Hot Rock Star Daddy An Alpha Male Romance
Page 3
I almost sputter on the champagne.
“By the way, the champagne is non-alcoholic and there’s no reason to you to think that you’re going to do something under the influence,” He reveals and I’m slightly stunned by this news because I really did feel that the liquor was having a profound effect on me.
I look down at the glass and I should’ve known by all his talk about being sober this is not what it seems to be.
I almost did something thinking that I could blame it on the champagne in my hand. I’m a little out of my element playing in the sandbox of something unfamiliar, but my body is ready to do something about this attraction I have for him. I’m not going to risk being this close to him and throwing caution to the wind.
“I’m glad you said something, I still think it’s a good idea that we cut this evening short. I know you have rehearsal in the morning and I don’t want to keep you up any later than absolutely necessary.” I brush past him going to the door and I glance back to see something affected by my presence.
He catches me at the door, pressing me up against it making me feel trapped in a most delicious way. He moves his fingers through my hair and the tip of his tongue makes an appearance.
The tuxedo is a nice touch to get me to see him as more than a rock star with a god complex. He likes to think he has everybody in the palm of his hand, but I’m not going to give him that satisfaction.
The moment is broken when I find the door handle and pull it open. I know what he’s about to do, but I can’t give into the fire burning up inside of me. It’s not easy, but I duck underneath his arm and briskly walk down the hall without looking back. I just know I would be a goner if I turn and see him standing there motioning for me to come back.
I look at my shoes when I get to the elevator afraid of his dominance overpowering me with one look. I know I’m never going to get to sleep with visions of him running around in my mind.
I’m going to have to relieve the pressure using the hotel shower nozzle for the replacement of something flesh and blood.
Chapter 4
Raven
I’m writing madly picking up where I left off a few years ago when my creative juices were giving me more than enough material for at least three albums.
The process has been awakened by clean living and the inspiration of something that I didn’t find on the menu last night at dinner.
The band is playing familiar music and I know the words by heart because I have written them. It’s some of the old favourites, but my record label is begging me to come up with something new to feed to the throngs of the hungry press and my loyal fans.
I see the words and my muse is standing close by unaware her silence is speaking volumes. She seems like wallpaper blending into her surroundings, but she stands out with her body calling to me from across the room. I can’t help to think about her when she isn’t in the room, but she’s not the only thing on my mind.
I went through the letters after she had made herself scarce. It was rather disturbing and the black petals of a dead rose to accompany each letter filled me with a sense of dread.
“I have some new lyrics I would like to try out and maybe you could go through them and find a suitable melody to go along with them.” I’m giving my band complete autonomy and they look at each other confused until they see that I’m serious.
“This is a first and you barely recognize that we’re in the room most of the time. We’ve been trying to show you for the last couple of years that we can contribute, but you don’t want to hear of it. This new sober you scares me a little.” Benjamin is usually better at getting me to listen, but his words get lost in translation when my mind is muddled by stronger influences than his voice.
His head is shaved and he is covered in intricate tattoos. I’ve barely scratched the surface of the significance of each one.
“Don’t knock it until you try it. I’ve never felt more vibrant and alive. I’m not up late at night fielding late-night phone calls from my publicist. I don’t know why people put up with my nonsense including you and the rest of the band. They are standing there behind you trying not to say something to get me angry.” I said, apologizing without saying the actual words I’m sorry, hoping that it’s more than enough to wash away the troubles I have caused them.
Benjamin’s gives me a sounding board whenever I need it.
The boys have been with me from the moment we conceived going public with our garage band. I still remember how the neighbourhood came in droves sitting on lawn chairs in the driveway making my father scream obscenities when he came home and had to park on the road.
“I don’t want you to lose your edge. This whole thing is built on your voice and the lyrics which touch people,” He warns, but there’s no reason to heed his warning when there are forces at work beyond my control.
The soundproof environment makes it easy to go off the handle whenever I get frustrated. I have been stuck in second gear, trying my best to be the leader they expect of me, but it resulted in returning to a childhood addiction to alcohol.
I was still amazed that I started young to cope with my parent’s outbursts and screaming fits in the middle of the night.
“I have no illusions and my mind is clear. The lyrics come to me from an unsuspected source not clouded from the bottom of a bottle,” I grimace, knowing deep down this new lease on life should’ve happened a long time ago.
“This I have to see for myself,” He mocks and comes a little closer to look over my shoulder at the masterpiece in question.
“Take a look and tell me if these words don’t speak to you in a language that is universal. The only thing missing is a melody. I’m going to leave that to the rest of you to figure out. I trust your judgment and you wouldn’t be with me unless there was more to this relationship than money.” I spread out the pages and he can’t seem to take his eyes off of them.
“This is some of your best work to date. I was getting a little tired of playing the same old songs. We were actually contemplating having a frank discussion about going our separate ways, but maybe we don’t have to make a rash decision.” He’s practically drooling and I can see his mind at work with those musical notes flashing in his eyes.
“I consider you all my friends even though I probably don’t deserve it.” I’m making amends doing what it takes to show them that my attitude is changing for the better.
“I have to wonder why this change of heart, but I already know from personal experience it has something to do with a woman in your life. You can fool some of the people some of the time, but you can’t fool me.” He was using back seat psychology and peeling away the layers one at a time like an onion.
“Your psychology degree isn’t going to work on me. I would advise staying out of my head. I’m not sure that you would enjoy the visit.” I stand up, feeling this excess adrenaline running through me and I need a suitable outlet to get rid of it.
I don’t say anything and grab my black leather jacket on the way out of the door. It’s hazy and perfectly complements my mood swings. The overcast skies threaten rain, but I’ve always been fascinated by inclement weather.
I secretly believe that I would have been right at home in front of a weather map on any television station. It would be a complete departure from what I did on stage, but I would still be a part of the entertainment field in some way.
I stick my hands in my pocket and grab the black knit cap to put it on my head. It’s not to keep warm and more to disguise me from being recognized from some overzealous photographer looking to capitalize on a candid shot to put money in their pocket.
I see them approaching and they have zeroed in on their target. The cameras are coming up to their faces and they have that look in their eyes where money is the only thing they think about.
A black sports car screeches to a halt next to me and the door swings open with my daughter behind the wheel. I don’t even hesitate and jump in before she is
spinning her tires and leaving those photographers in a cloud of dust.
“It looks like I have arrived just in the nick of time to save you from a fate worse than death. I just got back into town and I thought that I would come by and take you out to breakfast.” She had something on her mind by the way that she was chewing on the bottom of her lip.
“You know you don’t have to have an excuse to come see me. I’m always glad to see you.” I can’t believe how she is the spitting image of her mother when she was younger and had all the boys vying for her affection.
“I got an interesting phone call from Quinn. She tells me that I should give you more of a chance and you have been going out of your way to become the father I can be proud of. I must admit I was a little skeptical, but it does appear that you’re making a concentrated effort,” She praises and touches my shoulder and has this look of unconditional love in her eyes.
“I’m doing my best, but I’m sure that I will run into a few roadblocks along the way. I guess I have been struggling, but I persevere because of you.” There is no temptation to drink, but being surrounded by parties and those indulging can make me sweat a little.
“I’m proud of you,” She chokes and stumbles over the words quietly whispering them most likely afraid to say it out loud.
The black sports car breezes through traffic like they are standing still. She makes me grab the dashboard and she laughs at my expense, but we both smile at the same time knowing that neither one of us would put each other in harm.
“It looks like the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree. I’ve always loved fast cars and loose…” I stop short, but I can tell from her backward glance that she knows exactly where I was going with that statement.
She twists the wheel barely missing a man down on his luck pushing a shopping cart full of recycled cans with one of its wheels shaking. He looks terrified when he feels how close he came to becoming a hood ornament.
He raises his fist and shakes it defiantly and gets a one finger salute from my daughter in response.
It reminds me of something I would do. She might be a lady in public, but behind closed doors, she can swear like a sailor on shore leave. Tamara is built from the same cloth and has my blood running through her veins. At least now, I could say that my body was a temple, but it was still an adjustment that has me waking up in a cold sweat in the morning.
“I know you’re trying to avoid this, but there’s no reason to. I’ve never gotten a phone call from Quinn and it was a little surprising to hear her voice. Is there something you want to tell me about the two of you?” She’s grilling me on my love life and I feel powerless to resist.
“We are friends and nothing more,” I gulp and fidget in my seat unable to figure out what to do with my hands.
“I think that you want more than that and there’s nothing wrong with that. She’s nothing like the other girls in your life which have paraded in and out of your bedroom. I’m trying to wipe my mind clean of those photographs taken when you are unaware of what is going on.” She is punching in a location on the GPS and soon comes to a stop in front of this Mexican food truck.
She barely has the key out of the ignition before she is bounding across the parking lot to stand in line with the rest of the sheep waiting for their orders. They recognize her and make clear the field with crumbles of dissent from the crowd before she finally waves the preferential treatment aside.
I’m not afraid of butting in front of anybody using my fame and recognizable face to my advantage. I want to do the same thing here, but my daughter is learning humility and teaching me a valuable lesson about how the public might perceive me. My patience usually wears thin, but my daughter gives me a reason to smile.
“It looks like we’re going to be here for some time. Quinn wants you. A woman knows these things and maybe you haven’t recognized the way that she looks at you when you’re not looking.” She takes my hand and I feel the love of a daughter making me well up metaphorically speaking.
“I don’t know how progressive families’ are these days, but I really don’t feel comfortable talking to you about this. I don’t need your interference and I’ve been responsible for getting my own dates since I was 13 years old.” It was a little younger than that, but I didn’t want to shine a light on it.
She doesn’t say a word, but she does grin with evil intentions making me well aware that her interference is going to happen whether I like it or not. She does give me a lot to think about.
Chapter 5
Quinn
I really did want him to kiss me slowly with time standing still, but running was my only option without making it look too obvious. There was always that subtle reminder in the back of my mind. I didn’t want to admit that I could see a future in his eyes.
His daughter is watching me and she smiles wickedly like she knows something that I don’t. I can’t expose myself and become vulnerable. The last thing I want is to give him the benefit of the doubt. My course of action has already been chosen for me.
Tamara moves a little closer until she is able to say what is on her mind without being overheard by the band.
“You have been spending a lot of time with my father outside of your usual duties. Is there something we should discuss? I’m a little too old for a stepmom, but I could be the voice to help you avoid certain topics. The one that comes to mind is my mother. That is a sore subject for both of us,” She advises and I don’t know how to respond without being a little too blunt.
“There’s nothing going on. I don’t go out of my way to mix business with pleasure. It’s counterproductive and too much of a distraction for the both of us. I appreciate your concern, but there’s absolutely nothing to report,” I said vehemently making her cock her head to the side.
“There might not be anything right now, but there could be. He hasn’t come out and said anything about it, but I sense something more than professionalism. I don’t blame you and I’m giving you my blessing to explore it a little bit further.” She’s moving to the beat of the music and the new lyrics can be heard without him screaming it at the top of his lungs.
It feels like he’s serenading me and he looks right at me making me squirm noticeably in my own skin. I don’t want to give him any false hope. Life is complicated enough and I don’t need the added complexity of getting involved with a man with no scruples.
“… The magic in your eyes…the heat that burns between us…we weather the storm in each other’s arms not knowing what the future holds.”
I concentrate on some of those words getting his undivided attention and loving every minute of it.
“… I’m looking for a shortcut to your lips and I’m desperate to get a hold of your hips. I would do anything for you. You’re like a dream when I’m wide awake. I can’t believe I didn’t see you when you are standing right in front of me. I was blind, but now I see wide. I’m awake for the first time swimming in the sea of your eyes…”
Every word is like a bullet to my heart. I feel momentarily faint and I pull at the collar of my white blouse feeling the temperature rise with every word that comes out of his lips.
Those lips are made for kissing and I came very close to succumbing to my baser instincts last night. The urge was overwhelming and the compulsion was like a magnetic force forcing me into his arms. I knew there couldn’t be lightning without the thunder echoing in my ears.
He was providing temptation, but I knew in the back of my mind those words would be shared with the masses.
“… It’s like a game show where you humor me and tell me lies. I see right through you and you expose your true intentions. I stand on stage like a nervous magician waiting for you to touch me with more than just words. I have a sure fire way of heating things up with one look.”
My whole body is craving the warmth of his fingers running down my spine. He can easily play my body like a musical instrument bringing high register moans of submission from my lip
s. I can practically feel the vibration exciting all of my senses.
My heart is pounding hard and resounding with my breathing labored. The hot flashes from his obscene poetry are in the guise of a song. He turns me into a puddle and it’s very difficult to keep a straight face.
“I don’t know about you, but a man singing like that can make a woman do practically anything. I would be very careful around him and it appears that this is his mating call of the wild. Resistance is futile.” It feels wrong for us to be discussing this while he is only a few feet away.
I’m beginning to think about what is really important. It’s a bitter pill to swallow when things are already in motion.
I never had such thoughts and he didn’t deserve any pity. The money already exchanged hands and I had no way of contacting him to stop it before it is too late. I’m still not entirely convinced this is the real man behind the curtain of the alcohol blinding him to reality.
“It’s just noise. This isn’t even my kind of music. My love is in country and I grew up on some of the old favourites like Dolly and Kenny Rogers. Old time country was what I was educated on.” The road paved in good intentions is the one that I’m following.
“I don’t know and if you close your eyes, I’m sure that you can find a few country influences. Travis Tritt comes to mind along with Dwight Yoakam. His ballads are hard for any woman to resist present company excluded for obvious reasons.” Tamara is known to delve into her tricks on the microphone to give the public exactly what they want.
I don’t want to tell her, but some of her songs talk to me. They have messages and she has become a sober influence on her father. She is getting him to come out of his shell with very little coaxing.