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Authentic Gravitas

Page 28

by Rebecca Newton


  and gratitude, 141, 156

  identifying strengths, 147–52, 156

  nerves and anxiety, 141–47, 156, 241n20

  power stress, 152–56

  practices for dealing with, 155–56

  rejection, 135

  See also negative self-talk

  Hackman, J. Richard, 139–40

  happiness and wisdom, 129

  humility

  in collaboration, 206, 220, 225

  and generosity of spirit, 36

  intellectual, 131, 134

  of those with gravitas, 26–27, 29–30, 225

  idea generation, 168–72

  If I Could Tell You Just One Thing (Reed), 19

  IMPACT model, 57–81

  advocacy (focus on memorable messages), 58, 69–71, 80

  balancing clarity and curiosity, 79

  content, 58, 72–79, 81

  insight, 58–60, 80, 236n1

  motivation, 58, 60–64, 80, 236n7

  perception, 58, 64–69, 80, 236–37n9

  practices for leading the room, 80–81

  See also technique

  imposter syndrome, 21

  incivility in the workplace, 50–51

  influence, 181–203

  by apprising, 189

  via coalitions (forward influence), 195–97, 200

  and collaboration, 211

  by consulting, 193–94, 196, 200

  defined, 181

  by exchange, 189

  executive, 182–85

  by favors, 188–89

  by ingratiation, 193, 196

  by inspirational appeals, 189–93, 196–97

  by legitimating tactics (invoking someone’s authority), 187–88

  vs. manipulation, 185

  need for, 182

  on peers, 183–84, 198

  practices for, 202–3

  by rational persuasion, 185–87, 190

  target assessment, 184, 189, 198

  techniques, application of, 196–97

  techniques, overview of, 184–85, 201–2

  in unplanned encounters, 197–200, 202–3

  in virtual contexts, 200

  information overload, 69–70, 77

  ingratiation, 193, 196

  insight, 58–60, 80, 236n1

  inspirational appeals, 189–93, 196–97

  integrity, behavioral, 11, 17, 21

  intellectual humility, 131, 134

  intentional impact

  clarifying your intention, 34–35, 37

  gaps in, 9–12, 30, 34, 37, 54, 223–24

  gaps of others, graciousness about, 97–98, 217

  practice for building, 31

  professional footprint, 10–12

  interested vs. interesting people, 69

  Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 65

  Ketait, Samya, 210

  Klofstad, Casey, 91

  Kouzes, Jim, 192, 243n9

  Lawler, Edward E., 211

  Lawrence, Anne T., 60

  Lawrence, Paul R.: Driven, 60–61

  leadership

  active vs. passive, 108–9

  change, 194

  collaborative (shared), 208–12 (see also collaboration)

  effective, and versatility, 159

  forceful/enabling vs. strategic/ operational, 159, 242n1

  impact of, 36

  intent of, 36

  laissez-faire, 109

  leader–follower relationship, 234n12

  professional footprint, 10–12

  servant, 234n12

  social intelligence, 159

  taking ownership/responsibility vs. waiting for a title, 26–28, 224

  transactional, 108–9

  transformational, 109

  See also self-leadership

  leading the room, 5, 12

  See also IMPACT model

  learning, deliberate vs. experiential, 125

  legitimating tactics (invoking someone’s authority), 187–88

  Lerner, Jennifer, 37–38

  listening, 36, 48, 153, 235–36n13

  manipulation, 7

  meetings

  ad-hoc, 67–69

  beginnings and endings of, 73–75, 81, 99–100

  intention-impact gap in, 35, 54

  nervousness about, 142–43

  personalizing, 76–77

  preparation for (see IMPACT model)

  scripting the content of, 72–75, 81, 87

  small talk during, 75–76

  storytelling in, 78–79

  30-minute, 42–43, 55

  mentors, 127–28, 134, 154

  Miller, William I., 18–19

  mind-set, growth vs. fixed, 138–39

  motivation, 58, 60–64, 80, 130, 224, 236n7

  negative self-talk

  about authenticity, 15

  about confidence, 19, 21

  contending with, 135–41, 156

  about credibility, 22

  overview, 135–37

  about peers, 216–17

  and performance, 138–39

  vs. positive self-talk, 136

  practices for dealing with, 156

  reframing, 139

  nerves and anxiety, 141–47, 156, 241n20

  newcomer experience, 120–21

  Nohria, Nitin: Driven, 60–61

  Nonaka, Ikujiro, 129–30

  Nuijten, I., 234n12

  OCB (organizational citizenship behavior), 196

  O’Toole, James, 211

  pace, 163–68

  passion, 147–49

  PEA (positive emotional attractor), 154–55

  peers

  competitiveness among, 217

  disagreements with, 216–18

  influence on, 183–84, 198

  Pentland, Alex (“Sandy”), 197–98

  perception, 58, 65–69, 80, 236–37n9

  personality types, 4–5

  persuasion, 185–87, 190

  phoniness, feelings of, 21

  positive emotional attractor (PEA), 154–55

  Posner, Barry, 192, 243n9

  posturing, 7

  powerful vs. powerless language, 84–86, 99–101

  power stress, 152–56

  presentations

  beginnings and endings of, 73–75, 81, 99–100

  intention-impact gap in, 34–35, 52–54

  nervousness about, 142–43

  personalizing, 76–77

  preparation for (see IMPACT model)

  scripting the content of, 72–75, 81, 87

  storytelling in, 78–79

  productivity and group cohesion, 197–98

  professional chemistry. See influence

  professional footprint, 10–12

  questions, open, 44–46

  Rath, Tom, 148

  rational persuasion, 185–87, 190

  Reed, Richard: If I Could Tell You Just One Thing, 19

  reframing situations, 150–51, 156

  rejection, 135

  role-playing, 69–70, 79

  rudeness, 50–51

  Sander, D., 5–6

  self-awareness, 10–11, 143–44, 159–60

  self-efficacy, 17–18

  self-importance, 4, 7, 224

  self-leadership, 107–34

  commute time, 123–24, 134

  curiosity through busyness, 120–22, 133

  defined, 108

  developmental relationships/mentors, 127–28, 134

  expressivity linked to, 109

  gravitas game plan, 115–20


  important but not urgent tasks, 121–22, 133

  inspiring greatness in others, 126–27

  intellectual humility, 131, 134

  mind-stretching routines, 130

  overview, 107–9

  performance linked to, 109

  practices for, 133–34

  Pregame Thinking Time, 116–17, 133

  prospection, work-related, 123–24, 134

  the Reactive Rule, 117–18, 133

  reading, 122–23

  reflection, 125, 134

  Routines of Exceptions (making excuses), 110, 133

  and self-regulation, 110

  self-talk, 136 (see also negative self-talk)

  tendency to deliver as soon as possible, 118–19, 133

  thinking, free-flow, 111–13

  thinking, strategic, 113–15, 133

  wisdom, 128–32, 134, 240n28

  self-regulation, 11–12, 110

  self-talk, 136, 147

  See also negative self-talk

  seriousness, 4, 224

  The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People (Covey), 121

  Shapira, Allison, 87

  small talk, 44, 75–76, 103

  Soane, Emma, 12

  social intelligence, 159

  social isolation, 52

  Solomon’s Paradox, 131

  source likeability, 190

  speeches. See IMPACT model; presentations

  storytelling, 78–79

  strengths, 147–52, 156

  Strengthscope model, 148–49

  Takeuchi, Hirotaka, 129–30

  target assessment, 61–63, 80, 162, 184, 189, 198, 236n7

  technique, 58, 83–106

  message “fit,” 88–90, 106

  natural style vs. authenticity, 86–97, 101

  practices to develop, 105–6

  silent messages/body language, 98–101

  sitting/leaning in, 98–99

  See also body language

  Thatcher, Margaret, 90–91

  thinking

  free-flow, 111–13

  strategic, 113–15, 133

  threat response, 49

  TMT (top management teams), 166, 206

  trait self-control, 124

  trust

  affective vs. cognitive, 219

  collaboration built on, 218–19, 221

  seeking out confidantes, 140–41

  as willingness to be vulnerable, 23, 47

  value

  banner values, 192

  and behavior, 63–64, 236n7

  gravitas as the value you bring, 5–6, 224

  and inspirational appeals, 191–93

  as reciprocated, 49

  silent messages of, 46–52, 235n13

  van Dierendonck, D., 234n12

  voice pitch, 90–92, 106

  vulnerability

  in adapting your style, 171

  in collaboration, 208, 220, 225

  power of, 78

  and trust, 23, 47

  Walker-Wise, Charlie, 145

  Water Cooler Effect, 198

  Westpac Group, 35–36

  Zander, Benjamin, 1

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  ABOUT THE AUTHOR

  Rebecca Newton, PhD, is an organizational and social psychologist and Senior Visiting Fellow at the London School of Economics and Political Science in the Department of Management. She has spent the past two decades researching and teaching on leadership, communication, professional development, organizational culture, change, and management practice. Newton is the CEO of CoachAdviser and has twenty years’ experience advising and coaching business leaders and teams in organizations around the world. She writes for the Harvard Business Review, was formerly a Visiting Fellow at Harvard University, and has facilitated executive education for the University of Cambridge. Originally from Sydney, Australia, she lives in London with her husband and three children.

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