Fight

by Nicole Dykes

  “That makes no sense. You care about me.”

  “I’ll always care about you.” He leans down and kisses my forehead. “That’s why I won’t do this to you.”

  He pushes off me and sits on the edge of the bed. I lay there looking up at the ceiling, feeling ridiculous and angry. Rejected.

  A tear slides down my cheek and I’m glad he’s not looking at me.

  It’s Christmas Eve and my mom’s at work. I know she would rather be here, but rent’s due and she won’t let me work on a holiday. So she’s working today and tomorrow.

  She’s a saint.

  It’s cold in the house and I stare out the window seeing the snow fall. I know a lot of kids wish for a white Christmas, but me? I’m just dreading having to shovel the walk tomorrow before my mom heads out, so she doesn’t slip or think she needs to do it.

  She does enough.

  I pull on a pair of red, fluffy socks she gave me for Christmas a few years ago and smile when I hear a knock at the door.

  I walk through the living room and pull open the door, smiling when I see Carter’s big grin. He’s wearing a jacket, zipped up with the hood over his hair. And he’s holding up a bottle of rum and a carton of eggnog. “Let’s celebrate.”

  I smile, shaking my head as he walks in and I close the door behind him. “Pretty sure mom won’t approve of the rum.”

  He chuckles, not taking off his jacket. “Is she here?”

  I shake my head. “Nah, working til two.”

  He cringes and I know he cares about my mom like I do. “What about Dane?”

  We see him less and less. He hasn’t been at school much and I’m worried he isn’t going to get to graduate with us in the spring. “I haven’t heard from him. You?”

  He shakes his head. “You got movies?”

  I gesture for him to follow me and he does after grabbing two glasses from the kitchen.

  When he walks into my room I’m already searching for a movie. “I hate Christmas movies.”

  He sits down on the bed, pouring eggnog and rum into the cups. “I know that about you. Just pick your favorite movie.”

  I smile over at him gleefully. “Oh, it really is Christmas.”

  He groans, “Oh fuck. What ridiculous chick flick are you going to make me watch?”

  I laugh and choose my favorite. “Pretty Woman, duh.”

  He groans again, “I’m going to need a lot more rum.”

  I turn the movie on and sit next to him, taking my cup from his hand. “It’s not that bad and everyone has their fantasy.”

  His eyebrow arches upward asking, “Your fantasy is for a rich guy to treat you like a whore?”

  I roll my eyes and nudge him with my shoulder. “No.”

  His eyes lock on mine though, and I can’t help but stare into them. My throat feels dry and I try to swallow but can’t seem to get my body to do anything right now. “The movie’s on.”

  He says it but neither of us move until there’s a loud bang at my window and it makes us both jump. I look over and see Dane standing there with a wide grin on his face. “Let me in fuckers!” His voice is muffled by the glass, but only slightly.

  I roll my eyes and walk over, unlocking the window and lifting it up. “What are you doing outside my window you creeper?”

  He laughs as he drags his big body inside. “More fun that way.” He smirks over at Carter who’s still on my bed. “Did I miss anything good?”

  Carter shakes his head, “Only Pretty Woman for the millionth time.” He hands Dane his glass before leaving the room. Dane shrugs out of his coat and has a hoodie underneath.

  He slips his shoes off, flopping on my bed and crossing his ankles. “So did I miss anything else?”

  He wags his eyebrows at me and I roll my eyes, climbing onto the bed next to him, unsure how we’re all going to fit. “No. You didn’t.”

  He shakes his head at me, in mock disappointment, but he’s smiling. “Loser.”

  I flip him off and he chuckles. He’s been pushing me to make a move on Carter for years, knowing I have more than friendly feelings toward him. Always with his little games, but I’ve told him I’m not going to do that anymore.

  It’s too painful.

  But if Dane wouldn’t have showed up and Carter would have kissed me… I know without a doubt I would have let him.

  Carter walks in with his own glass and mixes the rum and eggnog before sitting down on the bed with us. He kicks his shoes off and soon we’re all leaned back against my headboard and our legs are out in front of us.

  The three of us are squished into the twin bed, but it doesn’t feel wrong. It feels more than right. I never feel more safe than when I’m with these two assholes.

  Three best friends on Christmas Eve drinking spiked eggnog and watching Pretty Woman.

  That’s normal right?

  I wake up with Shaw’s bare legs over my lap, which is fucking awkward with her thighs over my dick that is up and ready to play. It’s still cold in the house, but she’s only in the concert t-shirt and fuzzy socks. I open my eyes and see her head is on Dane’s chest. The girl moves a lot in her sleep.

  She’s almost laying fully across us.

  She really needs a bigger bed. Dane’s eyes open and he’s smirking at me, “I’m pretty sure we could turn this into a really fun situation.”

  I roll my eyes. He may be into dudes, but he still loves to fuck with Shaw. I’m pretty sure if he were ever with one chick, it would be her. And I’m not comfortable with the fury that burns inside me with that thought.

  I don’t want anyone touching Shaw. Not even Dane.

  “Pretty sure I’ll kill you if you touch her.”

  He chuckles at that. “I meant all three of us and I’d let you do most of the girl touching.”

  “Sick fucker.” I laugh because I can’t help it. We’re all fucked up, but we get each other. Nothing is off limits.

  “You guys do whatever you want, just don’t wake me,” Shaw grumbles.

  Jesus. I smack her ass playfully and she wiggles, her legs brushing over my dick. “Pretty sure that’s rape.”

  She shrugs and looks over her shoulder at me, “Not if I give consent.”

  “See, Shaw’s in.” Dane’s eyes flicker with amusement as they lock on mine. “Shaw is fun.”

  “Damn right.” She moves her body off us both, tucking between us, lying straight again. “As long as you don’t wake me. Why are we awake?”

  Dane laughs, “I got shit to do.”

  Shaw pouts, “On Christmas?”

  He shrugs, wrapping his arm around her shoulder sliding under the short sleeve of her t-shirt and brushing the skin of her arm. “Don’t worry. I’ll be back tonight and then we can talk about that threesome.”

  “Knock it off, fucker,” I growl and Shaw giggles.

  “You guys are idiots.”

  “You love us,” Dane says with a smile and she doesn’t argue. He kisses her head and then climbs off the bed, stretching. “You both know you want my cock.”

  Shaw follows him off the bed. “How did you know? I think we were just way too obvious about it.” She grins over at me and I force my ass off the bed.

  I go along with the charade. “You caught us.”

  “I fucking knew it.” He tugs his shoes on and ties them. Shaw and I follow Dane out into the hall. Pam is in the kitchen finishing up a cup of coffee. She smiles when she sees us.

  Most parents would probably be freaked out to see their teenage daughter with two men coming out of her room, but I don’t think Pam sees us as men. To her, we’ll always be those scrawny, dirty boys from the neighborhood.

  “I thought I heard three voices laughing last night when I got home.”

  Shaw takes Pam’s empty cup and rinses it in the sink. “You didn’t say hi?”

  Pam waves her off, walking out of the kitchen and we all follow. “I didn’t want to interrupt the fun. I wish I could make you all breakfast, but I’m already late.”

  Sha
w looks worriedly at her mother as Pam picks up her purse, searching through it. “It’s okay, mom. We can easily find something.”

  Pam smiles, pulling her keys out of her purse, but then exploding into a coughing fit. Dane walks over to her putting his hand on her small shoulder. “Fuck, Pam. Maybe you should go to the doctor.”

  Pam coughs a few times, her voice still hoarse as she laughs, “Oh no. I’m fine. I have to go.” She holds his face in her hands and kisses his cheek and then walks over to me, doing the same thing. “You two take care of our girl.”

  “Always.” I promise and she smiles.

  She walks over to Shaw pulling her into a big hug. “Merry Christmas, sweet girl.”

  “Merry Christmas, mom. I love you.”

  “I love you.” They say it so easily. Shaw has always had that, but I don’t miss the worry or the sadness on her face while she hugs her mother tight.

  She gets a kiss on the cheek too and then Pam is gone out the door into the snow.

  “Oh shit, I should have cleaned off the sidewalk,” Shaw says as she starts for the door, but Dane stops her.

  “I’ll do it. I’m on my way out anyway. You two don’t fuck without me.” He winks and Shaw and I both flip him off gaining a roar of laughter from him as he leaves, pulling the door closed behind him.

  “He’s not going to give up until we give in,” Shaw says, sitting down on the couch, tucking her legs under her, leaning her side against the cushion.

  “Not happening.” I sit next to her my back against the couch.

  “No?” She raises her eyebrows, looking way too fucking cute and playful. “Why? Are you afraid? People at school already think we have a threesome thing going on.”

  “People at school are fucking idiots.”

  She shrugs, “Maybe not.”

  I turn my head to look into her eyes, trying to see how serious she is. “Shaw,” I laugh. “Don’t.”

  “What?” She smiles, “You haven’t thought about it?”

  “About what, Shaw? Tag teaming my best friend with my other best friend? No.”

  She shoves my chest with her hand. “Liar.”

  Okay, maybe I’ve thought about it, but I would never fucking go there. “My idea of a threesome doesn’t involve another dick.”

  She laughs at that. “I’m sure he wouldn’t hurt you with that thing.”

  I shake my head, unable to stop the smile on my face. “That thing? Yeah, if you can’t say cock or dick, you are definitely not ready for a threesome.”

  “Whatever.” She stands up, in a damn good mood and it’s nice to hear her laughing and messing around. Dane’s good at getting her to loosen up. “I would be fantastic at threesomes.”

  I laugh at her ridiculousness. “Oh I’m sure.”

  I look up at her, and my heart races when I see her, biting on her bottom lip and seemingly lost in thought. One that seems to make her hot. A blush coming over her. Not so innocent anymore. “I need a shower.”

  I nod, trying not to stare at her full lips and wonder what exactly is going through her head. And what’s making her cheeks a shade of pink. Trying really fucking hard not to think about her stripping her clothes off and slipping into the hot water.

  At least I hope it’s hot for her sake.

  And now I’m lost in a whole different thought. A memory from the past when Shaw threatened my control.

  17 years old

  My dick is impossibly hard, and Shaw’s body feels way too fucking good pressed against it. Shit. I need to get a grip.

  She stirs and turns to look up at me, her eyes still looking pretty fucking tired, but she’s still beautiful.

  Always beautiful.

  Why I can’t tell her that, I’m not sure.

  “Morning.”

  She smiles. “Morning. You ready for the first day of our senior year?”

  I groan and stretch my arms, dropping one to rest over her hip. “Not really. I’m just ready for it to be over.”

  She’s only wearing a tank top and tiny little shorts because it’s so fucking hot in the house and I try like hell not to look down, but I can’t help it. My eyes drag lower seeing her hard nipples poking through the thin, gray material.

  “I need a shower. I smell like the diner.”

  She does, but I don’t hate it. She also smells like her. Just sweet, like vanilla and her own special scent that drives me crazy.

  “Okay.” I slept in just my boxers last night. I usually try to leave more layers between us, but it was way too hot even with the windows open and a fan on. I don’t move from under the covers, because even if she’s felt my boner many times, I still don’t want her to see it. And it is fucking apparent right now.

  I don’t want her to feel used. Like I only think of her as someone to stick my dick in.

  “Carter?”

  I look at her, and see she’s sitting up, staring down at me. Her lips pink and so unbelievably kissable. Fucking Dane, having to put that in my head.

  Okay, so it was already there.

  “What?”

  “You really don’t have to hide your dick from me.” I look up at her, almost shocked. I don’t know why though. It’s Shaw. We’ve known each other forever.

  “What?” I say my voice full of uncertainty.

  “You don’t want to get up because you’re hard right? Like afraid I’ll see something.”

  Wow, when did she get so blunt? And so…. not innocent? “I’m just tired. Didn’t feel like jumping right up.”

  “Right.” She smirks. “You sleep in my bed and poke me with that thing all the time.” I laugh at her choice of words. There’s that innocence. “Don’t be shy.”

  “If you want to see my dick, Shaw, all you have to do is ask.”

  I say it with teasing in my voice, but then I notice she’s not laughing. No, she’s chewing on her bottom lip with her gaze dragging down…down….down.

  “Shaw.” I barely croak her name out.

  Her pretty eyes snap to mine, but her voice is thick with desire. “I should go shower.”

  I nod my head dumbly, unable to take whatever the hell this is. “Okay.”

  She climbs off the bed and I try like hell not to notice her ass barely contained by her shorts.

  I lay flat on my back, trying to get my body to calm down when she comes back into her room. “Fuck, no water.”

  She flops down on the edge of the bed and I sit up, cautiously asking, “The bill’s not paid?”

  She shakes her head from side to side. “I thought they were going to give us until the end of the week, but I guess not.”

  Her sad, defeated tone lessens my erection, but if it didn’t, I would still move to her side and wrap my arm around her shoulder. “It’s okay. You can shower at my place.”

  She shakes her head from side to side. “No, I can’t use your water.”

  “Yes. You can. I paid the bill last week. Come on.”

  Her head rests on my shoulder. “Will it always be this difficult?”

  I want to tell her no. That things will get better, but the truth is I don’t believe that. I think we’re born into this and we’ll die in this.

  “No. Not for you, Shaw.” I kiss her forehead and then stand up, dragging her ass with me to my house.

  I let her shower, while I wait in my room. Thinking about her naked in my bathroom is almost enough to make me jerk off, but I’m glad I didn’t risk that when she walks in only moments later.

  “That was fast.”

  She laughs, but I can’t stop staring at her. She’s standing there, wrapped in the white towel I gave her with her long, dark hair wet.

  “I told you I didn’t want to use your water. So I compromised and washed up really fast.” She lifts a wet piece of her hair and sniffs it. “Now I smell like a dude.”

  I swallow roughly thinking about her using my shampoo and body wash. Wanting to move closer to her and smell it for myself.

  I stand up from my bed. “I guess I should go shower so
we aren’t late.”

  Neither of us move, as I stand right in front of her. I watch in part fascination and horror as she drops to her knees in front of me. “What are you doing?”

  Her fingers find the hem of my shorts, slipping underneath my boxers as well. “You know what I’m doing.”

  She licks her bottom lip and I almost come undone. Almost give in and let go of the control I’ve had over myself.

  “No.”

  She looks up at me with curiosity and maybe a little anger. “No?”

  “Why do you want to do this now?” I ask, my dick impossibly hard already with her on her knees in front of me, only a towel covering her. With her tits heaving, threatening to escape the knot she’s tucked between them.

  She smiles now, her eyes on my erection. “You did something nice for me and I want to do something nice for you.”

  And that is exactly why I can’t let her do this. “No. Get up.”

  She doesn’t move, but her lips pout with hurt. “What? You don’t want me to?”

  “Of course I do, but not as a payment. You don’t owe me anything.”

  “I was kidding.” She says it, but I don’t believe her.

  “No, you weren’t.”

  Her hands haven’t moved from my shorts, something I’m painfully aware of. Her eyes lower to the floor. “Well, you did take care of me.”

  I use one hand to tip her chin up to face me. “I’ll never treat you like a whore.”

  “That’s not what this is.”

  “No?” I remove my hand and gesture at her, “Do you see yourself right now?”

  Okay that was a total dick thing to say.

  “Asshole.” She hisses and stands up, her eyes boring into mine. “You let Karlie give you a blowjob at that party a couple of weeks ago.”

  “You act like it’s a fucking privilege to suck me off.” I can’t believe we’re talking about this.

  “Listening to her talk about it, it is.” She hisses, folding her arms under her tits, only serving to push them up and make them look even fuller.

  “Just stop. We’re seventeen. Still in high school. There’s no rush for this.”

  She scoffs, “Oh please. You and Dane have been having sex for years. Maybe I fucking want to.”