Westcott High

by Sarah Mello

  Zero. I pressed down on the button.

  “Kyle would never go for someone like you, Langdon,” Ari said, looking her up and down. “And it has nothing to do with being a Cobalt or having an incredibly messed up family, which you do. You don’t have enough guts to claim what’s yours. If you did, you would already have Kyle.”

  Zero. I pressed again.

  “How could I when you’re always crawling back?” Casey asked.

  “I don’t crawl. I walk. With my head up and my fears on my sleeve. You think you’re the only one who has problems? We all do. But I don’t hide behind mine or use them as a crutch as to why a guy wouldn’t like me. I don’t let being a Cobalt stop me from getting what I want. Including a Violet. If you had any type of confidence in yourself, maybe you could get one too.”

  Zero.

  “And which Violet is that, Ari? Because I’m pretty sure everyone in this room would say you’re really in love with Cliff.”

  Ari stepped forward. “You don’t know what you’re talking about, little girl.”

  Once more. Zero.

  “And you don’t know what you want!” Casey shouted. “But maybe when you figure it out, you can let Kyle know. So he can move on without feeling guilty that he’s walking away from the girl who’s milking being his first love.”

  Ari’s breathing became heavy.

  “Yeah,” Casey said. “The only crutch I see is you.”

  One.

  I once heard that the average person loses fifteen socks a year when washing their dirty laundry. Over your lifetime, that's close to thirteen hundred socks floating in some mysterious oblivion, never to be seen again. And sometimes that's how the answers to life's puzzles are too. You search and search for that missing piece because your gut tells you it's there—but it's really just beyond your fingertips in that dark void where missing socks go.

  14

  Time

  Time—the one thing we all take for granted. I’ve always stood in awe that we as humans are able to convince ourselves we have enough of it, all the while knowing we’re continually running out. If you ever get the chance, take a good long look at a clock. Watch the heavy hand tick by, knowing with every second that passes, you’ll never get it back. Those daunting ticks can change a person. And so it did.

  “Where did Kyle go?” I asked as we all rushed into the gym.

  The team was warming up, with five or so minutes before their first big game.

  “He couldn’t have gone back to his dad's house without the keys,” I said as we walked up the side of the blue bleachers, my blue jeans clinging to my legs.

  Buckets pulled his tablet out of his bag. “Maybe he felt sick.”

  “Or maybe he bailed,” said JC, who was wearing his wrestling jacket from the previous season.

  We all climbed to the top bleacher and nestled into the row; Ari went elsewhere. After Ari and Casey’s fight, it was probably for the best.

  I glanced down at my phone. “I’ve tried calling him a thousand times. He won’t take my calls.”

  “That doesn’t seem like Kyle. He always answers your phone calls,” Winston said, propping up his loafers in between two students on the row below us.

  “I think we should hand this over to Jacob’s dad,” Buckets suggested. “He’s the investigator. Let him figure out the riddle.”

  “We’ll talk to Ron on Monday.” I stared at Mr. Harrison from across the room. His face was filled with joy as he watched Jacob run up and down the court. “I’ll ask him to meet us at the club for dinner.”

  “Can’t we talk to him tonight?” Casey asked.

  “No,” I replied. “This is a big night for Jacob. I don’t want to ruin it for him.”

  I looked down at the court. Jacob was shooting baskets on one end; Dean was talking to Coach T on the other. Their eyes were heavy, and it was painfully obvious I was the reason for both of their lackadaisical demeanors. Jacob’s eyes suddenly met mine—and it wasn’t the pleasant kind of meeting. He stared at me for a split second and then looked away. I never expected to start the year off down a boyfriend, and so quickly end up with two guys on my plate. The truth was—I wanted Jacob, and I couldn’t explain it, not even to myself, but I also needed Dean. My sigh sang a shameful tune.

  Suddenly, Winston nudged me on the leg. “Look at them.”

  I followed his gaze and realized he was staring at Cliff and Ari.

  “It’s almost as if they don’t care who sees them.”

  “They’re just sitting together,” I replied.

  “They’re always together,” he said. “I don’t get it. It’s like they want to get caught.”

  “I don’t think that’s it,” I replied, unsure of how much longer I could keep their secret.

  “They’ve spent weeks trying to convince Kyle that nothing is going on between them, but it’s right in front of his face. You don’t have to want to believe it to see it. It’s beyond obvious.”

  I looked around the gym as the crowd settled. The teams were preparing for their game. The referees were discussing the rules. The coaches leaned over their clipboards. The scorekeepers were testing the scoreboard, and the students were gathering their signs. Everything seemed to be quieting down, and everything seemed to be in order. But no good event comes without a little trouble. And I hear once you solve one problem, you’re merely steps away from your next.

  “Winston . . . there’s something I haven't told you.”

  Just then, I placed my hands over the sides of my face as the fire alarm pierced through both my eardrums. The sprinklers shot on, filling the gym with gusts of water and hysteria. Everyone started yelling and running down the bleachers. The moms tried covering their silk designer shirts, face paint melted down the cheeks of my peers, and the dads were likely in the corners somewhere, blaming the coaches for things outside of their control. It was pandemonium—Westcott style.

  “Let’s get out of here!” Winston yelled, pushing me toward the end of our row.

  Buckets frantically shoved his tablet inside of his messenger bag. “I think I triggered the sprinkler system,” he said as we all ran toward the exit door, which after a long wait, dumped us outside into parking lot B.

  I ran my fingers through my wet hair, my makeup running down my face. “You think?”

  Students flew from the doors, covering their heads. In the middle of the running crowd—we spotted someone walking. And they weren’t walking toward us.

  “Kyle!” Casey shouted, running toward his white Range Rover.

  We all followed, but kept our distance.

  “Kyle, wait!” she yelled again, taking the ponytail out of her hair.

  “What do you want, Casey?” he asked.

  “What is wrong with you?” Casey tucked her wavy wet hair behind her ears.

  “Are we friends again?” His harsh tone was telling.

  Casey attempted to dry her glasses with her sleeves. “Are you upset with me?”

  He pressed down on the outer edge of his eyebrows. “No. I’m not upset with you, Casey.”

  “Then what are you?”

  “I don’t know,” he replied, still pressing.

  “You can’t honestly expect me to just be friends with you,” she said.

  “I don’t, Casey.”

  “Well then, what do you want from me?”

  Kyle quickly glanced at me and then looked back at her. “I just want you to leave.”

  Casey’s eyes narrowed. “Leave?”

  “Just leave so I can’t hurt you.”

  “Is that what you want?” Casey asked, tossing Norah’s advice out the window. “You want me to leave you alone?”

  They stared at one another, unblinking. I knew her question weighed heavily on Kyle’s mind, because I knew that wasn’t what he wanted. But he was stuck between what he wanted and what he’d always known—a battle I was far too familiar with.

  “You’re too good for me, Casey.”

  “Me?”

  “Yes,
” he replied. “I’ll ruin you.”

  “I doubt it,” she said. “Can we just talk about this?”

  Kyle stared at her in apology. “I’m sorry, Casey.”

  He opened the driver’s side door to his car, but not quicker than JC, who slammed it shut.

  “What the hell, man? Where did you go?”

  Kyle turned around. “What do you care?”

  “Why did you leave us hanging?” Buckets asked, tossing his messenger bag behind his back.

  “Ky!” Cliff yelled as he approached the car. “What’s going on?”

  Ari followed.

  “Did you do that?” Cliff asked, staring at Kyle’s dry hoodie. “Did you set off the sprinklers?”

  “Don’t worry about me,” Kyle said as he reached for his car door handle.

  I grabbed his hand before he could open the door. We made eye contact, the kind that wouldn’t let you look away.

  “What’s wrong?” I asked him.

  The sound of distant sirens rang in the background as people gathered outside of the gymnasium door.

  Kyle pushed my hand down. “Don’t touch me, Sonny.”

  “Whoa!” Cliff stepped in between us.

  “What the hell is your problem?” JC asked Kyle.

  “My problem?” Kyle grabbed his bottom lip and smirked. “My problem is that you all think I’m some delusional idiot who doesn’t see what’s going on around me.”

  “What are you talking about?” I asked.

  “You’re not in love with me, Ari,” Kyle said as he turned his attention toward her.

  She sighed. “What are you talking about? Of course I am.” Her voice was emotionless, like she’d reassured him of this a hundred times before.

  “No.” He shook his head. “No, you’re not. You’re in love with my best friend.” Kyle tapped the roof of his car with his fingers. “Or I thought he was my best friend.”

  “Uh-oh.” Winston cracked his knuckles.

  “I am,” Cliff said, stepping closer toward Kyle.

  Kyle took a step back. “Get away from me, Cliff.”

  “No,” Cliff said, getting closer. “Come talk to me.”

  “I said get out of my face!” Kyle shoved Cliff backward, nearly dropping him to the ground.

  JC stepped in between them as I felt the familiar touch of Dean’s hand. He gently pulled me aside, out of the direct line of impact. I looked down at my arm and then stared into his eyes.

  “What’s going on?” Dean asked me.

  I couldn’t talk, but my wide eyes likely spoke for me.

  Cliff caught his balance and bounced back up. “You don’t want to fight me, Ky,” he said, brushing off his chest. “So don’t do that again.”

  “I’ll fight you if I need to,” Kyle replied.

  Winston slowly shook his head. “Grab the popcorn—the boys are becoming unhinged.”

  “Why are you doing this? Because you think your girlfriend likes me?” Cliff was becoming increasingly defensive.

  “Because you two hooked up!” Kyle shouted.

  Cliff ran his fingers through his blond hair. “I told you we didn’t!”

  “You’re going to look me in the eyes and lie to me? Again?” Kyle rolled his hands into a ball. “I just heard you and Sonny’s conversation.”

  I closed my eyes and exhaled.

  “Yeah.” Kyle looked at me, disappointment leaking from his pupils. “Next time you want to have a conversation like that, make sure there’s more than a bathroom door between us.”

  Cliff stalled. “Look, Ky, there are things you don’t know—”

  “Oh, please tell me you aren’t going to try to justify hooking up with Ari for months,” Kyle said. “There’s nothing you can say to justify that.”

  “Kyle—” I placed my hand on his shoulder.

  He looked down at me. “How could you not tell me? We’re supposed to be best friends, Sonny. How could you make me look like a fool all this time?”

  “Please,” Winston said. “Sonny hasn’t made you look like a fool, Kyle; you’ve made yourself look like one.”

  Kyle nodded. “Is that so?”

  “Yes, Winchester! We all knew it was Ari in the video!” Buckets stepped forward. “It was brutally obvious. You chose to pretend it was Lana.”

  “I chose to believe my best friend!” he shouted.

  “And I was wrong!” Cliff expressed desperation in a last-ditch attempt to save his friendship. “I was wrong, okay? I made mistakes—”

  “Oh God,” Kyle blurted out, locking his hands behind his head and pacing the pavement. “Miss me with your mistakes, Cliff. Kissing once would be a mistake. These were choices.”

  “My choices,” Cliff said. “No one else’s. It’s not Sonny’s fault, and it’s not Ari’s. It’s mine. I take full responsibility.”

  Ari crossed her arms. “Cliff—”

  “No, Ari. It’s my fault, okay? Don’t worry about it.”

  Kyle nodded, staring into his friend’s blue eyes. The history between them could fill the parking lot. It was strong and significant, and one would think a girl couldn’t break it. A Cobalt at that.

  “You think you can take whatever you want, Cliff. You’ve always been a taker.” Kyle placed his hands into his pockets. “But you don’t get to take her and get away with it.” He looked Cliff up and down. “You’re dead to me,” he said, aggressively brushing by Cliff’s shoulder on the way to his car.

  Cliff let out a quick breath and wiped his lips; his eyes glistened in the moonlight. Whether it was tears or a reflection, I wasn’t sure, but I was certain I had to do what I did next.

  And here it goes . . . the second good thing I had known Cliff to do.

  “Kyle, wait!” I shouted, grabbing him by the arm. “It’s not Cliff’s fault. Not entirely.”

  “Sonny, stop,” Cliff demanded.

  “No,” I replied. “You don’t get to call the shots anymore. It’s done.”

  “What are you talking about?” Kyle asked.

  I placed my hands on my head, pulling my hair back, my eyes stretching. “Cliff knew her first.”

  The whole group perked up in unison.

  “What do you mean?” Kyle’s eyes narrowed in on me.

  “Cliff and Ari met when she moved to Westcott, the summer before tenth grade,” I said, staring at Cliff. “The Zieglers moved into one of Mr. Reynold’s condos, and Cliff and Ari met inside the lobby one day. They started talking and texting, and before they knew it . . . they had spent the entire summer together.”

  Cliff put his hands into his pockets and looked down at the ground.

  “Cliff?” I said, suggesting he should take over.

  He shook his head, opening and closing his mouth. Finally, the words came. “You came up to me two weeks into sophomore year and told me all about this incredible girl. And you lit up when you talked about her. I had never seen you that happy. I knew you were upset about your dad and—”

  “Do not bring my dad into this!”

  “You were going through a lot, okay? And I was excited for you to have a distraction.” He paused. “When I asked you who the girl was, you showed me Ari’s picture.”

  Kyle put his thumb and pointer finger on his eyebrows and exhaled slightly as he ran them down his face.

  “So I did what I thought was right.” Cliff shrugged his shoulders. “I took out my phone and deleted her number. And when Ari confronted me about ghosting her, I told her to go.”

  “Go where?” Buckets questioned.

  “To you,” Cliff said, staring at Kyle. “I told her to go to you. Because with everything you were going through, you needed her more than I did.” He exhaled. “Look, Ky, I haven’t been trying to steal Ari from you.” He paused, shaking his head and trying to get the uncomfortable words out. Words Cliff wasn’t used to saying. “I guess I’ve just been trying to let her go.”

  Kyle shook his head. “No. You would have told me if you liked someone. Especially if you two had been talking a
ll summer.”

  “I didn’t tell anyone, Ky. I was embarrassed.”

  “Of what?”

  “Of Ari,” Cliff said. “I didn’t want anyone to find out I liked her. If that makes me a pretentious asshole, then I guess that’s what it makes me. But that’s the truth.”

  “You’re right.” Kyle looked at him, disgusted. “That does make you a pretentious asshole.”

  Cliff rolled up his sleeves. “Look, I know you can’t understand this, but I’m doing you a favor.”

  Kyle nodded. “You see, those are fighting words.”

  “If you want to fight me, Ky, then let’s go,” Cliff replied. “But don’t keep closing your eyes to the truth.”

  “Which is what?”

  “She doesn’t want to be with you!” Cliff shouted, clasping his hands behind his head.

  “And how would you know that? Because you had a summer fling before tenth grade?”

  “Jesus.” Cliff exhaled slightly. “Because she wants to be with me, Kyle! Can you not see that?” He paused. “You say people think you’re delusional? Well, maybe there’s a reason for that.”

  “So you think because you gave Ari to me that it excuses you going behind my back and hooking up with my girlfriend?” Kyle asked.

  “Both of you tuck your egos away,” Ari said. “Nobody gives me to anyone.”

  Kyle stared at her. “So I was just your second choice? You were only with me because you were following orders from Cliff?” he asked. “You just let me waste all this time?”

  “We became friends,” Ari said. “And I did fall for you, Kyle. I did love you.”

  “Did you fall in love with me?” he asked. “Because those are two separate things.”

  Ari continued rocking back and forth, ignoring his question.

  “Jesus, Ari, just tell me. Were you ever in love with me?” Kyle’s voice softened as it took a dive toward defeat.

  She slowly shook her head, her brown wavy hair falling down across her chest. “It’s complicated.”

  “Ari—”

  “I—”

  “Just tell me!” Kyle yelled.

  “No,” she said. “No, okay? I don’t think I was ever in love with you.”

  We all looked around the group at one another, afraid to breathe, afraid to move. It was the first time Ari had admitted to much of anything.