by Jamie Hawke
“Why’s he in Seattle?” Rose asked, frowning. “Only one reason I can think of.”
“He knew we were from this area and set up a trap.”
She nodded. “Exactly.”
“A fact that doesn’t negate our need for the compass,” Esmerelda cut in.
“And at this point, he likely has sketches out to his guards, or some way of showing them what we look like.” Frank held up a jacket that very much reminded him of Teddy.
“Not that one,” Esmerelda said with a look of disgust. “Not if you want these lips on your cock anytime soon.”
He laughed. “I’d take the jacket off, first.”
She turned, looking through other clothing nearby as if the discussion was over. Frank put the jacket back, rejoining in the search. But he found himself being drawn to look at the magazine again, skimming the article, wondering again how the hell everything had gotten so messed up.
Rose and Keisha were looking for an outfit for Rose, something less red. Esmerelda held up some shirts and pants, and Frank nodded over to the changing room, explaining what it was for. She waited for him to enter first, then followed with her stash of clothing.
“It’s not really stealing, right?” Frank undid his old shirt, going for the commercial, fake one instead. “I mean, we’re going to change all this, fix time. So, in that sense…”
“True.” She faced him, smiled, and undid the laces of her shirt before pulling it up and over her head. Her perky breasts now exposed, Frank froze. He glanced around at the mirror on one side, then the other—creating the effect of numerous versions of Esmerelda and those perfect tits.
“What—er, what’re you doing?” he asked.
“Simply changing.” She stepped forward, grabbing him by the back of his head and pulling his face into her chest. “You know, seeing what clothes fit.”
At that last word, she reached into his pants, feeling his hardening cock. “Ooh, I think this one will fit just right.”
He wasn’t fighting this one bit. If she wanted him in the dressing room, who was he to argue? Taking her breasts in his hands, he pressed his lips to her upper left breast, then ran his tongue down to her nipple.
“I’m not sure we have time for this.” He kept going though, unable to stop himself.
She licked her lips, breath halting for a brief moment. “We’ll be quick.”
“I can make that work.” He started hiking up her skirt.
She swatted his hand away, grinning as she knelt. “No time for that. Just you. Right here.”
With a nervous glance at the slit in the door—only wide enough for someone to see them if they were to press their face up against it—he gulped and nodded. As if she needed permission. She was already undoing his pants, fingers running through his pubes, caressing the base of his cock, then pulling it out and stroking it. On the second stroke, her mouth joined her hand, first a tongue flick, playing with him, then lips moving around the head of his cock. She pulled back slightly, letting her lower lip slide along him, then dove in, taking as much as she could handle.
He nearly toppled over with the pleasure, hands grabbing her head for balance and accidentally causing her to go further, gagging. She pulled back with a cough and wild look in her eyes.
A knock on the door preceded a woman’s voice. “Is everything okay in there?”
“Yes, just… the pants are a little tight,” Frank replied.
“Oh, I can bring you a bigger size. Just hang them over the door.”
Esmerelda glared up at him, then mouthed, “Tight?”
He shrugged. “Um, I’ll probably find another color anyway. Thank you, though.”
“If you need anything, just holler.” It sounded like the lady was walking off.
“Sorry,” Frank said.
Esmerelda hesitated a moment, rotated her neck, then said, “For that, I’m going to give you a sound beating.” Her hand started working him again, this time harder, faster. It almost hurt, except then she suddenly had him in her mouth, hands reaching around to grab his ass and pull him into it, working the motion. She did this a bit and then pulled back, gasping for breath and stroking him again while keeping the top half of his cock in her mouth.
He put a hand on the wall this time, not wanting to ruin the moment, and had no sooner found a stable position than he felt his cock surging, his abs cramping, and a tingling sensation running up his spine. His next breath came out halting, his eyes closing. His legs nearly gave out as he came in her mouth, and again as she didn’t let up. The orgasm ran its course and then seemed to hit again, so that this time he had to brace against the wall.
Esmerelda swallowed, gave it one last lick, and then blew him a kiss before standing and giving it a nice pat.
“Good boy.”
“Shit,” he whispered, barely able to talk in the excitement. “Good fucking girl.”
“Hey, had to get you back for the crow’s nest, right?”
Frank’s grin at the memory of fingering her atop the pirate ship couldn’t be hidden. “I’d say you did, and then some.”
She chuckled. “Of course, now the lady out there’s paying attention this way… What do we do?”
“Offer to sew clothes to pay for this stuff or… run for it.”
“I say the latter. Pirates, after all.”
Frank was about to make a valid point, which was regarding the fact that pirates were everywhere, so this world was probably quite used to the idea of shoplifting. But she was already grabbing the clothes, turning to throw the door open, and saying, “Go!”
Fuck. His cock was still hanging out! A couple walking past glanced over, froze with jaws dropping, and Frank ran. Dammit, what else could he do? He grabbed clothes in one hand, holding them over his crotch for privacy, and took off after Esmerelda.
“Get out of here,” Esmerelda called out to Keisha and Rose, who were only just now turning to see what was happening.
“Shit!” Rose shouted, then grabbed a vase of flowers from the checkout counter and threw it.
A loud crack resounded around the room, and Frank turned to see that the shopkeeper had fired a pistol. It only missed because that vase had hit her arm, but she hadn’t dropped her gun. She went to fire again, but that was the last image Frank saw before throwing himself around the corner after his ladies, all of them scrambling to get out of there. Sure, they could’ve drawn on her and probably even taken her down, but they wanted to take some clothes, nothing more. They certainly didn’t want to kill someone in the process.
To their relief, they found a hallway for the restrooms that also had an exit, and soon they were out of there, at the rear of the shopping center.
“I didn’t know you were so crazy,” Frank grunted, catching up with Esmerelda and pausing to tuck away his now-limp cock.
“What’s going on here?” Keisha asked as she turned to see what he was doing.
“Ah, no,” Rose said, apparently there too. “I can’t unsee that.”
“Hey, I just…” No, there was nothing to say to that. Instead, Frank nodded at the clothes. “We got outfits. Let’s get to work.”
To Frank’s relief, nobody said another word about their strange shoplifting experience.
6
Changing had gone smoothly. They’d found a spot behind some dumpsters in the alley next to the mall, and soon they were on the move again. They had a different look and a destination. Oddly, they now looked like Frank had always imagined Hollywood actors in their method-acting madness would look like when hanging out at night clubs. Pirate clothing of this century had less of that old-school frilly look to it, and more of a punk rock vibe. He could dig it, even if the pants were way too tight. Somehow cowboys pulled it off, so he figured he’d manage.
It only took another five minutes of walking before they stopped at an intersection with a view of the Space Needle rising high above, that strange pirate flag flapping in the wind. There was the building directly behind it, Rick the Dick’s headquarters and, a
t least for now, their best chance at finding the compass he’d stolen. Frank had one that Rose had kept hidden, with the red stone that had fallen out during the scuffle with Rick, but they would need the other two stones to put a stop to the man and the way he’d changed the world.
The plan was simply to walk in and figure it out as they went. It wasn’t like they were professional burglars or heist conmen or whatever. They were mere pirates. That said, Frank knew a thing or two about working his way around these buildings. His mother had worked a corporate job most of her life, and when he was young he’d get to spend days with her at work from time to time, often sneaking off to explore. The secret was to meander past some desk where a guard had been lazy enough to leave out his key card—and there was always a guard who did. Almost always, anyway. The other trick wasn’t as easy since it involved waiting until someone exited a door you wanted to go through, and be waiting with an item to slide in and block the door before it closed. Neither was genius, but they’d either work or they’d figure out something else.
To Frank’s surprise, neither was immediately doable because a security guard stood at the entrance to the elevators. Frank led the way, but as soon as he saw the guard, kept walking past the doors and around the corner.
“What now?” Rose said, having seen the guy too.
Esmerelda put a hand on the hilt of her sword. “Take him out the old-fashioned way?”
Frank frowned, still put off by the idea that they now lived in a society where sword and guns were not only allowed to be carried around, but now seemed to be the norm. “No. Thing is, they might be expecting us.”
“And we don’t even know if it’ll be here.”
“If he’s here, it’ll be here.”
“Hey,” Keisha said, and she nodded to a back door that was opening.
The group froze, then Frank glanced around, looking for something to lodge in the door. Dammit, as much as Seattle had fallen apart, it sure was clean. Not a single discarded can or even a rock for him to use. His hands went to his body next, remembering he had no wallet, only the compass.
Rose made eye contact with him and shook her head. “Don’t you dare.”
Instead, she had another idea. As soon as the door was open, she stepped over, looking seductive, ready. Frank turned away, not wanting to see this. Only, a woman emerged, wearing a pantsuit and pulling out a pack of smokes.
“Get her, tiger,” Keisha said and shoved Frank forward.
“Shit.” Frank came to a stop next to the woman, grinning awkwardly. “You know those things will kill you.”
The woman glared at him. “Swords, bullets… I choose my poison.”
She took a step away from the door. Frank decided he didn’t have time for this. He lunged forward, grabbed the door, and shoved it open. “Go!”
“Fuck.” The woman lunged, but Esmerelda was there behind her, cutlass out and slamming her in the back of the head with the hilt. The woman collapsed, out cold, as Rose grabbed her and dragged her through the door after them.
Of course, there were two workers lounging right there and shooting the shit. Both stood at the sight—two large men.
“We have a problem?” Frank said, very aware of how he, this lanky guy with three women, would look going up against these two.
But neither was armed, and the team wasn’t being shy about brandishing their weapons.
“No, they aren’t going to give us any shit,” Keisha said, pistol in the air. The door clicked shut behind them. One of the men flinched, then both of them took off.
“What if they tell someone we’re here?” Esmerelda asked.
“It won’t matter.” Frank was already on the move. “After the event at UW, I imagine they’re already on the alert.”
They found the stairs and quickly started up, although Keisha pointed out they didn’t know what floor they were going to.
“The top,” Frank explained. “A man like Rick? It’ll be the top.”
“The… top.” Rose growled. “Of course, it’d have to be the fucking top, and me in heels.”
“You picked them out,” Frank reminded her. “Sorry, but we don’t exactly have time to go back to the mall.”
She glared, but kept going.
While they were only three-inch heels, Frank had to imagine that wouldn’t be pleasant. He wondered why she didn’t simply remove her shoes and try without, but hey, who was he to say anything.
“This is so fucking stupid,” Keisha pointed out. “What happens when we’re caught? This whole thing falls apart and we’re fucked. No?”
“We have two options,” Frank replied. “Way I see it, we can try and risk letting everything keep going like this, if we fail. Or, we can do nothing, and we definitely fail. Either way, this is our best shot.”
Esmerelda grunted. “I’d argue, say we need to come up with a plan. You’d think with a time travel device, we’d have all the time in the world.”
“Except that it’s the enemy who has the device.” Rose panted, taking a breather.
“Exactly. Meaning every moment we waste is more time for him to time-fuck us.”
“I don’t want to imagine that,” Frank cut in, trying to be funny. All of them looked at him like he was an idiot. He shrugged.
Finally, they reached the top floor. Pausing at the door, Frank leaned against it to take a glance. But the door wouldn’t budge. Of course it was locked. Everyone was breathing heavily, while Keisha had to lean against the wall to stabilize herself.
“On it,” Rose said, stepping forward. She took another deep breath as she analyzed the door. With a nod, she took her sword and jammed it into the area where the locking mechanism would’ve been.
“That’s not going to wo—” Frank started, when her blade made a cracking sound and the door popped open.
“How the fuck do you break a cutlass?” Keisha asked, looking at Rose’s now semi-snapped blade.
“Dammit,” Rose said, looking at her sword and propping open the door with her foot. “Not Helga.”
“Helga?” Frank asked. “The sword’s name was Helga?”
Rose chuckled. “Why not?”
He nodded. Sure. Taking a peek through the door, he noted that they were still in a back hallway of sorts. They worked their way out of the stairwell, following the white-walled hallway with blue carpeted floor to another door that led into a main hall with a conference room, several visiting rooms, and one main office.
A man was in there. Frank pulled out his pistol, ready, but then ducked back. “Just a janitor.”
“So the compass might not even be here.” Keisha leaned past him to have a look, her breasts brushing against his arm in a way that caused him to glance down at her very-much-revealed cleavage. She caught him looking and grinned.
“No,” Rose hissed.
“What?” Frank glanced around, confused.
“No time for you to have a quickie in the enemy’s office. Sorry.”
Keisha blushed, pulling back.
“I’m not—that wasn’t even what…” Frank stared, flabbergasted. “Is that any way for a grandma to talk to her grandson?”
Esmerelda laughed. “You know you were thinking it. I saw the look in your eyes.”
“Not when my grandma is around.”
“But if I weren’t?” Rose arched an eyebrow. When he couldn’t respond, she laughed. “Thought so.”
The sound of a door clicking came, and Frank glanced over to see the janitor leaving. Rose was kneeling a moment later, motioning to her ears. Frank wasn’t sure what she meant but then saw the headphones the janitor was wearing. He wouldn’t notice if there was noise, so Frank went for it. He held out his hand for her broken sword, timed it right, and tossed the thing across the carpet.
It rolled and he thought maybe he’d missed, but then the edge of it stuck in the door, just barely, before it closed.
Score.
Rose was looking at him like he was an idiot, but he didn’t care. The janitor was in the elevator,
so they ducked around the corner again until the elevator doors closed.
“I don’t think the door had a lock,” Rose said.
Frank scoffed. “Sorry, but… not all locks are as obvious as the one on the stairs. You forget, this is my time.”
She shrugged.
“It was an impressive toss,” Keisha noted. “All clear.”
Frank gave her a nod of thanks for the compliment, watching Esmerelda as she darted forward, pushed open the door, and indicated a locking mechanism.
“Fine, good call,” Rose admitted with a pat on his back.
“Hey, I figured it made sense. His office—if there’s a chance the compass is in here, he’d have it locked up.”
“Meaning he also probably has it in a safe or something.”
Frank frowned, realizing she was probably right. He worked his way over to the desk, to the bookshelves behind it, looking. There was one book among the others that stood out, its cover facing them and with an image of a World War II fighter plane on it.
The fucker was mocking them, Frank realized. Like, “Here it is, come and get it.”
Not being the type to back away from a challenge, Frank opened the book and stared at the compass. There it was, sitting in a cutout area meant to hide it.
He had it! Holding the compass high, he turned to his team, grinning. “It can’t be this easy, can it?”
Rose frowned. “Maybe?”
“In the movies there’s always this really elaborate scheme.” Frank ignored the curious glances from Esmerelda and Keisha at his mentioning movies again. He was really going to have to set aside some time to update them on that—probably with a good run-through of all the classics. The Princess Bride, Jurassic Park, all the Harry Potter movies, of course. But for now, he simply grinned at the sight of the compass in his hand. “Maybe reality can cut us some slack, though?”
“Doubt it,” Rose countered, but nodded at the thing. “Give it a go and find out.”
Frank did so. A light turned on, but it wasn’t a holoscreen or anything fancy like normal. Simply a light on the face of the compass that read, “Fuck you.”
“Oh, shit.” He turned it over to retrieve the stones inside, then tossed the compass against the wall so that it shattered before hitting the ground.