Absolution (Disenchanted Book 3)

by L. D. Davis

  “Hmm?”

  “Did anything happen between you and Celia?”

  Celia was the last person I wanted to talk about while I lay naked in bed with Lydia, but it made sense that she would have questions.

  “No, nothing happened between us.”

  She looked over her shoulder and met my eyes in the semi-darkness. “From the looks of it, you guys spent a lot of alone time in that room.”

  I nodded slowly. “We did spend a lot of time in there, but I promise you, nothing happened between us. We spent a lot of time talking, or not talking. Sometimes we sat in companionable silence and did our own things.”

  “But you would sometimes hold her, wouldn’t you?” Her soft tone held a note of accusation in there, but I did not blame her for that. She had every right to be upset.

  “Yes,” I admitted. “She cried often. I used to think it was for my brother, but now…I don’t know.”

  I was bothered on two accounts. One, because I really didn’t know why Celia had cried all those tears on my shoulder night after night, and two, because I was bothered that I didn’t know when I shouldn’t care at all.

  “She deserves an Academy Award for being able to cry on cue like that,” Lydia stated bitterly.

  I was quiet for a moment. I could have chosen to keep my thoughts to myself regarding Celia, but I never wanted to keep anything from Lydia again, especially any thoughts about my ex.

  “I think some of her tears were…dramatic, but those nights in that room…I am not so sure they were not real.”

  “Then what was she crying about? Her marriage to Massimo didn’t even exist, and when she was talking to me about you, she didn’t mention him at all. I don’t think she was pining over him in any way.”

  “I think she cried about a lot of things. She and Massimo were not together and had not been for a long time, but I think she cared about him. I also think she cried for herself, and for other things.”

  “Or she just cried so she could rub her stupid face all over your chest,” Lydia retorted.

  I chuckled and kissed the side of her face. “Maybe that.”

  We were silent for a few minutes, each of us in our own heads before she asked another question. “Can you tell me what happened with her after I left Italy?”

  “It’s a long story.”

  “We seem to have the time,” she responded sarcastically.

  I had known for some time she would want to know eventually, and with Massimo’s relocation just around the corner, and Celia to arrive on his heels, it was as good a time as any to tell her.

  “Before I knew you were gone, Celia rushed into my office in hysterics to tell me that Massimo had left the hospital and gone to Tessa’s. I didn’t understand what was happening. I had so much on my plate because of Project Home, and the fight with you, and the arguments with my parents. I went to Tessa’s and behaved rather poorly, I must admit. I saw my brother there with her, saw Daniel and the family resemblance. He was practically the spitting image of my brother, and I had not noticed before. Naturally, I assumed the worse and didn’t give them the chance to explain.

  “Back at the house, Celia acknowledged she knew about Daniel. She didn’t want to live with the humiliation that would bring to her and the children if she stayed in Lecco, so she tried to convince me to take her back to America right away. I told her that I would help her get there, but especially after what had happened between the two of you, I couldn’t just bring her home with us. That was when I found out you were gone. I believed her when she told me, but I still ran throughout the house searching for you. My mother confirmed it, but when I told her about Massimo, she responded strangely. In the end, I had to go talk to my brother again.”

  “And he told you they were divorced, right? That they had been divorced for years?” Lydia said, rolling onto her back so she could look at my face.

  “You knew before I did.”

  Exasperated, she rolled her eyes. “Yes, idiot. I tried to tell you, but you didn’t want to hear it. You were such an asshole.”

  I didn’t deny any of it. “What else do you already know?”

  “I know the twins aren’t Massimo’s biological children, but I don’t know who the father is. I just know he was married.”

  “Then you also don’t know how far back Celia’s deception went.”

  Her eyebrows rose. “How far back did it begin?”

  “All the way back,” I said solemnly, and then I told her everything I learned that night about Massimo, Celia, and Paolo.

  When I finished, we both lay there for a long time in silence as she absorbed it all. I had managed to avoid thinking too hard on any of the details over the past months, but by telling the story, old wounds were opened. I was hit by a confusing mix of emotions. I was still angry with Celia for misleading me and the things she’d done to try to maneuver her way to what she thought was a secure station in my life, but I was also hurt she had taken advantage of my affection for her, and the worst emotion of all was the pity I felt for her.

  “I really hate her,” Lydia said finally. “But I also feel sorry for her.”

  That surprised me. “Really? Why?”

  “She was really young when Paolo started to pursue her and manipulate her. Her parents sound like a nightmare, and you said yourself you don’t know the extent of the abuse. Is it possible those relationships with these adults altered who she might have otherwise been? Maybe she never really had a chance to be anything else but the devious and bitter person she turned into. I know Massimo was probably a good husband to her, but he didn’t love her, not really. Not like a woman should be loved in her marriage. I know how that feels, how that changes a person. The more I think about this, the more I think she’s lost and broken. In her mind, no one loves her. No one wants her. She isn’t good enough, and as long as her mother stays in her life, she may never be able to really breathe and find herself.”

  I was quiet again, letting her words sink in, words that made more sense to me than I wanted to admit. Lydia put my mixed-up feelings for Celia into words. I also felt bad for her, ached for the injuries she’d received from others, and those that were self-inflicted.

  “I haven’t forgiven her for anything she’s done,” Lydia went on to say, yawning. “And I don’t know if I ever will, because regardless of how she came to be who she is now, she is responsible for her own actions. As an adult, she had choices, and she chose what she chose.”

  She yawned again and turned on her side. I moved in close to her, pressed my chest against her back and once again put my hand on her belly.

  “Goodnight, Tesoro. I love you.”

  “Goodnight. I love you, Marco.”

  As I listened to Lydia’s breathing slow, I was grateful that out of all the choices she could’ve made, in the end, she chose me.

  Chapter Thirty-two

  Lydia

  I’ve been thinking about how the actions of one or two people can drastically alter the projection of the lives of many. If you and Gavin had never happened, I may have never met Lily. I wouldn’t have that beautiful baby girl upstairs. In fact, Lydia, I am certain that I wouldn’t be alive right now.

  Those words my brother-in-law said to me months ago were with me as I came slowly awake. They sounded suspiciously like words of fate, something I wasn’t sure I ever really believed in. Fate would mean that I had little control over the course of my life, which didn’t sit well with me, but what Kyle said rang true. The series of events that brought him and my sister together seemed more than coincidental, but not necessarily intentional. One could argue that because they overcame many obstacles and found their happily ever after, that fate was a factor. On the other hand, maybe it was just a hell of a lot of hard work.

  See, I had a hard time believing in fate or destiny, particularly because of all the suffering in the world. What my family endured after Gavin’s death was like Disneyland compared to the lives of others, but I was very much aware that if our lives hadn’t tak
en the turns and ups and downs that they’d taken, we wouldn’t have Marco Mangini. I loved Gavin, and that would never change, but if he had lived, and even if he’d opened up to me like he’d wanted to, I honestly believed I would have never loved him the same way I loved Marco. In that same vein, I didn’t believe he could have loved me as consumingly as Marco loved me.

  I’d missed Marco so much, more than I realized. Last night was the first time in ages that I’d felt whole. Hope was what I’d felt months ago before our world flipped upside down, but it wasn’t hope I felt now. It was confidence, a one-hundred-and-ten percent certainty that everything was going to be okay, more than okay. We were going to be perfect. I didn’t know if our relationship was kismet, but it felt right. Laying in his arms made me think I was exactly where I supposed to be.

  As I went all deep in my own head about destiny, Marco slept on. Usually, he was the early riser, up before the sun and accomplishing much before the rest of the family began to stir. He must’ve been very tired to sleep so late, which made me wonder just how busy he’d been recently, and if he’d been getting the rest he needed. Waking up to him every morning was something I could get used to again, something I could do every morning for an eternity.

  My fingers itched to touch him, that masculine jaw beneath a growing beard. His long, Grecian nose and his soft, kissable, and slightly parted lips. I wanted to stroke his long, dark eyelashes, trace the outline of his ear, and put my fingers in his silky hair, but I didn’t want to wake him. For a few minutes, I just wanted to enjoy the view of his peaceful slumbering face.

  “I feel you staring at me,” he murmured.

  I caressed the bridge of his nose. “You’re tired. You never sleep this late.”

  “First time I have been able to sleep well in a very long time.”

  “Why?”

  His eyes opened and focused on my face. “I cannot sleep without you, Tesoro. I cannot taste food. I can barely breathe.”

  My heart warmed, but I smirked at him. “I suppose you better keep me around then. I wouldn’t want you to wither away.”

  He partially sat up, leaning on his elbow. “Listen, I know I said I will come home, and I will. I promise, but I have to take a trip to South Jersey after the appointment. There is a townhall type meeting in the town where I am trying to develop Project Home. I want to be there to answer any questions or respond to any concerns. I also have a large operation here in the city that I need to focus on, and half a dozen other sites to follow up on. With Massimo and Tessa arriving in a week, I need to do as much as I can now, because I am going to take a few days off once they come.”

  I was disappointed, but I knew he was a busy man. He was trying to grow his business and at the same time keep it from suffering any further. Lily recently told me that before he met me, Marco worked constantly. He had enough people working for him to help carry the load, but he’d insisted on having a presence in everything Mangini Development did. Once he’d started seeing me, he’d began to delegate more. When we first started dating, he’d traveled often, but he hadn’t been doing that lately. No one said it, at least not to me, but I had a feeling that my family had been a distraction, and that was one of the reasons his biggest project was slowly sifting through the cracks. The time he’d spent in Italy was most likely a factor as well. So, I wasn’t going to complain because he had to work. For the first time, I stopped thinking about just me and what I had going on. Marco had a lot more to handle than me.

  “Okay,” I said with a nod. “So, when will you be home?”

  He sighed, his mouth in an apologetic frown. “Friday night. Maybe as late as Saturday morning. It will not always be this way, but sometimes I will have to be away for a few days at a time, especially during the warmer months.”

  That sucked, but again, I didn’t want to add anything more to what he already had to handle. So, I nodded again. “Okay.”

  His eyebrows lifted. “You are taking this much easier than I anticipated. Just last night, you told me you wanted me to come home.”

  “Yes, I want you back at the cabin, but what I meant is that I wanted you to come back to me. It sucks, but it is what it is. This isn’t just a job for you. It’s not just a career. It’s your life. You’ve been building this company for half your life, Marco. I understand that it will often take you away and keep you busy.”

  There was relief in his eyes. “Thank you for understanding,” he said meaningfully. He caught a few strands of my hair between his fingers. “Your hair is so long. I can’t believe how much it has grown.”

  “Do you like it?”

  “I love it. I also loved having my hands tangled in it last night.”

  I grinned. “That was pretty hot. You know what else was pretty hot?”

  His morning erection pressed against my thigh and his lips touched my bare shoulder. “Tell me.”

  “When you called me your wife when you abruptly ended your phone call.”

  He paused and met my eyes, his face serious. “I said that?”

  I nodded. “You don’t remember?”

  “No. I was distracted by your mouth around my cock.”

  “It was incredibly sexy. You sounded very possessive.”

  His hand slipped to the back of my neck. “Do you want to be possessed?”

  I placed a sensuous, short kiss on his lips. “Only by you. But…”

  His brow rose. “But what?”

  I reached for his erection, wrapped my fingers around it’s considerable girth, and squeezed.

  “I want to possess you in return.”

  With a soft growl, Marco kissed me deeply before making me roll to my side with whispered, hurried commands. His fingers stroked down my spine, making me shiver. He pressed his chest to my back and gently put a hand around my throat. I was ready and aching for him when he entered me from behind and set a slow, steady, but deep pace. As he spoke to me, his hand tightened slightly on my throat.

  “You are mine. Now and forever. All of you, Lydia. Body and soul. All mine. My wife.”

  I came, crying out his name and reaching behind me to dig my nails into the flesh of his thigh. The alarm on his phone blasted, but we ignored it. It was just background noise compared to our moans and groans, and his name on my lips.

  We’d taken our time making love, but afterward, we had to rush to make the sonogram appointment on time. We had an argument that Marco won, which resulted in me leaving the apartment with the stupid cane. I threatened to beat him with it, but he just laughed and kissed my cheek.

  Outside of the obstetrician’s office, he pulled me aside instead of going through the door. His blue eyes were bright and earnest as he held my arms.

  “Lydia, I have been thinking about this all morning. I don’t want to know the genders of the babies. Not yet.”

  “What? You can’t be serious.”

  “I am very serious. I know before I said I didn’t want one of those parties, but I change my mind.”

  I blinked slowly. “You want a gender reveal party?”

  His smile was infectious. “Yes, I do. It seems exciting. I want to do every special thing there is to do during this pregnancy and after. You said yourself you have done this before, but I haven’t, and you were not under the best circumstances before. Now, we are together. We want each other. We love each other. This should be an exciting time for both of us. So, yes. We should have a gender reveal party, and a baby shower, and birth announcements and—”

  “Okay,” I laughed, putting my free hand on his face. “Okay. We will do a gender reveal.”

  His hand came up to cover mine. “And soon, we will go shopping for the nursery, which will be in the room you are vacating as of today.”

  “And where will I be sleeping from now on, Mr. Mangini?”

  He pulled my hand away from his cheek and kissed the palm. “With me. Always.”

  Chapter Thirty-Three

  A few days after my brief meeting with Hadley, I started to really dig into the notes she
’d given me. There were demographics for the five New York boroughs, data about healthcare and education, and the links between them. There were so many kids that didn’t have health insurance, but what was just as bad was that there was a shortage of primary care providers in several areas throughout the city. Heartbreakingly, hundreds of thousands of kids were food insecure, meaning daily they lacked the proper amount of food. As Marco had pointed out last year at the Herrington party where I’d first met Hadley, lack of nutritious food and lack of medical care went hand in hand. To take that even further, a hungry and less healthy child was going to struggle in school much more than a child who didn’t have those problems.

  I grew up poor, but I’d been very lucky. Sure, we had some low periods, like having our electric shut off a couple times. I specifically recall days when my mom had to scrounge the couch and car for change so she could afford groceries or to put gas in the car. My sister and I shopped from the clearance racks at K-Mart when times were good, but most of our clothes as kids were purchased at secondhand stores. Things were hard, but we were never hungry, and we had regular medical and dental visits. Mom, Shawna, and Cliff made sure of it. We were fortunate, but too many kids weren’t. I called Hadley that night, and after a long conversation, I agreed to attend their next meeting.

  Marco surprised me when he came home a couple days early. The first thing he did in front of all the kids and his sister was kiss me until I was dizzy. Other than Gav’s comment about us being gross, no one commented on that, or the obvious change in our relationship. Before, we went through life barely acknowledging each other in passing, but now there were soft touches, embraces, tender kisses, laughter, and smiles. We still argued, but even that seemed right. The kids and even Sofia seemed happier as well. I hadn’t realized the stress our tension had put on them until I didn’t see it anymore.

  I did move out of my room, but I didn’t move into the hot guy’s room next to mine. Marco hadn’t bothered to try to spare my feelings when he told me why that wasn’t a good idea.