction and his right hand starts to stroke her hair back. “How,” he whispers, looking down at her as if he is asking her. “Wake up, wake up,” he takes on a mantra.

  Just as they hear an ambulance siren from outside the house, Mrs Asnakech rushes out to get the help into the house. Before anyone enjoys the arrival of help so little as Mrs Asnakech, Tirgume sets up gasping loud and sudden, making everyone jumpy and making Membere yelp loudly; looking at Tirgume as she presses on her chest.

  ***

  It’s almost as if everything is playing in motion. It all happens in short period of time. It feels like trying to fix a broken mirror into a brand new one. Tirgume couldn’t regain her consciousness back for a while that she couldn’t believe she really is back in time; to pick up from where she left off, just like that. Her eyes are wide open and still as she tries her best to look around to her surrounding; it’s almost as if she couldn’t make a sense out of where she is or what is going on.

  Voices aren’t clearly pouring into her ears and her visions are blurry. Her breathing and her heart bit dominate everything to her hearing senses. She is doing her best trying to breathe normally as much as she could; her mouth is wide open as she breathes through it. Slowly, she regains the sensational feeling that make humans feel like humans; pain, coldness…extreme coldness to the point that it’s causing her pain. She then starts to feel peoples touching her, lifting her from the ground and placed back on something. Everything starts to play back in her mind to her clear perceptional understanding.

  Once Tirgume is placed on the lightweight emergency stretcher, she starts looking for Bamlakfekad and Mmebere with her eyes as she tries to sit up with so little energy she is left with. She wants to tell them everything as soon as possible. She tries to get up, but a male paramedic presses her back on the stretcher.

  “Calm down,” he says and gets back to tightening the straps on her body. He looks concerned and extra careful with her; seems like they know her husband and his cautious staring at them and what they are doing is stressing them out.

  “Enate, what is it?” Gerum gets closer to her and holds her right hand, passing his hand through the blanket they use to warm her with. Enate is his way of addressing his wife lovingly; she is indeed his mother with the care she always offers him, as much as with love she showers him.

  “The…” she couldn’t speak clearly, and she don’t want to waste her energy talking with her husband. She knows what he thinks about this, in general, and she is sure, that finding her sick would aggravate his hate. She simply points to Bamlakfekad and Membere with her eyes, as she lifts her eyebrows towards them. Gerum simply closes his eyes in disappointment but Membere runs to get closer.

  “What?” Membere whispers and as Bamlakfekad gets closer, he looks at Tirgume’s husband instructing the paramedics to step away from them for momentary privacy. “What is it?” Membere asks her, feeling like crying.

  Tirgume moves her lips trying to speak up but she can’t. Membere and Bamlakfekad look at each other and lowers to her presence; getting their ears closer to her lips, both of them kneeling beside her on each side.

  “I saw her,” she hardly whispers but a lot like a breathy utterance and Membere squeaks once, pressing on her chest, but Bamlakfekad stays still, as if he just turned into an effigy and Tirgume closes her eyes. “She is not dead,” she adds. Tirgume is feeling the coldness getting under her skin; not only her body but even her voice is starting to shake as she whispers, breathy. They are both doing their very best to listen to her, focused.

  “Oh God,” Membere utters loudly sobbing, but still pressing her chest harder with her hands in a fisting gesture to the point that her skin is turning white. No move or a breath from Bamlakfekad.

  “She is not dead,” she repeats herself. She is now shivering from the cold feeling she is getting and she just start cognisant to the pain on her left forearm; from an injury and no one noticed it yet. “She is alive,” she presses a ghostlike smile on her dry and dark lips. “She is also not alive,” she utters and Membere frowns, lifting her head to look at her, perplexed to what she wants to say. “She will come back if she understood what I said to her,” She is talking, her eyes fixed to the ceiling, no blinking at all, the dark circle on her eyes makes her look pale; she talks like she has no choice but to talk. “She will come back if she follows the roots, through the roots.” Membere looks up to her husband, who is not moving a muscle and looks down at her, once again.

  “What are you talking about?” Membere whispers as she asks. She is whispering, as if it’s an obligation.

  “I have never been there, this never happened,” Tirgume is still uttering but nothing Membere nor Bamlakfekad can understand. “I don’t understand,” she keeps uttering in unvarying tone of voice. “She. Adha is still alive, I saw her. She is alive and as good as dead. She must follow the roots and she will be home. She should find her way through the roots and she will be home.” She is talking as if someone who is doing her best not to forget what she is meant to say.

  “Where is she if she’s not dead? I thought you said you can see her if she is dead,” Bamlakfekad finally utters a whisper. Tirgume suddenly stops talking.

  “We need to get her to the hospital,” one of the paramedics utters, irritated.

  “Hurry
,” Gerum orders and runs to the door and holds it open.

  “Please,” Membere pleads, following them as they start walking.

  “She’s not dead but she’s as good as dead, I saw her and she’s alive…” Tirgume proceeds on her recitation-like utterance.

  “Where is she?” Membere screams. “Where can I find her?” She is sobbing, and once again, Tirgume ceases on her mumbling. She turns to her right, where Membere is following her while crying. Her eyes look down to the floor to the hair band she grips from that world, Adha’s hairband, and then up to Membere.

  “Far, far away from home, wait for her if she uses the roots she’ll come back home.” Tirgume stays, still looking at her with her eyes still.

  “Where?” Membere whispers, looking at her as she stands still and then proceeds to follow her. She just can’t understand, but from the little, that Tirgume is mumbling, she is guessing she might me hidden somewhere in the woods.

  “I don’t know where. I’ve never been there, but she’s alive, I saw her…” Membere stopes on her walk as Gerum blocks her way.

  “Stay away from us,” he utters firmly. “Asnakech, this is for you as well,” he adds, nodding as he presses his lips in thin lines. It’s clear to any one’s perception that Gerum is worried, but Membere needs to hear more of what she wants to say. He turns and sets off, following his wife, who is still mumbling while her eyes are fixed still on Membere. It’s almost like she is half dead, but she is fighting to remain, that she has something important to share with Membere. She wants to talk about Adha but it’s clear she isn’t in her calm state of wellbeing to have any types of conversation.

  “Gerume…” Mrs Asnakech is dead worried, but she is not getting a chance to speak ever since Mr Gerum arrived. The only thing she is intitled to is to keep sobbing and not even as loudly.