by Caitlyn Dare
Kenny's eyes widen as my grip on her throat tightens, but I don't move. I can't. I'm too fucking broken.
"Conner," she breathes, and the sound of her soft, concerned voice shatters me.
"I fucking hate you right now, K. I fucking hate you," I seethe, but my actions betray my words as my lips slam on hers and my hand releases her neck in favor of allowing my fingers to thread into her hair.
Her lips part for me instantly and my tongue sweeps out in search of hers.
The second I taste her, everything inside me relaxes slightly. It doesn't make any of it go away—my anger, my need for revenge are still there, simmering right under the surface—but she allows me to focus on something else, if only for a few seconds. She gives me exactly what I've been craving since the moment she walked out of that hotel room and away from me on the weekend.
I drop my hands to her hips and lift her until she has no choice but to wrap her legs around my waist and feel what she does to me. Even while I'm hating her, I can't stop wanting her.
I grind my hips against her pussy and a moan rips from both of us.
My hands are everywhere, caressing, squeezing, teasing, but it's not enough. It's never e-fucking-nough with Kenny.
But then I make one fatal move.
I release her lips in favor of kissing down her neck, and it gives her the time she needs to think, to process what's happening here. I know exactly when she shuts down; I feel it, and not just in the way her muscles go rigid in my hold.
Pulling my face from her neck, I look at her. Tears stream down her cheeks, her dark makeup getting washed away with them. "I can't do this, Con. I can't lose myself in you again."
"Bullshit. This is me. Fuck, K. This is us." I cup her cheeks in my hands and stare into her eyes. "I need you so fucking bad."
A hiccup erupts from her throat as she tries to keep it together, but I see the storm behind her eyes. I see her breaking apart on the inside just like I am.
"I know. But I can't."
"You can, babe." I drop my forehead to hers. "It's just me. Just me and you."
"Yeah, but when I walk out of those doors, it won't be. It'll be me and him, and I can't, Conner, I just can't." Her voice cracks, and I know that I've lost her.
Reluctantly, I allow her legs to drop until she's taking her own weight once more and I step back. It fucking rips me apart inside to do so, but this isn't just about me.
A roar rips from my throat a second before my fist slams into the locker beside her head.
She screams, and all the fight leaves me.
"Shit, K. I wouldn't," I shout.
"I know," she says sadly, “you just startled me. "I... uh..." She looks over her shoulder at the door, and I swear to God my world stops spinning. "I really need to..."
"Go back to him," I finish for her.
"It's not like that, and you know it."
"Do I?" I sigh as she starts to back away from me. "I love you, K. I fucking love you."
"I know." Those two words gut me. The fact that she doesn't say it back shreds me to fucking pieces.
I watch her go, but the second she has her hand on the door, ready to push it open, I stop her.
"Wait." I push my hand into my pocket and pull out something I’m sure will mean nothing to her. "Here."
I drop the small origami flower into her hand and then turn and walk away myself, knowing that I can't bear to watch her do it to me.
Chapter Eleven
Kennedy
“Feeling better?” Warren asks me the moment my eyes open.
I take a second, pressing a hand to my stomach. “Still a little nauseous.”
I hadn’t even had to lie.
When Shelbie had dropped me off at the trailer yesterday, I’d spent almost two hours puking into the Kravens toilet bowl. That’s how Warren found me.
I blamed the school’s Taco Friday. Surprisingly, he bought it. He’d held my hair back and then stripped my damp clothes from my body, lowered me into the tub, and washed every inch of my skin. I was too weak to argue. Too broken to fight off his touch when he slid his fingers between my legs and made me come.
But the guilt came thick and fast, and he’d barely gotten me to the bowl before I puked again. By the end of it, I was so weak I could barely stand. Warren tucked me into bed with a hot water bottle and some ice chips and let me sleep.
Only, sleep didn’t find me. I lay there, pretending. It was easier than trying to keep him at arm’s length.
I couldn’t do it, not after seeing Conner. Not after hearing the pain in his voice and feeling the anger in his kiss.
He hates me.
Conner hates me, and I don’t blame him.
But I also know he loves me. That’s why he’s hurting so much. Because I’ve broken his heart.
I’m a fucking mess.
But I can only pacify Warren for so long. He’s already growing skittish. Soon he’ll want me to prove my loyalty with not only my words but my body. And I’ll have no choice but to obey.
Because Conner confirmed what I already knew—Warren has the Jaggers running scared.
“Why don’t you have the morning in bed? I want to hit the gym and run a few errands. We’re going out tonight, so you need to feel better.”
“Out?” The hairs along the back of my neck tingle.
“Party at Macker’s place.”
“A party? I’m not sure—"
Warren’s brow quirks up, and I swallow my protests.
“I’m sure I’ll feel better by then.”
“I’ll bring you one of those iced latte things you like.”
“Thanks.” Because iced latte fixes everything.
He brushes the stray hairs from my face, gazing down at me as if I’m the most precious thing in his world. “I love you, baby. Everything I do is for you, you know that, right?”
“I know.” The words gut me.
“Okay.” He leans in, kissing my forehead. “Rest up, and I’ll see you later.” Warren climbs out of bed and pulls on a t-shirt.
I wait for him to leave, burying my face in the pillow the second he does.
A party?
I don’t want to go to a party. Least of all at Kian Macker’s house. He graduated last summer with Warren and is the closest thing he has to a friend. But he’s a real creep. Throws these parties out at his house that overlooks the ocean. He isn’t rich by any means of the word, but money comes easy to a guy with zero morals and connections in all the wrong places.
I could run. I could pack my sparse belongings into a bag right now, steal some of the cash I know Warren keeps in an empty tin in the food cabinet, and go.
But I can’t risk him assuming I’d gone back to Conner. And even if he knew I hadn’t, I wouldn’t put it past Warren to punish Conner and the Jaggers anyway.
I’m stuck here.
So long as Warren is alive and breathing, I have no way out.
Tears sting my eyes, but they don’t fall. My armor is already strengthening, sliding into place around my heart. Warren can take my body, he can use me as a punching bag and try to break my spirit, but he will never have the one thing he truly craves.
My love.
Music pumps through the house, rattling my bones. Warren keeps me tucked into his side as we move deeper into the fray.
A couple of guys tip their Solo cups at Warren, but no one tries to stop him. The air is thick with smoke. Cigarettes, weed, who knows what else. The smell is overpowering, and I lift my arm to my nose to try to breathe easier.
“Kraven, my man. You came.” Kian is sprawled out on the couch, a half-naked girl I don’t recognize in his lap, her eyes rolled back and her hips undulating as he blatantly finger fucks her.
“Hey man, you want a taste? She’s fucking dripping.”
“Nah, not right now.” Warren chuckles, yanking me closer to drop a kiss on my hair.
“She’s a pretty little thing. But I bet she doesn’t suck dick like Felicia.”
The girl moans,
too high off her face to realize she has an audience.
“Yeah, get it, Leesh,” someone yells, and the room cheers as her moans grow closer together.
Kian chuckles, nuzzling her neck from behind as he rips down her lacy tank and fondles her breasts. “Come on, man. You know you want to.” His brow lifts at Warren.
I peek up at him to find his eyes blown with lust, and my stomach clenches so violently I think I’m going to puke.
“Nah man, she’s all yours for now.” His grip on me tightens, but I can feel his hunger bleeding out of him.
Go, I want to whisper. Go fuck her and leave me alone.
But I know he won’t. Even if he does get with some other girl, he’ll always come crawling back... because they’re not me.
Warren pulls me down onto one of the chairs, wrapping his arm firmly around my waist. My skirt rides up my thighs a little. I hadn’t wanted to wear it, but he insisted. Said he wanted to show me off.
His fingers brush my knee, casually at first, but as we watch the girl lose herself in pleasure, his touch creeps higher and higher.
“Warren,” I hiss, and he chuckles.
“Doesn’t it get you hot, watching her?” he whispers against my ear. “Look at her slick pussy, babe. I could slide right in there and she wouldn’t even know what hit her.”
His fingers trace my inner thigh, and my body betrays me. His touch repulses me, but I can’t deny watching her ignites an unwelcome fire in my belly.
God, I miss Conner. I miss his touch and kiss, the way he treated me with such passion and desire. He would never force me to watch such debauchery.
But I am here, and the music is pumping through me and the weed assaulting my senses, and if I close my eyes and shut it all out and just feel... I can almost—
No.
No!
What the fuck am I thinking?
I don’t want to do this.
Snatching Warren’s hand away, I thread our fingers together. “Not here,” I say over my shoulder, forcing myself to placate him with a kiss.
The girl’s moans fill the air, her orgasm swirling around us.
“We should have some fun with her,” Warren suggests.
“I don’t share,” I snap.
“No... I guess you don’t.” There’s something ominous in his tone. Something dark and wicked.
“Drinks, man.” Another guy appears, handing each of us a bottle of beer and catching Warren’s eye for a beat. I sniff it, inspecting the contents.
“It’s just beer,” he says.
“Drink it,” Warren orders. “Mal knows not to fuck with me.”
I take a long pull, desperate for something to take off the edge. Kian has already disposed of the girl, and I spot her in the corner, snorting a bump of coke. Her drugged eyes meet mine, and for a second I see myself in her. A shudder rips through me and I drop my gaze. She’ll find no sympathy here.
I don’t have any left to give.
Warren and Kian fall into easy conversation while I sip my beer. The other guy, Mal, keeps the drinks flowing.
I try to keep an eye on what I’m drinking, but every time I stop, Warren gives me a little nudge.
A silent order.
He wants me to relax, to let my guard down.
But to what end?
Some time later, everything is a little blurry, and there’s a new girl dancing, putting on a show for Kian.
“Is that Zoe?” I ask Warren.
“Zoe?”
“Yeah, Jayden’s sister. Isn’t she like, fourteen or fifteen?” The way she’s working her body would suggest otherwise.
“Does it matter? She’s obviously here looking for a good time,” he replies dismissively.
Kian watches Zoe hungrily. I realized some time ago that this room is invite only. Kian has a guy on the door letting people in and out. There are only a few of us here, and it feels intimate somehow, like this is Kian’s den and we’re his subjects.
“You ready to play, man?” he asks Warren.
“Play?” I say, but it comes out slurred.
“Yeah, baby. I told you, we’re going to have some fun.”
“F-fun?” The icy claws of fear wrap around my throat. “But we’re having fun. We’re at the party.”
“Oh, Kennedy, so naïve.” Warren kisses the end of my nose.
“Leesh, get over here and help my guy and his girl enjoy their night.”
“W-what?” I murmur, confusion clouding my head. Everything feels wrong, like I’m underwater and can’t break to the surface.
“Warren?”
“Shh. Relax, baby. I’m going to take care of you.” His fingers slip inside me, white hot pleasure racing up my spine. I moan loudly and someone grunts, “Fuck, that’s hot.”
“Get over here, you little slut. Come kiss my girl.”
The girl from earlier stands over me, her eyes like two pinholes as she grins down at me. “I’ll make it so good.” Her mouth is on mine before I can get my head around what’s happening.
I try to resist, but my body feels lax, and Warren’s arm traps me in place as he continues finger fucking me. It feels so good... it’s not supposed to feel good.
I’m not supposed to feel like this.
One of his hands flies out and grabs her throat, and she chokes into my mouth.
“Shh, baby,” he croons into my ear. “This is all for you.”
For me?
I-I don’t understand.
But I can’t think straight, let alone piece together the puzzle Warren is spinning. I ride his hand, my body moving involuntarily as it chases the release it knows will come.
“I’m going to fuck her, and you’re going to watch,” Warren spits. “You’re going to watch me fuck her until she’s begging for me to stop, and then when I’m done, you’re going to lick my dick clean.”
He roughly grabs my chin, yanking my face around to his. “I think you need a little reminder of who you belong to, baby.” His fingers stop moving, and I let out a needy whimper as I realize that he’s not going to give me the release that’s in touching distance.
“Off,” he grits out, shoving me off his lap. I topple to the floor, and the girl practically clambers over me to climb on Warren’s lap and sink down on his cock.
“Fuck, yes,” he grunts, locking eyes with mine as I sit there, tears streaming down my cheeks.
“Let me fuck her,” Kian says, despite the petite blonde now sitting in his lap. “I’ll make it hurt,” he promises.
“Touch her,” Warren sneers, “and I’ll gut you like a fish.”
Kian lets out a maniacal laugh. “She’s off-limits, got it, man. Whatever you say. She’s good, right? So fucking tight.”
He’s no longer talking about me; he’s referring to the girl riding Warren like her life depends on it.
I swallow the bile in my throat as I try to break free of his hard stare. But he has me ensnared. Trapped. And although he’s not touching me, he’s determined to make it hurt.
“Come here.” He beckons me with a tilt of his chin, and despite the fact that I know nothing good is going to come of it, my body follows orders.
His fingers dig into my jaw and he forces me to watch him fuck the whore on his lap.
“You see that, baby? That should be yours.”
“What the fuck?” someone roars, and I glance up to find Jayden standing in the doorway, a murderous expression on his face. “Zoe?”
Her eyes widen with horror. “J-Jay?”
“What the fuck are you doing with my sister, Macker? My kid sister.”
Kian holds up his hands slowly. “She came here looking for a good time.”
“So you thought you’d just—"
“Relax.” Levi appears, his eyes catching mine. The blood drains from his face when they move past me to Warren fucking the girl as if we’re not all here.
He mumbles something to himself before turning his attention on Zoe. “Zo, let’s go. Now,” Levi barks, and she reluctantly clambers
to her feet.
“Call me,” she says to Kian over her shoulder.
“Go get in the fucking car, now.” Jayden pushes her out of the room, a chill zipping through the air when he settles his gaze back on Kian.
“Lay a single finger on my sister, and I’ll kill you.” He takes off after her, leaving Levi behind.
“You need to rein in your boy, Miller.” Kian scrubs his jaw.
“It’s his sister, man. She’s barely fifteen.”
“People know what they’re getting into when they turn up here.”
“Yeah, well next time, shut the door in her face.” Levi hesitates.
“Something else you need?” Kian asks over the sound of skin slapping and Felicia’s moans.
When Levi’s sympathetic gaze flicks to mine, I want the ground to open up and swallow me whole.
I want to go with him.
But we both know I can’t.
Chapter Twelve
Conner
"Get your ass to my house now," Levi barks down the line the second I answer my cell. Music booms in the background, telling that he's at some Friday night Heights party.
"Is she okay?" I ask in a rush. We all know too well the kind of shit that goes down at some of those parties.
"Can you get there or not?"
"Y-yeah, I'm leaving now. Tell me she's okay."
"She'll be fine."
"That's not what I fucking asked." I hang up and march to the pool house doors.
"What's going on?" Cole asks when I have my fingers wrapped around the handle.
"Nothing," I mutter, pushing the door open and not bothering to look back. I know exactly what I'll see: Hadley grinding her drunk ass down on his denim-clad cock. Lucky motherfucker. Ace isn't in a much different position either.
"We'll come."
"No," I shoot over my shoulder. "I think you've already done enough. Don't you?"
Before he gets a chance to respond, I blow through the door and allow it to slam behind me.
There was never a question as to whether I would forgive Cole for killing our 'father.' I couldn't give a shit about the man who ruined our lives, but what I can't get over right now is the fact that he lied to both Ace and me about it. As far as I was concerned, Cole and I didn't have secrets, and yet he fucking kept something so huge from me. All the while that cunt Warren has been walking around knowing all about it and planning how to fuck us up.