Forever Starts Now

by London, Stefanie

  The possibilities were endless.

  Monroe dusted off old tools, even digging some out of a box she’d kept stored under her tiny dining table ever since she’d moved in. The oven beeped as she set it to preheat and then she lost herself in the process of creation, feeling hope kindling in her chest.

  Feeling like…maybe she could be this person again.

  …

  Ethan spent all day Friday and Saturday thinking about seeing Monroe. The night they’d slept together, he’d awoken to find her pottering around her kitchen, the smell of chocolate cake wafting in the air. He’d stood by the bedroom door and watched, enraptured, as the woman he’d seen on Sugar Coated came to life before his eyes.

  She was vibrant. Luminous.

  He’d been so enamored, in fact, that they’d taken a shower together, kissing long and slow and touching one another until they were dizzy with desire. Then they’d ordered pizza from the only place still open, and had eaten it while watching a movie on her couch.

  But he hadn’t spent the night.

  Something told him that Monroe’s transformation was a warning sign that he shouldn’t get too close—she needed a man who was going to be there for her long-term. A man who had plans to set down roots and to give her everything she deserved. But Ethan wasn’t that man. If it turned out that the troublemaking Matthew Brewer of Forever Falls wasn’t his father…then he’d be moving on, leaving her and the town behind so he could chase the next ghost on his list.

  For some reason, the thought settled uncomfortably in his gut. The idea of walking away from Monroe didn’t feel good. Which was precisely why he couldn’t get too involved with her. Sex was one thing—and he enjoyed the hell out of it—but sleeping over and allowing either one of them to think this was real was only setting them up for near-future disappointment.

  Even if it turned out that this Matthew Brewer was his father, then why would he stay? There was no family, from the information he’d gleaned, and it sounded like everyone hated the man. Ethan would simply close the loop on his life and figure out what came next.

  But as he pulled up to the front of Monroe’s apartment, there was no denying the excited feeling in his stomach. The anticipation swirling like butterflies that made him fidget in his seat until she suddenly appeared at the little door next to the bakery, an emerald-green coat wrapped around her slim frame, and offsetting her hair to perfection.

  She raised one mitten-covered hand in a wave before she opened the passenger side door and slid into the seat next to him. The scent of vanilla hit his nose and Ethan almost hummed at how good she smelled.

  “You’ve been baking again,” he said, starting the engine.

  She yanked one mitten off and then the other, stuffing them both into a pocket of her coat. Her cheeks were pink from the damp, chilly air; the temperature had dropped suddenly that afternoon. “I have, actually. But don’t worry, I showered.”

  “Ah, so that delicious smell isn’t cupcake icing then.”

  “Frosting.” She grinned. “And no, I uh…put some perfume on.”

  Perfume. He’d never smelled anything like this on her before, not in any of the times they’d been together—like on their fake dates or the dinner at her sister’s house.

  Don’t get excited that she wore it for you. She probably just felt like smelling nice. No. Big. Deal.

  Only it did feel like something special and maybe that was because he’d thought about her when he’d gotten dressed that night. He’d worn his leather jacket, even though it was probably cold enough for the puffy coat, because he wanted to dress up.

  Monroe leaned over and inhaled. “You smell pretty good, too.”

  “Soap and shampoo, the rest is all me.” He turned his head and they were so close that he could easily kiss her. He wanted to. Actually, what he really wanted was to say screw the haunted house and take her right back upstairs and to bed.

  Get a grip man. You’re not a horny teenager.

  Clearing his throat, he pulled back and was surprised to see a flash of disappointment in Monroe’s eyes. Or was that wishful thinking?

  “I looked up where we have to go,” he said, deciding to leave bad ideas alone. “Tour starts at one of the historic graveyards and then we go to the mansion after that.”

  “Great.” She nodded and settled back into her seat, yanking the seat belt across her body.

  Ethan pulled slowly out into Main Street in the direction heading out of town. He’d already programmed the address into his phone and the robotic voice directed him to keep along Main Street for several blocks.

  “Don’t listen to that,” Monroe said, pointing. “Take Carlisle Street.”

  Ethan frowned. “This is the most direct route. I looked it up.”

  “Who’s lived in this town their whole life, huh? Carlisle is quicker.”

  She was doing that weird thing again—wanting to take back streets and going some strange way out of town.

  “What’s the rush? We have plenty of time.” Ethan went through the intersection of Main and Carlisle, ignoring her directions. He felt Monroe tense up beside him, almost as if she was shrinking against the door.

  “Good to know even people in fake relationships argue about directions,” she grumbled.

  He slowed down behind a small train of cars at a red light. Being Saturday night, there were a few people out and a restaurant had warm lights glowing in the windows and the outlines of people sitting down to a meal. Out of the corner of his eye, he watched Monroe. There was something going on with her. Something weird.

  Her eyes locked on a place as they sat at the lights. A yoga studio?

  “What’s going on?” he asked. Yep, she was definitely looking at the yoga studio. It had a big sign in the front saying “for lease” and was otherwise dark inside.

  “That was my cousin’s yoga studio,” she said, tearing her eyes away. “The cousin who was having an affair with my husband.”

  The barely suppressed anger in her voice hit him like a fist to the solar plexus. That’s why she avoided this part of Main Street, so she didn’t have to drive past the scene of the crime.

  “Shit.” He glanced over at her. “I’m sorry, Monroe. I had no idea that was why you didn’t want to drive down here.”

  “It’s a stupid thing, I know.” She shook her head. “That I’ll take any other street and drive out of my way not to go past it, but every time I look at that place…”

  The lights changed and the traffic started moving again. Soon the yoga studio was behind them.

  “You shouldn’t let them have that kind of power over you,” he said. “This is your town, not theirs. You were the victim of their bad behavior, you were the one who gave everything to your marriage and got nothing in return.”

  “You say that with a lot of confidence for someone who wasn’t around at the time it happened.” Her expression softened and she seemed to relax again now that the studio wasn’t in sight.

  “I may not know you well, but I know enough to see what a good person you are,” he replied. And he meant every word of it. “I saw how you were with your dad at dinner, how much you care about your family. The fact that you spent most of your prize money fixing up his house to give him a better quality of life, it all points to how big your heart is.”

  “It’s not the fact that my marriage ended that upsets me so much.” She shook her head. “It’s what it did to my family.”

  “Her side of the family didn’t believe you?”

  “It was more that Amber made them believe I was standing in the way of true love.” She snorted. “If that was the case, then why didn’t Brendan leave me first? Why go behind my back? Because they were cowardly, both of them.”

  “But the family didn’t agree?”

  “Nope. My dad was furious, and he got into a massive argument with his sister about it. I’d
always been close with my aunt and my cousins, but after that…” She blinked and something shimmered in her eyes. He had to fight every instinct in his body not to pull the car right over to the side of the road and haul her into his arms. “My dad said they betrayed the values we held as a family by supporting Amber and the affair. He basically told my aunt that she’d raised a horrible a person with no moral compass and my aunt returned the barb by saying he’d raised a daughter who didn’t know how to hold onto a man.”

  Ethan whipped his head toward Monroe. “That is complete bullshit.”

  “You’re defending my honor,” she said with a laugh. “How romantic.”

  “I…” He didn’t even know what to say.

  “I know my aunt was angry and defending her daughter because my dad took the first swing, but it hurt. A lot.” Monroe swallowed.

  “Did your dad tell you what she said?”

  “No, I was staying with him after I’d moved out of Brendan’s and I picked up the phone to call someone…I heard the whole thing myself.”

  “Ouch.”

  “Things were never the same after that. I couldn’t look any of them in the eye knowing they thought it was my fault, even if they were only trying to save face. But I miss what we used to have as a family—these huge Christmas lunches with everyone under one roof, all the noise and laughter and…” Her voice wavered. “The affair didn’t just ruin my marriage, it ruined my family.”

  He shook his head. “That’s a bloody awful thing to happen.”

  “Relationships are never only about the two people in it. When you’re with someone a long time it bleeds into your family and your friendship groups. Untangling that is messy.”

  “Unless you walk away and leave the other person to deal with it all.”

  It might have sounded like he was talking about her ex, but really he was reflecting on himself. “That’s what I did to Sarah. I left and she was the one who had to deal with the aftermath.”

  “She gave you an ultimatum, Ethan. It’s different.” Monroe pressed a hand to his arm. “You’d experienced a massive loss and a huge shock. It’s no wonder you wanted to break away from it all and figure things out. If you love someone, you should support them through those difficult times, not try to guilt them into putting someone else’s needs before their own.”

  “That’s what I always thought. I would have gone with her, if roles were reversed.” He knew that down in his heart. He would have done anything for her.

  “Of course you would have.” Monroe said the words like they were a fact carved in stone.

  “You seem pretty confident for someone who wasn’t there when it happened,” he teased, echoing her words from earlier.

  She laughed. “Touché.”

  “Thank you, though. Some days I don’t even think I understand why I have this driving need to find out who my dad was. I know it won’t make a difference—he’s gone. I won’t ever get the opportunity to know him.”

  “Sometimes the important things don’t make logical sense,” she replied with a shrug. “But we know it on a gut level when something is right.”

  Being with Monroe is right.

  The thought flashed up, unbidden. Unwanted. But it resonated like the gong of church bells through his body, stretching on and on. For the first time in so long, it felt like he could just…be.

  He wasn’t trying to impress the directors at his work, he wasn’t trying to fit in with his half brother and Ivan, the man he’d called Dad. He wasn’t trying to keep Sarah happy by being everything she needed and planning a wedding that was far more extravagant than he truly wanted. He wasn’t trying to reach a level of success that would prove to the man who raised him that all the things he’d teased him for were worth something.

  “You okay?” she asked, and he laughed. Monroe was the one who’d been forced to face a bad memory because he didn’t want to let her give him driving instructions and now she was being sweet and caring toward him?

  “I don’t know how it would be possible to not be okay around you,” he said.

  She turned away to look out the window, but he caught a quick flash of a smile on her lips and growing rosiness in her cheeks.

  …

  Outside, the sun was setting. A thick band of orange and gold lay across the horizon, and the purple-blue of night was close behind. They’d reached the outskirts of Forever Falls, meeting Brian and the rest of the people attending the tour at the gates of one of the oldest cemeteries in Massachusetts. They’d walked around the grave sites, listening to stories about a few mysterious deaths and local urban legends.

  Monroe had to admit, Brian was quite the storyteller. You’d never get that impression of him meeting him on the street, but it seemed like when the sun began to set and he got out into the night air, his skills came to life.

  Now they had a few minutes to wander around before it got fully dark and before they headed to the haunted mansion for the night’s main event. The group was small—two older couples who were visiting, and a gentleman who was writing a book and doing the tour as part of his research.

  Ethan chatted away with one of the couples, who’d apparently been to the west coast of Australia several years back, and they wanted to pick his brain about a potential trip back there to visit Melbourne and Sydney. Monroe was looking at one grave in particular, being careful where she stepped so as not to disturb anything, when Brian approached her.

  “Can I have a word?” he asked, his hands shoved into the pockets of his coat.

  “Sure.”

  He turned his back on the group for a second and Monroe frowned. She knew Brian well enough, but couldn’t think of a reason that he’d want to talk to her privately.

  “It’s about your boyfriend,” he started. “And the stuff about the letters.”

  Monroe nodded, curiosity piqued. “Okay.”

  Brian let out a sigh. “Look, I probably shouldn’t be telling you any of this, but if the letters are likely to exist anywhere then they’ll be with Lottie May.”

  “Really?” Monroe raised an eyebrow. Everybody knew Lottie May—she was a Forever Falls lifer from way back, independent to the core and known to have a bark worse than her bite. She came into the diner sometimes, and there were a lot of stories that had swirled around about her over the years…

  She’d been single for as long as anyone could remember, no kids. No family. Things that were unusual for a woman of her generation. Not to mention the fact that she’d run the inn on her own for years, well past when most people would be looking to retire. Monroe was sure her dad said that there’d been suitors over the years and possibly a secret relationship of some kind, but the woman was locked up tighter than Fort Knox.

  No easy feat in a town like Forever Falls.

  “Why Lottie?” Monroe asked.

  “When Mrs. Brewer died, the executor of the will was some guy from out of state. A distant cousin or something, and he didn’t really want anything to do with it. They hired a company to pack all the things up and get rid of it. The executor guy came and picked through to see if there was anything of value, but there wasn’t of course.” Brian shook his head.

  Monroe echoed the movement. “Then what?”

  “Everything else was supposed to go to the dump. I knew that because I was doing some removal work at the time. On the day we were loading everything into the truck, Ms. Lottie turned up in tears.”

  “Tears?”

  “Yeah, I never seen nothing like it. That old lady is hard as nails and I never seen her cry before.” He raked a hand over his hair. “But she begged me to keep some of the stuff. Nothing fancy, you know, just some photo albums and that kind of thing. Sentimental stuff.”

  “And you let her?”

  He glanced around as though wanting to make sure no one was overhearing. “I decided to use that moment to take a smoke break and
I told Ms. Lottie as such. When I came back she was gone, and so were two boxes.”

  “Why would she want Mrs. Brewer’s things?”

  “I don’t know. They were friends, I guess.” He shrugged. “I remembered it after you and your man came past my office. But she made me promise that I’d never seen her that day, not to mention I’d get in trouble for letting someone go through the stuff, even though none of it was worth even a penny. So, do with that information what you will, but you didn’t hear it from me.”

  “Thanks, Brian, I appreciate it.”

  “I trust you, Monroe. Your family has always been nice, even to the likes of me.”

  Monroe’s father had given Brian a job when he couldn’t find work anywhere in town, because of his checkered past—a past that was deeply entwined with the troublesome Matthew Brewer. But Olly thought Brian was a good guy, if a bit naive, and that he’d been swept up in the wrong crowd.

  It was that job that had helped him get back on his feet and be able to start his ghost tours business.

  “I promise I won’t breathe a word of it to anyone besides Ethan. Finding his mom’s letters is really important to him, so I’m glad you told me.”

  Brian nodded and then headed back toward the group, catching the eye of the male writer and engaging him in conversation. They were due to leave in five minutes and head to the haunted mansion.

  Monroe’s mind was swirling and a little flame of hope flickered in her chest. If Ethan found out that his father had been from Forever Falls, then maybe he’d have reason to stay. And for some reason, that made her feel far, far happier than it should.

  Chapter Sixteen

  Ethan parked his rental at the Krick mansion, along with the other tour participants. The building was a behemoth, two stories with a generous-looking attic up top. The windows had shutters that were all painted a uniform navy blue, which contrasted against the pale gray weatherboards. Or maybe they were green? It was hard to tell in the dim light.