Forever Starts Now

by London, Stefanie

  Tim and Rudy were about as opposite as could be. Rudy was always in slacks and a shirt, jaw clean shaven—he definitely had teacher vibes. Not to mention his years playing football had given him the physique of an athlete. Tim on the other hand was fully tattooed on both arms and hands, and was usually in a leather jacket. He had a gauge piercing in one ear and dyed his naturally fair hair boot-polish black.

  But that was the awesome thing about the Roberts family—no matter what walk of life you came from, you were welcome at their table. And for the most part, everyone got along great. Amber issue notwithstanding.

  “Good to see you, Monroe,” Tim said, pulling her in for a brotherly hug. “We’re excited to meet the new man.”

  “See, even Tim thinks it’s a big deal,” Olly said from his chair where Kiara was sitting on his strong leg while loudly reciting a song she’d learned in school.

  For a minute, Monroe wondered if Ethan had any idea what he was getting himself into. In addition to the singing and the loud laughter coming from the kitchen, Harlow was grizzling because her bottle was over and the other two little girls were playing with dolls in the living room, where they could be easily watched from the table. Music started coming through the speakers carefully hidden away and Loren’s off-key singing soon followed.

  Their family was loud. Probably a reason why most of them were extroverts and they tended toward partners with that same preference—quiet people could feel a bit overwhelmed at a Roberts family gathering.

  He’ll hold his own. You have nothing to worry about.

  She wasn’t even sure why she cared. So long as their relationship seemed plausible and she could finally put her father and sisters’ minds at ease over her mental and emotional state, that was all that mattered. Then when Ethan was ready to leave town, they’d “break up” and Monroe wouldn’t be affected one little bit, thereby further proving that she really had moved on with her life.

  At that moment, the doorbell sounded and Loren’s giant yellow Labrador, Mimi, started barking like mad. There was a whoosh of golden fur and the clatter of toenails over floorboards as Mimi made a mad dash for the door.

  “I’ll get it.” Monroe scurried out of the dining area and made a grab for Mimi’s collar, hooking one finger into it so the big dog wouldn’t immediately leap onto Ethan, as was her usual style of greeting.

  When she pulled the door open, Ethan was standing there with a bottle of wine in his hands, looking like he was waiting for a GQ photographer to snap his picture. How did he look so good in jeans and a sweater? The soft fabric hugged his body and was the exact same shade of blue as his eyes. On the bottom he wore dark denim jeans and boots, and a coat was slung over his arm. As usual, his dark blond hair was rumpled and slightly curled around his ears.

  “I would complement your outfit, but you gave me a hard time about that on our last date,” he said with a sly smile. “But Goth Lite suits you.”

  She laughed and stepped back, holding a very excited Mimi in her grip. “Goth Lite, I like that.”

  “Who’s this beautiful creature?” He crouched down and gave Mimi a scratch.

  “This is Mimi, and stop scratching her or she’ll glue herself to your leg for the entire night.” Monroe laughed. “Then it will take approximately six years to get all the dog fur off you.”

  “But you’re such a gorgeous girl, aren’t you?” he cooed at the dog, and Monroe couldn’t help the goofy grin that spread across her face. So sue her, she was a sucker for a guy who loved animals. “Such a friendly, gorgeous girl.”

  Ethan stood and shut the door behind him, and Monroe was very aware of the curious eyes peering into the entryway from both the dining area and the archway leading into the kitchen. He must have sensed it, too, because he leaned in. The smell of his cologne hit Monroe as he brushed his lips against her cheek.

  Surprised by how her knees felt so wobbly all of a sudden, Monroe accidentally released her hold on Mimi’s collar. But because the dog was excited to be released—and because the polished boards were not her friend—she slipped and plowed into Ethan, sending him stumbling back against the wall and out of Monroe’s grasp, which was probably for the best.

  The last thing you need is to get hung up on how good he smells or how much you wanted that kiss to be a whole lot steamier.

  “Oh my gosh, I am so sorry.” Loren rushed over and grabbed Mimi, holding her out of trouble’s way. “Let me put her outside. She’s a little too affectionate for her own good.”

  “Where should I put this?” He held up the wine.

  “I told you not to bring anything,” Loren scolded in a way that said he’d scored major props for not listening and bringing something anyway.

  “And disappoint my mother’s memory by being a bad guest? No can do.” He smiled charmingly and Loren blushed. Monroe raised an eyebrow.

  Her sister was so totally in love with her husband that nobody had seen her blush in a long time. Looked like Ethan’s people skills were next-level.

  “You can put it on the table.” Loren herded Mimi out toward the back and Monroe took a few minutes to introduce Ethan around.

  Everyone seemed eager to meet him and in true Roberts family style, he was given a chair, something to drink, and then had questions rapid-fired at him. He took it all in stride. In fact, he soon had Olly laughing at some joke about a failed attempt to do his own plumbing and was amusing Tim with a story about a friend’s tattoo that had an unfortunate phallic aspect to it.

  “Looks like you’ve found yourself a keeper,” Taylor said as she sidled up to Monroe in the archway that connected the kitchen and dining area.

  “A keeper for now,” she replied. It was one thing to introduce a fake boyfriend to her family—which made her feel guilty enough—but she couldn’t lead them to believe it was a long-term thing on top of that. “Honestly, it’s not serious. But I’m having fun.”

  “I wouldn’t expect it to be serious. It’s not like he’s been in town that long.”

  Monroe laughed. “Does everybody know the poor guy’s movements down to the minute?”

  “That’s the quiet season for you.” Taylor shrugged. “But I’m happy you’re putting yourself out there again. So long as you’re actually letting him in.”

  “What’s that supposed to mean?”

  Despite her tough-girl looks and penchant for piercings and black leather, Taylor was the most emotional and introspective of the three sisters. She was the best ear to bend in tough times and could always offer some deep insight that would pass others by, Monroe included. The youngest Roberts sister had a gentle heart and the highest emotional intelligence of any of them.

  “It means you’ve gotten very accustomed to pushing people away,” Taylor said. “I’ve seen you do it with friends. I’ve seen you do it with guys. It’s like you’ve spent the last three years closing your circle to the smallest number of people possible.”

  Taylor had a point. A few years ago, Monroe could always be counted on for drinks and trivia nights at the Forever Falls pub. She was the one who always put her hand up to help organize baby showers and bachelorette parties and surprise birthday dinners. She’d had a close but large circle of girlfriends who were now scattered up and down the East Coast, and she used to travel away for weekends to visit them.

  After her divorce, Monroe couldn’t remember the last time she’d even thought about picking up the phone to call people or organizing a weekend away.

  “I’ve taken on a lot at the diner,” she said. “Work has been busy and I don’t have the time for lots of friendships.”

  “Especially not when those friendships require trust and you don’t hand that out so freely anymore,” Taylor said quietly.

  Monroe watched Ethan talking animatedly with her father and her sisters’ partners. Olly’s smile was so wide and so genuine it filled Monroe with the most delicious warm and fuzzy feel
ing, and Rudy’s loud, booming laugh almost rattled the paintings on the walls. It was like looking at a warped version of the past—where she had someone to love, where she had dreams and hopes and where she did let people in.

  But this was fake. No more real than a stage play with props and costumes.

  Ethan needed something from her and she needed something from him. Their arrangement didn’t have room for things like trust and vulnerability and emotion, and Monroe certainly wasn’t going to fool herself into thinking the scene in front of her was anything more than a means to an end.

  “We should round up the girls and get them fed before dinner comes out,” Monroe said, smiling like her sister’s words had no impact at all.

  …

  An hour later, as they were finishing up their meal, Monroe was marveling at how well everything had gone. Ethan praised Loren’s cooking and was doing well with all the questions. He was so good with people—charming, open, instantly likeable. She could learn a thing or two from that. Even in silence, his presence radiated, drawing her attention away from everyone and everything else.

  Maybe it was the way his knee pressed lightly against hers under the table, or the way he’d taken her hand when they were selling the moment they’d decided to “date.”

  More like the fact that it’s been years since you felt the touch of anything but your vibrator.

  Celibacy was a bitch.

  Ethan leaned over and slid an arm around her shoulders, pulling her close. God, he smelled good. Like a fresh fall breeze.

  “If you keep looking at me like that, you’re going to give people the wrong idea,” he whispered. “Or maybe it’s the right idea.”

  The rest of the table chatted amongst themselves. Monroe scanned the room to see if anyone was watching them, but Loren was getting ready to put the girls to bed and Taylor was busy teasing Tim in that flirty way that was adorable and pukey.

  “I’m not looking at you like anything,” she said under her breath.

  “Yes, you are.” He spoke right into her ear, sending a tingle of anticipation skittering down her spine. No doubt her sisters thought he was starting the foreplay early. “And you should be looking at me like you want to jump my bones.”

  “Maybe I’m a great actress?” She turned to him and lost herself in his incredible blue eyes. They were so perfectly clear they made her want to melt right into his touch.

  “Liar.”

  She swallowed, ignoring how close his lips were. If she got any closer, she’d catch them with her own. “What makes you say that?”

  His arm remained draped around her shoulder, his fingertips brushing an intricate pattern on her upper arm that made goose bumps ripple across her skin. “I’m good at reading people.”

  “Oh yeah?”

  “I knew the first time you told me I wasn’t your type, you were full of shit.”

  “You’re so goddamn cocky.” Monroe couldn’t help but laugh.

  “It’s true. I mean, we have the blushing thing, which is as subtle as a ton of bricks,” he said, and Monroe felt her cheeks heat up in response. Busted. “Nature’s lie detector.”

  “You have no idea how often that got me in trouble growing up,” Monroe said with a sigh.

  “And secondly, I caught you staring when you thought I wasn’t looking.”

  “You did not!”

  “Did so. And since we’ve progressed from pretty pink rose to red fire truck in the cheek region, I’m going to call you the world’s worst liar.”

  Monroe cleared her throat as she noticed that the conversation had died down at the table, and that everyone was watching them.

  “I should clean up,” she said to Ethan, pushing her chair back and extracting herself from his slow, deceptively sensual touch.

  “I’ll help.”

  “Please,” Loren said. “Sit. You’re a guest.”

  “I can’t let my lovely girlfriend do it all by herself.” He shot Loren a smooth smile.

  Ethan helped her pick up all the bowls and plates, and then followed her into the kitchen. Monroe could hear her sisters already giggling and whispering about how Ethan was so much better than her asshole of an ex. Low bar, for sure, but Ethan cleared it like a gazelle with springs on its feet.

  “Well, look at you winning everyone over,” she said, opening the dishwasher and rinsing off the plates before handing them to Ethan so he could slot them into the appropriate section. “Gold star, boyfriend.”

  “I didn’t really do anything much,” he replied with a shrug. “I guess that tells me all I need to know about your ex.”

  “And then some,” Monroe muttered.

  Ethan reached past Monroe to grab a plate, brushing her rib cage as he moved. “Why were you with someone like that?”

  She bristled. “This arrangement doesn’t include a free pass for you to judge me for my past romantic choices.”

  “No judgment, I’m just curious.”

  Monroe didn’t shy away from telling people Brendan was a capital-J jerk. That was the easy bit. But talking about the man she thought he was for years before that…well, that was harder.

  “I thought I loved him. I did love him,” she said with a sigh. “When we were dating and in the early days of our marriage, things were great. He was sweet, attentive. I was attracted to his ambition and drive for a better life. I thought we were working toward the same thing.”

  “But then something happened?”

  “Something changed.” Monroe sighed. She continued rinsing the plates and handing them over to Ethan. “Brendan got this itch to move away from Forever Falls. He wanted to chase his dreams in the big city and I didn’t want that. Sure, I had dreams. But I could never leave my family like that, especially not after Dad’s accident.”

  “And he couldn’t accept that.”

  “Well, I thought he did, at first. We had a few arguments about it and then he dropped it, so I figured he respected my view to at least wait, until…” She swallowed and shook her head. “God, I don’t even want to think about anything happening to my dad. But I told him while Dad’s alive I have to be here to help take care of him.”

  “And he took that as an excuse to cheat on you?”

  “I guess so.”

  Monroe turned to the sink, suddenly hit with a wave of sadness. She didn’t feel that often anymore—because she truly had moved on from Brendan. It was more sadness for the woman she used to be. Sadness that she’d allowed someone to hurt her so badly. Sadness that her family had suffered because of her mistakes.

  Sadness that she’d lost a grip on who she was.

  “It’s not your fault.” Ethan came up behind her and touched her shoulder, encouraging her to turn around.

  “I know.” Monroe tipped her face up to his, jaw set, determined that he wouldn’t see her pain. That nobody would see her pain. Or her guilt. “It’s on him.”

  “So why do you wear it like rocks on your back?”

  “I don’t.” Her denial came too quick, too unsteady. He’d called her a terrible liar and he was right.

  Ethan brushed her hair over her shoulder, toying with a rogue frizzy curl. He seemed to like her hair and was looking for any excuse to play with it. Funny, it had always been the bane of her existence. Carrot top, kids at school had called her. Fire crotch and matchstick and Raggedy Anne.

  “You’re beautiful,” he said quietly. There was something about the way he said it, low enough that maybe it wasn’t for show. For their act. Or maybe it was the way he looked at her—like he really saw who she was underneath it all. “Inside and out.”

  “Stop,” she whispered, a strange combination of emotions knitting themselves together, creating a knot of feeling inside her. “You’ve already sold it.”

  “Have I?” His expression was hard to read now—guarded.

  “Very well, I thin
k.” Her voice was husky. Want and need danced in her belly, twisting and twirling so that she had to press a palm against her stomach to quell the fluttery feeling.

  Mistake. His eyes caught the movement—caught the intent—and when he dragged his gaze back up to her face, they burned. She grappled for some way to cut through the tension, but nothing came. “It’s good for our…agreement.”

  “Right, our agreement.” He smirked, as sure of himself as a guy who was used to charming women out of their skirts. Not that he’d told her much about his life, but she could only imagine that’s how it was. “Do you remember what was included in our agreement?”

  His gaze lingered on her lips. There was no point lying. She knew exactly what he meant. “That if I asked you to kiss me then you would do it no questions asked.”

  “Is this one of those moments?”

  Her gazed flicked over his shoulder and she caught her sisters ducking back into the dining room, caught spying. “I don’t want things to get messy.”

  Messy was the thing she avoided most in the world. It’s why she didn’t date after her ex left. It’s why she didn’t want the Sunshine Diner to change hands. It’s why she didn’t want to deal with this whole screw-up of a divorce.

  And having a fake relationship with a man you’re impossibly attracted to isn’t messy? Get real.

  Ethan put his hands on her hips and pushed her against the kitchen counter, his hips flat against her belly as he wedged her in place. Then he inclined his head back toward the dining room. “They’re spying on us, aren’t they?”

  “Absolutely.”

  “We should sell it.”

  His fingers toyed with the hem of her sweater, the stark black one she’d chosen because she knew it made the best of her red hair. Because she wanted to look good…to feel good. Her heart thudded in her chest and there was a tightness gathering in her belly, an instant ache between her legs, and a shakiness in her breath that she hadn’t felt in a long damn time.