In His Eyes

by Barbara Lohr

  “Don’t need it. We can generate plenty of heat.” Nuzzling her neck, he worked up to her lips. This felt good, so good.

  The first kiss had a tentative edge. Lifting one eyelid, she saw his eyes were closed. Excellent. The tension in her body released. She let his lips erase any uncertainty. Felt his hands smooth away the anxieties keeping her prickly and isolated. Today they felt just the same together. The way they’d been in September, when their love was new.

  Love. The word simmered in her heat-fogged brain.

  “What is it?” Will’s eyes blinked open.

  “Nothing. Nothing.” She tilted her hips into his. Responding, he brought her closer until she groaned. “I really missed you.”

  “You did, huh?” His lips painted a trail across her cheek, halting behind one ear. Thank God for the makeup he didn’t seem to notice. “Did you miss this?”

  “Uh, huh.” Diana quivered.

  He moved lower. “How about this?”

  “My neck especially.”

  The kissing dropped lower. “And here?”

  She met his eyes. “This sweater’s heavy. Can’t really feel much.”

  Those blue eyes crinkled at the corners. “I can fix that.” Cool air teased her skin when his hands tunneled under the sweater. Everything he touched turned molten.

  “You’re so talented.” She caught one of his hands in hers. “Come on.”

  Smart man that he was, Will didn’t resist. Her room felt dark and cool. The bungalow wasn’t well insulated and tonight she was glad. “No, don’t.” She grabbed his hand when Will reached to turn on the seashell lamp.

  “Please. Let’s get through this, Diana,” he whispered. “I’d like to see you.”

  For a second she hesitated. But after all, why did she buy this expensive makeup? Time for a test ride. “Okay.”

  He coaxed her with his lips. Soothed her with his hands. While he unclasped the barrette that held up her hair, she unbuttoned his shirt and worked on his belt. Oh, so gently, he lifted her cashmere sweater, and she wiggled out of her jeans. Team effort.

  So nervous that she was shaking, Diana sank onto the bed. His eyes glowed in the fading light. No disgust, no recoiling. Her body calmed and the knot in her stomach loosened. When they came together, she loved the feel of his skin on hers. Breathed in his scent. Did what she could to hear him moan. After a bit, he flipped on the ceiling fan.

  Here they were, just like before. Diana thought her heart would burst. Will made her feel like the most attractive woman on the earth.

  The words he whispered, the way he made love to her. Nothing else mattered. Not tonight.

  ~.~

  Will studied the whirring blades of the overhead fan. After making love, they’d both nodded off. The sex had been hot. Mind-blowing. Did this qualify as make up sex? He chuckled quietly. Whatever, it had been better than anything he’d ever experienced. Maybe love was the key to great sex.

  But Diana was still skittish. Although she was in a better place by the end, he wasn’t laying the love words on her just yet. She still didn’t seem ready.

  Asleep on her side, she pillowed her head on one hand. He brushed a wisp of hair from her face. The only thing that hurt him about the fading burns was that he’d been the cause. If not for him, she would never have been in the kitchen. But the scars weren’t as bad as she thought. They didn’t seem to bother her as much anymore. What a relief.

  His thoughts circled back. Hands behind his head, he relived the high points of the past hour. God it had been hot. So. Damn. Hot.

  Hot. Will sniffed and sat straight up. Something was burning. Kicking the sheet back, he grabbed his slacks and slowly stood up, not wanting to wake Diana.

  But she lifted her head. “What is it?”

  “Do you smell something?”

  She drew in a breath. “The turkey. How long did we sleep?”

  “I’m not sure.” Damn. The floor was freezing when he sprinted out to the kitchen. Throwing open the oven door, he shut his eyes against the smoke billowing out. A smoke alarm went off with a piercing shriek.

  “Oh, my God.” Looking sleepy but alarmed, Diana followed, trailing her blue sheet. “Hot pads.” She shook a hand toward the counter.

  Grabbing the quilted mitts, he pulled the rack out. The blinding smoke stung his eyes, and the screeching alarm still rang. “Any way to turn that off?”

  “Sure. Right.” Yanking open a kitchen closet, she brought out a broom and poked the handle at the ceiling. When her sheet fell to the ground, he wished he could do something about that.

  “Will!” She waved the broom at him. “Turn the oven off.”

  He did and then heaved the heavy pan onto the stovetop.

  Unfortunately, the sheet was back in place. Diana peeked through the kitchen curtains. “It’s pitch black outside, and it looks like it’s snowing. What time is it?”

  “Five thirty.”

  “So it’s only been in the oven for ninety minutes or so, right? What happened?” They peered at the charred mess. “Don’t turkeys cook slowly? I figured we wouldn’t eat until seven.”

  “I upped the heat a little so it would cook faster.” Had he ruined their dinner?

  “How high did you set it?”

  “High as it would go. That’s how you do it, right? I did some mathematical calculations.” Made perfect sense to him.

  Diana was laughing, clutching her sides as his voice faded off.

  “Sorry, sorry. I don’t think that’s how you do it.” Grabbing some tongs, she dug a couple plastic bags from the bird. “You didn’t take out the gravy packet. Or the neck and giblets?”

  “Where did those come from?” She must think he was a total moron. When it came to cooking, maybe he was.

  Holding a dish towel underneath the dripping bags, she dropped them into her trash with a look of disgust. “These are the parts of the turkey that you take out to make gravy. You can’t cook with plastic in the bird.”

  Of course, he would have needed an ice pick to get them out. “When were they going to tell you that?”

  “Hey, don’t look like you won’t be fed.” Coming closer, she ran her hands up his bare chest. Seconds before, he’d felt cold. Her soft hands changed all that. The sheet slid to the floor again, and he moved closer. She was still toasty from bed.

  “I think this is the best Thanksgiving I’ve ever had,” she murmured, her swollen lips taking his.

  “Ditto.” Who cared about a burned turkey? He tripped over the sheet in his eagerness to follow her.

  Wagging a finger at him over one shoulder, she said, “Let me show you what happens to bad boys who let the turkey burn.”

  “Is this like being sent to the principal’s office.”

  “Could be.”

  Heat pulsed in his head, as well as parts farther south. Over the next hour or so, he forgot all about Thanksgiving. Diana had returned to her old self, playful and sexy. Oh yeah, this was a day to feel grateful all right.

  But hours later, when the moon cast blue shadows through the skylight, his stomach rumbled. Shifting onto her side, Diana said, “You must be starving.”

  “I’m fine.” He sucked in his gut.

  Diana was getting dressed. “Come on. Let’s find something.”

  He pulled on some clothes and they returned to the scene of the crime. Hands on her hips, Diana eyed the charred mess on her counter. It really was a mess. “What should we do with this? I hate to throw out good food.”

  “You sound like my mother,” he said, squeezing her waist. “Do you have a heavy duty plastic bag?”

  After he’d taken the black trash bag outside, they opened a couple of cans and perched on the kitchen stools. Diana dug green beans from one can while he spooned out cranberry sauce from another. Then they switched. She’d picked up Parker House rolls, and now she smeared them with cranberry sauce. He was still hungry and that looked pretty good. “Are you going to share?”

  “Always.” The sassy grin was back.


  “Sounds like a commitment.”

  Her blush deepened to the color of the cranberry sauce. She looked so darn pretty.

  He never knew Parker House rolls tasted this good. “Did you talk to your family today?” Will asked between bites.

  Diana nodded. “Yep. Called Grandma Kit this morning. How about you?”

  “My mother called me bright and early. She loves to cook this meal. They had a ton of people coming from church.”

  “How about your sister?”

  His stomach tightened. “Oh, no, we won’t hear from her. I’d like to strangle my sister. My mother worries about Delinda and Maisy constantly.”

  Diana glanced at the magnets on her refrigerator. “Yeah, I know how that feels. How old is Maisy?”

  “I forget. Only saw her once when she was little. Delinda married Mark when he got her pregnant in high school. They stayed in Beanblossom a while. But he was restless so they picked up and went west. Marriage didn’t last but she never came back. But enough of that.” He patted his stomach. Sure wished that turkey had turned out. Rolls and cold beans weren’t going to do it for him.

  “How about dessert?” Diana asked. “I bought a pumpkin pie from Mandy Klavis’ bakery.”

  He perked up. “I love pumpkin pie. Got whipped cream?”

  She slanted a wicked gaze his way. “As a matter of fact, I do. There was a display at Clancy’s.” Opening the frig, she took out the pie and cut two slices. After topping his with generous squirts of whipped cream, she handed him the plate. “Sorry about Thanksgiving, Will.”

  “What’s to be sorry about?” He dug into the pie and discovered the cinnamon and nutmeg seasoning was perfect. “Probably the most satisfying Thanksgiving I’ve had.”

  “Are you talking about the food?’ she teased, dotting his nose with whipped cream.

  “Not at all.” He took one swipe at his nose and kept eating.

  The wind howled outside and every window in Diana’s small bungalow rattled.

  “You need some grout on those windows.”

  “Maybe I need a handyman.” She smiled shyly.

  “Full disclosure. I’m not good with that kind of thing. But Gus, our maintenance man, is.”

  “You seemed pretty capable cutting my lawn and weeding last summer.”

  “Look, I was trying to impress you. Guess you didn’t notice I took out some of the flowers too.”

  “Nope, I didn’t.”

  “This pie is pretty good.” They were both leaning against the counter, and he fed her the next bite. With a storm brewing outside, it felt so cozy inside, just the two of them. This was way more fun than sitting around a big table, stuffing himself. Not that he didn’t love his family and the residents at the care center. He couldn’t recall another Thanksgiving when he’d felt so right with the world. All because of her. “I love you, Diana.” He could see her swallow hard.

  “We don’t know each other that well.”

  Okay, he’d take his time. “Sometimes it’s not a matter of time. It’s more about expectations and compatibility.”

  She seemed to think about that.

  Will set his empty plate on the counter. “Diana, I’m getting tired of being the only one saying what I feel. Am I in this alone?” God wasn’t that devastating? But he didn’t believe it. Not his body. Not his heart. No way.

  Her face crumpled and he felt terrible. Was she still so fragile? “Sorry. Forget I said anything.” Frustrated, he opened the refrigerator and tucked the leftover pie inside.

  “Are you leaving?” Wearing a woeful expression, she looked abandoned. He wasn’t going to do that to her.

  “Absolutely not.” Snow was plastered to the windowpanes, and the wind continued to howl. No, he couldn’t let her face this night alone. “My car’s probably covered with snow. I think I should bunk here. What do you say?”

  Her smile came slowly and the playfulness was back. “I think you’re on to something. The weather here can be fearsome. Blizzards aren’t uncommon.”

  Will wished she felt as certain about him as she felt about the snow. Ten minutes later, he didn’t care.

  Chapter 19

  He loves me. The words expanded in Diana’s heart. And Will’s face when he said them? The look of love. Oh, how much she wanted the same loving conviction. But right now she was scattered and he deserved more.

  Even though she wasn’t the same girl he’d met at the Firemen’s Ball, he loved her. How she wished that in time his words would echo in her head louder than her mother’s endless loop.

  “Beautiful girls have an easier life. And you are beautiful, Diana. Make the most of it, kiddo.” After her mother left and the years passed, Diana realized the other part of that message was, “beautiful like me.” Star’s looks had been the one thing her mother could give Diana without any inconvenience.

  Grandma Kit and Grandpa Stan were different. They handed out compliments like Halloween treats––one at a time. Even good grades didn’t win their approval as much as what she did. Actions speak louder than words. That was her grandparents when they rewarded her with words like considerate, polite or caring.

  When she found a baby bird flopping around under a tree in their yard, her grandfather helped her fix up a box.

  “Did her mama throw her out?” she’d asked, feeling so bad for the puny thing with no feathers and a huge squawking mouth. Diana was sure the baby bird was crying for her mom. Her heart broke.

  “No, sweetheart.” Grandpa had smoothed a hand over Diana’s head. “More than likely the storm last night knocked this little one out of the nest. Life can be like that. That’s why the world needs caring people like you. Why, if you hadn’t found this helpless thing, a crow or raccoon would have.” Her grandfather taught Diana how to feed the baby bird from an eyedropper. She called him Chirp. One day Grandma Kit open the sliding glass door and the bird flew out. But sometimes Diana would hear a certain warbling chirp, and she knew the bird had come to say hello.

  But now she was on her own. Like Chirp, she’d flown the nest. And recently she felt like she’d found a place that suited her. Friends to laugh with and a man to fill the empty ache in her heart. But so much had happened. She wanted her life to slow down. Wanted to heal, in lots of ways.

  The marks on her skin continued to improve, although the cold weather didn’t help. At the cottage or the store, the heat ran continually, drying her skin. When she ran her fingers lightly over her left cheek the week after Thanksgiving, the skin felt different. Harder. Her mood flattened. She wasn’t Will’s beautiful girl anymore. Not really.

  But he didn’t seem to mind. She’d been holding on so tight to what she’d always known to be true about herself. Perfection. The beautiful little girl who’d become a beautiful woman. Maybe she’d just let that go. Will still cared about her, and her friends weren’t turning away. Perfection had become a burden. Leaving it behind felt like a good idea.

  Work became her focus. In merchandising, the weeks between Thanksgiving and Christmas were really important, even in a beach town. Last year had been quiet, but she’d had a good November. Maybe Moonlight Magic had helped, and Kate Campbell had planned a Sunday Holiday Walk. Kind of like Moonlight Madness, shoppers would be enticed by sales and giveaways. Next to her register, Diana was going to set a basket of small, brightly wrapped boxes. Buy something and choose your Christmas treasure. She was deep in her wrapping project one day around five when Carolyn Knight stopped in.

  Diana waved her back to the desk. “Hey, stranger. Good to see you. Have you read the book for next month yet?” Their choice that month included a mother and daughter relationship. Diana couldn’t turn the pages fast enough.

  Carolyn shook her head. “Are you kidding? Our semester ends before Christmas. Then I have to grade all those papers before I can turn in my grades.” She did look exhausted with her hair springing from a topknot and dark rings beneath her eyes.

  “Anything new besides work?”

  Carolyn shrugged. “N
othing much. My grandmother, who lives in Santa Fe, had a bad fall. My mother wants me to go out there over the holidays.”

  “You must be so worried.” After her experience with her grandfather, Diana knew older people sometimes needed a lot of help.

  “So, you’ve heard about Kate?” Carolyn was good at changing the subject.

  What was this? “No.” She watched Carolyn’s smile fade.

  “Oh, Diana, I thought you knew. Kate had a miscarriage.”

  The package slipped from Diana’s hands. “What happened?”

  “Who knows? They’re devastated.” Carolyn shivered. “I wonder if she’ll be at book club.”

  How her heart ached for Kate. She had been so excited about her pregnancy. “I hope so. We can all give her a big hug, not that it will fix anything.” Diana’s recent problems seemed minor compared to Kate’s loss.

  “Right. Hard to know what to say.” They stared at each other with empty eyes.

  “I can’t imagine how she feels.”

  “I know, she was so happy. And we were going to have that baby shower. Well, back to my exams. See you at book club, Diana.” Carolyn left but the weight of her news had darkened the day. Diana was glad when it came time to turn out the lights and go home.

  When Will called that night, she shared the sad news. Their relationship had settled into a calm steadiness she’d never known before. She heard from him every day. Just listening to his voice relaxed her. While he talked, she listened to her heart. With every beat, it seemed to say I love you. But he didn’t say those words again, as if he were waiting.

  “Poor Cole,” Will said quietly.

  “What about Kate? Imagine how she feels.”

  “Oh, I feel terrible for Kate. Losing a baby, well, I can’t even imagine. But for Cole, how will he comfort her? That man’s got a big job ahead of him.”

  Was Will talking about himself? He’d felt awful about her accident and blamed himself. How could she make it easier on him?

  ~.~

  The news about Kate and Cole ripped through Will’s gut. Sure, his job often involved comforting families. Bereavement counseling. But usually the loss involved an elderly family member who’d had a full life. Kate and Cole were just starting out. As always, Will transferred it to himself. He was just wired that way. Pacing the floor in his office, he couldn’t help but wonder how he’d feel if he and Diana lost a baby.