Forever Starts Now

by London, Stefanie

  And that made it all worth it. Seeing the beaming smile on Monroe’s face and the lightness in Darlene’s voice, knowing that he was doing something to help a business that made an impact in their lives…yeah, wearing a cheesy costume was totally worth it.

  When there was a lull in activity, Monroe came over with a near-empty tray of cupcakes. Three little cakes were left. “Nobody wants this one because it has a wonky marshmallow.”

  “I’ll take it.” Ethan swiped the cupcake off the tray and used the pretzel stick to pry the marshmallow hammer off. He stuck it into his mouth and chewed.

  As they were standing around, Taylor approached them with a wave. She wore black jeans with a frayed slash across one knee, motorcycle boots, and a bright red leather jacket over what looked like a Metallica concert T-shirt. Her tattoos peeked out where the jacket sleeve ended on her right wrist.

  “I heard there were cupcakes going around,” she said, reaching for the tray. “Or are these for customers only?”

  “Nah, you can have one. We’re pretty much done anyway,” Monroe said. “All the vouchers have been handed out and I think I have tortured poor Ethan well enough, making him take photos with people and wear that costume out in the chill for two hours.”

  “It’s hot.” Taylor winked and took a bite out of her cupcake. “Damn, Monroe, this is amazing.”

  “It’s just a cupcake.”

  “No, it’s not just anything.” Taylor looked over to Ethan. “Can you try and talk some sense into this woman? She shouldn’t be working here putting money in someone else’s pocket when this is what she can create.”

  “Maybe I don’t want to work for myself,” Monroe said, frowning. “I get that you’ve always had issues with answering to people, but—”

  “You haven’t?” Taylor snorted. “Please. Independence and a stubborn streak run in every Roberts woman in our family. It’s part of our DNA.”

  “You’re as bad as Loren,” Monroe grumbled.

  On the surface people might think them very different—especially with Taylor’s leather and tattoos, versus Monroe’s curls and freckles. But under all that surface stuff, he could see how similar all three sisters were. How fiercely they loved one another, to the point that they didn’t mind ruffling a few feathers to speak up for something they believed in.

  “Running a business is a whole lot of work,” Monroe said, looking to Ethan for support.

  “I think Taylor has a point.” He shoved the last bit of his cupcake into his mouth and savored the perfect blend of salty and sweet. “You’re exceptionally talented and while I know you take your job here very seriously, I think you could do more.”

  She gaped at him. “You’re supposed to take my side.”

  “I take the side of truth.” He shrugged in a sorry-not-sorry fashion.

  “I knew I liked you,” Taylor said with a grin.

  “You can have him.” Monroe rolled her eyes. “One boyfriend, going free.”

  “I already got my dream man, no offense.” Taylor patted Ethan on the arm. “All right, I’d better get back to the shop. I promised Tim I’d bring him back a coffee.”

  Ethan waved as Taylor made her way off down the street.

  “I stand by it,” Ethan said to Monroe. “I admire your tenacity and desire to breathe new life into the diner, but your talent is wasted here.”

  Monroe opened her mouth like she was about to shoot a comeback at him, but something stopped her. Instead, she sighed.

  “I’ve thought about it a lot over the years,” she admitted. “Dreamed about it, even.”

  “Then why not pursue it?”

  She looked at the lone cupcake sitting on her tray. It was a small morsel of perfection—the shape, size, color…everything looked professional. They’d spent all morning listening to people gushing over how good her baking tasted and he saw the pleasure Monroe took in hearing it. She loved to bake. Anyone could see that.

  “Hey, if baking is purely about the joy of creation, then don’t let anyone tell you that you have to make it a business,” he said. “But something in my gut tells me that it’s not a lack of desire holding you back. Am I wrong?”

  “No,” she admitted, barely meeting his eye.

  “Then what is?”

  “I guess… I don’t trust that good things will last.” Her dark brown gaze dragged back up to him. “What if I fail?”

  “What if you don’t?” he replied. “What if instead you create something amazing?”

  “Were you born with enough confidence for an army, or did you acquire that somewhere along the way?”

  Ethan dropped his fake hammer down and slipped an arm around Monroe’s waist, drawing her closer. “I simply believe that I’m living my life for a reason. That reason has changed a bit in recent times, of course, but it’s not confidence so much as an understanding that I’m doing what I’m meant to be doing. Do I have any idea if I’m going to succeed? No, because nobody knows the future. But does that deter me from trying? No, and it shouldn’t deter you, either. What’s the point of living if you don’t try anything new?”

  Monroe let out a long breath and her eyes sparkled when they looked up at him. He saw her now, every part of her. The sad bits and the vulnerable bits and the hurt bits and that tiny, flickering flame of hope that hadn’t yet been extinguished.

  “You deserve to try everything,” he said softly. “Every single thing you want.”

  She pressed up onto her toes, the tray clattering to the ground as she wound her arms around his neck and pressed her body to his, kissing him long and deep. Her lips coaxed his open and her tongue slid into his mouth and her hands drove into his hair.

  This wasn’t a kiss of lust. It was raw and open and terrifying. It was a kiss that promised a future, the kind of future that Ethan had once dreamed about, a future that still hovered in the back of his mind like a ghost.

  A future that he could see with Monroe.

  She pulled back, one hand cupping his jaw, and she looked him deep in the eyes. There was something about the way she looked at him that said maybe she saw all the bits of him, too.

  She opened her mouth to say something, but before she could, a voice called out, “Monroe!”

  And at that moment, based on the way she stiffened in his arms, Ethan had the feeling that something was about to go horribly wrong.

  Chapter Eighteen

  Oh no…not now.

  Monroe’s breath stuttered in the back of her throat. It was a good thing Loren wasn’t standing next to her, because Monroe let out every curse she knew under her breath. The irony was not lost on her that the very thing she’d requested at the beginning of their arrangement—a kiss without questions that she could use like an ace in her back pocket should her ex show up—was actually the very last thing Monroe wanted right now.

  And yet, Brendan stood on the sidewalk of the Forever Falls main strip, watching her kiss a man with everything she had. And there had been nothing fake about it.

  “Who’s that?” Ethan asked as Monroe stepped back out of his grip, almost slipping on the tray she’d dropped. The last little cupcake had toppled onto the footpath and she stepped on it, squashing the frosting and fluffy cake into the ground with her boot. The pretzel stick snapped like a twig.

  “Um, no one. Give me a minute.” Flustered, she scooped up the tray and stomped her boot against the ground, dislodging the frosting like she did with snow build up. “Sorry, Ethan.”

  She left him standing there, brow furrowed, as she stalked toward her should-have-been-ex-husband. Brendan looked slick, like always. He was wearing a suit, which seemed ridiculous considering there was no earthly reason to be wearing one in Forever Falls. Even the people from the local accounting firm barely wore a suit to work. But that was Brendan’s style—he always had to look like the most important person in the room. His hair was overly style
d and he had a bit of a tan, which was weird for February. Fake tan? Possibly. Or maybe he’d taken Amber on vacation.

  “What do you want?” she asked coldly, as she stopped in front of him, folding her arms across her chest.

  “You know what I want.” But Brendan’s eyes weren’t on Monroe. Oh no, they drifted past her to where Ethan stood in front of the diner. There was a hard set to his jaw, almost like he was grinding his back teeth.

  Was he…jealous?

  “And I told you I’ve been busy and your needs are not my number one priority anymore.”

  “Let’s be real, my needs were never your number one priority,” he snapped. That’s when the handsome surface cracked and the ugliness inside him poked out. How had it taken her so long to see below the surface? “You were too busy dropping everything for your father and your sisters.”

  “I love my family.” She rolled her eyes. “What a horrible wife that must have made me.”

  “Makes you. We’re still married remember?”

  In true form, Monroe had the complete inability to hide her emotions and she automatically tensed when he spoke. That wasn’t good, because Brendan was perceptive—it was how he’d managed to hide the affair for so long.

  “He doesn’t know?” The bastard had the audacity to laugh.

  “I never said that.”

  “Didn’t need to, cupcake.” He grinned and Monroe cringed at the nickname. “Like always, your face tells a thousand words. Good to see some things haven’t changed. You know, I’d heard from folks around town that you were chronically single, so I have to admit this is quite the surprise…and good timing.”

  “What’s that supposed to mean?”

  Brendan lifted one suited shoulder into a shrug. “I’m not saying that you got some schmuck to play the part around the time you figured out I’d be coming back to this shit-hole of a town, but it seems mighty coincidental is all.”

  “Only if you put yourself at the center of the universe…speaking of things that haven’t changed,” she replied tartly. “And my relationship status is none of your business. I can’t imagine why you’d care to follow up on me after you left town. You had everything you wanted, so why would you give a crap what I’m doing?”

  Brendan’s expression faltered for a bit, but his icy resolve slid back into place in a second. “I don’t care. People talk of their own volition, that’s all.”

  At that moment, Monroe felt a presence behind her and judging by the smug smile morphing on Brendan’s lips, she knew exactly what was about to happen. There was no way to get around it. Ethan came up beside Monroe, his hand protectively at her back and his blue eyes narrowed in concern.

  She had two choices: let Brendan get one over her again, thus remaining passive in her life…or take control back and start living.

  Brendan stuck his hand out. “Hi, there, I’m—”

  “Ethan, I’d like you to meet Brendan…” She sucked in a breath. “My husband.”

  “Husband?” Ethan raised an eyebrow, his gaze remained locked on Brendan. “This is the guy who ran off with your cousin?”

  Brendan’s jaw tightened. His hand hung in the air for several more beats, but it was clear that Ethan had no intention of returning the gesture. Eventually, he dropped his arm limply by his side.

  “She didn’t tell you, huh?” Brendan asked, smug arrogance splashed all over his tone. “Paperwork mix-up, we’re still married and for some reason Monroe has been reluctant to make it official. I’m not trying to say it’s a reflection on your relationship of course, but…”

  He let the implication hang in the air.

  “If you have something to say, why don’t you say it?” Ethan looked down on Brendan, who’s runner-lean frame looked even slighter next to Ethan’s muscular bulk. Not that Monroe thought Ethan was the type to let things come to blows—he was a teddy bear in a grizzly’s body.

  “You want me to be blunt?” Brendan said with a cold laugh. “Fine. Your girlfriend has been lying to you and it’s clear she still harbors feelings for me, otherwise why delay the paperwork?”

  Despite the guilt and anxiety churning in her gut, Monroe burst out laughing. “That’s what you think? That I still love you? Good Lord, the ego on this man.”

  “Maybe she delayed the paperwork because she was sick of being bossed around by an asshole like yourself,” Ethan replied, his demeanor cool, calm, and collected. But his hand had dropped from its place at her lower back and Monroe sensed a tightness in him.

  This was not good at all.

  Ethan had been lied to by his own mother, so this would have to come as a blow. And if it didn’t, then that would be confirmation that he didn’t see the special thing they shared like she did. Either way, no matter which outcome occurred, it was bad news.

  Shouldn’t that be good news? He got what he wanted and you got what you wanted. Your ex saw you making out with someone hot and your family finally got off your back about being single.

  But it felt like a hollow victory. A meaningless victory.

  Please give me a chance to explain.

  “You’re in denial, Thor,” Brendan said with a sneer. “Nice costume, by the way. Do you do kids’ parties?”

  Monroe glared at her ex. “It must seem so strange to you to see a man supporting his partner.”

  “A partner he can’t even trust,” Brendan returned.

  “People in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones,” Monroe replied. “But if getting the paperwork done means I never have to see you again, then I’ll do it. I’ll do it on my time, however, and on my terms. You can turn up here as much as you like, but your actions don’t have any impact on me at all anymore.”

  Brendan’s neck turned red. “You’re a bitch, Monroe. You’re trying to make my life difficult on purpose.”

  “The world doesn’t revolve around you and your needs. If you expect the person you betrayed to drop everything simply because you asked, then your ego is out of control.” Monroe drew her shoulders back and looked him right in the eye the way she couldn’t bring herself to the first time they met with their lawyers.

  Something had shifted inside her; she wasn’t passive anymore. She wasn’t ashamed of her marriage breaking down. She wasn’t worried what people would think of her. The question she’d asked before—what if I fail?—was simply that, a question. It wasn’t a prediction of the future, and she could answer that question however she pleased.

  I won’t fail. I may stumble, but if I do I will pick myself up like I’ve done all my life.

  “Goodbye Brendan,” she said, feeling a strange sense of calm wash over her. It was almost as if she was releasing the past and the last vestiges of control her ex had over her. “I hope I never see you again.”

  His mouth hung open as Monroe turned to Ethan, her heart pounding like she’d run a hundred-yard dash. She had no idea how he was going to react, but she owed him the truth. The whole truth this time—not just the truth she used to shield herself against the world, but the uglier bits underneath.

  The bits she’d been ashamed of for far too long.

  “Can we talk?” she asked. “Please.”

  Ethan nodded. But the light had dimmed in his eyes and she felt him closing himself off. No matter the outcome, Monroe would lay everything on the table.

  Including telling Ethan how she felt about him.

  …

  Within fifteen minutes, they were back at Monroe’s place. Ethan had changed out of his Thor costume and into a pair of jeans and black hoodie, which felt necessary. He really didn’t want to have this conversation dressed as a superhero.

  Because frankly, he felt anything but super right now.

  Monroe was technically still married and she hadn’t told him. The second part of that equation mattered more to him than the first. And it hurt like a sucker-punch, which made him mad beca
use that meant he cared about her…which was not part of the plan. It wasn’t even adjacent to the plan. It was a whole stratosphere away from the plan.

  He watched as Monroe made them some tea in the kitchen. She’d insisted, and Ethan figured it was her way of buying a little extra time to gather her thoughts. Her hair was pulled back into a pretty braid that hung down her back and it flicked as she moved with less grace than normal.

  She was anxious about their chat. It radiated off her in waves.

  “Here,” she said, carrying two mugs to the coffee table. “Green tea with lemon.”

  “Thanks.”

  She dropped down onto the couch across from him. He’d taken the single chair to keep his distance, because his head was a messy mélange of emotions right now and he didn’t want to be breathing in Monroe’s sweet scent, lest it muddle his thoughts further.

  “So you’re married.” He didn’t touch the tea on the table in front of him. The steam curled upward, disappearing into the air.

  “Technically, yes.” She nodded. “After Brendan and Amber left town, we started divorce proceedings. At that time, I thought everything went ahead as it was supposed to and that I was officially divorced. I never followed up on it, though, because it wasn’t like I had plans to ever get married again. If it wasn’t for Brendan wanting to marry Amber we might not have found out for a long time. Especially since I never took his name, there was nothing to change back and I had my head buried so far into the sand after the last meeting I tried never to think about it again.”

  “When did you find out you were still married?” This was the question he wanted answered most of all—how long had she known?

  “Before we started dating…pretending to date…” She shook her head, like neither one of those options was quite correct. “Long enough that I should have told you.”

  “Then why didn’t you?”

  She let out a long sigh and looked at the mug of tea cradled in her hands. Her braid hung over one shoulder and her eyes were fixed on something he couldn’t see. Despite the hurt coursing through his veins, he still had the urge to reach out to her. To touch her. To comfort her.