by Emma Hamm
And for the first time in her life, Jane prayed.
She had never been a woman that believed entirely in the Gods. There were too many bad things that happened to good people. It made little sense that they were forced to go through such hardship if someone was looking out for them.
So she spent much of her life ignoring that it could be a possibility. But in this moment as the globe at her feet slowly dimmed, Jane didn’t want to feel so alone. She needed to believe that Ruric would survive.
She bowed her head and murmured to whoever was listening. She asked for the guidance to do what was needed. She asked for the strength to remain here until she was no longer needed. She asked for the kindness of the Gods to look after her siblings that were never far from her thoughts.
Over and over again she whispered the same prayers. They echoed in the cave, soft words that she hoped were not falling upon deaf ears. Perhaps the Gods were listening.
Time passed. She did not know how long she spoke or how long she sat with her hand on the edge of the hammock. Her fingers barely skimmed the heated flesh of his arm, yet Jane wanted him to know she was there. Throughout the fever, throughout the chills, she sat as still as a stone.
“Jane?”
The murmur seemed to send a shockwave through her. The shudder spread across her shoulders and spine as she slowly looked up. She had been seated for so long in the same position that her bones seemed to creak.
“Ruric.”
She inhaled sharply, looking at him with wide eyes that he could barely see in the dim light of the globe.
“What are you doing on the ground?”
“You had a fever.” She whispered, her voice strangely hoarse.
“I do not know this word.” The way her spine was bent and the sound of her voice made him nervous. The hammock swung sharply as he moved until he was seated on the edge.
She remained between his legs, framed by his large knees.
“Among humans if you get a fever, it means you might be dying. Our bodies heat up to fight infection or disease. If we get too hot we can die.”
His mouth was dry, it made it difficult to swallow. “Goblins do this every time we are wounded. The heat helps cleanse the body.”
“What?” She seemed surprised, flinching back from him so hard she landed on her backside against the cold stone. “That was normal? Why didn’t you tell me? I was worried!”
He shrugged. “I thought you knew. I thought humans were the same.”
“We’re not.” She couldn’t fault him for assuming that they were though. She had done the same to him, thinking that he was dying when she should have considered it might just be a goblin reaction to being injured. The words were still choked when she said them though. Worry and exhaustion played havoc on her emotions.
Ruric could see the turmoil playing across her features. He knew that it was likely she was confused, angry, and probably a little guilty with herself for causing worry. He was touched that she would worry about him.
It had been a long time since anyone had worried over him. He was at fault for allowing her to feel this way and he found he did not like seeing these emotions on her face. Jane was a strong woman, that was the way he would always remember her.
“Jane,” he said quietly. In the two months that she had been here, he had come to know her well enough to understand that she wasn’t going to want him to point out her worry.
“Come.” In an echoing call to a memory of the first time they had been in these caves together, he stood slowly and held out a hand.
The first time he had done this, she had hesitated. She had never wanted to touch him. In fact, she likely had feared him. Yet this time there was no thought other than curiosity about what he was doing. Her small hand slid into his and when his claws closed down upon the delicate skin. She did not flinch away.
Jane hardly noticed the claws anymore. They were as much a part of him as her blunted nails and smooth teeth were a part of her. Touching him no longer made her feel uncomfortable. Touching him started a fire deep in her belly, made her feel the lingering heat of his palm against hers.
As though she was covered with the algae that made this place so beautiful, wherever he touched she glowed.
He guided her through the caves, past the wide eyed stares of others that looked at the blood stains on the bandages around his ribs and exposed upon his thigh. They looked again once they saw her. Her expression of enthrallment that made her eyes bigger than normal and her movements more graceful was not lost among those who were just awakening.
Their fingers remained linked the entire journey. Claws brushed gently against the back of her hand, never scratching or breaking skin. Every now and then her thumb would skate across the top of his knuckles and every time gooseflesh seemed to jump along his spine.
She protested when he moved to pull her to him once again, hooking her arms over his neck so that he could start climbing down with her. Ruric said nothing through her scolding. She warned him over and over again that he was going to hurt the wounds he had obtained just yesterday. There was no way for her to know that he would be considerably healed already.
Strong hands brushed down the soft skin under her arms, using the movement to delicately raise them to his neck. The backs of his hands skimmed down the curved lines of her ribs, lingered in the hollow of her waist.
By the time they stilled at her hips, she was breathless. She licked her lips, looking up at him with surprise. He waited for her to nod then dragged her legs up over his hips so that he could start the long climb down.
Their journey took longer than it usually would. The wounds from the stones pained him and climbing took a toll that he would not admit to. But once they were safely on the ground, he grasped her hand once more and started towards the cave.
He had not chosen to explore here often in the past few years. Not until her. It seemed right to bring her here where the light glittered along the ceiling of the cave as it reflected the bright water. He liked to see the expression of awe on her face. She found beauty in the things he had always admired. She was not afraid to show that admiration whereas he could not as a warrior.
But this trip was not about beauty. Jane had scared him just as much as he had scared her. Crawling through that small hole, he had known that he might die. Ruric had always known that he might die at any point. It was his profession to know this. He would welcome death when it came for him with open arms.
He had heard her shouting to warn him. None of the others had for they knew that if the stone was falling it would be a swift death.
If she had not started forward he would have died. Ruric had no question about that. Catching the stone had been foolish. He could have been mortally wounded and lingering upon this earth for longer than any warrior would wish.
But he had held the stone away from him knowing one thing.
She was there.
He did not want her to see him die. That memory would be too much for her and he could not die knowing that he was the one to give her more nightmares. She was plagued already with the memories of her parents and siblings. She was not yet as close to him as she had been to them, however he saw the look in her eyes every now and then.
The stone like woman that he admired was softening towards the warrior.
Bringing her here was perhaps foolish for both of them. He did not want to push her or to expose her to parts of his world that were darker than she had imagined. This place was meant to be a safe haven for the both of them. A place they could both talk without worry.
Today it would be a place of healing for the two of them. He needed to make certain that she was not harmed as well. Logically he knew she had been too far from the stones to hurt herself in any permanent way. Perhaps it was an excuse but he needed to see for himself.
They squeezed through the small opening to the cave, stopping as they usually did at the mouth once they were through. He bent slowly, his ribs p
rotesting as he took a knee in front of her.
Silence hung between them as he took off the soft leather bindings on her feet. The backs of his claws lingered in the delicate arch of each foot. Slowly he brushed his fingers over them, savoring the knowledge that she could still walk with the strength he so admired.
When he looked up at her, he saw the glowing goddess before him. “Bright one,” he murmured in his language.
His hand raised as he stood, a perfect place for her to balance herself as their footprints left glowing marks behind them. The moss glittered. A map to the movements they made.
The room was familiar to both of them. They did not need the light to guide them as they walk towards the water. Nothing was said. Both of their souls called out for the other and they only let go of their hands once their bare feet touched the water.
Blue light shimmered from the slight disturbance upon its surface. Waves of blue moved out from their ankles as they both turned towards each other.
As they always did, he reached out to pull the knot from her shoulder. But this time was different. The knot gave way to his claws, the fabric drifting lazily as it slid slowly down her arm. His fingers followed the floating path, freeing the silken fabric as he went.
When she was finally bare, she reached forward. This was also unlike their routine. He did not bathe with her. He remained always on the edges of her vision. A solitary shadow that lingered to comfort and protect.
Her palms were soft when they removed the leather from his shoulders. They glided across skin that was still slightly too warm, pausing to unbuckle the bits and pieces that fabricated the armor he always wore.
His eyes watched her avidly, watched as the expressions danced across her features. He thought, perhaps, she found him as beautiful as he found her. Without thinking he moved a leg, his foot gliding across the water so that he could have more light to see her. His eyes would always be better than hers yet there was never enough light to compete with her.
Slowly she moved, her fingers lingering up on scars that decorated his flesh. She left the bindings where they were, though he felt the barest moth like touch as she moved past them.
He inhaled slowly, the warm scent of her that seemed so familiar and yet so foreign. There was no scent of moss or green things growing on her. She smelled of warmth and sunlight, of powerful winds and gold glittering through the darkness.
Together they moved into the water. Azure burst around them, the glowing fish fluttering away from them. And in the clear water it was as though they floated in air.
Whatever silence had hung between them now sparkled with a radiance that rivaled any beauty he had ever seen in his life. They did not touch. There was more than an arm’s length of room between them. Only water separated them. They both stared at the other as though they had never seen each other before. Slowly their souls began to intertwine.
Neither would ever know who moved first. One moment there was a chasm between them and the next there was nothing but warm skin gliding against each other.
He had once told her that a goblin could not be gentle or soft. Yet, when her arms slid around his neck and the algae shimmered against her skin, it was not harsh passion that she was met with.
His lips touched hers as soft as a feather being brushed across heated skin. His hand held her to him, one against the small of her back and the other unwinding the long weave of her braid. He took his time. Gentle and loving in every move.
Jane would have imagined speed for this first time. A sense of urgency and need that would have pushed them to the limits of their control. Yet both of them breathed the other in, taking the time to learn what had been hidden for so long.
He created a curtain of her hair and she counted the bump of each rib as her hands learned the hard planes of him.
Ruric realized the differences between male and female. The valley between her hips captivated him. The rise and fall of her breasts beguiled him. The long smooth lines of her legs and the graceful arch of her neck all made him slave to her.
Somewhere along the line he pulled them both from the water to lay her down upon the moss that burst into light around her. And though his eyes were nearly blinded by the glow, he was entranced by her movements and the sounds she made.
They came together in the only way they knew how. Soft at first, delicate and kind, and eventually with a passion and desire that would later startle them both in its fervency.
Her hands learned the hard lines of his spine. His claws scraped across her thighs. They both found part of a bliss they had not realized was possible.
And in the dying light of the moss that had illuminated the cave around them, they found a happiness they had not realized was possible before the other had appeared.
CHAPTER FIFTEEN
HIS LIPS PRESSED against her shoulder, careful with his teeth as he noticed there were a few marks on her already. They had spent the day learning each other. He marveled at the taste of her. She reveled in the scent of him.
Slowly they came back to the world around them and were pleased in the discoveries they had found. The moss was their cushion once again. Throughout the day they had moved from water, to stone, to soft moss once again.
“It was not what I expected,” he said quietly as his fingers smoothed over the skin of her stomach. She was so soft compared to him, so incredibly delicate. Even though there was a hard stretch of muscle over her entire body, Ruric still knew he could kill her with a small movement.
It was strange to know that life and death were so tightly woven.
“What?” She asked, tilting her head back to look at him. A bright bloom of light echoed her soft stretch.
He did not repeat his words but instead watched the play of thoughts cross her face. He did not think that she knew how easy she was to read. Jane enjoyed having her thoughts to herself. Besides, he enjoyed being able to know what was going through her head.
“You’ve never done that before?” She asked, propping herself up on her elbow to look at him.
“No.”
“Not… Not even once?” To Jane this seemed odd. Sex wasn’t something anyone Above shied away from. She could count the number of one time lovers she’d had on a single hand, though now it was full if she counted goblins as well.
He shook his head, leaning back against the moss as she arched over him. “When would there be time? My life has been training and preparing. It takes time and effort to get to this.” He gestured between them. “I have never had time before.”
“You said you had experience though.”
A goblin grin flashed in the darkness. “I have experience in what we had done when you asked.”
She was stunned. And before she could stop herself from blurting out something foolish, she was quick to say, “But you’re very good at this.”
He seemed pleased and shrugged. “Luck?”
Jane was laughing as soon as the word left his mouth. The man claimed luck at being good the first time he ever had sex, and she couldn’t believe that he had said that. Ruric would remember this moment as the first time he had ever made her truly laugh. The kind of laugh that wrenched from her gut and filled the air with it’s bright sound.
He wanted her to laugh again until his ears rung with the sound of it.
This time it was his body that covered hers, rolling her until she was lying on her back again and he could see every smile line upon her face. “It is proof that goblins are stronger than humans.”
“Is it now?” She was still laughing, wiping at the tears on her face. “I should be glad that goblins are such quick learners.”
He hummed deep in his throat, pushing his hips against hers as he leaned down. Her neck had arched so delicately that it was calling for his lips to be pressed against her warm skin.
Slowly she stopped laughing, small hiccups of sound dying down until she could finally still beneath him. Her hand reached up to trace the lines of his face, well
known to her now in their oddities. “Where does this put us?” She asked quietly.
It was the first time in her life that Jane had asked that question. She made a rule not to wonder about those things. Men were fickle in their ways and would often run if pushed to put a label on something that might only last for a few nights. This was the first time she had truly wanted to know. The first time it meant something to her.
“The same place we were before.” He said, teeth scraping slightly against her skin.
She didn’t know whether to feel disappointed or relieved.
“Oh.” The ceiling had suddenly become much more interesting. “Alright.”
He pulled back at the sound of her voice, frowning down at her as those large eyes tried to see what she was thinking. “Why does your voice sound like that?”
The conversation was quickly turning towards something that was uncomfortable for her. She reached up to brush her fingers over his eyebrow, murmuring, “I never noticed there is color in your eyes. I always thought they were completely black.”
He nipped at her fingers, though sharp teeth making her draw back quickly. “Stop trying to distract me. Yes my eyes are colored. Why did you sound different when you said that?”
“It’s nothing Ruric, let it go.”
“Don’t make me bite you.” He leaned down to clack his teeth in front of her, chuckling when she closed his jaw with her hand.
“No biting.”
His jaws snapped once more, teasing her as he got closer and closer. She let him bite onto her earlobe before she laughed and gave in.
“Okay fine!” She pushed on his shoulder once, twice, a third time until he finally let go with those sharp teeth of his.
“I just thought that maybe this would change things. Sometimes sex makes things more serious-” her voice trailed off as she looked back at him. “Ignore me. I’m feeling sentimental.”
His hands traced the red blush that crawled up from her chest to her cheeks.