Into the Hells

by Christopher Johns

  “It will take a little bit, but I can do that. Stop by after you complete your other business, and I will be happy to give you your purchases.” She took a quill and scribbled a few things down. “And you require healing and mana potions?”

  Yes. We were sure as FUCK getting those. We nodded, and she pulled out three different bottles.

  One of which I had seen before—it was the medium healing potions we had seen previously. Those were a gold each, so we nabbed twenty of them. The second vial was called a strong healing potion, and that was double as effective as the medium. It returned a full 100 HP instantly—we bought her out of those at two gold apiece for thirty vials.

  The final vial was called Sylph’s Vengeance. Sure, it sounded threatening—I should know, being the badass sylph that I am.

  Pump the guns baby, woo!

  The potion gave the user insane regenerative abilities for two minutes, both mana and health. She had only one of those, and we bought that for Jaken at twenty-five gold.

  Next, we went to browse through weapons, and I had to admit, these Elven weapons were forged excellently. They were light, and there were a few daggers that were made of a crystalline material that reminded me of the stuff that made up the buildings around the palace that we had been in.

  I bought that, as I had some things in mind for it, and Bokaj bought two of his own for me to enchant for Balmur. We would be in the Hells, and he needed to have some new weapons too just in case. Total, we spent seventy-five gold there. Then we went to see about food for us all.

  I know, I know—we have a Dragon’s hoard. A literal Dragon’s hoard at our disposal. We were so rich it really wasn’t funny, but spending like it’s hot is how you lose it, right? So yeah. We would still try to be frugal.

  The amount of food we got really was borderline reprehensible, it was. Yohsuke had our collective fat asses spoiled, and all of our purses were paying for it. And the amount of food we had to get to feed Kayda alone?

  Well. She was a growing, bigass girl. You can’t see me right now, but the look of pride on my face? Priceless.

  “Fuck, man, eighty gold worth of meat for that fuckin’ bird?!” Yohsuke shouted.

  Okay, okay. So there was a price after all.

  “I got that, man.” I stepped forward, but he shoved me back.

  “Fuck you. I buy the food for now. I need the ingredients to try and get my cooking level up.” Yohsuke pulled out his money and began counting, “Five. Ten. Fifteen…”

  That reminded me of something, and when we went to look at more accessories, I bought a thousand gold worth of high quality items—earrings, rings, bracelets, a nose ring, and a shit ton of purified silver.

  I had to try and give us some kind of ace up our sleeve. Jaken took the small metal ingots, about five hundred gold worth. Hopefully, it was enough considering that it was roughly sixty-five pounds of silver ingots.

  We left and made our way back to the potion maker’s hut. Fern wandered from us a little, just far enough to call loudly to vendors. He rubbed up against one Elven woman who harrumphed loudly, turned her head, and in her ‘displeasure’ she ‘accidentally’ knocked a whole section of fish and bones on the ground.

  The greedy cat scarfed down the morsel and rubbed magnanimously against the woman’s leg. She tried to play it off, but she definitely enjoyed the contact, and I had to say it. I had to.

  “Yo, I think that cat has higher charisma than Bokaj, man.”

  Jaken blinked at me, turned to look at the cat who had found another person to mooch off of, and then looked back with a grin.

  “Looks like that’s completely true. He has this city on lock.” The Paladin laughed, and the others joined him.

  Bokaj didn’t even seem to care. “Hey T’, why don’t you come out and we see who big man on campus really is. No reason to keep stressing for now—our goal is in sight. We can relax for a minute.”

  Tmont, her sleepy face popping out of Bokaj’s hood, blearily glanced about before putting her head down.

  “There’s food out here,” Bokaj taunted, and Tmont’s head shot back out of her hidey hole.

  “Food?” The cat’s purr sounded a little lighter than normal, but as soon as she cleared his hood, she began to do the same as Fern, the other cat having not noticed his new competition.

  One stall caretaker offering jerky actually squeaked in surprise and delight that Tmont was in front of him.

  “Who is this?!” he cried. He picked T’ up and stared into her eyes. “You’re beautiful! Are you a friend of Mr. Fern?”

  Tmont, unbeknownst to her admirer, responded, “I have no recollection of this Fern, but feed me, strange Elf. And I will forgive you for picking me up.”

  “Hey, man, since when can T’ get so small?” I asked Bokaj as I tried not to laugh at his cat.

  “At first, I didn’t know she could.” He scratched his head, “I thought it was only for travel, but when she got really cold and wanted to hide, she just shrank so that she could fit into my hood. She’s the size of a normal cat now. If she wanted to, she could likely go back to her fighting size.”

  Huh. Could Kayda do that? It was a decent question.

  Oh man, I was going to be so mad if that could happen. I had a twenty-foot-tall bird with a serious appetite, and we were going into the Hells. Maybe I could ask Questis about it.

  I didn’t dare disturb him if he was working on our key home. Perish the damned thought right there and then.

  I did, however, enjoy watching Fern and Tmont begging for food until Fern realized that he had company.

  “Who are you?!” The green and white cat’s fur bristled and stood on end. He began to pace around the interloper.

  “My name is Tmont, and I am my master’s protector,” the black cat replied coldly. “I take it that this is somewhere you think belongs to just one cat?”

  “Yes!” Fern yowled; a crowd had begun to gather and coo over the two felines who seemed intent on a throwdown of some sort. “They’re my subjects, this is my city, and I will not share.” That last was hissed.

  “I am not concerned with that. All I want is food.” Tmont began to sway past Fern, but the other cat hopped into her way with his back arched.

  “And I’m telling you it’s mine!” The cat hissed violently, and Tmont stared at him for a second before deciding to back away.

  I honestly thought that she had finally learned not to be an idiot. Genuinely, I had.

  Rather than conceding, though, she grew to her full size and swatted the now-smaller cat aside like she might swat a ball of yarn.

  Fern nimbly leaped back on to his feet and began to grow as well. He was easily the same size as T’ but kept growing and growing until he was larger than her by two feet, his great green and white spotted pelt stretching over expanses of muscle that made the panther before him seem like a kitten. His incisors grew so long that I instantly knew that Fern was some kind of saber-tooth cat.

  He roared once, long and hard, and I felt it deep in my chest.

  “Hey, woah, guys, this is all in good fun, right?” Bokaj tried to talk over the clapping crowd.

  Apparently, it wasn’t unheard of for Fern to wander the city in this form as well? Fuck. I needed that cat form. For reasons.

  “Looking a little long in the tooth, eh Fern?” I stepped closer to Tmont; her body was rigid and tense—ready for a fight. “Didn’t Questis tell you not to do something like this?”

  The saber-tooth Fern regarded me with little interest before turning his gaze back to Tmont. His voice, much deeper and accompanied by a growl, “Back down.”

  I got T’. You wanna take care of the other one? Bokaj sighed into my mind.

  I put my left hand behind my back with a thumb up. Yeah, man. Good luck. I wanna get his form, so none of you freak out and kill him.

  The others remained quiet, so I took that as assent.

  The two cats were beginning to yowl and spit at each other as they padded back and forth across from each ot
her.

  As Fern leaped forward to attack Tmont, I pushed Tmont aside and threw my arm into Ferns maw. It hurt. A good deal, actually, taking fifteen percent of my health and leaving me with a bleed effect as well.

  “Well, Fern, thanks for that,” I grunted as he dislodged his teeth from my forearm. “Tell you what, you don’t say anything or attack my friend’s panther, and I won’t tell Questis or the queen what happened here. Deal?”

  Fern growled deeply and eyed me angrily before huffing finally, “He knows already, we share memories the same as you and the bird. However, the queen does not need to know. Be certain to tell my admirers.”

  Bokaj took the cue, scooping a struggling Tmont into his arms where she shrank until he could put her into his hood. “Stop struggling, you stank kitty!”

  The people around us seemed concerned for the ice Elf’s sanity, but when Fern began purring and tickling people with his tail, all seemed well.

  “No one saw anything that could potentially prevent Tmont, Mr. Fern’s friend, from coming back, right?” I asked as I cast Regrowth on myself.

  Several people shook their heads before returning to their work. Others brought food for Fern, and a few people even offered the Ranger a few scraps to give the angry Tmont as a treat. That seemed to go a long way toward easing her lingering resentment.

  We went back to the potion shop and collected our holy oil. While we were there, I bought five of every plant she had available. I didn’t even bother asking what they were or what they did because I didn’t get a system message from them weirdly, but the vendor said that it was because I didn’t know any kind of herb lore. And that seemed fair. Identifying plants seemed like a Druid type thing to do, but I wasn’t really too interested.

  These were for our own potion makers back in the village. It would be nice to be able to rely on them for potions rather than having to come here for the good stuff.

  The vendors had seemed wary of selling any kind of astral adaptor to Yohsuke, seeming downright hostile when he asked, and we didn’t dare show them the ones he already had. We would need to see if maybe Questis could send someone to buy one for us.

  That seemed reasonable.

  The rest of our time in the city was relatively uneventful, other than people giving Yohsuke odd looks here and there, but none of them seemed to care enough to do anything about his presence with Fern here.

  As we neared the palace, I called Kayda to me, and she allowed me to put her into my collar; thankfully, she still fit.

  The great cat crossed between the guards to the palace entrance without a second glance, and we filed in behind him.

  Maebe brought me out of the monotonous trek back to the palace as we entered. “I am going to be with Silvanas for a little while. Be safe, and if you need me, send for me. Otherwise, I will come to you when I am done.”

  “Okay, be safe, and give her my regards.” I touched her shoulder, and she kissed my hand before she left with a small, somewhat sad smile.

  My heart ached for her. She was watching someone she held in high regard die. Fuck that. I had gone through something similar with my grandmother. That woman had done everything for me, for her family, and all she had wanted for herself was that I sit under a blanket on her chair and heat it for her while she made her strawberries with sugar that I loved so much.

  She had passed away, withered before me, and though I knew that something was wrong, I could never have fully comprehended it. Not then.

  But I did now. And this was very similar.

  He led us down a red and green crystal hallway that led to a series of rooms furnished with various plants and some small sofas and tables with charts and tools littered across them haphazardly.

  “Ah, Fern, new friends, welcome to my humble offices.” Questis stepped out from behind an ivy green lattice covered secret passage. “I trust that my kitty was not too much to hand– Fern, you greedy thing, why would you be so full of yourself in front of our guests?”

  The cat sat with his head high and looked down imperiously at Questis. “You have known me since I was a kitten, Questis. How could you possibly not know that I would defend what is mine?”

  The Elf blinked at him once. “Because it is not yours?”

  “Simply semantics—Silvanas was a figurehead for my reign, and you know it.”

  Questis laughed heartily, wiping a tear from one eye. “She let you sit on her throne when she was cold because she likes cats! You really do have fur where your brain should be, my friend.”

  Fern just stuck his tongue out and padded toward a large cushion in a corner before shrinking to his original, house-cat size to snooze.

  “Forgive my thoughtless friend, please.” Questis turned to us and smiled. “You are welcome in my guest chambers if you so wish. There are plenty of rooms for each of you to sleep comfortably.”

  “Thanks, man.” Bokaj smiled. “I’m going to try and get some rest, maybe make some more arrows with that wood as the shaft. If we can, let’s try and get some holy spells held in them?”

  Jaken clapped him on the shoulder. “Zeke and I will work on that. You and T’ go rest. Why don’t all of you go get some Zs? I think Zeke has some things on his mind for me and Questis.”

  “Me too,” Yohsuke grunted.

  Questis regarded him, taking in his cloaked form, but waited until the others had left the room to ask, “Why do you hide yourself? You are purportedly not of this world, therefore the shame that would befall one of your birth would not be felt.”

  “Because everybody has their reasons to hate the abomination I chose. Just because I found this avatar advantageous doesn’t mean I enjoy seeing other people unnecessarily uncomfortable. Their reaction as a people is expected. Unavoidable.” Yohsuke pushed his hood back and let himself be seen for the first time since we had come here. “Happy?”

  “No,” Questis replied flatly. “Seeing you like this fills me with anger and pity for my brother who was the product of the same kind of union. He thinks much the same as you, about the necessities of his hiding among us, though he sees not the pain of his existence in himself but others. You have my respect for your answer. Thank you.”

  “Enough respect to possibly have someone purchase an astral adaptor for him?” I blurted hopefully.

  Questis blinked at me, taken aback for a second. “I did not see you using an astral adaptor during our spat earlier. Are you capable?”

  “I am.” He took out his first astral adaptor and held it out, blade engaged, the flowing black mana making the blade look similar to a katana.

  “This is garbage.” Questis broke the thing in half with a small grunt and began to poke inside until he found what he was looking for. A small, blackened object the size of a small nail file. “See how the crystal is blackened and charred?”

  We nodded, and he continued, “The amount of mana being passed through it was too dense, and it wasn’t strong enough.

  When a user’s mana is too high for the weapon, it degrades faster. Much faster. If you had used this possibly once more, it could have burst on you.” He shook his head ruefully. “Never pleasant business, but you have how much mana?”

  “Seven hundred and fifty,” Yohsuke answered, and I whistled. That was a good deal.

  Questis thought for a moment then shook his head. “You will be hard pressed to find a good fit out in the city with that much mana. I have a friend here in the castle. He dabbles in enchanting. I believe he was also tutoring the Dwarven enchanter before her studies were so rudely interrupted?”

  “Could he make something tonight?” I asked excitedly.

  Questis shrugged. “Perhaps. The art of making adaptors is lost on me. I prefer my plants and enchanting other items.”

  “Cool, so where do we go?” Yohsuke asked.

  “Your friends must stay.” Questis motioned to us. “He is reclusive, and too many people around make him… volatile.”

  You guys cool with me going it alone? he asked through our earrings.

/>   We have to be. I shrugged as if we were simply having a nonverbal conversation through glances and body language. Just be careful, and if shit gets bad, holler and make a big boom for us to follow to you.

  Yoh smiled and turned back to Questis. “I’m in. When do we roll?”

  “Fern!” Questis called over his shoulder. The cat ignored him pointedly. “You will earn your dinner tonight, you spoiled cat. Take our guest to see Zell. Then wait there until he is ready to return.”

  When the cat didn’t move fast enough, one of the many plants surrounding his plush pillow began to stretch impossibly long and began to reach slowly toward his leg. The cat opened an eye as if warned by instinct and hissed menacingly at the plant before eyeing Questis.

  “Hmph. See if I let you sleep tonight, Elf.” He stretched his body a little as he stood, then eyed Yohsuke. “Come along then, tormentor. The sooner you are there, the better.”

  “He will take you now.” Questis ignored the threat and waved Yohsuke after the disgruntled cat.

  When they were out of earshot, I asked, “How did you come across Fern? He seems…”

  As I was trying to find the right words, Questis chuckled. “Impetuous? Surly? Self-entitled? He has been that way since he was a kitten. The fact that he is a saber-tooth and larger than most of the other great cats gives him confidence beyond his ability at times. The city spoiling him because we do not have many animals here also does not help his… disposition on just how special he is.”

  I had to laugh. There was a saying back home: it takes a village to raise a child. A community can nurture and care for a whole family, and not everyone wanted to be a part of that. But it seemed like these guys all wanted to be the good guys for the cat, and that wasn’t necessarily bad, but it had to make things rough on Questis at times.

  “That’s rough, Questis.” A thought occurred to me. “How is it that Fern and Tmont can shrink from their original sizes? Would Kayda be able to do the same?”

  Questis blinked. “The roc?” I nodded hopefully. “I suppose she could. It is a thing that she could do herself as your familiar. All it really calls for is for her to envision herself growing smaller, and then from there, a small mana sacrifice. Fern does it almost without thought. Then the reverse to grow once more.”